She heard silence on the other end of the line again.
“Ron, are you still there?”
“Yeah, I’m sorry, I got distracted. I’ll call the agency again in the morning and see if I can get someone out here to do the bookkeeping. Sara, did Carl ever talk to you about the people he hung out with? Maybe some clubs or groups he belonged to?”
“Ron, you know I don’t like talking about this.”
“I don’t mean to cause you more pain. I was just going through some of his things and found some pictures and copies of articles off some websites that don’t make sense. I thought he might have talked to you more than me.”
“You know all of his friends who came to the funeral. They would know. He only told me what he thought I wanted to hear.” She took a sip from the sweating glass, set it on the dining bar in the kitchenette, and wiped her wet hand on her skirt.
“He rarely talked to me at all the last few years. It’s why I didn’t know he was depressed.”
“You were never available for him, Ron, or me. You were busy building up the business, schmoozing with important contacts. You took us both for granted.”
“And, now I’ve lost you both.”
“So have I.”
“I’ll ask Jordie and Stacey if they know more about his activities.”
“Go easy on Stacey,” she said. “She just got robbed the other night. They trashed her store and stole the safe.”
“That’s a shame. Was she there at the time? Did she get hurt?”
“Cass says it happened at night. Lucky she wasn’t in the shop. Jordie stayed with her and helped put everything back together.”
“I’ll call her and see if she needs anything.”
“Thanks Ron, I’ve got to get some rest.”
“Have you been sleeping any better?”
“A little bit.”
“Still having nightmares?”
“What do you know about my nightmares? I didn’t tell you about them.”
“Don’t get defensive. I can’t sleep beside you and not know about them. It lacerates my heart every time you have one.”
“You never said anything.”
“What would you have done if I did?”
“I would have walked away, like I did.”
“Precisely. Tell me about your new job?”
“Corporate comptroller for a multinational company headquartered in Portland. They deal in satellite communications. It’s high-powered with very little time to focus on anything else. I think it’ll be just the thing to get my mind away from my personal failures.”
“You don’t have personal failures. Carl’s death was not your fault. He pulled the trigger, not you.”
“I’ve got to hang up now.”
“Wait a minute! Sara? Are you still there?”
“Yes, I’m here.”
After a moment of silence he added, “I just wanted to say you’re not to blame for Carl. Neither of us is at fault there. And, it takes two to break up a marriage. You needed more attention than I was able to give?”
“I’m listening.”
“I haven’t given up on you.”
“Ron, I’ve got to hang up. Goodnight.”
“Try to sleep well. I’ll call again.”
When the phone connection was severed, she tossed her cell onto the sofa. “Oh God, I hate this. Every time he calls, the pain in my heart intensifies. Ah, DAMN IT!”
It tears at my heart too to see you suffer. I would bleed for you if I could. Cry it out. I’m here.
Sara sobbed out her heartbreak, curled up in the recliner. Her head was full of sound.
I love you, mom. I love you.
“I love you, too, Carl. I just hurt so very much without you here.”
I’m right beside you.
“Carl, are you here?”
Silence.
“Carl, please, I’m begging you. Tell me I’m not going crazy.”
Silence.
“I love you, Carl.”
I know. I can feel it. Your pain and love bind me to you.
“You are here!”
I’m here for you, Mom. Apparently you are the only one I can communicate with.
“Why? Better yet, how?”
The why is best left for another time. The how appears to be through your thoughts. I seem to be able to reach you when you are most vulnerable; when you’re upset or exhausted.
“Are you only in my head?”
No. I’ve been trying to connect with you for months now. I try to reach out to you in your dreams. But you wake too soon.
“You are the reason for my nightmares. I mean your attempts to communicate are my nightmares. Aren’t they?”
My connection always goes back to the night I died. I’m sorry if that upsets you. At first it was the only way I could connect. That night at Jordie’s mom’s place was the first time we connected while you’re awake. How is Jordie?
“He’s fine. Stacey was robbed.”
I know. I listened to your conversation with Dad. I’m sorry for eavesdropping. It’s not something I have control over. Your emotions began to peak from the moment Dad started talking on the phone. It pulled me to you.
“I feel silly talking aloud when you’re talking in my head.” Can you hear my thoughts?
Yes, I can hear you. You don’t have to speak, just think your communication.
“That seems like a violation of my privacy. I don’t think I like you having that ability.”
If you tell me not to listen to your thoughts, maybe I’ll be able to tune you out, like I did when I was a pimple-faced teenager.
“Carl Stafford, you devil.” God, it feels good to joke with you again.
That’s right, Mom, just think it. It’ll be safer.
What do you mean, safer?
No one will be tempted to put you in a padded cell. Or a grave. Just think of the image, in a board meeting, or business dinner with your boss. You will definitely look certifiable carrying on a one-sided conversation with thin air.
I’m not crazy, am I?
