“I’m talking about Thomas.”
David shot to his feet. “Did he do this to you?”
Dane was surprised by the reaction. She’d expected him to be upset with her, but his reaction was more protective than angry.
“No, this wasn’t him.”
David stared at her. “But you have talked to him.”
She nodded.
Her father returned to his seat. His hands were shaking. She’d never seen him like this. “I’d like to hear it from you. I won’t know what the truth is until I hear it from you.”
“The truth.” He shook his head. “We left there for a reason. We raised you away from there for a reason. Why couldn’t you just respect that?” David looked like he wanted to climb out of his own skin. He opened his door and instructed Charlotte to hold his calls and not to let anyone disturb him.
He walked to the bar and poured himself a drink, then reached for another glass and added one for her.
His hand shook as he handed her the glass. “You’ll want this.”
Dane took the drink and braced herself for the truth.
“Your mother and I were barely more than kids when we met. I’d never been in love, but I knew the moment I saw her, that was what it was. From that moment on she became my world. We planned to leave Jellico and go off to college together. Her family had other ideas. They didn’t like her seeing me. They thought because my parents were not from there that I wasn’t worthy of her. They tried to keep us apart, but nothing worked. We always found a way.”
His eyes took on a dreamy faraway look, and Dane imagined he was right back there as if he was sitting in that booth next to her mother.
“You and Thomas didn’t get along.”
David took a drink. “No. Thomas thought he owned your mother. He got out of control. Jenny was afraid of him. He was a beast.”
Dane stared at her father. “He raped her.”
David shut his eyes, the pain written in the lines of his face. He nodded. “I had already left for the city to get us a place to stay and get a job. I was to pick her up that weekend, so we could go away together. As soon as she called me, I came for her. We knew we had to get her out of there. We knew he’d kill her before he would let her go.”
“Why didn’t you go to the police?”
David laughed. “You’ve been there. Do you really think that forty years ago they would have done anything? They probably would have handed her over to him. She wasn’t even eighteen. They would have seen her as a runaway, and I would have been the one trying to steal her. No one would take the side of a young girl trying to run away from home.”
“When did you stop loving her?”
David flinched. “What?” He set the glass down hard on the table between them. “I never stopped loving your mother.”
“What happened then?”
David shook his head.
“It was me, wasn’t it? You couldn’t bear to look at me. I was the constant reminder of what Thomas had done to her.”
David frowned. “What are you talking about? Why would you remind us of Thomas? Your mother and I couldn’t wait to have you.”
Dane shook her head. “That’s not how I remember it.”
“What are you getting at, Dane?”
Dane drank her whiskey in one swallow. “I need to know. Are you my father?”
David looked confused, but then realization hit him. He rubbed his hand across his chin. “Look, Dane, I know I haven’t been a good father, but I wanted to provide for you and your mother. I worked a lot. I wasn’t around as much as I should have been. When she got sick, I didn’t know how to handle it. I failed her. I couldn’t protect her all those years before, and I couldn’t save her from cancer. I didn’t know any other way to raise you but to give you what you needed to be strong and make it on your own.”
“Is that what you call it? You married Christine not even a year after Mom died. I was treated like a trespasser in my own home. You let that woman degrade my mother’s memory. I couldn’t even talk about her. You taught me how to be on my own, all right. You taught me that I had no one.”
“You weren’t the only one who lost her,” David said, his voice raised in anger. “I loved your mother. You have no idea what it was like to lose that.” Dane hadn’t considered what her mother’s illness must have been like for her father if he had been in love with her. But that didn’t change the one question she needed answered.
“Are you my biological father?”
David looked her in the eye. “Why are you asking me that?”
“I met with Thomas. He was under the impression that he is my father.”
“Son of a bitch.” David slapped his hand down on the table. “Listen to me, Dane. You are my daughter and I am your father. That piece of shit will say and do anything he can to hurt me.”
“How do you know?”
He shook his head. “I know because your mother didn’t get pregnant until six months after we ran off together. Not that any of that would matter. You are my daughter.” He punctuated each word by driving his index finger against the table. “This is precisely the kind of thing we wanted to protect you from. Jenny never wanted her family to be able to hurt you. That’s why she shut them all out.”
Dane took in every word her father said. She had no reason to doubt him.
“You understand why we never told you. Who wants to keep a memory like that alive?”
Dane thought about everything he had said. “Thank you for telling me now.” She thought about all the old hurts, the wedge that had been driven between them. “If you loved her, why did you get married so soon after she died?”
David took a deep breath. “I’m sorry about that. I know what you must think.”
“Why did you do it?”
“It wasn’t like that, Dane. I didn’t know what to do. I was so lost and hurt. I didn’t know how to raise a kid on my own. And I didn’t know how to be alone. Your mother’s illness, her death was more than I could handle.”
“I spent four years trapped in that house with a woman I hated. Don’t tell me you married her for me.”
