by London Casey
“What?” I asked.
“You’re in trouble,” Cody said. “You always get mushy when you’re in trouble. What happened? Who do I need to beat up? I have nothing to lose so I can go wild.”
“Goodbye, Cody,” I said. “I don’t have time for you right now.”
I hung up the phone and stood up.
I reached for the drawer where the ultrasound pictures were, but I stopped myself.
“No,” I said.
I didn’t need to see them again.
I needed to take action.
Take charge.
I needed to control something.
Maya appeared in my doorway, holding another folder.
I saw the small bump at the bottom of her shirt again.
I curled my lip.
“Get in here, Maya, we need to talk.”
I tossed the folder to the desk.
She just stood there, like nothing was wrong.
She’s playing her part. You gave her this part to play. That was the agreement. She was going to keep the pregnancy a secret the best she could. And when it was time to talk about it, she would just say it’s her business. Let everyone think what they wanted.
I couldn’t stop seeing the bump.
It was so small and subtle… but to me it could have been a watermelon under her shirt.
It was just more proof that this was really happening.
That our decision months ago was front and center on display.
Speaking of that… I was pissed that this deal was still lingering all this time later.
And then Cody calling me and trying to call me out…
“Your roommate,” I said to Maya. “She’s crazy.”
“Bev is something, yes. Why?”
“She just prints on shirts all day?”
“Yeah.”
“She makes a living at that?”
“I guess. I don’t know. Why?”
“The smell of the ink,” I said. “That was disgusting.”
“Yeah, it’s potent,” Maya said.
“It’s chemicals, Maya. Probably toxic.”
“I don’t know. I haven’t looked into it.”
I pointed to her stomach. “That’s my child in there.”
“I know,” she said, her cheeks turning red.
“I’m not going to let you hurt my child.”
“What?”
“You can’t be in that apartment anymore,” I said. Yes, yes, yes. I could control this. “You can’t. It’s not safe. Or healthy. I’ll call Dr. Haime right now if you want me to.”
“I never said… what is going on here?”
“Nothing is going on. I don’t want you or the baby smelling that stuff.”
“It’s where I live, Cole.”
“You’re moving.”
“Is that so?” Maya asked.
“Yeah,” I said. “I’ll find you a new place.”
“You’re finding me a place to live?”
“I’m paying for it, too. So, yeah, I’ll have final say in where it’s going to be.”
“Is this part of your hush plan with me?” Maya asked. “In case you didn’t see, I’m starting to show a little here.”
“Oh, I see it, Maya.”
“Yeah, thanks. I feel really attractive right now.”
I swallowed hard.
I thought she actually looked beautiful. She tried to wear a baggy shirt but it didn’t matter. Her belly was going to show no matter what.
“You need to go shopping for maternity clothes too then,” I said. “I’ll mark that down and give you a credit card.”
“Wow. I get a credit card too?”
“I told you I was going to take care of this.”
“This… as in your deep, dark secret?”
“I’ll let you know where the apartment is,” I said. “It’ll be fully furnished. Minus the nursery.”
“You’re just so good to me, Cole,” she said in a dry voice.
“I’m keeping to my word here, Maya. Give me a break.”
“You get a call from your brother and now you’re all protective of me. I see what’s going on.”
“And what’s that?” I asked.
“You can’t control your brother, so you want to control me.”
“I’m taking care of my unborn baby and that baby’s mother. Don’t look into it, Maya.”
“Yeah, sure,” she said. “Whatever you say. You just tell me where to live. How to live. What to wear. That’s just fine. I’m not allowed to tell anyone you got me pregnant. Who cares, right?”
“It’s not going to be like this for long,” I said.
“That’s what you said weeks ago.”
Maya turned and I hurried after her.
I gently spun her back around.
Her belly brushed against me and I stepped back.
“Can’t you just be spoiled rotten for right now and be happy with that?” I whispered.
“Fine,” Maya said. “Just make sure the apartment has a spot for me to write.”
“Three bedrooms in the city?” I asked. “Do you know how much that’s going to cost?”
“Am I worth it?” Maya whispered.
She looked beautiful. Kissable. Lovable.
She was pregnant with my baby.
Of course, she was fucking worth it.
She was slowly becoming worth everything.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Maya
I didn’t have much to my name, but what I did, most of it was still in boxes scattered throughout the new apartment. That meant maybe five boxes, tops. The rest of the apartment came already fully furnished. And as much as I tried to hate everything in the apartment, I kind of loved it.
My first complaint was the couch.
It looked bulky and annoying.
Hardly.
It was like sinking into a cloud.
And it pulled out into a bed.
Meaning I could have a little slumber party in the living room anytime I wanted.
Which I had done the last two nights because why not?
The floor plan was open.
It was like a giant studio apartment.
