Luke’s text on Tuesday afternoon didn’t offer any specifics, only indicating that I shouldn’t worry, and he is working on a plan. I texted back asking him to elaborate, but he said it was too early to discuss.
That was two days ago, and the anticipation of what Luke is up to is proving to be as distracting as Amelia is today. She woke up with a low-grade fever and a sore throat and with no one else available I kept her with me. After resting at home this morning, she was feeling well enough for me to bring her to work with me for a little while. Linda loves when I bring her in, but I don’t get a lot done with her here. Nonetheless, squeezing in a couple of hours’ worth of work will be better than nothing, even if they aren’t the most productive.
“I’m sorry, but we’re not in a position to extend your terms. We did that six months ago under the condition that you would get your account up to date, which never happened. Your account is nearly ninety days past due.” I hate making collection calls, fortunately I don’t have to do it very often, except with this customer. Ryan does some consulting for a smaller startup winery in the valley, splitting the money earned with the winery. It’s a pain to manage, especially when the owner is strapped for cash and I have to chase down payment every month. I’m listening to the owner prattle on about his cash flow issues, things I hear every month, when I hear the outside door to our office open.
“Well, hello there.” Linda sounds more chipper than normal.
“Good morning. Here, this is for you.” His voice is unmistakable. My heart starts to race when I remember Amelia is here, too. “I didn’t expect to see you here today.”
“Luke!” Amelia practically screams.
“Nice to see they finally hired an assistant for Linda. When did you start?” I can hear the smile in Luke’s voice.
Amelia giggles. “I’m sick, so mom brought me with her today. After she’s finished all her work, we’re going to get ice cream. Want to come?”
Amelia’s missed Luke. Part of me warms hearing the two of them together, but I also worry it’s not the smartest idea. Amelia thrived during the divorce, but I still carry a lot of guilt. Removing Luke from her life was another blow that I wish wouldn’t have happened.
“I wish I could, but I have meetings this afternoon.” Luke lowers his voice to a loud whisper. “Did you ever take your mom to our favorite place?”
“No. I’ll see if she wants to go there today.”
“Are you going to get orange honey again?”
Amelia giggles again. “I get it every time.”
“Are you ever going to try a new flavor?”
“Probably not, I like that one too much.”
Luke laughs. “Fine. When you go, tell your mom to try the chocolate lavender. She’ll like that one.”
I realize the owner is done pleading his case, the one I haven’t been listening to, the one I already have memorized from our previous conversations. “I’m sorry, Larry, but you need to get me some sort of payment by the end of next week or we won’t be able to send Ryan out to consult this month.”
“All right. I’ll make it happen, don’t cancel Ryan’s visit,” Larry gives in.
“By next Friday.” I reassert my position as Luke walks in my office and sits down across from me.
“Next Friday, got it. Thanks, Jessica,” Larry says sincerely.
“Thanks, Larry.” I hang up the phone.
“You look tired.” Luke looks bright eyed and bushy tailed this morning as he hands me a paper cup. Amelia runs into my office.
“It’s before ten.” I take a sip of the chai tea.
“Mom, you didn’t tell me Luke was here.” She frowns at me like I’ve been keeping a secret from her.
“I didn’t know. Hey, Luke and I have business to discuss, can you go hang out with Linda for a few minutes?”
Amelia frowns at me again.
Luke playfully taps her arm. “After we’re done, if it’s okay with your mom, you can walk with me up to the tasting room to deliver some paperwork.”
“Can I?” My heart clenches when her eyes light up.
“Sure,” I say, not confident I’m making a good choice.
Amelia returns to Linda’s portion of the office and Luke quietly shuts the door to my office.
“Thank you for this.” I raise my cup.
“You’re welcome. She’s sick?” Luke looks concerned.
“Just a virus. She’s obviously full of energy and up for ice cream, so I think she’ll be fine.” I take a quick sip of tea. “What brings you to the winery today?”
Luke fidgets in his seat. “I have news. News you should hear from me first.”
My heart races and in a split second I start to mentally prepare for every worst-case scenario I can think of. I stop when I realize he looks really happy. “What’s the news?”
“I’m buying the winery.” He takes a sip of his coffee.
Those words were not part of my mental preparedness and I find myself at a loss for words. I stare at Luke blankly trying to come up with a proper emotion.
Thankfully, he starts talking again. “I don’t know why I didn’t warm up to this idea sooner.” Luke smiles like this is the best plan he’s ever had.
“Luke, you’re a venture capitalist, not a winery owner.” I tread carefully.
“I know, but I’m a quick learner.” He shrugs.
“And Aaron’s onboard with this?” I try a different angle.
“Aaron’s not part of this. This is my deal.”
I remind myself to breathe. “I thought we agreed this place needs a present, actively involved owner? Don’t take this the wrong way, but I think Mrs. Bianchi wanted to turn this place over to someone with hospitality experience.”
Luke sets his cup down. “It was actually Mrs. Bianchi’s idea. I told her I wasn’t interested at first, that I don’t know anything about running a winery, but she was very encouraging. The more I thought about it, it’s really what I want. I was already looking for ways to reduce my travel, to work a more traditional schedule, be more present for Finn.”
