The Wandering Inn_Volume 1

by Pirateaba

  Rags had her Goblins make more crossbows, as fast as possible. This revealed more problems, mainly in the construction process.

  The materials the Goblins used to make the crossbows were shoddy, old, rusted iron and splintered wood. Two crossbows broke on the first firing and one’s drawstring snapped and nearly blinded the Goblin using it. But they worked.

  By the end of the night, the Goblins had six working crossbows and several Goblins had earned the [Tinkerer] class. Rags was internally elated, although she wasn’t sure about the class itself.

  That was the other thing. Goblins had different classes than humans. Weaker ones, Rags suspected. Instead of the [Warrior] class, a Goblin could as easily gain the [Scrapper] class. Instead of [Carpenter], some got [Crafter]. And [Tinkerer]. She was sure there was a better class that would replace it if she gained enough levels.

  It went something like this. [Scrapper] became [Warrior] at Level 5 or thereabouts. And if you reached Level 20, Rags had heard some Goblins gained a different class and new skills.

  She desperately wanted to level for herself and find out. But it was better, yes, far better to think of her tribe’s competency in battle first.

  Rags’ internal [Tactician] was going wild at the thought of using the crossbows. They had good range, and unlike slings, they could be loaded and left alone until they were needed. Rags could open any battle with a volley and let the less-able combatants pelt her enemy while her warriors engaged at close range.

  Yes, they could be a game-changer. Rags wanted these new crossbows in the hands of every one of her Goblins. Rags had visions of sixty Goblins firing all at once. What could they kill with that? The Rock Crabs had too much armor, but with these new weapons, they wouldn’t have to kill them. They could hunt birds without worrying about ammunition.

  They could stop eating their dead.

  As for her crossbow, Rags could barely load it even with help from other Goblins. But she was fairly certain that a bolt from that would kill even a bear if she hit it in the eye. It was a weapon fit for a Chief.

  Rags went to sleep that night, head buzzing with thoughts. But at the back of her mind was the knowledge that this was only the first step. She had something—now she needed to turn that into a way to survive her coming trial.

  [Leader Class Obtained!]

  [Leader Level 2!]

  [Skill – Aura of Command Obtained!]

  [Tinkerer Class Obtained!]

  [Tinkerer Level 1!]

  [Skill – Basic Repair Obtained!]

  —-

  The Goblins left their cave the next day. It was a chaotic, messy move, but Rags shouted and used her new Skill to make her Goblins organize themselves much faster than they would have normally. They set out through the snow, skirting dangerous spots, scavenging for wood and deposits of clay to make ammunition for their new weapons.

  It turned out they could use ice for ammunition as well, although only jagged bits of ice and not compacted snow. Rags located an older cave using her Chief’s memories and her Goblins worked all night to make more crossbows. She tested the boom bark by lighting a fire far away outside and sending a Goblin out to toss a roll into it.

  When the Goblins picked themselves off the ground, Rags decided she’d found a very useful trap. But she made sure to bury the bark deep in the snow outside the cave, nevertheless.

  They came to the opening in the side of the mountain the next day. Rags halted her tribe outside, ordering them into loose ranks. By now, she had fourteen crossbows not including her own, and she’d distributed slings and bows among the rest.

  This was it. Rags stared at the small opening and felt her heart racing. Was this the day she died? She’d enter as carefully as possible. If anything dangerous came their way, she’d retreat.

  But she had to level up. Her tribe had to be stronger. That was the truth that had revealed itself to Rags. She wanted to live. So she would dance with death until she did.

  Death or levels. Life or death. She unsheathed her sword and pointed at the small rift in the rock. A hundred feet in, and the place would change. Two hundred and they’d start traveling downwards. Three hundred, and no Goblin would ever return. That was what the memories told her.

  The Goblins tensed, weapons at the ready. Rags inhaled, and then the breath caught in her lungs.

