Fast-forward a little bit. Harold was now in the third and final phase of Ranger School: swamp phase. I received another letter. This one contained a prayer.
Dear God,
Rachel and I come to You today to praise You for who You are. We can’t thank You enough for Your love toward us and our love we share together. I’ve been blessed with the most beautifully created woman, inside and out, and she is a great reflection of You. God, I pray that although we are not together physically, our love for each other continues to grow stronger. I feel so blessed right now, God, and I feel like You have a plan for everything. Please take care of and protect my wife in my absence. God, we love You, we want You in our lives, and we pray You will use us in a grand and mighty way. We love You, God. In Your name, amen.
I could see an obvious spiritual growth happening in him, reflected in the letters he sent me. I was so sure climbing Everest would bring him closer to God, but as it turns out, it wasn’t until after Everest and a few more challenges that he was able to see how clearly God was working in his life. It was a good reminder for me that we all walk our own road with God. While I can support and encourage those around me in their faith, it isn’t fair to put a timeline or expectations on someone else’s walk.
HAROLD
At Ranger School, the chaplain handed out a devotional book to every Ranger. My squad mates and I would pull it out while lying in a swamp on security duty, read it, and then talk about it for hours. It reminded me of the value of having a friend to talk with about God. I was constantly learning new stuff about God and my faith. The difference between Ranger School and Everest was that now I was intentionally working on my faith. On Everest, I was simply touching base with God, making sure He could hear me with a “hey, look at me, I’m worshipping You” kind of mind-set because I wanted Him close. On Everest, I wanted God close to me; at Ranger School, I wanted to be close to God.
Looking back, I realize that I took for granted how strong Rachel’s relationship was with God and used it as an excuse for thinking, Oh, she’ll be fine. I hadn’t done anything to help her continue to grow in her faith while I was gone. I knew she would remain close to Him. The problem is, we fail the moment we start assuming something about another person. What if her relationship hadn’t been going well and she was fighting some internal battle? We never had this conversation, so frankly, I had no idea.
Something I have learned more recently, years after Everest, is that everything is hard to do in solitude. Pursuing your faith…achieving your dreams…It doesn’t matter what you’re trying to do. You need that cornerman by your side. Without him, or in my case, her, there is a pretty good chance you’re either going to be miserable or fail.
RACHEL
The day had finally come. We’d survived Everest and made it through attempt number one of Ranger School. Now I would finally find out if my husband would be coming home to me for good! I was in church that morning when my phone went straight to voice mail. What is up with my phone not ringing during incredibly important moments? I speed-walked out of the church, without causing a major scene, and listened to my voice mail from Harold.
“Right when I’m calling to tell you that I’m coming home to see you, you don’t answer…so…ummm. This is your husband, and I will be seeing you in three days! I got a GO [Ranger School lingo for passing]! And I love you so much! And I can’t wait! I’m so excited to finally see you! So, I’m gonna call you later today, uh, so try to keep your phone on you if you can. But I am coming home to see you for good, so I can’t wait to be in your arms and to kiss you and to hold you. I love you so much!”
22
The Next Adventure
RACHEL
After nearly a year of feeling like I was always holding my breath, I finally had the security I’d been so desperate for. I allowed a flood of emotions to pour out as I finally let go of holding it all together. I collapsed into the comfort of having Harold home again, no longer fearing for his life at every moment or waiting for the phone to ring with bad news. On top of that, I had formed a community of people through YouTube who cared about my life, who had watched my highs and lows through the 463 videos I had uploaded. We call them our Earls Fam because that’s what they’ve become to us: family.
Now that there was more stability in our lives, I was more eager than ever for our family to grow. Since I hadn’t gotten pregnant before Everest or Ranger School, I started to question if I would be able to get pregnant at all. I was painfully aware of how many couples struggle to conceive, and the what-ifs were often in my thoughts: What if something is wrong? What if this never happens for us? I pushed these thoughts to the back of my mind and instead blamed all those not-pregnant tests on bad timing.
By November, I wasn’t the only one anxious about when we would get pregnant. Everyone knew we had been trying since February. Earlier in the year, I’d sent my brother a letter in the mail, and after opening it, he texted me to tell me how excited he got when he saw it. He could have sworn it was a pregnancy announcement. It wasn’t.
We took Harold’s mom and sister out to dinner one night, and after we finished eating and got in the car, they both looked at us and laughed because the whole time we were eating, they were expecting us to tell them “the big news” at any moment. Unfortunately, it just wasn’t happening for us.
I had been tracking everything like a hawk, and right before Thanksgiving, I was two days late. Since Harold and I were actively trying to get pregnant, we talked about every little detail related to it and the timing. This made it significantly harder to hide if I was pregnant, and I wanted to surprise him in a special way.
