by Mia Ford
As the night progressed, the stress of the week crashed down on me, and I laid my head on the pillow. I was exhausted but trying to keep myself awake, not wanting to assume he wanted me to stay with him in his bed. However, as I fought to keep my eyes open, he leaned over and turned off the television, scooted down behind me, pulled me close to him, and laid down with me, closing his eyes. I held my breath for a moment, unsure of what to do, but the feeling of his warmth and comfort made me feel safe and right. So, underneath the shining of the moon, I fell asleep in Tanner’s arms, knowing love was a fickle thing. I didn’t know how exactly I felt, but I knew that everything about that moment was perfection.
Chapter 17
Tanner
The sun was shining through the windows, and I rolled over to face Ava, her sweet face sleeping soundly in the covers. She was so beautiful with her long, dark hair sprawled out above her and her fair skin highlighted by the natural rose of her cheeks. Her pouty lips were pink and looked a little chapped from the five o’clock shadow I had forgotten to shave before she came over. Everything about that moment was flawless, and I didn’t have even a second thought about having her spend the night at my place. In fact, she lit up my life in a way I couldn’t even begin to understand. I ran my fingers down her shoulders and kissed her forehead. She smiled and snuggled back into the blankets, falling back asleep.
I figured I would make us some breakfast, so I crept out of the bed and pulled on some shorts and a sweatshirt before walking out into the living room. It was still rainy and gray outside, but it didn’t dampen my mood at all. Knowing Ava was in the other room was enough comfort for me to keep my spirits high. As I stepped into the kitchen to check out what food I had in the house, the house phone rang, which was strange since the only person who called that was the security guard if I had a visitor. I picked up the line and took in a deep breath.
“Hello?”
“Mr. Johnson,” he said. “You have a visitor. A Mr. Dean Markus to see you.”
“Uh, shit,” I said. “Okay. Give me five minutes and then send him up.”
I hung up the phone and looked around the apartment, running through the living room and picking up all of Ava’s belongings. How the hell was I supposed to get Ava out of the apartment when Dean was in it. This was bad, really bad. I ran through the living room and down the hall, turning the corner and flicking the light on. I shook Ava, feeling bad for waking her but panicking.
“Ava,” I said. “Wake up.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Your father,” I said breathlessly. “He’s downstairs. They are sending him up in five minutes. I brought all your things in. I'm going to try to get rid of him as fast as possible, but you have to hide in here.”
“What the fuck is going on?”
“I don’t know,” I said, pulling on a pair of khakis and a sweater. “I don’t even know how he knew where I lived.”
“Oh, God,” she said, looking panicked.
I sat down next to her on the bed and kissed her on the lips trying to calm her down. I cradled her face in my hands and forced her to look me in the eyes. Immediately, I could feel her muscles relax.
“Don’t worry,” I whispered. “Everything will be okay. I’ll take care of this, okay?”
“Okay,” she said taking a deep breath.
We both looked up as the elevator in the hall dinged, and there was a knock on the door. My heart was racing, and I kissed her deeply one last time before walking out of the bedroom and closing the door behind me. I smoothed down my hair and did another quick look around the living room to make sure everything was cleaned up. I walked over to the door and took in a deep breath, pulling the door opening and smiling big as Dean appeared in front of me.
“Hey, man,” I said happily. “This is a nice surprise. Come on in.”
“Thanks,” he said looking worse for wear. “I’m sorry to barge in like this.”
“No, man,” I said. “You’re fine. What’s going on?”
I led him over to the couch, feeling like he had something pretty serious to talk about. At first, my heart began to race, but then I realized if he knew anything about Ava, he would not be calm like he was. Instead, he looked hurt, almost betrayed, and I could tell from his red eyes that he had not slept the night before. He sat on the couch looking around the room but not actually seeing anything. He put his elbows on his knees and hung his head down, shaking it back and forth.
“What’s going on, Dean? Is everything okay?”
“I caught Lindy fucking the pool boy last night,” he said, choking up. “I just walked in and found them together. It was fucking terrible.”
“Holy shit, man,” I said sitting down next to him. “I am so sorry. That’s fucking horseshit. After everything you’ve done for that woman, and she does this to you?”
“I know,” he said weepily. “We fought all night and then I left. I didn’t really know where else to go. I couldn’t tell Ava, not yet. It would break her heart. So, I came here.”
“You made the right choice, Dean,” I said, glancing over at my bedroom door.
“I don’t even know what to do at this point,” he said taking in a deep breath. “I’m completely lost. I never thought I would have to go through this. I mean, I knew other guys who had gone through it, but I really thought it would never be me. Not Lindy.”
“Absolutely,” I said, shaking my head. “You’re a good man, and you’ve always been there for your family. It was your biggest sacrifice.”
“I just don’t know what happened,” he said, putting his head in his hands. “This is really messed up.”
“What can I do?”