The wood floors looked old but they were new. The walls looked like cold stone but they weren’t cold at all.
It had such an old city vibe to it. The kind of place a writer like me would love to hole up in and write a bestseller. Truthfully, I wondered if Cole chose this place for that reason alone. If he did, that was kind of cool of him. Almost a tiny bit romantic.
Only almost though.
After all, he was still Cole.
Cockhead Cole was always in full swing at the office.
He got his own coffee a few times and then that went away.
I think he thought when the morning sickness calmed that meant I was suddenly comfortable and ready to go again. Which I wasn’t. I mean, yeah, it was great that I wasn’t throwing up every morning. I had no idea what changed in my body, but one morning I woke up and just didn’t get sick.
Cole texted me one night and said he had an apartment for me and some guys were coming to move me out of Bev’s apartment in two days.
Everything with Cole happened like that.
Fast.
I touched my belly and felt the bump.
Everything was fast with Cole…
Besides the couch, I tried to hate the TV. For no good reason. I tried to complain that the kitchen being open and part of the apartment was bad. It wasn’t. I tried to complain that the bedroom had too many windows, but every window had a curtain. And the windows faced west, so some nights I got to watch the sun set. And the wall next to the windows had a built-in desk so I got to sit there, type words, and watch the sun set.
It was perfect.
Face it… I loved the place.
I loved the look, the feel, the smell, everything.
Most of all, the apartment was quiet.
I could come home from the office, take a deep breath and do whatever I w
anted. If I wanted to strip naked just inside the door and have a naked night, I could.
Even though I didn’t do that - yet - it was still an option.
Take today.
I came home from work and wanted to cry.
It was just that kind of day.
I came into a silent apartment and walked right to the kitchen for a drink.
Of water.
Cole had fancy water bottles in the fridge for me to drink. I could definitely tell a difference compared to the water I normally drank.
Before I finished the bottle of water, there was a knock at the door.
The only small thing about the place that was weird… it was technically Cole’s. Meaning he knew where I was and he could come over whenever he wanted.
Although he usually just came into the apartment.
So who the hell was knocking?
I opened the door and saw a t-shirt.
BE
ROOM
EV
“Bev?” I asked.
The shirt lowered and Bev looked right at me. “Get it?”
“What?”
“The shirt.”
“Oh. No. I don’t get it.”
“Look again,” she said.
She lifted the shirt.
I shook my head. “I don’t…”
She lowered the shirt again. “Can I come into your guilt pad?”
“Guilt pad?” I asked.
“Yeah. You’re living like a wild one over here. You know that, right?”
Bev walked by me and I shut the door. “What are you talking about?”
“Oh, come on, Maya. This is amazing in here. And it’s all because Cole feels guilty. He wants to take care of you but he doesn’t know how to. So he’s going to flaunt money at you like crazy. Like this place. Look at it. Why does he need this place?”
“I told him what I wanted,” I said.
“You wanted to move out?”
“No,” I said. “Bev… it’s complicated. I thought we talked about all of this.”
“We did,” she said. “I’m just in awe every time I see this place. It’s like… hush money. He wants you silent about the baby, right?”
“It’s not that easy,” I said.
“Yes, it is,” she said. “Are you happy here?”
“Yeah,” I said. “I mean, it’s cozy. It feels like a place a writer would live. I have a place to write in the main bedroom. And then there’s two more bedrooms. It’s kind of unique, you know? It’s like a studio but it has rooms too…”
Bev looked around. “I’m being petty and jealous. I miss you.”
“Oh, Bev, I miss you too. It was just…”
“I know,” she said. “I’m busy, loud, and stinky.”
“You’re not stinky.”
“The ink is.”
“Well, yeah…”
Bev held up the shirt again. “You don’t get it?”
“It’s been a long day. And I think I have that pregnancy brain people talk about.”
“Sure,” Bev said. “It’s supposed to say Best Roommate Ever. But I cut the text in half. So this is your shirt. And then I wear the other. That one says… well, you can figure it out.”
“Bev, that’s awesome,” I said. “That’s a really cool idea.”
“You think?”
“Yeah. Thank you.”
She tossed me the shirt.
I looked at it and it finally made sense.
I smiled. “Seriously. Thank you.”
“So… let me ask you something.”
“Sure.”
“This is his place. That’s his baby inside you. What are you to him?”
“I’m his secretary.”
“That’s it?”
“For now, that’s it. It’s kind of hard to explain. I’m okay with it.”
“Are you sure?”
“Bev… what are you trying to get at?”
“Two things in mind. The bad thing. Is he just trying to control you? And you’re kind of stuck? Because that’s fucked up. You’re not out there parading around that you’re pregnant. This is a big deal. You’re having a baby. Now for the good thing… his place. His baby. Your body. Please tell me the whole fucking your boss thing is still happening.”
