Surprisingly, Ben did not seem to mind that I was clinging to him tight. Ben was over a foot taller than I, so my head hit just below his chest. I pushed my head into his chest and it felt as if electricity was being jolted into my brain. Euphoric feelings of happiness danced through my mind as bolts of energy exploded through my veins. Holding him was addicting and I didn’t want to let go.
Finally, after what seemed like several minutes, I could feel him pulling away. I was so embarrassed for embracing him so intensely. My face turned red and I looked down at my feet. The two of us were completely silent for sometime, before I finally gathered my courage and said, “I don’t understand what is happening?”
He looked concerned, “What do you mean?”
“Your touch is...” I could feel my cheeks turning warm again, but I said, “I don’t know Ben…addicting. At first it’s just a jolt, and it freaks me out a little, but the longer I hold on...the more it intensifies and feels...euphoric. I don’t know any other way to explain.”
Ben softly reached out and caressed my arm. Once more I felt the immediate jolt before warmth took its place. It felt as if rays of sun were shooting down and embracing my skin. As his fingers grazed my arm, it felt like fireworks were penetrating my skin and sparkling down my nerves. The feeling overwhelmed my body and I collapsed into his embrace. Once more he held me in his arms as I felt an overwhelming sensation of happiness and excitement trickle through my brain.
After moments of his embrace, I felt an overwhelming urge to kiss him. His lips were only inches from mine and I could smell their sweet scent as I inhaled. I lifted my head and looked into his dazzling blue eyes. They mesmerized me in their gaze. I gently placed my hand around his neck and pulled his face down towards mine. I was shocked by my own actions.
In just seconds, his lips were only centimeters away from mine. As they inched closer, I could feel energy radiating from his lips with each breath he took. It was as if I was absorbing his energy through every breath. As we moved closer, it felt as if his lips were magnetic to mine. With our lips almost touching, I stood still, in fear of my own actions.
He could sense my shyness, so he pulled me in until our lips touched. His lips gently grazed mine, and a burst of energy shot through my body. The energy shocked me as it was even more energizing than the touch of his hands, but it felt amazing. I wanted more, so I kissed his lips again, even harder this time. The energy made me feel out of control. Power and energy was bursting through every vein, powering my soul. It felt as if every molecule in my body was being powered and restored.
When I had kissed Damon, I felt a sense of chemistry in his touch, but kissing Ben was like nothing I had ever felt in my life. I was completely entranced by him and his body.
As we continued to kiss passionately, there was an unexpected knock on the door. The sudden noise jolted me back to reality and I quickly pulled away from Ben’s embrace. As I pulled away, I felt embarrassed by my impulsive move, but Ben looked enchanted as he stared at me with intense desire. Without saying a word, I went to the door and opened it. It was Damon.
The moment I saw Damon, a tremendous amount of guilt washed through my mind. The moment he saw me, he smiled and his eyes caught fire.
As he stepped inside the house, panic whirled through my mind. I had to lie, “I’m sorry Damon, I’m really feeling bad today. I think I am going to rest.”
“No problem! I can keep you company. We can watch a movie or something. I am free today and I thought Ben might like a day off.”
“But…uh,” I was out of excuses so I said, “Okay.”
“Head upstairs,” Damon said, “I will let Ben know he can head home.”
“Oh,” I said, “Ben is staying with us for awhile.”
Damon had a twisted look on his face, but then smiled, “I’ll let him know I’m here.”
“He’s in the kitchen,” I said. I placed my hand over my mouth in apprehension and headed up the stairs. I was in a big mess.
When I entered my room, I laid down in my bed. After my kiss with Ben, I had a great deal of energy, but I had to pretend to be sick, or Damon would be suspicious. Damon entered my room only moments later. He sat down next to me on my bed and began to rub my shoulders. I felt so ashamed of myself. I had promised I would give Damon a chance at a relationship, but only moments ago I was passionately kissing Ben.
