Allen was unsteady on his feet, hesitant in his step, and exhausted in his frame. He had to fly the shuttle to Boston to see his cardiologist. I sensed that, for the first time, he didn’t have the energy to fly by himself. “Allen, I’ll go with you,” I reassured him in the early twilight of a late February afternoon. He protested that it was not necessary. I insisted and he gave in happily.
I carried my bag and his. He shuffled with me. In the taxi to LaGuardia Airport, Allen asked for his book bag. The taxi was dark, only lit by the street lamps whisking by in an alternating stream. As the vehicle sped between lanes, I felt my stomach rise up to my throat and stick there. Allen said, “Listen to this. I started it last night!” He was laughing and cracking up. He searched in his journal and found the scrawled poem. It started:
When I die
I don’t care what happens to my body
throw ashes in the air, scatter ’em in the East River
bury an urn in Elizabeth New Jersey, B’nai Israel Cemetery
But I want a big funeral
I wanted the cab ride to be over. I didn’t want to hear the poem, but it got funnier and funnier. He was almost in hysterics as he listed what all his myriad boyfriends would say at his funeral. He wanted to know if I could add any lines. I suggested that women would all say, “He never did remember my name.”
On the shuttle, Allen fell into a deep sleep. I stared at the deep lines in his face. He seemed so far away. I thought he might be dead. But at the beginning of our descent, he jerked awake, grabbed his notebook, scribbled for about two minutes, and read me this American sentence: “My father dying of Cancer, head drooping, ‘Oy kindelach.’”
Allen’s health continued to deteriorate. Poems were being written so fast that we could not keep up with them. Weeks after the trip to Boston, Allen entered Beth Israel Hospital in New York City. One of the doctors in the Emergency Room handed Allen a poem he had written seeking Allen’s improvements. Allen obliged and was pleased as he confided in me that it was “a much stronger poem now.” In the hospital, Allen asked for a copy of Mother Goose. I brought my children’s Rackham edition. “Starry Rhymes” injected pure beauty into the simple rhymes. The poetry of late March 1997 reflected Allen’s lively mind balancing the primary hospital bodily events and his childhood innocence so long overridden in the need to grow up fast in a dysfunctional family.
Although we are unsure that Allen had finished with the rhymes dated March 24, 1997, we include them as exemplar of the pure, supple child Allen slipped in and out of in the late stages of liver cancer. “Dream” resolves contradictions inherent in his long love affair with Peter Orlovsky and remained the last poem written before the fatal diagnosis of liver cancer. After being told of the massive metastasized cancer within him, Allen Ginsberg only completed one poem in his final week of life. “Things I’ll Not Do (Nostalgias)” is the only poem that Allen did not have a chance to proof and amend before his death. The poem is a compendium of farewells, with honest regrets and true Buddhist ability to let go. Allen was sad to leave the world, but he was also exhilarated.
Besides calling friends to take leave, and extract a few promises, he wrote a final political letter to President Clinton. He prefaces his note with, “Enclosed some recent political poems.” Allen lapsed into his death coma before he could select the poems.
In preparing Death & Fame, Peter Hale, Bill Morgan, and myself have honored Allen’s insistence on chronology and notes. We have included each poem as Allen fashioned it. We suspect that some of the short verse would be further revised and combined. These are the final poetry breaths—no more Allen Ginsberg. When Allen died many people felt as if a large hole gaped in their lives. Allen left many writings and songs to fill that hole. With Death & Fame, we find the circle will be unbroken.
Bob Rosenthal
July 7, 1998
Notes
(p. 1063) “New Democracy Wish List”
Ryan White Care Act—A federal program designed to provide support services for people with HIV/AIDS. The act was named for youth Ryan White, a hemophiliac who had contracted HIV through blood transfusion. His battle to return to school helped advance the rights of people living with AIDS.
SLA—Savings & Loan Association, a 1980’s Federal program to bail out bankrupted savings & loan banks resulted in much mis-use and corruption.
Hand & Lavoro Bank Thuggery—Lavoro: Banca Nazionale del Lavoro.
(p. 1066) “Peace in Bosnia-Herzegovina”
Thich Nhat Hanh—(b. 1926) Zen monk, exiled from Vietnam, heads a retreat community in the south of France. Authored over seventy-five books.
