She points to the open door. “No boys!”
Twenty
It’s been one of the best weeks of my life, and one of the hardest. Nana has argued with me at every turn. Each time I bring something in to the house she tries to make me take it back. When I get home from work, some of my stuff has been moved to the garage and I have to bring it back in. It’s worse than when I was removing things from my room and she was putting them back. I’ve taken to locking my room when I’m not there. I can’t keep moving in the same stuff day after day because she doesn’t understand that I’m trying to take up permanent residence in the house.
All that’s left in my apartment are enough clothes for a week, makeup, toiletries and what I need to get by. I’m pretty much only sleeping in there. During the day I’m at school and in the evenings I’m with Nana. Unless Cole has the day off and then we usually do something together, even if it is hanging out with Nana and keeping an eye on her. She’s fine with that, as long as he isn’t in my room. As the wedding is this weekend, I’m not making the final move until the following weekend. I’ll be turning in my apartment keys with a few weeks to spare.
We left Nana’s earlier tonight to spend some time together. He has to work tomorrow and the next two days are filled with wedding stuff. I probably won’t see him until the reception. We’re not talking much. I’m working and he’s watching the game, but it’s pleasant, comfortable and really nice. Now, if only I could find more scholarships, grants and the right colleges for the kids.
“You’re sighing a lot. What are you working on?”
I didn’t realize I was disturbing him. “We really aren’t supposed to talk about the kids at Baxter.”
“I already know about the kids at Baxter,” he reminds me.
“You don’t know specifics.” I shouldn’t tell him anything. “I probably shouldn’t have told you about the fashion design or how the kids get there.”
“I promise never to say anything. Just be general. I’m really interested in what you do.”
I study him. It would be nice to discuss some of the problems I’m having. I don’t have to say any names or give specifics. “Really?”
“Really!” Cole clicks off the television and now I really feel bad.
“No, watch your game.”
He turns more fully toward me. “I’d rather watch and listen to you.”
My face heats. I get so fucking embarrassed when he’s like that. I’m not used to being treated this way. “I have a student who wants to be a chef. The problem is, she can’t even boil water.”
“How does she even know if she’ll like to cook?”
“Good point,” I chuckle. “It’s all about nutrition for her, and a few others. They want to eat to be healthy, prepare their own meals, and control what goes into their body to lessen the triggers.”
“Triggers?’
“Eating disorder. She knows she’s always going to have one because it’ll never go away, but she wants to face it head on and control it and not let food control her. She isn’t sure if she wants to work in a restaurant one day, just that this is something she needs to do. If she can’t do that, she’s interested in becoming a dietician.”
“So, you know why the kids are at Baxter.”
“Only if they tell me, and I don’t ask. She volunteered the information. She’s about the only one who has.”
“They don’t have culinary arts there, do they?”
“No and probably because it’s too easy to get hurt, or intentionally hurt yourself or someone else.”
“But I thought these kids would be with families now, if Baxter didn’t exist. They could hurt or be hurt just as easily at home and probably wouldn’t have near the same supervision.”
“That’s the argument I intend to use when I meet with Mag.”
“Is she in charge of the programs?”
“Yes, and no. She sits on the board that makes the decisions. She’ll take my ideas to them for a vote.”
I hold my wine glass out to be refilled since Cole is filling his. “I have another who wants to play soccer.”
“That’s a sport, not an art.”
I roll my eyes. “Yes, I know the difference. He plays the piano and is really good, but it isn’t what he wants. Apparently he was all-star and already being watched by colleges when he was in middle school, before whatever happened, well, happened. If he doesn’t start playing now, he won’t stand a chance of playing in college. Kids are recruited mostly in their junior year, sometimes senior. He can’t wait until college and hope to make a team.”
“I didn’t think there were sports at Baxter.”
“Hell, they don’t even have physical education. It’s something else I’m going to bring up to Mag, though I don’t see how we can have sports teams. What if he’s the only one who wants to play? And, where would we get a coach?”
“Ask Ben?”
“Ben?” Then her eyes light up. “Of course. He coaches at one of the schools. He’ll be able to help.”
“Glad I can be of assistance.”
I grin before taking a drink of my wine. The more I get to know Jenna, the more I want to know. I like my job and can’t imagine doing anything else, but I’m not passionate about it like she is. I kind of envy that in her. “Do a lot of the kids want to pursue their artistic talent?”
“Surprisingly no.”
That’s a surprise. The reason these kids are at Baxter to begin with is because they are gifted.
“There is one girl who sings, acts and dances but wants nothing to do with the theatre, unless it’s for fun, like a community theatre. She wants a normal, nine to five job, or at least normal that she can be home when not at work.”
“Stability?” I’m just taking a guess, but these kids probably didn’t have much in the way of constancy in their life until now. Whereas, there are probably dozens of kids with mediocre talent, living in the safe haven of a home with their parents dreaming of making it big.
“Yep. That’s pretty much it.”