  Something was moving from within the darkness. The Goblins around her froze in terror. Rags lowered her sword and raised her finger. She knew three spells. The [Firefly] spell blazed in her mind.

  Then it appeared. Horror washed over the Goblins, undiluted, pure terror. As the purple flaming eyes touched them, the Goblins and Rags felt fear. The same fear that had come from Skinner.

  Pumping, bony arms. A lithe frame, mainly because there was no meat on it. Light illuminated bone as something dashed out of the darkness, running as fast as he could.

  Rags’ jaw dropped.

  A familiar skeleton charged out of the ruins, pursued by a massive suit of armor. To the Goblins, the armor was even more horrifying because it was clearly made for a Minotaur or something even larger. It was missing its helmet, but the enchanted armor glowed with orange light that shone from seams in the armor and the open hole at the top. It held a massive greatsword raised in both hands as it chased Toren into the snow.

  Rags and her tribe watched Toren run straight towards them. They eyed the magical armor, considered their crossbows. They looked at the armor, at Toren, at each other.

  They screamed as one, and ran.

  S01 - Mating Rituals

  “You have not had sex yet. This is a bad thing, yes?”

  Erin paused with a large forkful of boiled beef and vegetables halfway to her lips. She stared open-mouthed at Krshia and then swiveled her gaze to stare at Selys. The Drake winced and avoided her gaze.

  “Um. Okay?”

  Krshia leaned over the table and regarded Erin intently.

  “It has been weeks since we have known each other. But you have not mated with anyone. This is a bad thing, I am thinking. We must do something about that.”

  “We must?”

  “Hrm. Yes. That is why Selys and I have invited you. It is a matter which we would discuss.”

  “Here?”

  Erin looked around the room. They were in a restaurant. Actually, the restaurant was actually a tavern, but Erin liked to think of it as a restaurant. They were pretty much the same thing, but taverns usually included more drinking.

  This was Gnoll tavern though, which meant most of the customers inside were furry. A few Drakes were present, but the staff and cooks were Gnolls. Krshia had suggested the place and Erin had happily accepted.

  It was rare that Erin got a chance to leave her inn. But business had been slow, Selys had a free day off and Krshia had mentioned the tavern had good food. So Erin had locked Toren in the inn, joined up with the other two, and come here. They’d spent a fun few minutes talking and ordering food – bloody mutton for Krshia, breaded fish for Selys, and boiled beef for Erin. The food had arrived they’d begun to eat, and then sex had happened.

  Not literal sex, but the thing about even discussing sex was that it did odd things to the mind. Erin stared down at her beef, sitting in a light marinade of broth. It was soft and practically fell apart on her spoon. It looked and smelled delicious, but suddenly Erin was imagining sausages. For no particular reason, of course.

  That was the thing about penises. They could appear out of nowhere in a heartbeat. Erin put down her spoon and stared at Krshia. Then her eyes swiveled to Selys.

  “Sex? Um. You want to talk about sex?”

  The female Drake followed her eyes as she chewed her fish.

  “Not just sex. Guys. Males. I was just curious and I mentioned it to Krshia, and she said—”

  “You have not had sex. You should. Selys agrees.”

  Krshia nodded while Selys shook her head, waving her hands as Erin stared at her.

  “I didn’t say Erin should have sex. I just thought it was,
um, something to talk about. That’s all.”

  “Oh.”

  Erin sat back in her chair, staring hard. Sex was sex. She knew all about the birds and the bees, although they certainly didn’t look anything like birds or bees up close. She could handle a discussion about private parts, and she certainly wasn’t squeamish but—

  She looked around. She was in a nearly full room full of, not to put a fine point on it, males. Some females, but lots of males now that she looked. And she and her two friends were sitting at a central table talking fairly loudly.

  “Um. Should we talk about it here? I mean, sex is…is…”

  Krshia and Selys stared at her blankly. Erin turned red. Selys laughed.

  “Erin! We just want to talk about relationships. We’re not going to talk about, you know, how it is.”

