by Alana Khan
“Your brother is bleeding.” I see the exertion did him in and he’s soundly asleep, possibly back in a coma.
“How did this happen?” His eyes are searching mine for answers.
“He was trying to worship at my feet. Somehow I think you will understand this better than I do.”
He shrugs, but his eyes slide guiltily from mine.
Dr. Drayke comes in at a run, and whatever he was doing a minute ago is now on the back burner of his mind, because he’s already fully in doctor mode. He gently prods Braxx’s back, then grabs his pad to perform a medscan.
“What happened?”
“He got out of bed before I could stop him.”
He clicks his teeth.
Fuck you, Dr. Drayke. Why am I the one to get all the responsibility and all the blame? But of course, I don’t say that.
“With all that blood I thought I’d have to program the medbot to do revision surgery. But the bleeding is already slowing. I think we’re good. I’ll have to keep a closer eye on things.”
“Good idea, Dr. Drayke. Perhaps you could check in a little more frequently,” I scold him pointedly.
“You’re absolutely right, Brianna. I’m going to rig a feed from the medbay computer to the one in my room. I’ll stay on top of things better until the worst of the bonding urge is over.”
“Not exactly what I was asking for, but I guess it will do,” I don’t even attempt to hide the irritation in my tone.
“I’m certain I speak for the twins as well as myself when I thank you for all your efforts.” He glances at the exit as if he can’t get out of here fast enough. “Feed him broth and bread as often as he’ll take it. Don’t hesitate to call me if there’s another emergency. I’ll check on him tomorrow.” And....he’s out the door.
Axxios
“You have some explaining to do, Axx. Don’t make me pull it out of you.”
Her nostrils flare and her hands fist at her sides. I’ve never seen her this angry, even yesterday when she gave me that ultimatum.
I put my hands up in a self-protective motion. “Ask and I’ll answer, but I don’t know what’s wrong.”
Her green eyes are full of fire as she approaches me and pokes me in the chest with her index finger. “I’ll give you hints: angels, twins, fathers, and a fucking governors’ mansion.”
I lean down and rub my hand over my face. “Mythrian twins have a special bond, Brianna. I’ve told you this before.”
“Yeah, Axx. On Earth, twins have a special bond. I’ve heard tales that one twin will know when another twin is injured—just like you and Braxx. On. Earth. People. Don’t. Have. Two. Fathers!”
“I didn’t know that. You told me you had twins on Earth. I assumed things were the same with your species.”
“Are you acting stupid on purpose, Axx? Why would you assume that?”
“For the same reason you assumed people only have one father, Brie.”
“Don’t call me Brie. I’m Brianna to you,” her tone is more hurt than angry. “I’m sorry for calling you stupid, that’s shitty of me.”
“So you’re mad I didn’t mention my fathers?”
“I feel ridiculous that we spent all that time in enforced intimacy and the only thing I know about you is…” Her face burns red. She does that when she talks about sex.
“There’s nothing about our chemistry we should be ashamed of Brie...anna.”
“Everybody on your planet has two fathers?”
“Yes. Twins pair with one female. I believe I mentioned that if my twin were dead it would affect me in many ways. It would mean I’d never be able to have a truebond with a female.”
She sits down heavily in a chair as if her legs just won’t hold her anymore. Her facial muscles are slack, her eyes are closed, and tears are sliding from the corners of her eyes.
I squat next to her so I’m at eye level. I grab her hands and she makes a half-hearted attempt to pull away, but keeps them there. Being this close to her, holding her warm hands in mine, makes my cock hard. But I try to ignore it.
“When we hit puberty our bodies experience cataclysmic changes. The first of the pair to hit a certain hormonal load turns gold, the other becomes silver. But we change in other ways.
“The golden twin becomes...harder, emotionally stronger. When there’s an argument we always win; we’re hormonally programmed to push for what we want. Over a period of five to ten years, as we grow to adulthood, emotions disappear. That’s one of the reasons the loss of my twin devastated me so badly. I hadn’t had to deal with emotions of any kind for over a decade. The only true emotion we feel is toward our brother, our gem.”
“So golden twins become unfeeling hardasses.”
“If you want to put it that way.”
“And the silver twins?”
“As they mature, they retain their emotions. I’ve read some books about it. It makes sense from an evolutionary perspective. There are more than two males for every Mythrian female. Long ago in our history, it became imperative that two males mate with one female. Otherwise male aggression and territoriality would have gotten out of control.
“But putting two combative males together with one female for a lifetime was a recipe for disaster. The pairing of one male with a high sex drive and few emotions with a brother capable of emotional tenderness ensures a high likelihood of happiness in a mating. ”
“So, is that part of the problem with you and me, Axx? Help me understand. It takes three to...connect? You needed your brother around so you could care? About me?” She shakes her head, still confused.