Oh, dear lord, this isn’t good. “Luke, this is crazy. You can’t just decide you want to buy a winery.”
“Actually, I can.” Luke shrugs again. “I have on offer on my apartment, so now I’ll just have to find something here, probably closer to San Diego.” Luke listed his apartment after we got engaged. I assumed he had pulled it off the market, but in the chaos of the breakup and everything else I never bothered to ask.
“Why San Diego?” I spit out the questions flooding my brain. “What about Finn? You can’t spend more time with him if you’re down here.” I realize the answer before Luke says it. Finn won’t be in San Francisco.
Luke looks at me thoughtfully. “Claire mentioned a few months ago that she had an opportunity to transfer to her company’s office in San Diego. We talked this week and she found out the position is still available. She’ll be moving in a month. It’s kind of amazing how all the pieces have come together.”
I try to process it all, but the fact that Luke is looking at me like I should be happier than I am is distracting.
“I know it’s a lot to take in, but this is a good thing, for everyone,” Luke states confidently.
“Is it?” I mumble, and lean back in my chair.
“We can talk more about this later.” Luke stands up.
“Where are you going?” I blurt out.
“Mrs. Bianchi’s office to drop off the contract. I think she’s going to make an announcement later today or tomorrow.”
No! Stop! Don’t! I scream in my head, but my mouth doesn’t move. There’s nothing I can say to stop this. Luke has made up his mind and is clearly thrilled with his decision, there will be no convincing him otherwise.
“Smile, Jess. This is a good thing.” Luke tosses me a reassuring smile and leaves my o
ffice. “Ready, kiddo?”
“Yep.” I hear Amelia jump from her seat and follow Luke out the door.
I hide at my desk for the next two hours, trying to calm my nerves. I go so far as to fake being on a phone call when Luke returns Amelia. Around noon I take Amelia to get ice cream at the place her and Luke were discussing. It’s all homemade and the chocolate lavender flavor is delicious.
I receive texts all afternoon from Linda, Ryan and Monica after Mrs. Bianchi makes the announcement about Luke becoming the new owner. I answer them calmly, reassuring them that Luke will do a great job, but my stomach is in knots. Amelia and I curl up on the couch and watch movies, both attempting to feel better.
Amelia’s fever spikes in the evening, so I give her more medicine and put her to bed early. I sit in the quiet house and face my thoughts about today’s events.
First, I think about Mrs. Bianchi. Selling this place is emotional for her and this is probably as good of a solution as she’s going to get. She’s fond of Luke, but more than that, she trusts him.
Luke seems really excited and his lack of experience isn’t as worrisome as it may be with someone else. He’ll figure out how to run the winery. He’s built that way, he’ll work hard and be eager to learn all he can. Failing isn’t something Luke takes lightly.
The real question that’s haunted my afternoon remains. How does this affect me?
I grab my laptop off the island and turn it on, the glow from the screen illuminating the dark room. I stare at the screen while I think.
With the deal finalized, the Bianchis are officially out of the winery. Their move to Texas is scheduled for a week from Monday. Mrs. Bianchi will be in and out of the office next week, and then the next week she’ll be gone. This place won’t be the same without her. I won’t be the same without her here.
I type out the email and reread it once to make sure I’ve kept it professional. I stare at it for a long time, debating whether I really want to send it or not.
Working with Luke has been better lately, but it’s always going to be difficult. Everything with us seems to be. I have too many feelings for him, good and bad. The fact that I still find myself wishing things were different between us is painful and often confusing. Seeing him on a limited basis has been somewhat manageable. Having to work with him, see him, on a daily basis would be an unnecessary level of punishment.
I take a deep breath and with one click of a button, the email is sent. Nothing to do now except await the aftermath.
Chapter 14
The pounding at the door prompts me to set down my bowl of cereal and turn off the movie I’m only halfway through. I was hoping he wouldn’t read the email until he was on the plane back to San Francisco tonight.
I don’t bother to look through the peephole. I open the door to find my new, very angry boss glaring at me. “Hi, Luke.”
“What the hell is this?” He holds up his phone as if I need reminding about the email I sent him only a couple of hours ago.
I sigh and step aside. “Keep your voice down, Amelia’s sleeping.”
Luke storms past me toward the kitchen. Once there, he places both palms on the island and leans forward as I rest against the counter on the opposite side.
“Well?” he asks, even though it’s clear he’s not going to like any answer I’m going to provide to him.
“Don’t make this harder than it needs to be.” I cross my arms across my chest.
“I’m making things harder?” Luke widens his eyes at me.
“Luke, you had to know this was coming. By the way, you showing up here, after business hours, to yell at me about something work related is exactly why this could never work.” I wave my hand back and forth between us as I try to appeal to his sensible, business side.
“Is that why you’re quitting? You don’t like the idea of me being your boss?”
“Of course I don’t like the idea of you being my boss,” I say matter-of-factly. “Did you think I would?”