Is she always thinking about her students? I mean, it’s great that she does, and in the past week I’m just coming to understand the depth of her dedication to them. We haven’t really gone out on my days off. Just getting a quick bite to eat and then sitting with Mrs. Ferguson for a bit, after I try to fix her car and then we go back to Jenna’s place. For the most part we’ve watched television and talked. A lot of times she has the computer on her lap, looking at colleges, entrance requirements, scholarships available. She explained it’s because there isn’t enough time in the day. I don’t mind her working when we’re together. It isn’t like she totally ignores me. We’re usually cuddling and I’m watching a game. It’s real comfortable. The night always ends up with us making out, but I haven’t pushed for more. I want to. Hell, I’m aching and miserable, in a frustrating way by the time I leave her place, but I just don’t think it’s time to take it to the next level. Not when I’m still not sure where we are headed.
I glance down at her. I’m a fucking fool. I do know where this is headed, if it’s not already there. I’m falling in love with Jenna Ferguson and I don’t see that emotion dying anytime soon.
She sets her laptop on the table and picks up her wine. Now that her work is no longer in the way, I put my arm around her and pull her close. “So, I never asked, who’s your date for the wedding?”
“Don’t have one.” She tilts her head up and looks at me. “You?”
Does she really think I’m seeing someone else? When the hell would I have time and I certainly don’t have the desire. “Dylan.”
Her eyebrows shoot up. “I get it.” She sits up and turns toward me, an impish grin on her face. “I did always wonder about you two. No wonder he was always taking me to the weddings. His aunts would never approve of you.”
I pull her back against me, kissing her in a way that leaves no doubt in her mind that Dylan is not the person for me.
“Does he know about us?” She asks after break
ing the kiss.
“Would you stop?” I laugh. “No, I don’t have a date. I have my eye on one of the bridesmaids.”
“Morgan? I hear she likes toys. And, she did make it clear what she’d like you to do to her.”
Morgan’s probably the only one who doesn’t remember that announcement. “You know who.”
“I hope so.” Her arms go around my waist and she grins up at me. “Are you asking me to be your date?”
“What do you think?” My hands slide down to her nicely rounded ass and I’m about to pull her onto my lap so she knows exactly what I want, but I stop myself. Soon, but not yet.
“I’ll be honest, it might be best if you don’t count on me.”
My heart drops. This hasn’t been one sided, has it. Is she not feeling what I’ve been feeling? Shit!
“I’m going to be crazy busy that day. Alyssa has us scheduled for mani-pedis, hair, makeup, dressing at the church, pictures, the wedding and then, when we get to the reception, I’ll need to be at the bridal party table until the dancing starts.”
“So you aren’t out and out rejecting me.”
“God no!” She seems shocked that I’d even suggest such a thing. “I’m just warning you of how it’s going to be.”
“I’m good with that, as long as I’m the one you’re dancing with.”
She links her hand with mine. Our fingers intertwine in a way that I can’t wait for our legs to do. “I assume you’re staying in the city? It’ll be too late to bring a train back and I can’t imagine you’ll want to drive.” Alyssa and Justin are getting married in New York. I’d already booked a hotel room, which I was going to share with Dylan. That plan just changed. I’m sure he can share with Joey or Ben. Or, maybe get his own room and his own bridesmaid.
“Alyssa arranged for a suite for the bridesmaids. We’ll be getting ready there beforehand so we might as well crash in thereafter.”
“Or, you can share my room.”
Twenty-One
I swear, if I ever get married, it’s going to be in a small chapel, out in the country somewhere, only a handful of friends, and the dress will be casual. Hell, I might even make flip-flops a requirement.
I took the train as soon as school was done yesterday, and after checking on Nana, and by the time I made it into the city, I barely had time to dump my stuff in the suite and get ready before we headed to the rehearsal. Even though we got back to the hotel fairly early so we could be rested, we ended up staying up and drinking wine until after midnight. Alyssa had us awake and down to breakfast by nine and the day didn’t stop. I was exhausted before we ever got to the church.
But, now the wedding is behind us, toasts have been made and dinner has been served. Only a few more dances and I’ll be free to join Cole. He’s sitting at a table closer to the bar than the wedding party. He’s with Joey, Ben, Dylan, Kian and Alexia. Two of the empty seats are for me and Brendan O’Brien, the groomsman I walked with, and Kian’s younger brother. Until I saw him at the rehearsal, I had no idea he was in the same unit as the groom. I thought Brendan was a medic and Justin’s an explosives expert. I didn’t think they’d be together. But, I don’t know much about the Army either.
The other bridesmaids are interested in the groomsmen, Bren included, and I have to admit they all look pretty damn hot in their dress uniforms, but my eyes are on Cole. The soldiers got nothing on him.
Every time I think that I can’t wait until I can just get out of these shoes and crash I remember that I won’t be sleeping alone tonight.
Just the idea of being in bed with Cole causes heat to scorch through my body. Of course, I’m assuming he wants to have sex. You just don’t ask a girl to share a hotel room if all you plan on doing is sleeping. At least I hope not.
Half of me is thrilled, on the edge with excitement and the other, scared to death. I’ve never been nervous about sex before. But, it’s never been planned either. It always just happened. This is almost like it’s planned, which means expectations. What if I disappoint him?
Oh God.