I swallowed hard.
That was a lot to take in at once.
“Uh… wow. That was…” I shook my head. “Cole and I have not been together since the night… this happened.”
I touched my stomach.
“What?” Bev asked. “You’re pregnant. You can’t get pregnant again. You could be having all the free sex in the world right now.”
I laughed. “If only it were that easy, Bev.”
“You need to call him out on that,” Bev said. “Tell him to get inside you.”
“I will keep that in mind,” I said. “Do you want a drink or order something to eat?”
“I shouldn’t,” Bev said. “I just wanted to say hey. Swing by for a second. I’m actually going out with someone.”
“Good for you,” I said.
“It’s nothing serious,” Bev said. “Just fun. Like you should be having.”
“I think I’ve had more than enough fun,” I said. I touched my stomach again. “I’m…”
I looked at Bev and swallowed.
I wasn’t going to unload on her. Not before a date. She needed to leave.
It was my fault I had nobody to talk to. Because I never said anything to anyone.
I never called my mother. Well, I did call her. Three times. She never answered. Without a voicemail, she would never call me back.
Connie and Jen… they had no idea I was pregnant.
That was my choice.
“Thank you for the shirt,” I said. “It’s the best one ever. My favorite.”
“You don’t like the one about getting pregnant by your boss?” Bev asked.
“Eh… that’s my second favorite.”
“What about the one with the potatoes having sex looking for oil to get kinky but they end up as fries?”
“Bev, you’re going to be late for your date,” I said.
“Shit. I am.”
She ran toward me and hugged me.
Then she crouched down and kissed my belly.
That made me gasp.
Nobody had done that yet.
When she left the apartment, I covered my mouth and my eyes filled with tears.
There were moments when it really hit me hard.
That I was really pregnant with my boss’s baby.
I couldn’t stop thinking about some of the stuff Bev said.
Sex? Sure. How could I not think about sex? I was a woman. I had needs. I wasn’t sure what the rules of society were for being pregnant and having sex with someone other than the baby’s father. At the same time, there was no reason why Cole and I…
“Nope,” I announced as I squirted honey into a cup of hot tea.
I wiped some off the rim of the cup and when I licked my finger, I felt something.
I shut my eyes, embarrassed that licking honey off my finger put me in the mood.
It had to have been the hormones.
At least I could have some self-care.
In fact…
A cup of hot tea, a candle, a hot shower… my fingers…
That all seemed like a good idea.
Only I thought about the other thing Bev talked about.
What was I to Cole?
Did he really care? Or was I just a pawn?
Like he wanted to keep a sense of power over me… but I was the one with the power over him…
I called him.
“Maya.”
“Cole.”
“Are you okay?”
“I don’t know. Can I ask you something?”
“Okay…”
“What is this between us?” I asked. “You’re hiding me, right? You’re keeping me under your control. Because I’m pregnant with your baby. I want to tell people I’m pregnant, but I don’
t know what to say. Or how to say it. If I just play it off that it’s some random guy’s baby, I look like… what? Someone that foolishly sleeps around?”
“Maya, you really want to do this now?” Cole asked.
“I don’t know. Maybe. It’s on my mind. I’m in this apartment, alone, and I just-”
“Cole, baby, what are you doing still working?”
The icy, bitchy voice cut through me.
I laughed.
“You’re out with someone?” I asked.
“Maya, listen to me…”
“Goodbye, Cole,” I said.
I hung up on him.
He was hiding me in an apartment because I was pregnant, while he was out on a date?
Screw. That.
Rage filled my body and I rushed to the bathroom.
Before I knew what I was doing, I took my shirt off and threw it to the floor.
Next was my bra.
I left my hot tea on the kitchen counter.
I had a new plan.
I was going to shower, clean up, and go out myself.
Take that, Cole.
I hung my bra on the towel rack and I turned and gasped when I saw myself in the mirror.
The baby bump was more than a bump now.
I hadn’t looked at myself in the mirror lately.
It was there. Profound. Far from the ready to pop look but there was no way to hide it without a shirt on.
And then my boobs… holy hell…
They were tender, swollen, bigger.
Even my nipples looked different. Instead of being pink and perky, they were thicker.
My body was changing.
My body was going to keep changing.
I was as excited as much as I was scared.
But for tonight… I had a plan in mind.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Cole
I swirled the whiskey in the glass.
Next to me Chrissy talked about the law firm she worked at. She was running through every single person that worked there. Under normal circumstances, I would have been eating that up. Staring at her. Listening to her. That’s all she wanted. Attention. And that would result in her giving me her private attention in a little while.
I had been out for a drink with Jackson, Liam, and Lincoln.
Just to catch up on life.