by C. M. King
“It’s not goodbye, it’s so long for a while. I will still be in your life day to day, annoying you.” He winked and another tear escaped as I grabbed him and hugged him hard. We should have been prepared for this. After all, the lifestyle of the job could take us anywhere in the world, but it all felt too much. I guess it might get easier as I went along, but right now, it felt like the hardest thing in the world.
“I have to go before I start bawling too. I’m only just keeping it together myself.”
I held onto him for a few moments longer, not quite ready to let go just yet till I managed to compose myself. I drew back and he kissed me softly on the forehead.
“Go make us proud, Iz.” Elijah’s voice wobbled on the last part, and he walked away without looking back. I think he knew if he did, the situation would be even more emotional and for that I was thankful.
* * *
It was it was my last full day with Joel as I was setting off early to Edinburgh in the morning. He had taken the day off so we could spend every last minute together. We had gone to my mother’s last night for a farewell family meal, Mike and Kara had been there too. It had been nice, just the five of us. Of course, towards the end it had all gone a bit teary, even Mike had filled up a little, something I never thought capable but it was nice to know that he would miss me too. Kara promised to look after him. I was glad he had found such an amazing girlfriend and that his life was finally one I was proud of. My mother had clucked around me like a mother hen, asking questions about everything that had long been sorted. But I knew she needed this, it was her having to finally let go so I allowed her this, but I appreciated Joel’s hand squeezing mine under the table in a ‘hang in there’ action. I loved that he knew me so well.
My day began with Joel gently rousing me from my sleep. I was going to miss these wake up calls. There was no substitute for Joel’s lips, they were heaven against my skin. I sighed in sadness at the prospect that for the next few months I would be without him, waking up alone.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked, looking concerned.
Like he even needed to ask?
“Just sad this is my last day.” I sighed.
“But we’re going to make it a good one.”
I turned to face him, he was smiling, but I could see the sadness in his eyes. If he was trying to put a brave face on about my departure, then I sure as hell could too.
“Today is going to be an amazing day,” I replied, quickly moaning when I felt his fingers begin to stroke me.
“I plan on giving you so many orgasms today that your body is going to need a break from me.” He grinned and I couldn’t help but reciprocate. A day filled with intense, delicious orgasms, I was ready to begin.
* * *
“Oh god, Joel, I can’t take any more.” I panted the words I thought I’d never say, but after bringing me to orgasm twice with his mouth, once with his fingers and twice inside me, I was ready to surrender.
“Lightweight,” he chuckled, pulling me into him so I was resting on his chest.
“I think you’ve made your point, I need to rest. I need this just you and me skin on skin, snuggling together.”
“I think I can do that.”
“But thank you for this morning. You never fail to surprise me just how far you will go.” He always surprised me by taking it to the next level.
“I love to see you come apart in front of me. It’s my favourite part knowing that I do that to you, only me.”
“Joel, it will only ever be you,” I replied breathlessly.
“I know.” He pressed his lips against me, then went to pull away but I cupped his face holding him there a few moments longer. I needed this kiss, to feel his lips against mine. It was almost like I was memorizing every single touch, feeling so that I could remember on those days we were apart.
Eventually my gurgling stomach broke the moment, and Joel sniggered against my lips.
“I think I need to get you some breakfast, growler.”
“Seriously that’s one thing I won’t miss, that flipping nickname,” I ranted. It annoyed me every time.
“You love it really.”
“Trust me, I don’t,” I huffed, shoving back the covers to head for the shower. He quickly chased me and pressed me up against the cold bathroom tiled wall.
“I think we need to have one more go.” He pressed himself into me.
“Joel, how are you even hard, are you a freaking robot?” This was just unbelievable.
“You just have to be naked for me to react, you know that.”
It was true. I barely had to show a little skin and he pounced on me, not that I was complaining, as the orgasms that followed were enough to put a smile on my face.
He leaned over and switched on the shower, keeping his hand there to judge the temperature in between kisses.
“Are you ready to scream some more?” he asked, grinning and I rolled my eyes at his egotistical question, but he soon got my reply minutes later when my voice echoed around the bathroom.
He was good, and boy, did he know it.
* * *
I finished washing the last of the breakfast dishes. After all, Joel had cooked so washing was the least I could do. I could barely move after the fry up, but we had a busy day planned and so needed a hearty breakfast to fuel us for what was ahead.
After the dishes were done, we headed out and picked up Ruby from my mother’s to head for a walk at the park. We had a picnic basket loaded with amazing delicious treats, and of course, plenty to keep Ruby occupied. She was more than happy to see us. She leapt up, almost knocking me over, which seemed to be her specialty. It was a good thing I had great balance from all the training.