No, but you’re definitely communicating with the dead. I don’t want to disillusion you, Mom; I won’t give you false hopes. I can’t change what happened, but, I can help you over the rough spots, for as long as I’m allowed.
If you’re here for me now, why did you end your life?
I didn’t.
Oh, my God!
Sleep now. No more questions tonight.
***
“What have you got, Farrell?” Matthew’s contact asked through the phone.
“She spoke to her husband earlier. She’s on the edge with this grief and she’s starting to talk to her dead son. Not where anyone can hear her, just in her hotel room.” Matthew paced his hotel suite with his cell phone to his ear.
“That’s just great! You told me to hire her. Don’t low ball the offer, you said. I give her the third most important position in the company and now she’s talking to the dead.”
“Cool it. She’s not certifiable, she’s grieving. There is a difference.”
“Only you would see nothing wrong in talking to ghosts. What about her husband? Did he have anything interesting to say, or is he talking to the dead, too?”
“He’s found something. I’m not sure what.”
“You think it’s the information Carl took from the cult?”
“If not, it just might lead us to it.” Matthew sat down at the desk in his suite. “I want to have another look at Carl’s possessions.”
“Careful. Don’t blow your cover.”
“When am I not careful? Keep an eye on her; sounds like the lady could use a friend.”
“She has one.”
“I was thinking of male companionship.” Matthew ended the call.
CHAPTER 6
“Louise, will you hold the door for me?” Sara pushed the office door open with her left hand and pulled an overloaded flatbed cart with her right.
“What in the world have you got, Sara?
It looks like a combination botanical garden and furniture sale.” Louise rounded her desk and grabbed the glass door to the accounting and finance offices.
“Just a bit of green, it helps to keep the air fresh. Did Jonathon Pierce give you the list of reading material I want to study this evening?”
“I’ve got it on my desk.”
They pushed the cart into Sara’s new office as a young man in a sky-blue shirt, red tie and black suspenders entered the front room heading for one of the desks. “Looks like somebody bought out a greenhouse,” he said.
“Hi Steve, you’re just in time to help with the heavy work,” Louise said.
”Oh, my back is acting up again.” He winced as he shuffled forward in a Quasimodo gait.
“Knock it off, you ham, and help us get this stuff unloaded.”
“I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Sara Stafford.” Sara reached over the large peace plant with its white pulpit blossoms to test his handshake. Admirable, straightforward, she liked that.
“Glad to meet you, Ms. Stafford. It appears things are looking up already.”
“Please call me Sara; and thanks for your help. Can you pass me that first chair in front of the desk? I’ll use that to stand on.”
“Let me give you some help.” And with that the young man plucked the screwdriver from her hand and climbed up on the left side of the credenza. Louise and Sara smiled at each other; it worked every time.
When the valences were hung, plants in place, and new wall table set up, Sara brushed the dust from her hands and looked around her new office.
“Thank you both for making this light work. I just have a few things to place on my desk and I’ll be done.”
Steve picked up one of the straight back chairs. “Do you want these back in front of the interrogation desk?”
“The what?”
“That’s what Louise and I called this desk when Ross stood behind it.”
Sara looked at them both. They nodded in silent agreement.
“How very unproductive that must have been. I want these chairs out of here. Steve, can you swap them with the two conference chairs I saw just outside my door?”
“Oh nuts.”
“What’s wrong, Louise?”
Sara placed the last item on her desk, a simple gold plate with her name engraved on it, then she turned toward the window Louise was staring at and saw the twist in the fabric. “That’s an easy fix. I’ll just climb up and straighten it.” Stepping up on the last straight back chair, Sara walked gingerly in stocking feet across the credenza and smoothed the folds that were askew.
“That view looks better than a pasture full of cattle.”
“Hello Jonathon, what do you think? Different from before?” Sara turned slowly with her last sentence.
“Let me help you down, little lady. Words fail me as to the feeling I have with you silhouetted against this office window.” He reached out with both hands around her waist and lifted her to the safety of the floor.
“Should have let maintenance do the hard work, you know,” Jonathon scolded gently.
“I thought of that, but I’m not supposed to be here until tomorrow and wanted everything just right before I start working in this room.”
“I believe this is definitely an improvement, although I could have said that honestly without your doodads.” He gave her another one of his lazy grins. “I like that silver and gold print of the globe, gives a taste of class to the room.” He turned a three-sixty and noticed the round chairs Steve had just brought in.
“Do you have enough chairs? Anything else you want to add to the room, or take out of it?” He paused, “Other than the three of us.”
“I’m fine for the moment.” She looked toward the door to her new office where her staff accountants were standing. “Thanks Louise and Steve for your help. I appreciate it.”
Steve turned back to his desk when Jonathon gave him a final order. “Steven, will you call maintenance to pick up the leftover packing and that cart out in the hall?”
