‘I think I know,’ I said.
Everyone stared at me but I struggled to meet anyone’s eyes. It took me a few awkward moments to plan what I wanted to say and then to pry free the inevitable guilt that stuck its claws into the words. Aunt Lily and the sergeant already knew Noah and I were freaks. I was only clarifying things they needed to be aware of. I shouldn’t have to feel guilty about that.
‘The good news is that Tessa isn’t in any danger.’ I could feel the tension building in Bane’s body every second. ‘I read him. When he was taping my hands. He never came for Tessa, he only took her because I wasn’t there.’ I tried to think of some way to say what I had to without my Guardian turning into a neurotic mess. There just wasn’t one. ‘It was always me,’ I confessed. ‘If it was just about his curiosity with healing, it should have been Bane that he went after, but it wasn’t. It was always about me, from the moment he saw me being healed. It triggered something. Something he couldn’t get out of his head. I saw three years’ worth of visions of his obsession. He didn’t just want to see me getting healed again—that was only a trigger for his compulsion. What he really wants is to see me die. Not even he understands why.’
I couldn’t bring myself to turn to look at Bane, but I could see that everyone else was, and his panic was reflected in each of their faces.
Tessa picked it up first. ‘Seeing you get healed was proof that you’re a Cherub. He’s compelled to kill Cherubim.’ Her hands kept clenching as if she was looking for something to grab onto, like a weapon.
I looked her in the eye. ‘So it’s vitally important that he never sees you healing Noah. It will trigger a compulsion to kill him too.’
‘But why? How does he know what you are?’ Aunt Lily asked.
‘I don’t think he does. Bane and Tess were compelled to protect us before they had any idea of what we were, and both Noah and I felt the need to guard Eden before we even knew it existed. There are powers at play here that don’t seem to be dependent on what we do or don’t understand.’
Behind me I could feel Bane trembling like a pressure cooker about to blow, so I clasped his hands in mine, hoping the direct skin contact would help.
‘Are you sure about this, Lainie?’ Noah asked, doing the same for Tess. ‘I hate to say it, but maybe you’ve forgotten that there are actually people on this side of the Boundary that are just plain rotten. Not every vicious person is involved in the supernatural, and Jake was never exactly the best example of decent behaviour. Remember when he let those ponies loose because he thought it would be funny to watch them dodging all the cars in town? If he really has been obsessing over Bane healing you for three years, then maybe this was just the inevitable outcome.’
Perhaps he was right. My view of the world was a bit skewed. Unfortunately Bane disagreed.
‘No,’ he said. ‘Not only did he drag Tessa all the way to Melbourne and all the way back again in the space of a day, but he didn’t even bother to check if Lainie was home before coming here in the first place.’ He let go of my hands and went to look out of the window, as if he expected to see Jake walking up the driveway. His looked so angry and I could see his shoulder muscles flexing under his shirt. ‘That bastard tricked Noah into leaving and then came here, with his dad’s gun, hoping to either kill Lainie or watch me heal her again. When he found that she wasn’t here he could have just come back another day. Instead he decided to abduct Tessa, with apparently no clear plan other than hoping that Noah would find and rescue her. I know he’s no criminal mastermind, but if it was just about wanting to witness another miracle, even Jake could have come up with something smarter than that with three years to plan.’ He turned back to me. ‘And so just what powers are at play here?’ he asked. ‘What can Jake do? I stopped him last time. He won’t get so close again.’
Jake might not have been a criminal mastermind, but Bane’s tone of voice would have made even Magneto flinch.
I took a deep, guilt-heavy breath, reminding myself that we needed the policeman’s help. Eden needed him to know this. ‘Well, for starters, I think he can do something similar to what Noah does without even realising it. He charms people.’
My fellow Sentinel looked taken aback at my compliment.
‘I mean in a supernatural way. You can talk anyone into anything, Noah, particularly when it helps us do our job, and I hate to tell you, you’re not that good looking. I think Jake can do the same, which would be how he convinced the judge at his hearing that he wasn’t a threat.’
