There is none to see.
We are ready.
39
Widow’s Nest
The sun rises over the snow-covered horizon in the early morning hours, and we walk. It toggles at midday behind thick purple clouds, and we walk. And even as it arches toward the earth, our muscles tight with fatigue and worry, we push onward.
I keep pace beside Kraven, and every so often, I find it in myself to answer his questions. He’s trying to keep my spirit up¸ though there’s no spirit to speak of. I may harbor my soul within this dead body, but it’s for naught. I don’t need the blasted thing. I can hate this world and everything in it with my mind alone.
What I really keep thinking about, as Kraven speaks to deaf ears and Oswald mutters about his old man knees and Paine ogles Annabelle’s ass, is how maybe Charlie being taken was predetermined. Or at the very least, that she suspected it would happen. Why else would she appoint Annabelle president of Hands Helping Hands? Did Charlie know? Or is it worse than that? Was it always Annabelle that was supposed to lead the charity while Charlie was to do something else—like become a martyr so those who loved her would be driven to action?
I shake my head at the thought and fight the nausea clenching my throat. Thinking back, I try and remember what Valery said about Charlie’s charity in my Las Vegas hotel room.
Her organization will continue to grow and flourish, and in time, it will change the face of humankind. It will remind people how to love another. It will show them how to care again.
She didn’t say Charlie would be the one running things. All Valery said was that the charity that would grow, not who would be behind it. Suddenly I have a new picture of the future, one where Annabelle is poised at podiums and giving radio interviews; one where Annabelle organizes nationwide food drives and suicide outreach programs in her late best friend’s name. People will be helped, and they will help others in return, just the way Charlie envisioned.
“Dante.” Kraven’s voice snaps me back to the present. “You must stay out of your head. It’s a dangerous place to be right now.”
For the first time on our foot journey, I agree with him. We have to be on the lookout for sirens and collectors who haven’t shown their faces, but could at any time. All my mind offers is nightmares and promises of death, and right now I need to become a body, ready for combat and nothing more.
When we reach Widow’s Nest, I know it immediately. We’ve trekked through the forest that surrounds the Hive for hours, snow crunching beneath our boots and coldness nipping at our skin. But now we stand before a glove of damp earth that’s cocooned by twisted branches and thickets. Together the mass creates a cavernous tunnel, and when Kraven waves us into the darkness, we follow him in.
The space is maybe twenty-five feet wide and about the same distance deep. There’s enough room for us all to fit inside, but not so much that we can spread out. When I stand I’m able to do so without hunching, but when I raise my arms above my head they’re met with course moss-covered twigs.
Outside Widow’s Nest, swallows call to one another and somewhere in the distance a barn owl hoots. As we walked through the day, the forest floor was still, but now as the sun prepares to slumber, the forest comes alive. Soft rustling sounds greet my ears, perhaps a red fox scrounging for dinner, and overhead a light breeze sweeps through the trees, causing barren limbs to groan against one other. It’s growing colder, so we huddle together, thankful for the warmth our bodies bring. The humans do their best to make a meal with what food they carried. Anything would be better than the dried sausage and raw potatoes we ate as we traveled.
As Kraven and Paine work to build a fire, I wonder about the footprints we left behind, but soon the snow begins to fall once more, and this dark snowy day in January proves the perfect day to travel incognito.
When they finish working and a small blaze burns inside the den, Kraven whispers something to Paine and he leaves us.
“Where’s he going?” I ask as I breathe in the smell of smoke.
“To set up tents a mile from here,” Kraven responds. “He’ll light a fire there, too.”
“In case they’re looking for us?”
Kraven meets my gaze. “They are looking for us. But I think leaving so soon after the confrontation bought us some time. They won’t have expected it.”
I wonder why they wouldn’t. It seems that after they took Charlie that that’s the first thing we’d do. Or maybe it’s just that it’s the first thing I would do. Maybe Kraven is more calculative. Maybe he left early because of me. But we were planning to leave the next morning, so I’m not sure what difference it makes.