HAROLD
I had no idea how hard it was to get pregnant before this. We went all-out Army mission on this thing. We had a calendar tracking our best windows of opportunity for the month. And I was watching Rachel for any sign or symptom that our mission was successful. Anytime she made a comment about her stomach hurting, I thought, She must be pregnant! Only ate one brownie instead of three? Food aversion: she must be pregnant. Ate five brownies instead of three? Eating for two: a dead giveaway! That’s odd—she seems to be sitting on the couch a little more than yesterday. Clearly fatigue. Yep, done deal! She’s gotta be preggers.
RACHEL
I wasn’t at all surprised when Harold noticed the timing and straight up asked me if I was pregnant. I had so much hope that I was finally pregnant, since by now Harold’s body had recovered from Ranger School and Everest. I thought for sure his hormones would be back to normal and that our timing had been perfect. So I lied. I put on my best acting performance and told him I wasn’t pregnant. I still hadn’t taken a pregnancy test because I didn’t want to take it too early and disappoint myself, but I was pretty sure it was finally our time.
I woke up on Thanksgiving morning anxious but so excited. I pulled out a test, did my business, and waited three minutes. And there it was: one single pink line. I wasn’t pregnant. Ah, that moment sucked. I didn’t understand, and I felt so discouraged. I imagined that moment so differently. I had even thought about how perfect the timing was because we would be with both our families on Thanksgiving and could tell them in person. That was a really hard day.
As if the past year hadn’t been stressful enough, Harold received orders that we would be heading to Fort Stewart, Georgia, in a few months and that the unit he would be joining, 1-30th Infantry, was scheduled to deploy that August. The news of Harold’s pending deployment was like a left hook out of nowhere. We were finally standing on two feet again and BAM! Life was throwing us right back down. I had already lived through so many fears about getting pregnant back when Harold was leaving for Everest, and now I was adding even more to the list.
What if we don’t get pregnant before he leaves?
Then it would be at least three years from when we started trying, and that’s assuming we get pregnant soon after
he returns.
What if we do get pregnant and he misses the birth? Do I really want to go through that alone?
Month after month with no pregnancy was crushing my spirits. All I could think was, When will the timing ever be right? It was obvious that things were not working out according to my timeline, but all I could really do was trust that God’s timing was better than mine. Nothing would stop us from the one thing we wanted more than anything: growing our family. It was just a matter of how and when, and for those answers we turned to God for clarity and peace.
We had already learned that in the darkest and most difficult times, God is still there.
Remember how Harold was sure God had this grand plan for him to meet his wife in some crazy way? Well, naturally, he felt the same way about us getting pregnant. This time, he had it in his mind that I would be pregnant by Christmas.
I had seen my fair share of negative tests by the holiday season. I knew all too well the lingering empty feelings after a negative test. Taking a pregnancy test for the first time when you’re trying to get pregnant is exciting. Taking a pregnancy test when you’ve seen the same negative result over and over is terrifying and anxiety ridden. The last thing I wanted was for anything to take away my joy on Christmas, especially after having such a blue Thanksgiving.
I decided I wasn’t going to take a test, but on Christmas Eve, I had a change of heart. I was in full disbelief seeing that second pink line for the first time. After many prayers of thanksgiving, several hours of planning, and four positive pregnancy tests later, I was ready to give Harold the best Christmas he had ever had. Of course, I decided to film everything. This moment not only changed our family forever but also launched my YouTube channel to new heights as our pregnancy announcement video went viral.
HAROLD
There was no doubt in my mind she was pregnant. I mean, I was still pretty sure she had been pregnant for a while and was just waiting to tell me on Christmas. By this point, we’d also had a lot of practice making a baby together, which had to have helped our chances in some way.
Rachel woke me up at six on Christmas morning, wide awake, and we took turns opening presents. With each one, my mind was racing.
Maybe this is it…Shoot, just a pair of socks.
“Aw, thanks, hunny, for the socks.”
I picked up another present. Oh man, this present is oddly shaped. I bet this is how she’s going to tell me…Nope, just a mug.
When I opened the last present, I started to get down. I was bummed. Then she said she had one more present she wanted to give me.
Praise Jesus, hallelujah, this it! This is it! This is it!
Turns out it was a present from her parents. A computer monitor.
We got up off the floor and gave our puppies their presents, and then she walked closer to me. Hugging me and looking into my eyes with a sweet smile, Rachel spoke in her cute voice she uses only with me.
“I think there might be one more gift for you.”
She gave me a kiss, said she hadn’t wrapped it, pulled my Santa hat down over my eyes, then walked me back into our room to wait for a few minutes. She came back and grabbed my hand, leading me back into the family room. I made some stupid comments asking if it was a new couch or maybe a La-Z-Boy, trying not to get my hopes up again. But then I heard our wedding song playing, and I knew something was up. My heart started racing.
