by T. J. West
“Honestly, it really does.” Her sincerity is unreal. Then out of nowhere she tells me, “I talked with Jet Master.”
“Whoa, seriously? Why?”
“I had to get the scoop on Stax House Music, and since King’s Fate is signed with Stax, well…it only made sense.” She shrugs.
I’m super curious as to what Jet had to say. We haven’t talked for a while, but when we do we always have a good time and enjoy each other’s company. He’s been a long time mentor of mine and I’ll never forget our first tour together. He’s taught me a lot. “What’d he say?”
“Stax has had some financial troubles lately and so they’ve become desperate. Jet mentioned that they’re looking for another label and it looks like BT2090 is considering signing them.”
I take off my hat, combing a hand through my hair, then settling it back on my head. “Jesus. No wonder Howard White was hounding me,” I mumble to myself, astounded.
“The company isn’t doing so well. In fact they might go into bankruptcy early next year—if of course this reality show doesn’t help.”
Damn, I feel like such a fool. I made a huge mistake and will be paying for it for the rest of my life—unless the guys will forgive me? Yeah right. Sadly, I don’t have a lot of hope that they will. “With all of this info, how can this bring the guys around? I’m still in deep shit. I may lose my band.”
“The only thing I can say is this: the European tour is what will be called your redemption tour. Show them how dedicated and loyal you still are. Remind them you’re never going to leave them and will be honest with them from now on. Things will fall into place and they’ll remember how well you guys work and play together. I’m sure they’ll slowly come around. Have faith. I know I do.” Lyric pulls a sad smile, yet her words bring me some hope back. If what she said can lead me back inside JINKS, I’ll do anything to make that happen.
Shortly after Lyric leaves, Faith comes out in one of my t-shirts and nothing else. It ends at the beginning of her thighs, showing off her sexy as fuck long and lean legs. Damn, my wife is gorgeous.
“Was someone here?” She yawns and stretches her arms above her purple and black, messy bed head. The shirt rises above her belly and reveals her little lace panties. She’s looks good enough to eat right now.
“Watcha doin’ outta bed, baby? You need to rest.” I walk over to her and embrace her body against mine. Her arms wrap around my waist and rests her head against my chest. I love having her this close to me at all times.
“I’m thirsty,” she says.
“I’ll get you something to drink. Go back to bed.”
“No. I’m tired of the bed.” Her voice is pouty and adorably sexy. I can only guess that her bottom lip is sticking out.
Kissing her on the top of her head, I chuckle. “Then go get on the couch.” I swat her ass to get her moving. “Want tea? Water?”
When she plops herself down, her face scrunches up in distaste. “Ugh…tea. No thanks. This baby hates it right now.” She pats her slight baby bump. Still can’t believe we made that little bump. “Orange juice sounds good, though.”
Handing her a glass of OJ, she’s now curled up with a blanket over her legs. “Here.”
“Thanks, babe.” She smiles and takes a long sip of her OJ. I then sit beside her, grabbing her legs and place them over my lap. “So who was here?” she asks me again.
“Lyric.”
She gasps and sets the OJ on the coffee table then crosses her arms. “Oh, crap. Was it bad?”
“Actually, it was good.” I shrug. I reach underneath the blanket and begin massaging her feet, then relay the conversation I had with Lyric.
“Such a relief,” she says after hearing Lyric was beyond incredible to me. “I’m so glad she’s not taking it like the others. I knew I always liked her.”
Still massaging Faith’s feet, I softly reply, “She’s pretty amazing, that’s for sure. I don’t deserve it.”
Quickly, she crawls onto my lap and grabs my face, kissing me. My hands automatically make their way up inside her shirt, feeling her warm skin. “Babe, you deserve an entire kingdom and so much more. Stop beating yourself up over this,” she tells me with such fierce passion in her eyes. She’s so fucking amazing.
“Same goes for you.” What she and June are going through is tearing my wife apart. Although it’s only been a few days since the shit hit the fan, I can see Faith is punishing herself just as much I am.