David shook his head. “No. No, you’re right. I can’t explain to you what it was like loving your mother. I just knew I’d never have that with anyone else. I never tried to replace her. I was just trying to figure out how to live without her. I’m sorry.”
Dane looked into her father’s eyes and wondered why he never just talked to her. “Why now? For years you wouldn’t talk to me. Why now?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know. There was just something in your eyes when you walked in here. I was caught off guard. You look so hurt. You didn’t really give me much choice. You’ve made me realize a lot of things.”
“Like?”
“Like I’ve missed you. I can see things have been bad for you, and I wasn’t there. I suppose it was time.”
Dane had tears in her eyes, but she wouldn’t let them fall.
David poured them another drink. “Now. Do you want to tell me what happened to you?”
Dane took the glass. “It’s a long story.”
He sat back against the sofa and rested his glass on his thigh as if he had all the time in the world. “I’m listening.”
Chapter Eighteen
“Where are you? How is your shoulder?” Emma’s voice sounded weary and guarded through the phone.
“It hurts like a son of a bitch, but it’s getting better. I’m in Knoxville. I have some things I needed to work on here before I go back to New York.”
“How long before you start physical therapy?”
Dane sighed. “It will be a while. The scapula isn’t mending as fast as I had hoped.”
“Will you do that in New York?”
“No. I don’t think so. I’m not sure when I’ll be able to travel.”
“Oh.”
Dane heard the disappointment in Emma’s voice. “How’s everything going there?” Dane asked, wanting to change the subject. It
was hard to talk to Emma on the phone. It was almost like talking to a stranger. She had trouble reading Emma when she couldn’t see her eyes.
“Everyone has been great. Paul and Sue have been helping at the bar. Curtis and his girlfriend are spending a lot of time together, so that gets him out of my hair. I had the old house cleared away and I’ve started thinking about rebuilding. I think if I do rebuild, I want to move to a different spot on the property. Maybe a smaller place that won’t be so much work. Oh, and the sheriff isn’t going to pursue charges against Curtis. So that’s at least one worry off my plate.”
Dane closed her eyes. She knew she was adding to Emma’s worry. “That’s great news. When I get back, you can show me everything you’ve done.”
Emma didn’t respond right away. “Are you sure you’re coming back?”
Dane sighed. “I made a promise, didn’t I?”
“I know. But things change.”
Emma was right. A lot had changed already. She missed Emma, but she had no idea how they would make a relationship work. Other than Emma, there wasn’t anything for her in Jellico.
“We’ll figure this out.”
Emma sighed. “I need to go. Will you call tomorrow?”
“Yeah, I’ll talk to you then.”
Dane hung up the phone, feeling strangely disconnected. Emma had been the first person in her life to make her feel like she belonged. That all seemed like a dream now. Each time they talked, it was as if she could feel that dream slipping away.
* * *
Dane woke to a strange buzzing sound. She opened her eyes, not recognizing the room. She blinked, then remembered her father dropping her off at the apartment he kept downtown. The buzzing continued, and she struggled to her feet to answer the door. A young man in a black leather jacket, jeans, and motorcycle boots stood at the door.
“Can I help you?”
“Mr. Foster sent me.”
Dane nodded and opened the door, motioning for the young man to come inside.
“My name is Adam.”
Dane checked her watch, marveling at how fast her father worked.
Adam placed an envelope on the sofa table before pulling a laptop from his bag.
“How long have you worked for my father?” Dane asked, curious.
Adam looked unfazed by the question. “I’ve done a few things for him over the last couple of years. I’m good at finding things. He told me to tell you everything you requested has been arranged.”
“That was fast.”
The young man smiled. “Shall we get started?”
Dane stared at the computer screen. She didn’t know how he did it, but in a matter of hours Adam had managed to compile everything she could ever want to know about Thomas Stewart and the slew of children he had produced, with detailed criminal records for each. She was sure her father was eager to present her with more proof that her mother’s family was not worth her trouble.
Dane blew out her breath as she read over some of the offenses they had amassed over the years. “Damn, some people really shouldn’t breed.”
Adam laughed. “No kidding.”
“You’re really good at this.”
“Thanks.” He turned his attention to a file compiling her complete family genogram. She now had more information than she ever could have imagined for both sides of her family.
Adam printed out the last reports and shut down the computer. “Is that all you need?”
“Yes. I think that’s it.”
He glanced to the bandages on Dane’s arm. “Mr. Foster filled me in on the situation. Looks like I don’t need to warn you about these people and the kinds of things they’re into.”
Dane lifted her bandaged arm in acknowledgment. “Trust me, I’ve had my fill of playing the hero. I just want to get enough information to the authorities to put all of these guys out of business.”
Adam reached into his bag and pulled out a black pouch. He unzipped the bag, revealing a 9 mm handgun.
Dane stared at the gun.
“Do you know how to use this?” he asked.
She nodded. “Yeah. But that doesn’t mean I want to.”