“Golds don’t have tender feelings. I’ve heard of some golds who mellow when they complete their truebond, but it’s uncommon. I should have told you all of this, but it doesn’t change anything. I still can’t give you what you want—at least I couldn’t without Braxxus.”
I give her a serious look, “Mythrian females tend to be very content in their bond, Brianna. Their emotional and physical needs are fulfilled through different legs of the triad.”
She gives me full eye contact, and I’m elated. I’m confident she fully understands. Perhaps if she likes Braxxus, she would consider being our bondmate. I could see that match working well for her and it would please me greatly.
“Get the fuck out.” Her eyes bore into me so belligerently, if they were lasers I’d be dead.
“If you’re not out in ten seconds, Axx, I’m leaving.” Her jaw is so tight her lips barely moved when she spoke.
I’ve only hesitated half a modicum more when she slips one foot into a shoe.
“Okay. I’m gone,” I say as I speed to beat her out the door. I may never understand Earth females. What did I say wrong?
Chapter Five
Brianna
If I wasn’t so concerned about waking Braxx, I’d be kicking the metal basin around the floor like a soccer ball. I’m so angry I could spontaneously combust, and I don’t know what to do with all that energy. I read somewhere you could dig your nails into a bar of soap to express your anger, but there’s only a liquid soap dispenser. The same article said you could tear up a phone book; too bad those have gone the way of MySpace and the VCR.
I slip into the tiny attached bathroom, shuck my clothes, and step into a freezing cold shower. Wow! That’s awful, who came up with that idea as a coping mechanism? I turn up the temp and scrub myself as hard as I can bear.
I’m so pissed I can’t think. All I can do is chant, “Fuck him,” over and over in my head. Ten gallons of water later, my skin is pink, bordering on red, and I’ve calmed down enough for other words to begin to seep into my thoughts.
Anger. Betrayal. Hurt. Confusion. Impotence.
They’re all shitty feelings. I don’t know which is worse. Yes, I do, actually—impotence. There’s nothing I can do. Having a better understanding of why he’s an asshole doesn’t make him less of an asshole. And it doesn’t make me better equipped to deal with his assholery.
Oh, add “bitter,” to my lit
any of feelings. But I always come back to pissed. It’s the easiest emotion to tolerate; it’s motivating. I could dream up a hundred ideas for revenge. That would keep me busy and I wouldn’t have to experience all those other crappy emotions.
My shower’s cold now and I haven’t turned down the heat. Rumor has it there’s a governor on these things to keep anyone from using too much water. Water’s like gold on a vessel; I knew better than to waste it.
I dress, change Braxx’s bandage, feed him some soup, and watch several episodes of a shitty nature show about white bears on an ice planet, all while having a very angry conversation with Axxios in my mind. How is it that I’m conducting both sides of the conversation and I’m still losing?
~.~
Hours later I’m startled awake. My eyes fly open to find Braxxus staring at me with those beautiful turquoise eyes.
“You okay, Braxxus?”
“Mmm-hmmm,” he nods, a serious expression on his handsome face.
He’s been asleep for hours, I check his back then warm him some leftover soup.
Even though he’s shoving the food in his mouth as fast as a person can without inhaling it, he hasn’t taken his eyes off me.
“I’m not an angel, Braxxus. I don’t even know why you think I am.”
He tips the mug up and swallows the last of the broth. “I’ve seen your picture since I was five. I’ve memorized every curve of your face, the color of your hair, the arch of your eyebrow. When I was ten I took art lessons so I could draw you, then paint you. You’ve always been my angel—our angel.” He penetrates me with a look I can’t describe, like he wants to dive into me—join me under my skin.
I shake my head. “Braxxus, I still don’t understand.”
“Our fathers became governors when Axx and I were five. The governors’ mansion was even finer than the house we grew up in; almost every room had murals on the walls and ceilings. Our bedroom was huge, and the domed ceiling was painted with angels. None were silver, gray, or gold like the Mythrian people, their skin was like yours.
“Axx and I would lie on our backs on the plush carpet and make up stories about the angels in the pictures. We created very interesting lives and relationships and heroic tales about the dozens of individuals depicted on our ceiling. And you, Br…”
He stops, eyes widening in fear, then, making a conscious effort, says my name, “Brianna, your story was always the same. You would come down from your cloud to Mythros and fall in love with us and become our bondmate. Axx and I wove many stories about you and us. We had imaginary children and hundreds of adventures together.
“There were many beautiful females on that mural, but it was never them we loved, never them we bonded with. Never them we had adventures with. It was always you.”
His eyes have never left mine. He’s totally sincere.
I nod while I think of a nice way to tell him how ridiculous this is. Strategy number one—don’t use the word ridiculous.
“You’d never seen an Earth person before. Maybe my coloring is the same as the female in the painting. But it’s not me, Braxxus. I’m just the closest person you’ve ever seen to what was in that painting.” There, that should change his mind.