Sakharov—Andrei Sakharov (1921–1989) Russian engineer and humanist, first known as “father of the Soviet Hydrogen Bomb” but soon realized radioactivity’s hazards and in a series of articles confronted the Soviet government. In 1975, he was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.
Albert Schweitzer—(1875–1965) Theologian, minister, medical missionary in Gabon, Organist, awarded the Nobel Peace prize in 1952. Schweitzer was in fact Sartre’s cousin, though Sartre referred to him as “uncle Al.”
(p. 1068) “After the Party”
Coemergent Wisdom—A key term in Vajrayana Buddhism referring to the simultaneous arising of samsara and nirvana, naturally giving birth to wisdom.
(p. 1069) “After Olav H. Hauge”
Olav H. Hauge—Norwegian poet (1908–1994). Trained as a gardener, his work was inspired by the natural world.
Bodø—Second largest city of northern Norway, just inside the Arctic Circle.
(p. 1074) “Tuesday Morn”
Exquisite Corpse—Literary Journal, edited by poet Andrei Codrescu.
Peter’s flown—Peter Orlovsky
Sawang’s … confirmation—Sawang: Previous title for Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche (see note, page 108). Confirmation: Or enthronement in Tibetan Buddhism, it is the formal recognition of an incarnation.
(p. 1076) “God”
Willendorf Venus—Late Stone-Age limestone statuette of Venus, found near the village of Willendorf, Austria.
39 patriarchs—In Chinese and Zen Buddhism, patriarch is the founder of a school and his successors. In some accounts lineages are traced back to 28 original Patriarchs in India, and many more in China, although never as a group of 39—. It’s likely the Author remembered incorrectly here.
(p. 1078) “Excrement”
Polyhymnia—Polyhymnia (Polymnia) is one of the nine muses; sometimes considered the muse of Sacred Poetry.
(p. 1083) “Pastel Sentences”
The author had worked out a series of 108 seventeen syllable sentences describing individual pastel paintings by Francesco Clemente. With a copy of the catalogue, he continued to polish them as he traveled on. Included here are the sentences that the Author felt could stand alone without accompanying images.
(p. 1089) “Is About”
muggles—Hipster term for marijuana cigarette.
(p. 1091) “The Ballad of the Skeletons”
Yahoo—From Swift’s Gulliver’s Travels: A member of a race of brutes who have all the human vices, hence a boorish, crass, or stupid person.
Heritage Policy—Heritage Foundation: Conservative foundation think tank, often thwarting NEA projects, opposing social welfare programs and favoring strict FCC restrictions on “indecent” language. In their own words “One of the nations largest public policy research organizations.”
NAFTA—North American Free Trade Agreement, passed by President Clinton and Congress over objections of many labor and environmental groups concerned about lowered workplace and ecological safeguards.
Maquiladora—Foreign-owned factories operating on the Mexican side of the U.S./Mexican border producing goods mainly for the U.S. market.
GATT—General Agreement on Tariffs and Trade.
I.M.F.—International Monetary Fund.
(p. 1097) “Bowel Song”
Bam—Seed syllable for Vajrayogini, one of the Author’s principal Tibetan Bud
dhist practices.
(p. 1101) “Power”
Yuga—As in kaliyuga, Sanskrit for “age,” as in the dark age.
(p. 1102) “Anger”
Carolyn—Carolyn Cassady
(p. 1103) “Multiple Identity Questionnaire”
chela—Sanskrit term, literally “servant,” though often used as the general word for a student, as in a spiritual student seeking guidance from a teacher.
neti neti—“Not this, not this.” Vedantic process of discrimination by negation.
Maya—Sanskrit term in Buddhism meaning “deception, illusion, appearance,” the continually changing impermanent phenomenal world of appearances and forms of illusion or deception which the unenlightened mind takes as the only reality.
(p. 1104) “Don’t Get Angry with Me”
Chödok Tulku—Gelugpa school Tibetan Lama friend of Gelek Rin-poche, he was a guest speaker at a summer retreat attended by the Author. Because of nervousness or difficulty with English, he repeatedly interjected, “Don’t get angry with me.” The Author found it funny and innocent and wrote this poem during the lecture.