Luke rubs the back of his neck. “I thought we reached a good place in our working relationship.”
“We have, but we’ve only been required to interact with each other for moments every week or so. Working together on a daily basis would be different.”
“Once the shock wears off, you’ll realize this is a good solution. The winery gets an owner dedicated to its success, I get to spend more time with my son, and you get to stay at the company you love.” Luke’s chin is raised slightly, his jaw set.
“I don’t belong there anymore.” I plant my feet and straighten my stance.
“Like hell you don’t.” Luke’s anger flashes for a moment, but he composes himself quickly. His Adam’s apple moves as he swallows. “I don’t want to run the winery without…a controller.”
I shift my weight to one foot. “I’ll stay on until you find my replacement.”
Luke doesn’t say anything immediately and I wait for his frustration to be unleashed. Instead, he looks at me with a scrunched brow and keeps his voice calm. “Is this because I’ve never run a winery before? Mrs. Bianchi seems to have confidence I’m capable.”
“No, I’m sure you’ll do great,” I concede, his reaction confusing me. I expected to argue, not to tap into some insecurity hiding below Luke’s confident exterior.
“Isn’t this what we all wanted? For someone to come in and run the place with the same vision the Bianchis had. I’m going to do that. This decision was about me and what I wanted, but that doesn’t mean you can’t reap the benefits as well. The winery has been important to you for years.” Luke runs a hand through his hair. “Besides, replacing the controller during the middle of all the changes already happening is going to make things even more complicated.”
“I can’t believe Aaron didn’t talk you out of this.” I sigh and shake my head.
“Aaron and I had already begun conversations about me stepping back, although when we first started them it was more about me finding a better balance between work and family, not because I was going to run another business. The plans to get Christina more involved have been in the works since last year.”
Last year he would have been planning for our baby. The sick feeling in my stomach instantly returns. “You’re lucky Claire is willing and able to uproot her whole life for you.” The bitter words escape before I can trap them in my brain where they belong.
Luke tilts his head at me and shakes it. “She’s excited about her work opportunity. She was offered more money and a title increase to make the move.”
“You don’t owe me any explanations.” I stalk off toward the family room.
“What do you want from me, Jessica? I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t. I don’t tell you what’s going on and you don’t trust me. I do tell you and I’m an asshole for bringing it up.” There’s confusion in his voice and when I turn around, he’s rubbing his forehead. “We’re not together, but we’re not merely business associates. I don’t know at this point what I should share with you and what I shouldn’t.” He looks at me like he’s waiting for me to tell him what to do. He looks more helpless than angry.
It’s the moment I realize he’s right, I wouldn’t have been happy either way. “I don’t know, either, Luke.” I try to swallow the lump in my throat. “I feel like I want to know, but every time you mention her, I get this hollow feeling in my stomach and no matter how hard I try, no matter how badly I wish it away, it’s still there.” My voice catches on the last word and I struggle to hold back the emotions brewing inside.
Luke takes a cautious step toward me and I squeeze my eyes shut, willing them not to release any tears. I startle when he wraps his arms around me, but he doesn’t let go, instead he holds me tighter.
“Tell me, Jess.” He rests his chin on top of my head. “Tell me how I can make this better for you.”
“You can’t.” I gently push away fr
om him and wipe my eyes. I don’t tell him how desperately I want him to. “Please don’t fight me on this, Luke. I need to move on.”
Luke’s arms fall limply at his sides and he lets out a big exhale. He studies me with concerned eyes. Finally, he says, “give me six months.”
“For what?”
“To get my bearings. By then I’ll have a better game plan and more knowledge. At the very least, I’ll be in a better position to hire a new controller.” He tilts his head at me. “Come on, Jess, six months to make sure Bianchi Winery gets a proper new start.”
I hate to admit it, but he’s right. I don’t owe this to him, but I do owe the Bianchis. “I’ll give you six months.”
Luke nods and swallows hard. “Thank you.”
“And then you’ll let me go?” I ask, my voice small.
“Then I let you go.” His voice is thick and his eyes hold mine momentarily before looking away. “It’s late, I should leave.”
“Okay.” I move toward the door and Luke follows.
“Tell Amelia I hope she feels better.”
“I will.” I open the front door and Luke walks past me.
He stops in the doorway and I think he may turn around to say something else, but he remains facing the street. “Good night, Jessica.”
“Good night, Luke.”
“Hello, ladies.” Emily slides into the booth Vivien and I have been occupying for the last thirty minutes.
Vivien glances at her phone. “You’re late, even for you.”
“I know, I’m sorry. Rob asked me to help him pack. I texted you.”
Vivien and I finally got to meet Rob a couple of weeks ago. He was friendly and funny and we both instantly liked him. Emily practically beamed when we both told her we thought he was a good match for her.
“Another work trip?” I ask.
“Yeah. He’s meeting with some bigwigs at the corporate office. I don’t know, some meetings about the project he’s been working on.” Emily shrugs before raising her arm to wave down a waitress. “Glad one of us is successful at being employed.”
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