  “Unless you wish to.”

  Selsys and Erin stared at Krshia. Selys cleared her throat nervously and looked at Erin.

  “We don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I was just curious about whether you were you know…interested. I thought you might be lonely, and Krshia—”

  “Thought I didn’t have enough sex. Right.”

  Erin stared down at her food. Perhaps if she looked at that she wouldn’t have to meet the two stares directed her way.

  “Well I—hadn’t given it much thought, really? I’ve been busy with the inn and all. And um, I hadn’t really thought about a relationship. With someone else, I mean.”

  Krshia frowned.

  “But you are young. Now is the best time to be mating with others. What holds you back?”

  “Nothing! I just—it’s not like people my age go around having sex all the time. Right?”

  Erin looked at Selys. The Drake avoided her gaze.

  “Well, I wouldn’t say all the time, but once in a while is nice, Erin. And it’s not like you have to have someone special. You could just ah, have a special night once in a while.”

  Erin took a moment to figure that one out.

  “You mean a one night stand?”

  “If you wish to stand it would be a long night. But pleasurable, perhaps? I may try that.”

  Selys choked on her drink. Erin thumped her on the back while she tried to stop blushing.

  “Look, I’m no expert. It’d be nice, sure, but it’s just not something I’m looking into.”

  “But why?”

  Selys coughed and looked at Erin.

  “It’s not like there are many humans around. I mean, you could meet up with one of those adventurers or merchants that come by, but there are options, you know? It’s a big city.”

  “Options? What do you…oh.”

  Krshia regarded Erin intently as the human girl’s eyes followed a passing Gnoll. Erin stared wide-eyed at the tall, six-foot tall furred hyena and tried to think of something as a response.

  “I um, I—”

  Krshia sniffed at Erin and frowned.

  “Perhaps you are afraid of Gnolls and Drakes? You do not like scales or fur?”

  “What? No—I don’t mind that. I just—I’ve never—”

  The Gnoll brightened.

  “Oh? So you would not mind mating with one of my kind? It is good.”

  “Well mind is—look Krshia, I really haven’t thought about this. Mating, I mean, having sex is something that I don’t know if I’m ready for. Here I mean. I uh, where would I start…?”

  “Taking clothes off is a good first step. It works for me.”

  Erin turned and glared at Selys. The Drake laughed as Krshia nodded to herself.

  “Perhaps it is fear, then? The first time having sex with another not of your kind is odd. I remember my first Drake. It was odd, but exciting.”

  Erin looked at Selys. The Drake was staring at Krshia.

  “Selys. Have you…?”

  Selys jumped. She looked around wide-eyed, not happy at being in the hot seat.

  “What, me? No! I mean, I’ve just stuck with—there’s a lot of fur on Gnolls. Not that that’s a bad thing, but I thought Erin would like to meet one of my friends.”

  Krshia frowned.

  “Drakes? No. If she is to break her wait, a Gnoll is best.”

  “I’m not sure that’s true—”

  “I have compared the two. I prefer my kind.”

  “But that’s you. I think Erin should have a fair choice, that’s all.”

  “Mm. But she should know what it is she chooses. There are differences, yes? It would be good to teach her.”

  “True…”

  Erin stared at Selys and Krshia as the two talked and wondered if she could run away. Probably not. Krshia could track her down and she’d just continue the conversation when they next met. Unless Erin never came back to Liscor. That was an option.

  Was it hot in the tavern? Erin looked around. She was sure it hadn’t been this warm when she walked in.

  She caught sight of a Gnoll sitting just across from their table. He was a young…Gnoll, and male. He’d probably come here for a quiet meal, but now he was front-row to a conversation that he clearly wanted to hear and not hear at the same time.

  “Erin.”

  Erin jumped and looked at Krshia. The Gnoll was smiling at her.

  “We think you should learn of our kind, so you may find a partner to sleep with. It would be good to learn of in any case, and you will then have many opportunities, to mate, yes?”