With a sadness in her eyes, her hands fall from my face; she lays her head on my shoulder as I keep my arms wrapped tightly around her. “Yeah, well, it’s just… I feel so terrible about how June and I left things.”
I kiss the side of her head. “June needs to apologize for that. Pisses me off how she went off on you and almost hurt the baby.”
“She didn’t almost hurt the baby, but it was my fault for overreacting. These hormones are insane.”
“Hormones or not, she needs to fucking get over herself. You need each other.” It infuriates me to no end that June hasn’t even come over to check on Faith. What the fuck is wrong with her?
“I know we do.” She sighs then brings her face up to mine and smiles. “You’re the best. You know that?”
Her words never cease to amaze me. They ignite a fire inside me. Caressing her pink, glowing cheek, I tell her, “So are you, baby. The best fucking thing that ever happened to me.”
By the end of the week, however, Faith has become almost a shell of who she was before the big blow up. She goes to work, comes home, and tries her hardest to be happy. The once ocean blue shine in her eyes is now gloomy, dark and sad. Her smile never reaches those eyes, and it absolutely devastates me. Even making love has been different. My vibrant wife has turned into a dark storm. The only thing I know that could help her out of this shitty storm is June. Faith is lost without her best friend, and I’ll be damned if I’ll allow June to continue being a bitch.
Before heading to the airport for Seattle to do a weekend gig with Justin, I quickly make a detour over to the studio. My blood is boiling with undeniable anger. If I can’t get through to June with this unexpected visit, I don’t know what else will work. She’s gotta come to her senses. If not, Faith will continue to spiral down and that ain’t gonna fly with me.
Storming past Monica, June’s assistant, I hear her telling me that June’s busy. Fuck that. June will make the time if I have anything to say about it. Entering her office I catch her on the phone, but that doesn’t stop me. “You need to hear me out,” I interrupt her, gritting my teeth.
“Sorry, June. I told him you were on a conference call,” Monica says behind me, winded.
June looks pissed, but she’s a professional and tucks her self righteous attitude away for show. “It’s fine, Monica,” she replies with a fake smile and keeps her eyes on me. Once Monica leaves and closes the door, June continues her phone call. “Hi, sorry for the interruption. Unfortunately, though, I need to get back to you next week on this. Is that okay?…Thanks, James. Have a good weekend.”
Bringing her hands on top of her desk, she interlocks them together and sighs. “What is it, Lucky? I’m extremely busy.”
With three big steps I’m now in front of her desk. June raises her chin to look up at me and the only thing she can see from me is pure impatience and animosity in my eyes. I’ve had enough of this shit she’s putting on Faith. Placing my hands on top of the desk, I slowly lean in. Calmly, but with rage inside, I tell her, “Then let me make this fast and very fucking clear for you. I know you’re upset with me, but you need to get your sassy, stubborn self outta here and go see Faith. She’s fucking breaking apart right before my eyes and it’s all because of you. I don’t fucking care if you never forgive me, but you need to forgive her! She needs you like she needs to breathe, June. I’ve never seen her so torn and depressed. My wife doesn’t deserve this and you fucking know it. Get your head outta your ass, or so fucking help me, I’ll quit the band right here and right now and pay the price
for it later on. Faith means more to me than all the fucking money and fame in the world. And now we’re having a goddamn baby. A baby you’ll be missing out on if things don’t turn around. Make the right fucking choice, June. Go see her.”
Without another word, I turn on my heel and don’t even wait for a response. I had my say and now the ball is in her court. If she’s smart, she’ll make amends. If not, I’m fucking done.
I KNOW LUCAS HAS NOTICED me not acting like myself. I’m depressed over the loss of my best friend. How long will it take for her to speak with me again? Did I lose her for good for something that had nothing to do with me? I’m usually the voice of reason, the one who is strong and doesn’t give a damn about the little things. I try to not let things bother me. But with June, it’s a whole other issue. I’m living day by day in a state of just existing. It sounds pathetic, I know, but at the end of the day, I miss my best friend who I need, desperately.