Tila, Mila, Marpa, Naro—Said here in prayer form, it is short for Tilopa, Milarepa, Marpa, Naropa (Gampopa). The line of saints or Mahasidhas of Kagupa lineage of Tibetan Buddhism.
(p. 1108) “Reverse the rain of Terror …”
Rocky Flats—Rockwell Corporation Nuclear Facility’s Plutonium Bomb trigger factory, near Boulder, Colorado. Starting in the late ’70s, the Author joined in many protests against the plant. In 1989 the FBI investigated the site, confirmed careless handling of radioactive materials, suspended activity there and subsequently shut it down, but only after a $2 billion failed attempt to get the plant back on line. Cleanup will continue into the next millennium.
(p. 1110) “Sending Message”
General Rios-Montt—Efrain Rios-Montt (b. 1926), Guatemalan dictator, rose to power in a 1982 coup lasting seventeen months. Claiming himself a “Born-Again” Christian reformer and backed by President Reagan, his campaigns were responsible for the destruction of native villages and the killing of tens of thousands of natives.
700 Club—Televangelist cable talk show, Christian Broadcasting Net-works’s Flagship program, founded by Pat Robertson.
(p. 1117) “Happy New Year Robert & June”
Robert & June—Robert Frank, June Lief.
(p. 1118) “Diamond Bells”
Hayagriva—One of the eight fierce protective deities, identified by a horse’s head in Tibetan Buddhist iconology
(p. 1120) “Waribashi”
See “Roots of Rain Forest Destruction,” Khor Kok Pen, Third World Resurgence, no. 4, December 1990 (Malaysia, Third World Network), paraphrased in The Debt Boomerang, Susan George, 1992 (London, Pluto Press with Transnational Institute).
(p. 1130) “Death & Fame”
Trungpa Vajracharya—Vajracharya: In Tibetan Buddhism, Mantrayanastyle meditation practice master. Trungpa: Chögyam Trungpa, Rinpoche (1939–1987), the Author’s first meditation master (1971–1987), founder of Naropa institute and Shambhala centers, author of Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism and First Thought Best Thought, with introduction by Allen Ginsberg, 1984, both published by Shambhala Publications, Boston.
Gelek Rinpoche—Kyabje or Ngawang Gelek Rinpoche (b. 1939), friend and teacher to the Author, he is the founder of Jewel Heart Tibetan Buddhist centers. A refugee in India since 1959, where he gave up monastic life to better serve the Tibetan Buddhist lay community, in the late ’70s he was directed by tutors to the Dalai Lama to begin teaching Western students. He currently resides in Ann Arbor, Michigan.
Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche—(b. 1962) The lineage holder of the Buddhist and Shambhala meditation traditions brought from Tibet by his father and teacher, Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche. He is the leader of the international Shambhala community based in Halifax, Nova Scotia.
Satchitananda Swami—Sri Swami Satchidananda, founder of Integral Yoga Institute. Came to the United States from India 1966.
Dehorahava Baba—A yogi the Author met at the Ganges River across from Benares in 1963.
Karmapa XVI—(1924–1981) Sixteenth lama head of Milarepa lineage, Kagupa order of Tibetan Buddhism.
Dudjom Rinpoche—(1904–1987) Former lama head of Nyingmapa “old school” Tibetan teachings, founded by Padmasambhava.
Katigiri Roshi—Dainin Katagiri-Roshi (1928–1990), first Abbot of the Minnesota Zen Meditation Center in Minneapolis. Came to the United States from Japan in 1963. Taught and practiced in California and also assisted Suzuki-roshi at the San Francisco Zen Center.
Suzuki Roshi—Shunryu Suzuki-roshi: Zen master of the Soto Lineage. Came to the United States in 1958 as head of the Japanese Soto sect in San Francisco, where he established a Zen Center. He built Zen Mountain Center at Tassajara Springs, the first Zen monastery in America. His Dharma heir is Richard Baker.
Baker Roshi—Richard Baker, Roshi, Abbot, head teacher, and founder of the Dharma Sangha centers, Crestone, Colorado, and Germany.