“Yes, sir, consider it done.”
Now that Jonathon and Sara were alone in the office, she started brushing imaginary lint off her black slacks, wondering how to continue this conversation. “I hope I haven’t overstepped my bounds in recruiting the help of those two.” She looked up and tried not to let him see any weakness in her statement.
“I’m sure they were not forced into servitude. It was probably an entertaining diversion from staring at computer screens and it gave them a chance to see the new boss is human. I’m not sure if that’s good or bad. Don’t ever let them see weakness in you, Sara. When you’re finished in here, join me in my office. I have something for you.”
Adjusting the two new chairs off to the side of her desk, she picked up a few stray pieces of packing and grabbed her tote bag. From Louise’s desk, she collected the reading material and rapped on the outside of Jonathon’s door. A heartbeat later she heard the command, “Come.”
Louise chuckled, “That’s his usual response, get used to it.”
“I’ve got your contract here.” Jonathon handed Sara one copy of the two-page document. “Have a seat and look it over. Robert already signed it. I’ll add my signature after you. We’ve included a start date of yesterday, September twenty, our agreed upon salary package, confidentiality clause, and a three-year non-competition clause if, or when, you leave Starr Shine. You’ll find it’s a standard employment contract within the industry.”
After a few minutes scanning the document, she signed it using the bone handle pen from his desk. “An unusual pen.”
“It was a present from my parents upon college graduation. They figured if I had a piece of long horn on my desk, it would remind me where home was.”
“Did it work?”
“Yep, sure enough did. You and Louise might like to share lunch tomorrow. There will be a pile of reports for you to review in the afternoon. You’ll have access to the computer files by then. Don’t get too attached to the security code. We like to change them every couple months; it keeps the rustlers out.”
“Yes, sir.”
She made it halfway to the door.
“Sara?”
“Yes?”
“Plan on meeting me here tomorrow at four. We’ll discuss what you’ve reviewed.”
“Anything else before I go?”
“Here.” He extended her copy of the contract with his signature fresh at the bottom of the second page.
“Thanks.”
“Do you have framed copies of your degrees?”
“Yes.”
“Find some space on your office walls for them. It looks good when we have company.” She looked up then and noticed his on the wall beside his desk: Texas A & M, Princeton, Harvard.
“Will do,” she nodded. “See you tomorrow, Jonathon.”
She was half way across the room again.
“Sara?”
“Yes?”
“Anything else troubling you? Anything we can take care of here at the office?”
“Why do you ask?”
“You look a little tired, and we haven’t begun to start dumping work on you.”
“Everything is fine. No problems.” With that she finally got through his office door closing it quietly behind her. She wondered what those last questions were all about. Did she look that dreadful?
***
Ron sat at his desk, leaning forward on his elbows, with the phone to his ear. “Stacey, I’m calling because we heard about the break-in you had at your shop. Sara was talking to Jordie’s mom. She said they trashed your store in the process. Were you hurt?”
“Luckily, I wasn’t here. They hit the store after closing on Saturday night. I went in on Sunday to work on some orders and when I opened the front door, all the art work on the walls, glass display cabinets, and supply cabinets had been smashed and ripped apart. They took the cash register and the little safe I keep in the back room. They slashed the boxes of new inventory I hadn�
��t even opened. It was a real mess.”
“Well, thank God you weren’t in the building at the time. They could have hurt you, too.”
“Jordie came by when the police were here. He stayed with me until they all left then helped me clean out some of the debris. I’ve been trying to make a list of the stuff I lost. It’s hard.”
“Do you think your insurance will cover the loss?”
“I have insurance for the shop and the contents, but not for my apartment.”
“What happened to your apartment?”
“While Jordie and I were down here with the police, somebody, I don’t know if it was the same person, trashed my apartment.”
“My God, Stacey! This doesn’t sound like a simple break-in. Is anything missing from your apartment?”
“I didn’t have anything valuable enough to steal. They just trashed it. I keep thinking they must have been looking for something; but I can’t think of what.”
“What do the police think?”
“You know the police. They think I had some drugs or money belonging to the burglar. I’m not into that kind of stuff, Mr. Stafford. I don’t know why I was picked on. Now, the police are suspicious of me and Jordie. That’s just not fair. I’m the victim and Jordie is my friend. Why would he trash my shop at night and help me mop up on Sunday. And, who would be trashing my place while Jordie and I were at the shop with the cops. I don’t understand!”
“All right, calm down. Let’s work on the problem one step at a time. You said you have insurance for the shop and its contents. What about your apartment? Do you have a place to sleep temporarily?”
“I’m sleeping on Jordie’s couch until I can get new locks installed and another mattress. Mattress batting and feathers from my pillows are all over my apartment. The kitchen space is full of broken glass. And the landlord says he’s not responsible for replacing anything. Says it was my own fault. I should make my friends pay for their own wild parties.”
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