I down my glass of wine. Brendan gives me an odd look and reaches for one of the chilling bottles to refill my glass.
“Thirsty.” I smile weakly.
“Water might be safer.” He chuckles and looks back out at the guests. We’re up on a dais, five bridesmaids and groomsmen all in a row with two empty chairs in the middle where the bride and groom sat. The music for the father/daughter and mother/groom dance comes to an end and Joey leaves his seat, going to the mic. His brothers are in charge of the music. They play proms, weddings, or any kind of party and from what I understand, they are booked every Friday and Saturday for a year out.
“Who remembers the first date of Alyssa and Justin?”
There’s silence.
“The movie, Eragon.”
The groomsmen and his high school buddies laugh.
“I don’t think I saw that one,” I whisper to Brendan.
“You didn’t miss much.”
“Yes, Justin was a romantic even back then.”
This got more laughter from the guests.
“In honor of that first date, we give you “Keep Holding On” by Avril Lavigne. Alyssa and Justin would like their classmates to grab their date and join them on the dance floor for this trip back in time.”
I remember the song. I had no idea it was from a movie.
My eyes meet Cole’s across the room and he stands. The others aren’t moving as quickly and Alyssa and Justin start pulling people from their seats. Justin’s pushing Kian and Alexia to the dance floor when Cole saunters toward me, stopping just on the other side of the table, looking up and holding out his hand.
“I believe this is your dance,” Brendan chuckles.
I’ve been waiting to get my hands on her since she walked down the aisle in that red, lacy dress. Red’s never been a favorite color of mine, but it sure as hell is the perfect color for Jenna. The top hugs her breasts in a way I hope to be tonight, once I get her alone. The rest of the dress is fitted to her waist and then the skirt flairs and only comes down about mid-thigh. I’ve never seen bridesmaids in such short, flirty dresses, but, I don’t go to that many weddings either.
The dress kind of reminds me of a modern day fifties dress. Even if it does hide her fine ass, this is a style I wouldn’t mind seeing come back. It’s so fucking feminine, showing off the rack but then completely blanketing the hips. It makes a guy hope she might move enough to show what she’s hiding.
She smiles shyly, gets up from her seat, and makes her way to the end of the table. I meet her at the bottom of the three steps and escort her to the dance floor, just as the music is starting. There’s already about a dozen couples out on the floor, swaying to the music and it takes me right back to high school.
I should have just asked her out senior year. Who knows where we’d be right now. But I was a stupid jock and couldn’t appreciate what I was missing out on because I was afraid of rejection.
I pull her close, my hand at the small of her back, when I really want to grab her ass and then the lyrics hit me. I haven’t listened to them in a long time. I mean, really listened to them. I look down at her. “It’s true.”
“What?” she smiles up at me.
“You’re not alone.”
She blinks and her smile fades.
“I’ll be by your side.” That’s all I say as I let go of her hand and put both arms around her body and her arms rest on my shoulders. I’m a better dancer than this, but right now, I just want to hold her and turn circles, just like I danced back in high school.
Why the hell didn’t I have the balls to ask her out then?
I glance over at the bride and groom; they are looking into each other’s eyes and singing the words. At one point I remember Justin telling me that it was “their song”. I was nineteen or twenty at the time and Justin had already been in the Army for a year. I didn’t get it then.
The song ends and I lead Jenna back to our table just as the
catering staff wheels out a large cart with the cake into the center of the dance floor. Justin steps back and pulls out his sword. There’s been a lot of military ceremony with this wedding and a new experience for me.
“No candles,” Jenna whispers.
I turn to her but she’s staring at the cake, sadness in her eyes.
“Candles?”
“Nana and I went to a wedding last spring.” She still isn’t looking at me, but straight ahead, maybe at a memory. “She demanded to know why there weren’t candles on the cake. I couldn’t explain to her that candles only go on birthday cakes.”
I take her hand in mine and give it a squeeze.
“She’s been slipping for a long time and I never saw it.” She turns to me. “I should have noticed.”
“It’s a slow process. Don’t beat yourself up over it.”
Jenna smiles sadly at me. “I won’t. But, after this weekend and I get all moved in, I won’t be leave her again.”
Though I want to argue, I don’t. She’ll need to get out, and not just going to work. Jenna can’t live her life taking care of her grandmother and not living herself. But, I’ll give it time and let her become used to the new living situation. If she stops living, I’ll drag her from the house if I have to. Besides, Nana has a no boys in the room policy and I’ll be damned if tonight is the only night I get to sleep with Jenna.
“I almost booked a ticket to go back on the train tonight.”
“That would have ruined my night.”
She giggles. “I’m sure she’s fine, but I’ve been gone over twenty-four hours and won’t be back until tomorrow, early evening. I hope she’s okay.”
“Did you call her?”
“A couple of times.”
“She’s fine?”
“Seems to be.”
“Tell you what.” I put my arm around her and draw her close. “I’ll check on her as soon as I get back.”
“When are you leaving?”
“Dylan and I gotta leave early. A couple of guys are working over for us but we promised to be at the station by noon.”
Shadows of Memories (Baxter Academy) Page 13