So with the sun beating down on us, the three of us headed out to enjoy our last afternoon together. I knew Joel would be here all the time with Ruby as it was her favourite place to be, but it would be minus me and that thought alone made me sad.
Joel unfolded the blanket, spreading it out along the grass, Ruby soon dropped down, taking good of the sun as Joel put up an umbrella to stop us all from catching heat stroke. I quickly emptied out all the food, making sure to give Ruby hers first before she decided to help herself to ours. It was bliss.
We quickly devoured the food, with Joel and Ruby around there was never any waste. I was hoping they would be good company for each other once I had gone. Joel got up a while later to play Frisbee with Ruby. She enjoyed bounding around using all that energy, she became the main attraction amongst a group of kids and was more than pleased to stand there and be petted. She was still a little miss limelight but she had learned that from Elijah. Sometimes I looked at her remembering the little puppy she used to be. So much had happened in this last year. It was unbelievable how fast time had gone and now things were changing, our usual day to day routine would be no more. I hoped she wouldn’t pine too much and that Joel would manage to placate her while I was away. We spoke about FaceTiming with her, but then I worried that she wouldn’t understand and it would distress her even more.
She wandered over a short while later, giving me a hello lick on my cheek, and I chuckled. She was such a sweet dog. I had waited so long to have my own pet. She truly was a blessing, well when she wasn’t trying to chew my shoes. She flopped down and gave me the ‘pet me’ eyes. I tickled her ears, and she soon rolled over with her legs in the air insisting I tickle her stomach too. She was too adorable and would have me tickling her all day long if she could.
Joel dropped down beside me, placing a kiss against my skin. I shivered slightly, his lips still had that effect on me. Ruby shuffled over so Joel could pet her too. He chuckled at the look of delight she gave him, and he kissed her on the head. I quickly took a picture of them both, setting it as my screensaver so I always had something to remind me. Ruby soon fell asleep, leaving Joel and I to curl up together.
“Have you had a nice day?” he asked.
“The best.”
“I love this place, it’s our place.
” He sighed.
“I know, when the sun is out, it is the best place to be.” It truly was.
“Do you fancy going out tonight? We could go for a meal,” Joel suggested.
“No, I just want to spend the night like this curled up tight against you, just us, no one interrupting us. This is my perfect night.”
“I’m not arguing. We could get a Chinese.”
“Now you are talking, and order extra prawn crackers. I’m going to veg out, after tonight I’ll be on a strict diet so this is like my final supper.”
“We are definitely going all out then.” He kissed my hair, and I sighed into his chest. Just Joel, Ruby and more Chinese food than what my body could handle.
Chapter Seventeen
“Now make sure you stay in touch and eat well. Performing everyday will be exhausting for your body so get plenty of vitamin C inside of you to fend off all those bugs going around.”
“Yes, Mum.” I rolled my eyes at her non-stop of list of demands, but I knew she meant well.
“I mean it, Izzy, I need to know you’ll look after yourself. I know you’ve long flown the nest moving in with Joel, but I still worry about you daily. Make sure you check in with me at least twice a week, I need to know you’re okay. Promise me you will,” she insisted, giving me the look.
“I will, I will,” I reassured her.
“Good, because a mother needs to know her child is happy. I know you’re going to be amazing. We’ll be coming to see you soon. We’ll let you know when.”
“Oh, I’m sure Mike will love that,” I scoffed.
Mike pulled a face rolling his eyes. “Ecstatic,” he mumbled sarcastically, pulling me into a hug. “But seriously, sis, I’m so proud, you’re living your dream. Break a leg for me and we’ll see you soon, probably front row if Kara and Mum have their way.”
I laughed and then immediately felt nervous at the thought of all eyes being on me, but it was something I’d get used to. They soon left leaving only Joel and I to have some privacy while we said our final goodbye.
“So your train should be getting in soon. This is it,” Joel said, sighing.
“I don’t want to leave you,” I whispered.
“I don’t want you to go either, but you need this. Once you’re there, surrounded by all the other actors, you’ll feel at home. They’ll welcome you into the group and become your family.”
“But you’re my family.” I pouted.
“I know but they will be your substitute family and take care of you while you’re gone.” He smiled at me reassuringly, but I still felt sick at the thought of leaving everyone behind.
“Will you ring me every day?” I asked, beginning to panic.
“Err of course, and it will be more than once.”
“Good.” I felt more appeased by his words. I would talk to him all day long if I could, but in between practicing and the shows and Joel’s job there would limit how much time we’d get to chat but I’d savour every second of it.
“Ring me when you get checked into the hotel. I want to know you arrived there safely.”