Lucas went to Seattle to perform with Justin for the weekend. He almost didn’t go, but I convinced him to get away for a couple days. I know he’s worried about me and the baby; I love him for wanting to protect us, but getting back on his feet by performing is a type of therapy I can’t give him. So instead of wallowing around in my suite all weekend and feeling sorry for myself, I’ve decided to work. It’s what I’m good at. It helps distract me from my daily worries. My mom is out of town with Gary, so work it is.
Walking in the front lobby with my large, three ring binder filled with daily reports of the hotel, I make my way to my office. I don’t notice anyone around me; I’m in my own world, minding my business, thinking of nothing in particular when someone taps me on the shoulder, causing me to drop my binder on the floor.
“Faith!”
Holy shit!
My heart is pounding out of my chest like a freaking jackhammer has landed on top. I put a hand to my heart, trying to get my bearings back. “God, you scared me,” I say out of breath.
Harmony picks up the binder for me and cradles it in her arms. “I called your name like three times.” She smiles sweetly at me yet I know the tone in her voice. She’s concerned for me. I don’t blame her, really. I haven’t been myself lately.
I cover my eyes with my hand, embarrassed with my behavior. “Ugh, sorry. I just have a lot on my mind.”
“I can imagine.” She touches my shoulder. “I hate to ask, but have you been avoiding me because of what’s happening between the guys?”
My eyes suddenly snap open to meet with hers. “What? No.” I sigh. “No, I haven’t. I’m so sorry. I guess I’ve been caught up in other things.” My voice is trembling, and I’m afraid I’m going to break down on her.
Her hand remains on my shoulder. “Faith, you do know I’m here for you, right? You’re not alone.”
I feel my eyes filling up with tears. The control to keep my emotions in check isn’t happening. “Thank y…” I can’t finish properly thanking my friend. The waterworks come spilling out of my eyes. Before I know it I’m in Harmony’s arms.
“Oh, sweetie, what’s wrong? You want to me call Lucky or your mom for you?”
I shake my head and try to control myself. “No. Please don’t do that.” I sniff. “Lucas has done enough for me. Plus he’s doing a gig in Seattle right now and I really don’t want to worry him.”
“Okay, well let’s go sit down so we can breathe a little, yeah?”
I nod my head, not sure what else to say, other than, “Thanks, Harmony.”
“Of course.” We walk over to one of the many lobby benches and sit down for a breather. “You wanna talk about it?”
I let out a deep breath and wipe the tears from my face. “It’s June. She hasn’t reached out…like at all. I mean, I understand her being mad and stuff and hurt, but I was only supporting my husband. You know?” I look to Harmony, hoping she’ll agree with me.
“Absolutely,” she strongly agrees, thank God. “I don’t one hundred percent love what’s gone down, but in no way are you to blame. June just wants to blame someone else because she’s pissed and you’re the next best target.” Just then, June appears in front of us. “Oh, hey, June.” Harmony’s voice has a surprised tone to it with a hint of panic. Here we are, talking about June and she shows up out of the blue. I wonder if she overheard our conversation? Harmony gives me a hug and quietly says in my ear, “We’ll talk later.” I can only nod and watch her walk away.
June slowly sits down beside me, wringing her fingers together. I can’t seem to look at her face, afraid for some reason. Dumb, I know, but it’s been a horrible week and I don’t want to break down again.
“How’s the baby?” she asks quietly and reserved.
I’m curt with her when I respond. “Fine. We’re good.”
“Well, you don’t look so good.”
What the hell?
After being ignored for days, that’s the first thing she wants to say to me? “Thanks a lot. What are you doing here, June?” I ask irritated.
She sighs. “I’ve been neglecting you when you’ve needed me the most.”
“Yeah. You have.”
“I was hurt.”
I comb a hand through my unruly hair and loudly exhale. “I get it, but…”
She takes hold of my hand. “You didn’t deserve my anger. I’m so sorry.” Her words are sincere and I see her eyes are slightly glazed. My best friend has finally come back to me.
My voice is thick with emotion when I reply, “Thank you.”