“We’ll sleep in shifts tonight,” he tells me. “You’ll sleep first, and I’ll wake you when it’s your turn to keep watch.”
“Who else will keep watch?” I ask.
He glances away. “Just you and me. The others will sleep the night through.”
I lie down as best I can and listen as Annabelle and Blue whisper to each other. Max huddles in a ball near the entrance, staring at the earth beneath him. He seems lost. If there’s danger in losing yourself in your head, it’s a risk he’s welcomed. The Quiet Ones, who are not so quiet anymore, sit cross-legged near Max, talking closely to each other with absolutely zero hand gestures.
Lincoln sits near the girl with peach-colored hair who I’ve learned is named Polly. His eyes say he’s terrified she’ll spontaneously eat his soul, but he doesn’t move away when she leans her head on his shoulder. His pierced lips inch upward into a cautious smile. He gently pulls a long black bag off his shoulder and lays it on the ground, careful not to disturb Polly. The jackrabbits crowd Lincoln and the girl, and the humans do their best to find a spot to rest.
Oswald is folding a length of fabric in his hands. It’s a scarf that Aspen used to wear around the Hive.
“Why do you have that?” I snap at him more harshly than I intended. “Why are you always taking things that don’t belong to you?”
Oswald’s cheeks redden and he stuffs the scarf into his jacket pocket. It’s the first time I’ve seen the man in anything but a robe. “When I see something I like, I take it. I’m not hurting anyone.”
“Typically you’re supposed to wait until someone offers something before you take it.”
“Well.” Oswald crosses his legs and fumbles with the zipper on his jacket. “Maybe I haven’t been offered very much.”
I don’t know what he’s talking about, but my guess is this eccentric old man was severely ignored when he wasn’t an old man at all. It’s amazing how screwed up parents can make us; Aspen and her fingerless gloves and hard outer shell, me and my anger, Oswald and his petty theft.
I spot the woman with the ever-present shawl. Her name is Laura, and she smiles warmly.
I turn away.
“I won’t be able to sleep,” I tell Kraven.
He stretches his long legs out in front of him. “Try.”
I roll my eyes and lie down, hands shoved beneath my head. Though I don’t believe it possible, I find myself crashing into sleep within minutes.
And then I’m standing before my father.
“Dante!” My dad has always seemed larger than life even though he’s a quiet man. He pulls me into an embrace, and I realize we’re sitting on my bed in our old brownstone. “I knew you’d come.”
This time, I don’t question the dream I’m experiencing, I just clutch my dad close and bury my head into his chest. “Dad.”
“You’ve done so well,” he says. “Things have been hard for you, and you’ve done so well.”
I pull back and inspect my room. Everything is as it was. My made-in-Tuscany bed, my framed chalk drawing signed by the artist, and a row of polished basketball trophies I won before I stopped caring about such things. There’s a wicker basket in the corner overflowing with laundry that the maid will handle, and if I remember correctly, a stash of purple condoms stuffed in a sock somewhere in the closet (ribbed for maximum pleasure).
/> The distinct stale smell of cigarettes hangs in the air, no doubt emanating from my laundry. My parents had to smell it every time they walked in my room. Why didn’t they ever say anything? Why didn’t they care?
“We did care,” Dad says, reading my mind. “We just forgot what was important.”
“That sounds like not caring.”
My dad takes my chin in his hand. It makes me feel like a child. It makes me feel like his son again. “Sometimes it takes losing the one you love before you truly see them.”
“Do you see me now?” My throat tightens.
“I see you, D. I wish I’d seen you the whole time.” He touches a closed fist to my knee. “Your mother, she wishes she would have seen you, too.”
I turn my face away so he won’t spot the emotion welling up inside me. “Are you still watching after her?”
“Every moment. He says if any of them get close to her, He’ll intervene.”
“How?” I ask.
Dad shrugs. “He’s all powerful, right?”
I don’t respond.
“You’re changing, Dante,” my dad says. “Embrace it. Don’t be afraid.”