I cared deeply for Damon and loved him like he was family, but I was extremely attracted to Ben. Ben was not only physically attractive, but he was kind and tenderhearted. The two of us could talk about anything, or sit quietly and say nothing at all. Damon and I had been friends since we were babies and I loved him as long as I could remember. I was confused by my feelings for both of them, and I didn’t know what to do.
“I wouldn’t mind being alone,” I said softly as Damon rubbed my shoulders.
“Are you sure? Would you like a glass of water? Damon asked.
“I’m okay, I just need some rest.”
He kissed me on the forehead and left my room. So many feelings were racing through my mind. Ben was stuck in my head, the way his lips felt against mine, and the way his skin caressed mine. It was like a magical drug and I wanted more. But the more I thought about Ben, the more guilt I felt for Damon. I was lost.
I was bored as I lay in bed playing sick. I was full of energy and felt a burning desire for Ben’s touch. Every molecule in my body wanted to run to Ben and kiss him more, but I didn’t want to hurt Damon. I had energy bursting through my body and laying still was driving me insane. I looked around my room for something to occupy my mind. I began to think about the fairy magic I had just discovered—fire.
I was looking forward to learning more about being a fairy and digging into my power. I was clueless about what being a fire fairy meant. As I thought about my magic, I decided, maybe I could talk to Damon about it. I sat up and called Damon into the room.
“I think I am feeling better,” I said.
Damon smiled and sat down on my bed once more.
“Can I talk to you?” I asked.
“You can always talk to me.” he replied.
“What do you know about fairies of fire?”
He smiled and said, “I don’t know much. My mother has mostly taught me about ice fairies, so I know very little about dark fairies. I do know that being a dark fairy can be burdensome.”
“Everyone says that, but what does that mean.”
He thought for a moment, “I don’t know much, but what I do know, is the dark fairies magic is the most powerful of all fairies. Not only is it the most powerful, but the most dangerous. But your powers can do great things.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know much Miranda. Addison and Ayden know the most about fairies. My mom could even help you.”
“I appreciate it,” I said with a smile on my face. “Do you know of any easy spells you could show me?”
“Are you sure you’re feeling up to it?” he asked.
“I’m okay. I just had a headache, but I’m feeling better now.” I lied.
He had a giant grin on his face. “Okay, stand up.”
I stood up.
“Hold your hand out,” he directed. I held out my hand and he continued, “Close your eyes and clear your mind. Don’t think about anything at all.”
I shut my eyes and tried to clear my mind. As soon as I turned my thoughts off, he said, “Now, feel the magic in your hand. Believe it is there.”
As he spoke, I did everything he said. I pictured holding magic in my hand.
“Keep going. Keep picturing all your magic in the palm of your hand.”
I tried so hard, I kept imagining all of my magic in my hand, but I felt nothing. I didn’t even understand what magic felt like. Finally after minutes of silence and trying hard to produce magic, I gave up.
“I think it would be best if you start by meditating twenty minutes each day,” Damon said. “I’ve been exposed to magic my entire life. This is brand new for y
ou.”
“Okay,” I said feeling very disappointed.
“Just spend time quieting your mind each day. I know my mom will help you if you just ask.”
I smiled, “Thanks Damon.”
Damon and I spent the remainder of the evening watching movies and relaxing upstairs. I felt pangs of guilt each time he put his arm around me or kissed me. He tried to do more, but I pulled away each time.
Finally he said, “Is everything okay?”
“My head still hurts a little,” I lied.
“I understand,” he said as he gently massaged it, trying to make me feel better.
Finally, it was starting to get late and I couldn’t handle the guilt anymore. “I’m tried,” I said as I stood up.
Damon stood up and headed towards my room.
“Damon,” I called to him without moving.
“Yeah?”
“You can go home tonight. Ben’s here and I think I want to be alone tonight.”
Damon frowned and I could see hurt in his eyes as he said, “Is everything okay?”
“It’s just my head. It’s been hurting off and on all day.”
Damon looked upset, but said, “I hope you feel better Babe.” He gently rubbed my forehead and kissed it.