  “Yes?”

  She nearly said ‘no, please don’t tell me anything.’ But although part of Erin was horrified this conversation was taking place in public, another part of her was curious. Curious—not committed or anything. But since they were talking about that kind of thing…

  “So there’s a big difference between Drakes and Gnolls?”

  “And humans. We may walk on two feet, but we do some things very differently.”

  Selys cleared her throat.

  “Or so I’m told. I haven’t seen much.”

  “I have.”

  Krshia nodded.

  “Many things are different. Pleasurably so, but it is good to be warned. If you would mate, you should be ready. I can describe them for you, if you wish.”

  Erin still had yet to touch her meal, but she picked up her drink and took a hefty swallow. It was one of the mildly alcoholic beverages on offer and right now she was wishing there was more alcohol in it.

  “Describe? What?”

  “Male parts of course.”

  “Oh. Um, right. Well—okay. Actually, I have a question about that. Do you, um, what do you call them? Male parts, I mean.”

  Selys and Krshia exchanged a look and smiled.

  “What is it that humans call their male parts?”

  Erin told them. Selys frowned.

  “Penis? Vagina? That sounds so…so…ew. It doesn’t sound good. Put the penis in the vagina? Is that what you humans say to each other when you’re doing it?”

  “Well, we don’t say that. We have other…words.”

  “Mm. I think I understand. Males make many names for their pride, is it not so? I have heard them call it their sword, or their spear. Although it is a weak spear if it is just made of flesh.”

  She laughed loudly, and Erin was aware that the other guests in the room were listening to their conversation. Selys didn’t appear to notice.

  “Really? I’ve heard—um, well, most Drakes call it the ‘second tail’.”

  Selys blushed fiercely as Erin tried not to laugh. The Drakes in the room studiously avoided looking anywhere at the three females. Krshia didn’t even bother containing her laughter.

  “It is a good way to say it! I have heard my kind call it their small fang. Very small, in some cases.”

  Erin tried not to, but she had to laugh as well. Krshia smiled.

  “They make much of their male parts, do they not? But Selys, now that we speak of small things I had a question for you.”

  “For me?”

  The Gnoll nodded as she bit into her bloody meal and chewed.

/>   “I have heard it said that your people have not one, but two lower tails among your kind. It is said often among, but although I have checked, I have never seen two, only the one.”

  “Two…?”

  Erin stared at Selys over her drink. She tried to imagine it and got very odd images in her head.

  “That’s a common misconception. Drakes don’t have two. That’s lizard people.”

  Selys scowled around her mug. She flicked her tail on the wooden floor angrily.

  “We’re nothing like those freaks. We have one. I mean, I don’t have one but guys have one. Anyways, what would you do with two?”

  “I can think of a use.”

  Selys looked at Krshia blankly while Erin turned beet red. The Gnoll snorted at them.

  “Younglings. Never mind. If you do not know yet, you will find out. Although maybe you have tried—?”

  “Um, so how is it?”

  Erin changed the subject frantically. She looked at Krshia and SEyls.

  “You said you’ve um, been with humans and Drakes and Gnolls. Anything uh, stand out?”

  Selys snorted into her food and Krshia laughed again.

  “Much stood out, but not so much with humans. It was disappointing, the one time I tried.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes. I had heard humans were not so different than Gnolls or Drakes, but there is a difference down there.”

  Krshia made a gesture that would have been immediately censored on television. Erin was fascinated, though.

  “Really?”

  “Yes. Humans are regrettably small.”

  “Small?”

  This was bad. Erin had somehow gotten sucked into the conversation. She hadn’t meant to, but her sense of embarrassment and shame had taken a hike for a while and she was now horribly, definitely interested in the topic at hand.

  “Um, how small are we talking here?”

  “This big?”

  Krshia spread apart two fingers. Erin frowned.

  “No—they’re not that small.”