I turn to him again and stumble backward in shock. His face is pulled tight against his bones. He looks like a monster.
“Don’t be afraid,” he repeats, his lips pulled away from his teeth.
40
Broken
It’s early morning when Kraven wakes me and announces that it’s my turn to keep watch. I don’t feel as though I’ve slept enough, but at the same time, I have no desire to return to the place I was. I don’t want to listen as Aspen tells me she’s dead, and I don’t want to pretend that my father’s words are real—that he regrets time lost with me.
Kraven falls asleep as quickly as I did, as weird as it is I watch him sleep for a while. It seems like too human of a thing for him to do. I wonder if he’s dreaming of war, or if he’s dancing with Annabelle in the corner of his mind.
My gaze flicks to Annabelle and I stifle a gasp when I realize her eyes are wide open.
“Is he asleep?” she whispers.
I pull on my earlobe. “Yeah, he’s out.”
She sits up and tears leak down her cheeks as if they’d never stopped since Charlie was taken. “Annabelle.”
“Don’t try and comfort me,” she says from across the short crackling fire. “I know you’re hurting as bad as I am.”
I sigh as the pain I’d forgotten while sleeping rushes back. “It’s like this big thing has happened, and she’s the one I want to tell it, too. But the big thing…is that she’s gone. So I just feel—”
“Lost?” Annabelle offers.
I shrug.
Annabelle covers her mouth and says through her fingers. “Sometimes it’s like I can’t breathe. I think to myself, ‘What are my parents thinking? Are the police looking for me?’ And sometimes I just wonder what I left in my locker? Like, maybe it was important and it’ll be gone when I get back.” Her quiet voice quiets further. “If I get back.”
“Stop. You’ll get back. The collectors and sirens have no interest in taking out humans because you guys aren’t a threat. No offense. They’ll target the liberators and Oswald. Maybe the jackrabbits, but probably not even that. You guys are coming mostly because Kraven realized he couldn’t leave you behind, and with the tunnel flooded, it’d be next to impossible to get you anywhere else safely.”
I feel like my words should comfort her, but Annabelle cries harder. A few of the humans shift in their sleep, and Annabelle sees them do so.
“I need to go to the bathroom,” she says.
“I’ll go with you.” I get up.
She straightens her back. It does nothing to offset the hurt in her face. “You have to stay here. I’ll be fine.”
“You can’t go alone, Anna.”
“I’ll go with her,” Paine says.
I startle at the sound of his voice. “Okay, is anyone else awake?” When no one responds, I motion for Paine to follow Annabelle and then point to my nonexistent watch, referencing that they should return quickly.
“I would have been fine alone,” Annabelle says, but it isn’t very convincing, and in truth she seems comforted to have Paine by her side. Before they leave, Paine grabs one of the heavy jackets Max carried and wraps it around her frame. He does the same for himself and they head out into the snowy night.
I second guess my decision to let them go the moment they are gone. But what was I supposed to do? The girl had to pee. I wait for five minutes, which feels like thirty, and start to scratch the inside of my arm.
Where the hell are they?
If this is how I am now, I can’t imagine how I’ll be tomorrow when we reach the battlefield. After several more minutes, I decide I have to go after them. I consider waking Kraven, but don’t want him to think I can’t handle something as simple as keeping watch over sleeping bodies.
Pulling a blanket around my shoulders, I head into the falling snow. The flakes touch down on my head and melt into my hair, tingling my scalp. I tug the blanket over my head and think how I must look pretty menacing right now. All I need is a juice box and a plastic sword to play with.
I let the blanket fall down around my shoulders as if this makes me more of a man, and call out for Annabelle. When she doesn’t answer, I make a wider loop around Widow’s Nest and keep my eyes peeled. As my nerves build, I decide to pull on my shadow.
A noise reaches me.
It’s the sound of hushed voices and soft moaning. My stomach turns imagining what I’m about to see. I move closer, hoping on my good looks that I’m not about to see what I think I’m going to see, which is Annabelle getting it on with dude #2.