I pulled the Santa hat back up to uncover my eyes and looked down to see a small baby onesie with a note that said “Merry Christmas, DAD!” I immediately threw my arms around Rachel, my voice and body shaking. “Hunny! I’m gonna be a dad? I’m gonna be a dad! I love you! Are you serious?” After a challenging year of hardships, growth, and being worlds apart, the day we had dreamed about, prayed about, and been trying for had finally come.
WE WERE PREGGERS!!!*
* Watch our pregnancy announcement at Earls.org/baby.
Epilogue
RACHEL
On September 8, 2017, we welcomed baby Leo into the world. My pregnancy turned out to be a mountain of its own, as I endured unusual chronic back pain. Everyday things such as sitting, standing, and driving would often leave me in tears.
After giving birth, I learned I have degenerative disc disease. Though my pregnancy was one of the hardest seasons I’ve been through, I felt closer to understanding Jesus’s sacrificial love than I ever had before.
Having both my husband and my son is a blessing I’ll never take for granted. I finally have the family I’d always prayed for. Parenting is another trek into the unknown, full of triumphs and fears, but that’s a whole other adventure (or book!).
Our pregnancy announcement video ended up going viral and was viewed more than six million times on YouTube, fifty-one million times on Facebook, and fourteen million times on China’s social platforms. It was even featured on DailyMail.com. The love and excitement between us was quite literally felt around the world. From there, my YouTube channel took off. I now have over half a million people who follow our life journey.
In 2018, we started the Earls Family Foundation to give back to our online community, hoping to make a deep and tangible difference in our followers’ lives. This had been a goal of mine from the very beginning, and once I shared it with Harold, he was all in!
We have an amazing volunteer staff, led by Harold’s sister, Liz, who all have a passion for serving others. With their invaluable support, in our very first year we were able to give back over $20,000 to our community through twenty-seven different projects, blessing nearly thirty families. Projects ranged from giving Christmas presents, covering the cost of a service uniform, providing a washing machine to a family in need, awarding scholarships for higher education, and so much more!*
We’ve moved four times in four years. Harold served as an airborne Ranger–qualified light infantry platoon leader and was then selected to lead a battalion’s scout and sniper platoon at Fort Stewart, Georgia. He was next promoted to captain, and we are currently living in Washington, DC, where he serves as the Commander of the Guard of Honor at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in Arlington National Cemetery. He absolutely loves his job and tells me just how much every day when he comes home.
Harold has always been about challenging himself, and being the commander at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier has certainly provided that opportunity. The guards are tasked by Congress to maintain the highest standards and traditions of the United States Army and of our nation, all while keeping a constant vigil guarding our country’s most hallowed ground. His job makes for some early mornings and long evenings, but we continue to make the most of the time we do have together. It is inspiring to see the deep love he has for our country and his Soldiers, and I am always so proud of him.
I gave birth to our second son, Wyatt, on May 23, 2019. I still struggle with back issues, but there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for our children. Between the four of us and our two dogs, our home is always a little crazy and a lot of fun! I can’t say it’s easy, but these truly are the best years of my life. We are already making plans for baby number three, fingers crossed and God willing! Harold wants twins, but I told him my body can’t handle that!
We’re not sure what our next adventure will be, but we do know we’re in it together. If we can survive Everest and come out stronger, with greater faith and fiercer love, then we can do anything.
* Check out Earlsfam.org to see more.
Mount Everest view from Base Camp, with the high camps and technical steps labeled. Camps not visible below Camp Two are, in order: Base Camp, Interim Camp, Advanced Base Camp, and Camp One. Photo credit: iStock by Getty Images
One of the few pictures from the night we met, featuring none other than Rachel’s baggy camo T-shirt.
The receipt Harold signed the day we started dating.
Harold and mentor CSM Todd Burnett hanging out together at a baseball game at West Point. Photo credit: Mark Aikman
Shenanigans on a beach trip to celebrate our one-year dating anniversary.
Moments after Harold proposed to Rachel at a Chi Omega “candlelight.”
Photo credit: Kelsey Marie Photography
Harold playing ball in Tampa, Florida, during spring break in 2014—just two months after we got engaged.
Right after Harold tossed his cap in the air at his West Point graduation (May 23, 2015).
Walking into our wedding reception. Photo credit: Terri Clark Photography
Rachel in shock after reaching a huge milestone: her first one thousand subscribers on YouTube.
Telling each other goodbye at the airport, right before Harold left for Everest.
Harold and Tommy at the airport before departing for Nepal to begin the two-month expedition.
Resting with other Summit Climb teammates on an acclimation climb up the long snow slope toward Camp Two.
Harold approaching the death zone on his way to Camp Three.
A Higher Calling Page 18