Whalen Roshi—Zenshin Philip Whalen (b. 1923), poet friend associated with the Beat Generation, now an ordained Zen Buddhist priest, he is Abbot of the Hartford Street Zen Center, San Francisco.
Daido Loori Roshi—John Daido Loori, Abbot of Zen Mountain Monastery in Mt. Tremper, New York, and the founder/director of the Mountains and Rivers Order. Master in Rinzai and Soto lines of Zen Buddhism. Dharma heir of Hakuyu Taizen Maezumi Roshi.
Kapleau Roshi—Philip Kapleau Roshi, Zen master, studied Zen in Japan, founded the Rochester Zen Center in 1966, author of many books on Zen practice.
Lama Tarchin—Nyingmapa school Tibetan Lama, founded the Vajrayana Foundation, Santa Cruz, California, at the request of HH Dudjom Rinpoche.
(p. 1133) “Sexual Abuse”
See article “Sexual Abuse Bill Targets Clergy,” Mark Mueller, Boston Herald (February 21, 1997).
(p. 1136) “Half Asleep”
Almora—Town in Uttar Pradesh state of Northern India, near the foothills of the Himalayas.
(p. 1151) “Thirty State Bummers”
Idi Amin—Idi Amin Dada Oumee (b. 1925), president and dictator of Uganda from 1971–1979, responsible for the killing of 300,000 tribal Ugandans.
General Mobutu—Joseph Mobutu (1930–1997), president and dictator of Zaire from 1965–1991, supported by Western powers.
Mr. Allende—Salvador Allende Gossens (1908–1973), Popularly elected Democratic Socialist President of Chile, overthrown by a military coup supported by the CIA.
Pinochet—Augusto Pinochet Ugarte (b. 1915), president of Chile following the death of Allende.
D’Aubuisson—Roberto D’Aubuisson Arrieta, Death Squad Leader of Arena Party in El Salvador.
Pat Robertson—Conservative Baptist minister and television talk show host who ran for president in 1988.
Rios-Montt—(See note, p. 108.)
Col. North—Oliver L. North, Jr. (b. 1943), U.S. Marine Colonel and a key figure in the Iran-Contra affair.
Aristide—Jean-Bertrand Aristide (b. 1951), the first democratically elected leader of Haiti from 1990–1991 and 1994–1995.
Cedras—Lt. Gen. Raoul Cedras, Haitian military ruler who overthrew Aristide in 1991.
Fujimori—Alberto Fujimori (b. 1938), president of Peru.
United Fruits—Corporation that controlled much of the Central American fruit market and now part of United Brands Company. United Fruit Company’s law firm, Sullivan and Cromwell, had employed State Secretary Dulles, whose brother, Allen, heading the CIA, coordinated the 1954 then-covert overthrow of Jacob Arbenz, elected president of Guatemala. The event is notorious throughout Latin America as a mid-twentieth-century example of “banana republic” repression by North American imperium. By 1980, the U.S.-trained Guatemalan military had reportedly killed 10 percent of jungle Indian population as part of a “pacification” program to “create a favorable business climate.” (See note: Rios-Montt.)
Mosaddeq—Mohammad Mosadd
eq (1880–1967), Democratically elected Iranian premier from 1951–1953 who nationalized Western oil holdings.
Pol Pot—(1928–1998), Prime Minister of Cambodia from 1976–1979 and former leader of the Khmer Rouge.
Sihanook—Norodom Sihanook, Prime Minister since 1955 and crowned king of Cambodia in 1993 for the second time.
(p. 1160) “Things I’ll Not Do (Nostalgias)”
Kashi—Known now as Benares, a city in northern India, mentioned in ancient Buddhist writings.
Manikarnika ghat—Benares, India; steps near the river where corpses are burned.
Jagganath, Lord—Lord Jagganath is the form under which the Hindu god Krishna is worshipped in Puri, a town in eastern India.
Birbhum—A district in West Bengal state, northeastern India, home of nineteenth-century holy fool, Khaki Baba (see below).
Khaki Baba—North Bengali (Birbhum area), nineteenth-century saint who, dressed in khaki loincloth, is pictured sometimes sitting surrounded by canine friends and protectors.
Collected Poems 1947-1997 Page 89