I duck behind an overgrown tree as the sounds grow louder. I’m just going to ensure they’re okay, then I’ll scold them like a ninety-year-old grandpa and drag them both back to camp by the ear. The thought makes me smile for the first time since Charlie disappeared.
And just as quickly as it touches my lips, it vanishes.
A sickening ache tugs at my chest. She’s gone.
I peek out from the tree so I can catch them in the act. Because embarrassing them is the least I can do after they dragged me out into the cold. Besides, I’ve seen all this PG-13 crap a million times before. No way Annabelle has gone past second base.
When I spot them, I freeze.
Paine has his hand over Annabelle’s mouth and his body pressed against hers. She’s writhing against him and doing her best to scream for help. She’s no match for him though. He whispers fiercely into her ear as she tries to bring her knee between his legs. He blocks her easily enough.
“Let her go!” I yell, before I can think to sneak up on him. Only fifteen feet separate us, and I rush forward, closing the distance as my shadow slips away. Right before I reach Paine, he tears his wings open and tosses me like a discarded toy across the forest. I land on my right side and wince from the impact. The liberator is on me in an instant. He has something in his hands.
A stone!
I bring up my arms to shield myself, but it’s no use. Paine brings the stone down on my head and the world spins. I fall back, dizzy and overwhelmed by pain and confused as to why this is happening. Annabelle takes her opportunity to scream, and Paine lunges on her. His hand is back on her mouth. He glances over his shoulder, and when he’s satisfied no one is coming and that I’m not getting up, he speaks quickly to her. I overhear bits and pieces as I try and stand. My legs buckle beneath me each time, and I curse that my cuff is taking so long to heal my injury.
“I have favor in hell after the work I’ve done,” Paine says. “We can be together…can be with your friend.”
Annabelle shakes her head as Paine lays a kiss along her neck.
Paine mutters against her neck. “So beautiful…we have to go now.” I notice that the stone he hit me with is still in his right hand. His left covers Annabelle’s mouth. He lifts his right hand up and I see that the stone is wet with my blood. H
e’s going to hit Annabelle with it. I have no doubt he means to knock her unconscious, not to kill her. But I can’t lose another person. And I can’t stand by as another person I trusted does the taking.
I climb to my feet and though I wobble and the world quivers, I keep upright. I take a slow step toward them. Then another. Annabelle’s eyes land on me. They widen.
Paine follows her gaze, and his head whips in my direction. He gasps and there’s utter shock stretched across his face.
Kraven touches down into view, his white wings spread in flight.
He snaps Paine’s neck.
One moment Paine is breathing.
The next he isn’t.
Paine’s body slumps to the ground, and in one swift movement, Kraven takes the stone from Paine’s limp hand and severs the dargon around his ankle. The head liberator retracts his wings inside of himself and breathes hard through his nose over Paine’s body. He stares blankly at the corpse, his lips pressed in a tight line, jaw clenched.
Then he turns to Annabelle. Her black hair is mussed, and Kraven smoothes it down as if that is what matters in this moment. He takes her in his arms and she sobs against his chest. I suddenly feel as I’m intruding.
Kraven turns his head in my direction. I think he’s going to yell at me for leaving Widow’s Nest, for leaving them all unguarded. Instead, he says, “I saw what he was doing to her.”
It’s like he’s explaining why he was so quick to kill Paine, but he certainly doesn’t need to. I understand. Though my mind has yet to accept what happened here. I stare at Paine’s face, his eyes wide with surprise, tongue resting on his lower lip. I expect to experience anger at what he did to Annabelle, to all of us. Or maybe sadness. But there’s no room in my heart for anything other than the loss I feel for Charlie.
I touch a hand to my head and my mind spins. Paine was a traitor. This whole time, he was a traitor. How could I have been so blind? How could he have secured a liberator cuff and deceived Big Guy? It wouldn’t be the first time He was deceived, I suppose.
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