‘And what about the … bigger powers?’ the sergeant asked, still holding his hat.
While I thought it through, I smoothed my fingers along the battered surface of the wooden table. ‘I’d like to think that if he had them, he would have used them last time. I can only use mine when the secret of Eden is under direct threat. If his powers are defined by his compulsion to kill me then he would have had access to them that day, when I was right in front of him.’ It made sense, I hoped.
‘Well if charm’s all he’s got, then good luck to him. It won’t work on me and I’m not letting you out of my sight until he’s in police custody again,’ Bane said.
‘What if he gets hold of another gun?’ Tessa asked.
The policeman shook his head. ‘We’ve put out fresh community warnings for people to be vigilant about their firearm security. We’ve made it abundantly plain that gun owners will be penalised if they don’t take the necessary precautions to keep their guns secure.’
She didn’t look convinced.
Noah squeezed her hand again. ‘Bane’s already put a new lock on our gun cupboard. He won’t get to ours, I promise.’
‘I want a key.’
‘No.’
‘Not your choice, Noah.’
‘If we didn’t need it for the farm, I would get rid of that thing in an instant,’ he said.
‘I know, but—’
Sergeant Loxwood cleared his throat. ‘I’m sorry, Tessa, but I’ll be confiscating yours and the Ashbrees’ farm rifles for a while. Your licence was granted for farm use purposes only, and quite frankly, you’re scaring me a little.’
I let out a pent breath, and glanced at Bane. He didn’t seem as bothered by the sergeant’s edict as Tessa clearly was.
‘So what are we supposed to do if he comes back? Hope that Bane has his knife handy?’ she asked. ‘I can’t risk fighting back right now, remember? I was completely helpless when he came for me before. I can’t even protect myself right now, let alone Lainie.’ She opened her mouth to argue more, but then noticed Noah’s mortified expression and seemed to change her mind. Her next words sounded a bit calmer. ‘Look, we need to find Jake so you can lock him up before he has a chance to arm himself.’
Sergeant Loxwood looked down at his hat again. ‘Ah. I hate to have to say it but unless I can convince the judge to change his mind, we’re going to have to wait until Jake breaches his bail conditions, or until he attempts to make contact with one of you again, which I believe is one of the conditions anyway. Until then I can’t arrest him. What I will do, though, is to try to get out here as often as I can between shifts, to keep an eye on things. Do you still have that spare bed, Lily?’
My aunt nodded. ‘I’ll see if I can stay next door for a few days. You’re needed here more than I am. I’ll just be a few minutes away if anyone wants me.’
At least that way she would get some peace and some space to herself, I hoped, although it did mean staying under the same roof as Nicole, who was anything but quiet.
Everyone was watching me with puppy dog eyes again, like they had when I’d come home from hospital. Except for Tessa, who looked like she wanted to bite someone.
I grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl. ‘I’ll be fine, people. Stop fussing. Our powers way outstrip his, not to mention that Bane can sense any threat to me long before it happens. We’ll sort this out quickly enough, don’t
worry.’
Juice squirted as I took a huge bite. I was trying to look as relaxed as I sounded but the truth was that I was struggling to believe my own assurances. Life had just become a whole lot more complicated.
Cold wind whipped the leaves of the wattle trees, which looked bereft without their golden blossoms. They lent their somnolence to the current, calming me as I waded into the river to talk to Dallmin. The music filled my heavy heart, transforming itself from a background comfort in my mind to an overwhelming feeling of peace and serenity that refused to be denied. No earthly worries or petty death threats could distract me from the beauty that I tasted in the water’s music. Life itself dripped from my fingertips, healing me in subtle ways that even Bane’s touch couldn’t. And yet it was only a shadowy echo of the River of Life that flowed through the Garden. How precious a gift to have been able to take the River for granted while I was there. Its steadfast presence and abundant healing power was just such an intrinsic part of Eden that I had barely appreciated it. Until it was gone.