“I don’t know where to go,” he said. “Would you mind if I stayed here for a few days and cleared my mind. I need to figure this all out before making some rash decision.”
Fuck. Instantly, my stomach dropped, knowing Ava was in the other room, probably heard all of it, and I was going to have to get her out of the apartment without her father seeing her. How did I get myself into this shit? Of course, I couldn’t turn the man down. He was absolutely devastated, and we just got our friendship back on track after about a decade of fighting and bickering. I patted him on the shoulder and looked around.
“Of course, you can,” I said kindly. “I have a guest bedroom with its own bath, and I’ll get you a visitor pass so you can come and go as you please. You can stay here as long as you want.”
“Thank you,” he said with a sigh. “You’re a real lifesaver. I know we just started our friendship over, but it's really great of you to be there for me like this.”
“Always,” I said, nodding my head.
I had to think of a way to get him out of the apartment for a while so that Ava could make a break for it. This was not what I’d had in mind when I woke up. I was planning on fixing us a nice breakfast in bed and just relaxing with a lazy Saturday that I’d hoped to stretch to a lazy Sunday. We could eat, make love, take a nap and do it all over again, really relax and have an amazing time. I knew, though, that this was going to affect Dean hard, and he needed a place to be.
“Hey, man,” I said, a solution popping into my head. “It’s early, but do you want to go get a drink?”
“Hell, yeah, I do,” he said, brightening up.
“Awesome,” I said with a sigh. “Let me change and brush my teeth, and we can head out. You just make yourself at home.”
“Alright, man,” he said, leaning back.
I jumped up from the couch and hurried toward the bedroom, only opening the door a sliver before scooting in and closing the door softly behind me. Ava was sitting there in the bed, a look of bewilderment on her face. She was dressed and clutching her coat, shaking her head back and forth. I sat down next to her and pulled her into my chest. I didn’t know what she knew at that point, but I had to figure out a way to tell her.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I know this is crazy.”
“I just have no words,” she said sniffling.<
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“Look,” I said pulling back and looking her in the face. “Your dad said that—”
“I heard everything.” She shook her head. “Everything. I can’t believe my mother would do this.”
“I’m so sorry, Ava,” I said hugging her again.
This was not right. I should be there for her, not having her sneak out of my apartment like we were teenagers getting caught. She needed me at that moment, and I was starting out something special between us by tossing her to the side. However, with everything going on with her father, that was not the time to reveal to him our secret.
“I want to be here for you,” I said, lifting her chin. “But I have to get you out of here so your father doesn’t find out. I told him we would go get some drinks. I’ll take him a few blocks away, so you can take your time and get out comfortably. Text me when you make it home safely.”
“Whatever,” she whispered, shaking her head. “Just go, I want to get home.”
I felt bad, and she was obviously upset with me. She sat there and watched me as I pulled clothes out of the closet and got dressed. I brushed my teeth and walked back over to her, leaning over to kiss her lips. She turned her face away from me, tears pooling in her eyes. I sighed and kissed her cheek before grabbing my wallet and phone and creeping back outside. I shut the door behind me and stood there for a second, wishing there was some other way for me to be there for both of them. This was an absolutely impossible situation, and I had to choose between the two of them. This was going to take a toll on Ava, big time. I also knew there was a good chance that this would highly affect our future together, which was something I was really trying to avoid. It was becoming annoying how the universe seemed to push back against us, but I was determined to not let it win.
“You ready?” I stood there with my jacket over my arm looking at Dean who was standing at the window looking over the city.
“Yeah,” he said, turning around and faking a smile.
We walked out of the apartment and closed the doors. I locked them for show and stepped into the elevator, letting out a deep breath as the doors closed. Ava might be upset with me, but at least her father won’t find out about all this, especially not while he was going through something as traumatizing as his wife cheating on him. We jumped into a cab and I gave them the address of an Irish pub in upper Manhattan where we could get some breakfast and some whiskey at the same time.
Dean sat quietly staring out the window, and I tried to get my mind off the fact that I left Ava there to sneak out of the apartment. I wanted to text her but at that point, it was too risky, and I knew she was upset with me over all of this. I had made friends with her father, thinking it would help her out but it seemed to have backfired in my face. As much as I wanted Dean in my life, Ava had almost become more important, and now, I was regretting making the choice.
Hopefully, by the time we got back, Ava would be home, relaxed, and a little less in shock. It would be a long few days with Dean at my house and me unable to see Ava outside of work, but I would just have to survive it. Hopefully, Ava could remember that I cared about her, and this didn’t all come crashing down around me.
Chapter 18
Ava
I sat on the edge of the bed clutching my coat for about fifteen minutes after my father and Tanner had left. My weekend had started out with a bang, and now I felt like I had been shot in the chest. Everything was perfect, and I was finally starting to let Tanner in, and then, my father shows up at the door. I had to sneak out of Tanner’s apartment like I was a goddamn hooker instead of a grown woman making her own decisions. Now, though, with my mother having cheated on my father, there was no way I could come out and be honest with him. It would break his heart. Even if I didn’t tell him that I was seeing Tanner and just told him that I worked for the company, he would feel betrayed by both me and Tanner, and all while he was going through one of the hardest things in his life.