“I filled over ten sketch pads with your face. I’m intimately acquainted with the tilt of your head, the sparkle in your eye, the curve of your breast. I’ve been in love with you for thirty years, Brianna.” He spears me with the warmest, most sincere, most heartfelt gaze one person could bestow upon another. Then he must realize the heavy import of his info dump, because his eyes slide from mine.
Holy shit, he didn’t just say that. But the sincerity on his face, the timbre of his voice—he did just say it. In fact, this moment was so poignant, so deeply heartfelt, I’ll be able to recite that speech, word for word fifty years from now.
“You don’t know me, Braxx. You fell in love with an angel you didn’t know, and trust me, I’m no angel. I’m a person, a very flawed one at that. Now that you know me, you’ll figure that out real quick.”
“I heard you talk to me when I was in a coma. Some of your words floated into my brain. Everything you said was kind and caring.”
“Well, yeah. I’m nice—most of the time. But still, you don’t know me.”
“I felt your touch. You bathed me every day. Your hands were soft; your touch was tender. You cared for me without resentment.”
“That’s what I do...did for a living back home. It’s the way I was trained.”
“You can’t be trained to care like that. Don’t you see? It’s even better if you’re not an angel. You’re a real female, and you were always meant for Axx and me.”
I pluck the mug from his hand and set it on his bedside table, then give him a warm washcloth to clean his hands and face.
“Enough Braxx. You’ve tired me out. I can’t argue with you for one more second.” I crawl into bed and lie on my side, away from him. “Computer, lights out.”
Braxxus
Maybe she’s right. I guess she’s not an angel. But someone painted her face on the ceiling of our bedroom. Out of all the beings depicted there, it was her face that called to Axx and me. And after Axx became golden, it was me who kept the idea of her alive. I’m the one who nurtured her memory, first in my sketchpad and then in my heart. When I lay dying on Aeon II, it was her face that haunted my dreams. It was thoughts of her that made me try to stay alive when I was ready to give up.
~.~
Axxios
Dr. Drayke told me I could bring sumra for Braxx’s breakfast. Warm noodles in a sweet, milky sauce. It’s a common dish all over the galaxy.
I’ve never cooked before, but I remember watching my mother in excited anticipation as she made our favorite breakfast dish. With a little help from Maddie, this tastes a lot like it came from my mother’s kitchen.
My hands are full with the tray, which is heaped with tea and bread and butter and sumra; I shoulder open the medbay door.
Brianna’s up, her movements brisk as she rolls Braxx onto his side and by some sleight of hand makes his bed with clean sheets with him still in it. She’s bustling, her back stiff. She gives me no eye contact, nor will she look at my brother. She’s upset, not just with me, but with him. I wonder what’s going on, but I’m sure she’ll blast me with the truth within one minima.
“Sumra,” I announce, pretending I’m not walking into a minefield, “just like our mother used to make.”
I set a huge, steaming bowl in front of Braxx. “Brianna? I think you’ll like it.” Smiling, I hold up a bowl toward her. It’s coming, I can see by the thunderous look on her face. I hunch my shoulders as if to ward off a physical blow.
“Axxios, tell him I’m not an angel.” She blasts me with a hard glare as she bundles all the dirty sheets in a pile.
“Braxx, you know she’s not an angel.” While her back is turned to the dirty laundry tube I give him the look I used to give him when we were kids. The look that said ‘whatever you do, don’t admit it to Mom.’
“I thought she was for a few hoaras yesterday,” he says so loudly it’s as if he thinks she’s hard of hearing. “Now I know that’s not it at all. The painting was just a sign to tell us we’d found our bondmate.”
Drack. I’d cradle my head in my hands if they weren’t still occupied with bowls of food. “Seriously, Braxx?” I hiss under my breath.
“Why can’t we talk about it? It’s got to be true—it was an omen.” He looks innocent and curious, as if he was a child who just put a piece of cake in the punchbowl to see if it would float and doesn’t understand why all the adults are furious.
Brianna still has her back to us, but her reflection in the mirror above the sink shows her cheeks are flaming pink like they used to be when our masters ordered us to mate.
“Braxx is obviously recuperating. Let’s organize shifts for the others to watch him. I have a lot of...reading to catch up on in my room,” her words are clipped; eye contact is non-existent.
“Dr. Dra
yke contacted me this morning, told me Braxx’s vitals are strong and stable and said if it stays that way he can go to his own room tomorrow.” I walk over to her and stick my face in front of hers. “One more day, Brie...anna? He hasn’t been unkind, has he?”
I don’t need to ask if he’s been improper. I know that’s not true.
“It’s just so freaking awkward.” She sits near his bed and grabs her bowl of sumra. “Delicious. You made this? I didn’t take you for the domestic type.” She laughs. She’s sexy when she smiles.