I walked him to the door and before he left, he embraced me and kissed me on the lips. His kiss was full of passion and warmth, but I felt none of the jolts or sensations that Ben had given me. As Damon kissed me, feelings of uncontrollable guilt projected through my mind. I just wanted the kiss to end, and I wanted Damon to leave. Finally he left, and I felt a strong sense of relief.
My father still hadn’t returned home and I was unsure where Ben had gone. He had been on my mind the entire day and I wanted to see him again. I walked up the stairs and knocked on Ben’s bedroom door. After a few moments, Ben answered. He looked like he was getting ready for bed as he was wearing gym shorts with no shirt. His muscular body mesmerized me and I wasn’t sure what to say, so I stepped in his room.
“Is everything okay?” Ben asked.
“Yes,” I said quietly as my cheeks turned pink and I looked at my feet.
“Do you want to talk about earlier?” he asked, looking concerned.
My body ached as I craved his touch, but I felt shy and embarrassed to make a move. I didn’t want to talk. I wanted to taste his mouth against mine once more, but I was too shy so I stood there looking at my feet.
“Miranda, are you okay?” Ben asked again when I did not reply.
“I’m okay,” I said softly.
Ben looked at me blankly, not knowing what to do or say.
I had to say something or walk away, so I looked down and said just above a whisper, “I want you to kiss me again.”
He didn’t hesitate as he slowly walked towards me and leaned down to reach my face. He softly placed his hand behind my head and pulled my face into his. Once more our lips touched and I felt bolts of excitement and warmth shoot into my body. As we kissed, it seemed as if he was just as addicted to me as I was to him.
As we continued to kiss, I could feel his passion for me through the energy igniting my body. I wanted him to know what I was feeling, and I knew the only way for him to feel the intenseness of our touch was for him to drink my blood.
Although I wanted to keep kissing, I briefly pulled away from his kiss and I offered my wrist to him once more. He looked concerned and shook his head.
“I want you to know how I feel,” I said shyly. “It’s the only way.”
“I’m scared,” he said. “I don’t want to hurt you...and I may not be able to control my desire for you. I care for you Miranda.”
“I’m not scared,” I said as I looked up to him.
Instead of taking my wrist, he picked me up and carried me to the bed. He gently laid me down, then laid down next to me. He leaned over towards me and brushed my hair from my neck. He stared at my neck as he took his hand and gently rubbed my skin. He seemed extremely nervous as he leaned his face in. I shut my eyes, waiting for the pain of his fangs, but instead I felt his lips embrace my skin. It sent chills down my spine and fulfilled me with more energy. I had never been kissed this way before. I moaned in pleasure as his lips traced my skin.
“I can’t,” he whispered in my ear.
“It’s okay,” I quietly replied.
He continued gently kissing my neck. Finally after filling me with energy and pleasure by his kiss, he gently opened his jaw and sunk his fangs into my neck. Profuse pain was immediately jolted through my body, but within seconds the pain turned to extreme pleasure. His bite was like nothing I had ever felt, it brought more pleasure than our kiss. Once my skin was pierced, he hesitated momentary before I finally felt his lips softly drinking my blood. He only took a few small sips, but my blood energized him and gave him great pleasure. I heard him moan as my blood oozed into his mouth. As my blood gave him power, I could feel those powers reenter my body. It was like a circle of energy, darting from his body to mine and back to him through my blood.
He pulled away from my neck and I could taste my own blood as he kissed my lips once more. As he kissed me with great passion, I felt his hands softly caressing my stomach and sides. After only a few moments, I could feel his hands against my bare skin. I trembled from the sensation. The pleasure of his touch was indescribable.
Finally he lifted my shirt over my head exposing my skin to the air. He looked at me for a few moments, taking me in. I could feel the blood from my neck slowly dripping down my chest and starting to dry, but I didn’t mind. I could tell my blood was turning him on as he licked the blood off of me. When the blood was gone, he gently kissed my bare stomach. The feeling of his lips on my skin sent sparks throughout my entire body. The more he kissed and touched me, the more euphoric I felt. I felt as if I completely belonged to him and he belonged to me.