He zipped the bag closed. “Mr. Foster wanted to make sure you could protect yourself.” He patted the bag. “Your registration and carry permit are inside.” He stood, and Dane followed him to the door.
“What about your computer?”
He shrugged. “A gift from you father. He said you needed one.” Adam stopped at the door. “Be careful.” He handed her his card. “Let me know if there’s anything else you need.”
She shook his hand. “I will. Thanks again.”
Dane closed the door and stood with her back against the wall. She felt like she was in the twilight zone. She hated feeling vulnerable. She dialed her father’s number.
“Did you get what you needed?” he said the moment he answered.
“I did. Thank you.”
“Listen, I know you have a lot to do, but I’d like you to have dinner with me.”
She frowned. What else was there to say? She thought about it for a long moment and decided she had nothing to lose. “I’d like that.” She hadn’t had a relationship with her father in years, but he had come through for her in force. He’d treated this like a business transaction, and everything was in place. She hadn’t expected anything else from him after their confrontation. She hoped when this was over, they would have a chance to get to know each other.
“I’m downstairs now. I’ll be up in a minute.”
Dane raised her eyebrows in surprise. “Really?”
“You have that doctor’s appointment. I thought I’d drive you.”
For the first time since losing her mother, her father was acting like he actually gave a damn. They still had a long way to go, but it was a start.
* * *
Dane watched her father’s hands as he cut into his steak. She watched the way he kicked one foot behind his chair as he sat forward when he talked. Movements she knew she mirrored in her own behavior without even thinking. There were so many things about him she had never been willing to see because she had been so caught up in not wanting to be like him. She found these simple gestures comforting now. At least he wasn’t Thomas Stewart.
“So,” he said as she took a bite of his steak, “tell me more about this woman you met. Ann’s daughter.”
“Emma,” Dane said reverently as if just saying her name could somehow summon her.
“Sounds serious.”
Dane shook her head. “I don’t know. The first time she met me, she told me I was trouble. She was right.”
David picked up his wine and took a drink. “What is that supposed to mean? Do you think you’re the only person guilty of making a mistake? Sounds like you need to lose this self-imposed guilt trip before you lose the girl.”
Dane shook her head. “It’s more complicated than that.”
David sat back in his chair and watched her. “I wasted a lot of time when your mother was alive doing what I thought was best. I’ve spent years wishing I could get that time back. Don’t overthink this, Dane. Get out of your head and follow your heart.”
She met his eyes, wanting to see the truth there when she said her next words. “Even if that means I have to go back to Jellico?”
Something sad passed behind his eyes and she knew he was thinking of her mother.
“Jellico is just a place. Don’t let a place get in the way of what you want. You’re healing well, and you’ll be able to travel soon—maybe it’s time we put your plan in action. You can finish your therapy in Jellico if that’s where you decide to stay.”
“I’m scared,” she admitted.
“Of what?”
Dane swirled the wine around in her glass, not certain how to answer. “Emma doesn’t believe I’ll come back. I left her there to deal with the fallout all by herself. What if she doesn’t want the same thing I want? I can’t see myself settling down in a place like Jellico, but I can’t imagine anything
else without her.”
“You won’t know until you see her. Have you talked to her?”
Dane nodded. “Yeah. But every time I call, I feel like she’s worlds away. I don’t know what to say. She thinks my life is too different from hers.”
“That’s just semantics. Little details to be worked out. What else is troubling you?”
Dane sighed. “In this condition, I can’t protect myself, let alone anyone else.”
“The sling comes off next week.”
Dane nodded.
“If you love her, you have to try. Trust me, Dane—love isn’t an easy thing to find. If you are waiting for life to be perfect or easy, that isn’t going to happen. Love is something you have to fight for.”
Dane sat back in her chair, studying her father.
“What?” he asked, narrowing his eyes.
“I was just thinking about how things could have been different with us.”
He nodded. “I’m sorry about that. But I’m going to do better now.”
Dane smiled, believing him. “Me too.”
She knew they had a lot to work through, but she wanted to know him. She had gone to Jellico to learn about her mother, but in the end, it was her father she was getting to know. And he was right about one thing—she had left Emma waiting long enough. She was worth fighting for.
Chapter Nineteen
Emma looked up from the box she had just pulled out of storage when she heard music playing in the bar.
What now? “We’re not open,” she called as she pushed the door open with her foot. She stopped suddenly and almost dropped the new bottle of whiskey she was carrying when she saw Dane sitting at the bar. Something in her heart mended itself at the sight of her. She hadn’t heard from Dane in days, and when they had talked, Dane hadn’t said anything about coming back.
“Hello, beautiful. What do I have to do to get a drink around here?”
Emma smiled. Her heart felt lighter than it had in weeks. Dane looked good. Her burns had healed, she’d gotten a haircut and new clothes, and the bandages were gone, and so was the sling. She looked like Emma imagined her in her other life. She no longer had the appearance of someone trying to fit in. She looked like someone who owned who they were without apologies to anyone. She was a sight for sore eyes. “What would you like?”
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