I pressed against the river’s tug until I reached the rock he was sitting on, and climbed up next to him. ‘What are you feeling?’ I asked.
He turned his dark eyes on me, his long lashes wet from his swim. Or had he been crying?
‘There are many new feelings I have no name for,’ he said. ‘It is better here in the water, but not the same. I keep looking around for Fruit and of course there is none. It leaves me feeling …’
Hollow. Empty. Bereft. Incomplete. I understood completely. And I had hardly eaten any. He must be craving it like an addict.
‘You miss Eden,’ I stated.
Shoulders hunched, he let his long fingers trail in the water with a delicate touch. Sadness coloured every movement, every breath.
‘I do. Each tight moment. And yet I’m afraid I can’t go back now. I am tainted, Lainie. I understand now, and my understanding is what has tainted me.’
Bloody Jake. I totally blamed him. Almost totally.
‘We don’t know that for certain, Dallmin, we could still try. Please don’t give up hope.’
His smile betrayed a wisdom way beyond the youthfulness of his face. ‘It is not in me to ever give up hope. If Life can exist here in this small stream, then it can remain in me even while I live in this place. I will find a way to get home, and even if I don’t, it is not the end of the story.’
A small spark of light still danced behind his eyes, reminding me of his innate fun-loving nature. I would keep that light kindled somehow, for as long as it took to get him back home.
‘Dallmin, there’s something I want you to do. Or, actually, not do. If Jake comes back, I want you to stay out of the way as best you can. I know Bane gave you a knife, and I know why. He told me that you understood too. But please, whatever happens, no matter how justified it seems, I don’t want you to kill. Not even to save me, or even Tessa. It will taint you more than anything else. Even Cherubim would be unable to enter Eden if we could kill.’
He pondered that for a long time, droplets of water falling from his dark hair.
‘Please, Dallmin. Promise me! You must never kill another human, no matter what.’
‘And if I were to stand by and let him hurt you, in order to save myself from the taint, what would that do to me? No, Lainie, I can’t promise what you ask. My spirit has had to change shape to make space for this new understanding of … sadness, and I can no longer live as I once did, so I must discern what’s right and wrong for myself, and take responsibility for my choices.’
Bloody centuries-old elf, why did he have to have caught on so quickly? With my tears melting into the current, I hugged him and then returned to where Bane was pacing along the riverbank.
Chapter 49
Even the abysmal failure of his last attempt couldn’t keep Jake away once his shoulder had healed enough for him to drive a car. Early on Friday morning, less than a day after his unexpected release, Jake made the mistake of parking his car on the side of the road, half a kilometre from the Ashbrees’ front gate. When Tim took one of the dirt bikes over for a visit, he noticed it and immediately called Nicole, who was working out in the yards. She raced back to the house just in time to see a hooded figure peering in through one of the back windows. She seemed to think he was roughly Jake’s height and build, but didn’t manage to see his face before he took off on foot across the paddocks. Of course she gave chase on her four-wheeler, but he escaped by climbing through a series of barbed-wire fences while Nicole had to ride the long way around.
They called the sergeant immediately, who sent an officer to keep an unobtrusive watch on the car. No one came back to claim it, so he had it towed away, which pleased Tessa more than it should have. She suggested that Jake might have found out that Aunt Lily was staying at the Ashbree farm and had possibly been planning to abduct her to lure me out. Despite the fact that a similar tactic had worked pretty well last time, it was still a stupid plan. How had he expected to get at her with Noah’s dad David, Liam and Nicole all at the farm as well? Perhaps he’d just been doing some surveillance, but it still seemed a bit slip-shod. Unfortunately that just lent even more weight to the theory that he was being driven by a supernatural compulsion.
Liam was furious and delayed his return to Western Australia so he could guard Lily and his family until Jake was apprehended.
That afternoon Bane called a meeting.