I trembled as he unbuttoned my jeans and pulled them off of me. Then he pulled off his shorts. The two of us were wearing nothing but our underwear. He once more climbed above me and kissed me hard. I could feel his skin touching mine, and as he balanced himself above me, I felt one of his hands reaching down my stomach.
Finally he removed the remainder of our underclothes and the two of us lay naked on the bed. My heart was racing as I could feel the heat and energy bounce from his body to mine. He lay next to me on the bed as he leaned over and bit my neck once more. He took a few more drinks this time, then climbed on top of me. As he lowered himself onto me, I could feel that he was very turned on and was ready to fulfill his desire. Just as I felt his naked body ascend above mine, I felt my virginity slipping away once more, and I panicked.
“Wait!” I cried.
As he jumped off of me, the energy between the two of us quickly disappeared.
“I’m so sorry!” he panicked, “I didn’t mean to...it’s your blood. I know exactly how you feel now, I feel it too...I shouldn’t—”
“It’s not you,” I interrupted. “I’ve never done this.”
His face turned red, “You mean, you’ve never had sex?”
My face turned red, “I’m a virgin.”
“Oh my God!” he cried as he threw his hands on his forehead, “I’m sorry...if I knew…I have no control...oh God!”
“It’s not your fault. I wanted this too.”
“It is though,” he said as he threw his hand across his forehead and began rubbing his temples. “I’m a gentleman...and your father trusted me…I’m supposed to be protecting you. I’m taking advantage of you...oh God. I’m so sorry….”
“But I want you!” I cried. I wanted his touch so bad, I wanted to fulfill his desires and I wanted him to fulfill mine. I wanted to make love with him, but it was too late. My fear ruined it. I looked down as a small tear fell from my eye and I said very quietly, “I want you so much.”
It seemed as if he didn’t hear me as he grabbed a blanket from the foot of the bed and quickly covered me up. Then he crawled underneath the covers and snuggled next to me. As I felt h
is warm naked body against mine, I felt so embarrassed by the way I was acting. The power of our touch and kiss was indescribable. I craved so much more, but I had freaked out and ruined a perfect moment. As I lay there feeling ashamed, I didn’t realize how exhausted I was and I suddenly fell asleep.
The next morning, I bolted awake. I had fallen asleep in Ben’s room at my father’s house. I was also supposed to be at the mansion by seven. I looked over at the alarm and saw it was seven fifteen. Ben was sleeping peacefully next to me. I shot out of bed and peeped out the door to make sure my father was not nearby. When I saw no one around, I ran up the stairs to my room. I quickly dressed and headed out the door. I reached the mansion at seven twenty-five. I knew my father would be furious. I raced into Maria’s office. My father, Brandon and Maria were sitting, waiting for me.
“Is everything okay?” my father asked.
“I’m so sorry, I have been exhausted. I slept in, I am so sorry.”
“It is okay,” Maria said, “But when you become Queen, it is extremely important that you are punctual. The town is counting on you.”
I felt awful. I had let everyone down and lied. I didn’t know what was becoming of me.
The remainder of the week was just as overwhelming as the previous had been, but each night I was able to go home and see Ben. Although things never went as far as they had on the Sunday before, the two of us spent a lot of time kissing and spending time with one another. He refused to drink anymore of my blood, and instead continued drinking animal blood.
I had avoided Damon all week, but when he stopped by one day, my guilt became too much. I was upstairs in my sitting room with Ben reading a book, when the doorbell rang. I heard my dad answer the door.
“Miranda! Damon’s here,” my father yelled from the first floor.
When I reached the bottom floor, I saw Damon standing in the doorway with a big smile on his face. “Can we talk?” he asked.
“Sure,” I said. Damon began heading up the stairs. I froze.
“Can we talk in the parlor?” I asked.
Damon gave me a funny look as we never sat in the parlor, “I wouldn’t mind some privacy,” he said and continued up the stairs.
The Portal to Sidhe: Book 1 Page 7