“I never meant to make you feel this way. I’m ashamed of how I’ve treated you. Especially now with the baby and all… It wasn’t right.”
I can’t help it. The tears overfill my eyes and they begin to slither down my cheeks. “I’ve been an awful mess, June.”
Immediately, she takes me into her arms and we cry together. “I know. I’m sorry,” she whispers. We’re silent for a couple minutes, allowing ourselves to have this moment. Once we wipe our faces with the tissue June grabbed from her purse, she continues. “Losing my best lead singer to another label scared me. I thought Lucky was happy with my company. It hurt something fierce.”
“He has been happy!” I squeeze her hand. “He loves you and the company and JINKS. He just… It was like the unknown that he was drawn to, I don’t know. He needed to do this, June. Not to hurt you or the guys, but to see what else is out there.”
“Yeah, well… I’ll never understand, I guess.” She shrugs.
I feel the need to explain my husband’s side. “He knew the second he stepped foot in Stax’s office that it was wrong. He felt sick about it. And he’ll live the rest of his life regretting it. All I ask is for you to forgive him and move on. Life is too short to dwell on something that can’t be changed. Lucas isn’t leaving Bitch Tours or JINKS. I mean, like, ever.” Suddenly I feel a sharp pang in my abdomen. It causes me to twitch.
“Right.”
I put a hand to my small baby bump. “June—” I strain to say.
June continues to think we’re still talking about Lucas. “No, no…no need to explain anymore. I get it.”
Another shooting pain, like a cramp settles in my lower back and under my belly. Something’s wrong. “June… I don’t feel so well.”
“What?”
“Something’s wrong with the baby.” I begin to panic.
“Oh my God! Let’s get you to the hospital right away.”
OUR FRIDAY NIGHT GIG WAS a sell out and the best show Justin and I have done since the first time we decided to collaborate our music. We were on a roll and having the time of our lives. Saturday night at the Surf Bar in Seattle is another great night. Thanks to the owner, Murdoch, he helped spread the word about us around on social media. His is one of the most popular bars in the area. Everyone talks about this place, so getting a spot to play for the locals is an honor.
We just played a few numbers and now are ready for a break. “Thanks everyone! We’re gonna take a short fifteen-minute break. Be back soon,” I say into the microphone.<
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“Ready for that smoke?” Justin asks while I set my guitar down.
“Hell yeah.” Once outside, we light up our cigs. I close my eyes as I blow out my first inhale of smoke. “Fuck, I’m tired.”
“Gettin old is the shits.” Justin chuckles.
“Tell me about it.”
“Wait ‘til you have the baby, I’m sure you’ll feel it even more so.”
Just thinking about becoming a dad is unnerving. “Fuck me…a fucking baby. Hope I don’t make a shitty dad. I didn’t have the best upbringing. Last thing I wanna do is fuck up my own kid.”
“Look man, you can’t think like that. You’re a good husband, have a fantastic wife… Just go with the flow. Don’t stress over it. You’ll do the best you can.”
I take another drag of my smoke. “Yeah. Hope so. Thanks, bro.” Just then my phone vibrates in my back pocket. “Yeah,” I answer.
“It’s Faith…the baby.” A frantic June yells on the other end.
I straighten from leaning against the wall, suddenly on high alert. “What the fuck you talkin’ ‘bout? What’s wrong with them?”
“Faith’s been admitted to the hospital. She had pains in her back and stomach. You need to come home.”
“On my way.” I hang up.
“What’s wrong?” Justin asks concerned.
My heart is pounding like fucking crazy. I feel helpless with being so far away from Faith. “Need to get home. Something’s wrong with the baby.” All sorts of scenarios creep around inside my head. If I lose my woman and unborn baby…
Justin snaps me out of my dark thoughts by placing a hand on my shoulder and says, “Look, I’ll call the pilot and let him know you’re on your way. Get going.”
“Thanks.”
“Let me know the details, alright?”
“Yeah, yeah.” We quickly walk to the van together. I hop in then buckle up and start the engine.
“Hope they’re okay.”
“Me too, brother.” I shut the van door and haul ass to the airport.