‘We need to get organised if we’re going to keep everyone safe from this jerk,’ he announced without preamble. We had all squeezed into our kitchen, which usually felt pretty spacious, but Bane had insisted on including all the Ashbrees and Tim as well. We would have to be careful what was said. There were maps laid out across the faithful kitchen table and I almost expected to see coloured pins representing armies deployed on them. Maybe I should have fished out the box of Risk pieces for him to play with.
‘There are eleven of us, if we include Mick, and only one of him. It shouldn’t be too hard to keep an eye on both farms, if we work together,’ Liam stated, placing his hand on Noah’s shoulder as they scanned the maps.
Tim nodded. ‘Or is it worth considering defending just one farm? Or perhaps moving Lainie and Tessa into town, or even to Melbourne?’
That wasn’t going to happen. For us to leave, Noah and Bane would have to come too, which would leave Eden unguarded altogether. Only how was I meant to explain that to the others?
‘No. The farms still need to be looked after and I won’t risk going to the city where anyone can get access to them so easily. I’d rather stay where we have a bit more control over the variables.’ Bane dismissed both suggestions with a rough shake of his head. The casual looking cargo pants and black T-shirt he’d thrown on that morning suddenly took on a whole new meaning. He had entered the Army Zone.
Army-Bane started handing out sheets of paper to everyone. They looked Scary Official.
‘I ordered some farm surveillance equipment online last night,’ he said. ‘But it will take a week or so to arrive. In the meantime we need to make sure the area is adequately patrolled. These are copies of a roster I’ve drawn up so we can make sure someone’s keeping an eye out at all times. Noah and I will remain with Lainie and Tessa the whole time so I haven’t included us on the rosters.’
I winced. It wasn’t hard to imagine how that sounded to the people not entirely in the know, but he didn’t bat an eyelid. He expected to be obeyed as if they were his squad members and he was in charge.
I raised my hand like a meek little school girl. ‘Er, Lance Corporal Bane, sir …’
He rolled his eyes at me.
‘If Tess and I stay together we could manage without one of you. It’s only fair,’ I continued in a more normal voice.
Bane shook his head once and continued to hand around the rosters. It was Tim who explained. ‘Fair doesn’t come into it, Lainie. We’re talking Protection Detail. It
’s all about efficiency and thoroughness, not fairness, sorry.’
As if his suggestion was more efficient than mine, seriously. My annoyance was reflected in every line of Tessa’s body too. She was frowning at her belly as if blaming it for her predicament. It was beyond embarrassing that we were being fussed over like glass princesses. When I’d first found out that I needed a Guardian, it had taken a lot of self-control not to unleash too much of my hurt pride on Bane. Mostly I’d managed it by reminding myself that Noah was in the same position, so logically I knew it had nothing to do with me being female. The fact that Jake was targeting me and not Noah was making it difficult to stay mature about it though. I was angry on so many levels. Stupid Jake. Still, Tessa shouldn’t have to put up with the ignominy too. So I tried again.
‘Well, perhaps we should consider sending Tess and Noah to Melbourne early. They won’t be targeted if I’m here.’
As soon as the words left my mouth I realised that I had given too much detail. The others didn’t know why Jake had taken Tessa, or that I was his real goal. Why hadn’t the embargo stopped me from speaking? I’d relied on it for too long. This situation was not a direct threat to Eden, and I obviously hadn’t said anything that would reveal too much, but it was enough to initiate unwanted questions because Noah’s dad piped up as if on cue.
‘What exactly is Jake after? No one has explained why he went after Tess in the first place. You all knew him in high school, didn’t you? Doesn’t his mum work in the bakery with that girl Noah used to go out with?’
In such a small country town there was almost always a connection somewhere if you looked hard enough, and David Ashbree had found one. Noah cringed a little, picking up the cat to avoid Tessa’s glare as we were all reminded of his fling with Claudia. Tim grinned as his faith in teenage hormones was renewed. He must have been starting to think all of us country folk were bonded from birth. Which may actually have been true.
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