I didn’t know what my mother was thinking, sleeping with some young pool boy, but I wanted to give her a piece of my mind. At that moment, though, that was the least of my worries, considering I was about to make the worst walk of shame I had ever experienced. I got up and went in the bathroom, trying to make myself look presentable. I stared at my face in the mirror. My cheeks were rosy, my eyes were sad, and my hair was poufy, great. With a sigh, I pulled my hair back in a high ponytail, letting the curls do their thing. I knew exactly what I needed. I needed my best friend.
I left the apartment, locking the doorknob and pulling the door closed after checking my things several times. I left all the lights on in the house, so it wouldn’t look different when they got back. My father was a smart man and knew when things were off. The last thing I wanted was for him to start getting suspicious. I went out of the lobby and caught a cab, looking around like I was a criminal trying to sneak away from a crime scene. I gave the cab Brianna’s address and sat back, resting my head against the back of the seat and closing my eyes.
How did everything get so messed up? I couldn’t even start to think about what happened, or anything that I had heard my father say. I knew he was being candid, and he would have never acted like that in front of me. He was a tough man, full of pride, and I knew it must have taken him a lot to go to Tanner and ask him for help. At least I knew my father was safe and with someone who would look out for him. I, on the hand, was wandering blindly, not sure where I should land. I knew that Brianna would have some advice, she always did when it really mattered.
When the cab pulled up in front of Brianna’s apartment complex, I paid the driver and climbed the stairs to the fourth floor, stopping halfway to take off my heels. I knew she wasn’t going to be awake yet, but I had a really good reason for waking her up. It wasn’t very often that I had drama in my life. It was usually her with her easy-going personality and fuck-it reasoning. This time, though, I would need her to tell it like she always did, straight and to the point. I didn’t want anyone to continue sugarcoating things to me like I was a child. I was a grown woman, and it was starting to get really annoying having to hide things from people and be involved in this mess of a tryst with Tanner. I was sick and tired of all of it.
When I got to her door, I rang the doorbell several times, listening to her shuffling around the apartment. I waved at the peephole and watched as she flung the door open, her hair a mess but her eyes wide with curiosity. She stepped to the side and let me in, closing the door behind us. I could tell she already knew something big was going on.
“Well, hello there,” she said. “Either you had a seriously fancy breakfast or you are wearing the same clothes as last night.”
“Ugh,” I said, plopping down on her couch and dropping my shoes on the floor. “Hell, that is where I’ve been. Straight hell.”
“Let me start some coffee,” she said, almost too excited.
When she came back with two cups of coffee and handed me one I took it from her and breathed in the aroma. I closed my hands around the hot cup and wished I was home, sleeping happily in my own bed. Instead, I was at my best friends, about to reveal all my dirty little secrets.
“Okay,” she said sitting down. “Spill it.”
“I was at Tanner’s last night and ended up staying the night,” I said.
“What? Wait, you’re sleeping with him?”
“Yeah,” I said. “But the bigger problem was that my father showed up at the door this morning before I was even awake. He had come to talk to Tanner.”
“About what?”
“Apparently, my mother cheated on him with the pool boy,” I said shaking my head.
“Miguel?” She scrunched her nose, and I laughed.
“No,” I chuckled. “Miguel was like eighty. I’m assuming it’s the new guy I saw last time I went over. Regardless, my mom is a whore, and I was stuck in Tanner’s apartment sneaking out like you used to at your boyfriend’s in high school.”
“Wow,” she said, shaking her head. “As the world, fucking turns.”
“Tell me about it,” I sighed, leaning back.
I really wanted a pair of pajamas, a pint of ice cream, a fifth of vodka, and some really cheesy chick flicks. I knew, however, that it was not a good idea to go breaking down into full girl mode. I had to get my shit together.
“I don’t know what to do,” I said. “I can’t be with Tanner now. It’s too weird.”
I looked up at her face, which was riddled in confusion. I forgot that I hadn’t talked to her about anything that was going on, keeping everything very close to my chest to keep my father from finding out. Between work and Tanner, I hadn’t really had the time to even call Brianna, much less fill her in on all the craziness that was now my life. I didn’t feel like explaining myself, nor did I have the luxury of giving in to my feelings for Tanner. I had let my guard down the night before, thinking that life was finally going to let me have a break, but I had been setting myself up for another dramatic event. I should have listened to myself and stayed home from our date. I should have just put on some pj’s, told Tanner I was sorry that we couldn’t do this, and stayed at home. Instead, I decided to be a flirty young girl and give in to something I wasn’t even sure Tanner felt the same way about. Sure, he had me spend the night, but that was hardly an open invitation to a relationship. A relationship I didn’t even know if I wanted in the first place.