“Joel, I’ll be fine on the train.” He was always worrying.
“Ring me.”
“Fine.” I sighed against his lips. I wanted to launch into the kisses of all kisses, but here in a crowded Euston station that wasn’t a possibility. When they tannoyed my train was about to arrive, I almost burst into tears.
“Hey, you’ll be fine.”
“I know, I’ll just miss you.” I felt a tear trickle down my cheek, which Joel quickly swiped away.
“But this is your dream, you have to do this. I will be here waiting for you.”
“I’m just being daft, now kiss me because I have go.”
“Better make it a good one.” He winked.
I grinned as he pulled me in, he didn’t hold back. This time I wasn’t bothered about drawing the attention of anyone else, as this was our final moment. When they tannoyed again we broke apart and both laughed, until I realized I was leaving.
“Ring me, Iz, when you get in,” Joel urged me again.
“I will.”
He gave me a quick peck on the lips and stood back. I looked at him one more time before I grabbed my case and headed towards the train, handing over my ticket to be checked. I glanced back quickly and waved. Turning, I swiped away a tear and boarded the train. I didn’t look back again. I didn’t have the strength to. I knew I’d break down. So I placed my suitcase down in the luggage area, heading for my seat. I sat down instantly hearing my text alert go off. I knew who it would be and a part of me was hesitant to look. I took and deep breath and clicked on the message.
I love you. You will be amazing, but I miss you already. When you are finished with the tour, I want you to come home and marry me and make me the happiest man alive x
The tears quickly flowed, it was a good job I was wearing waterproof mascara or else I’d be sporting panda eyes right now.
I want nothing more to marry you. Once I return we’ll make this wedding happen. I want that ring on my finger to seal the fact I will be yours forever x
I clicked my phone off and sat back in the seat. Closing my eyes, I let the tears fall knowing the pain I was feeling now was for the greater good. I was on my way to a new place, a new career and a mixture of nerves and excitement bubbled within me at the prospect of what just was ahead.
* * *
Unlocking the door to the place that would be my home for the next week, it was basic but clean. After all I would barely be here. Rehearsals would take up much of my day and then the performance so I would be at the theatre most of the time. This was just a place to rest my head after a long tiring day.
I unzipped my suitcase and hung up a few of the essentials before sliding the case to the corner of the room. I checked my phone to find another text from Joel. He would be patiently waiting to hear that I had arrived safely. I thought about ringing, but I didn’t trust myself not to cry so I decided to go with a simple text to placate him and stop him from completely worrying. I instantly received one back, I could feel his relief radiate from the screen. I knew it was hard for him to let me go. He had been so selfless in not showing me his true feelings, always being so supportive, even though the distance between us would be one that would be unbearably difficult as time went on.
I was soon knocked out of my thoughts by a sharp rap on the door, the noise alone made me jump. I hesitantly opened the door to find a tall, dark haired guy smiling back at me. He was slightly unnerving the way he grinned, at first I thought he was drunk. After all he didn’t appear to be lost, the way he leaned in against the doorway, his eyes giving me the once over before slowly returning to my face.
“You must be Izzy,” he asked smiling.
“Yeah, that’s me and you are?”
“I’m Josh. I was asked to come and be the welcome party. They said your train was getting in around now, you must be ready to leave this room.”
“Yeah, the walls are beginning to close in on me,” I joked, before immediately feeling ungrateful. “Not that I’m complaining,” I quickly backtracked. Oh god, my first impression was not going well, I could have kicked myself for my honesty.
“I know what you mean, but trust me, months in you’ll barely notice. You’ll just look at this room as a place to lay your head. We have a lot of social activities to keep ourselves amused when we’re not practicing or performing. I have a feeling you’ll fit right in. I like a person who’s direct, none of that bullshit malarkey.”
“I can certainly do that.” I laughed and he quickly followed suit.
“Come and let me introduce you to all the crew.”
I couldn’t hide my look of hesitation. I wasn’t great around new people, but I had to make an effort. These were people I’d be working alongside for the next few months. So I had to put my awkward side away and try to be more of a social butterfly that would make even Elijah proud.
“Hey, no one will bite, well maybe I might.” He wink
ed and I smiled, grateful for the jovial mood. I grabbed my phone and my bag as we made our way to the theatre.
Chapter Eighteen
“Hey guys, this is Izzy.”
I smiled awkwardly as all eyes now appeared to focus on me. Yeah, not intimidating in the slightest.
“Hey Iz, I’m Corinne, nice to meet our replacement for Diane. She’s going to be a big miss but that’s the way it is around here. We’re a nice crowd. You’ll settle in and get used to the busy schedule.”
I smiled over at Corinne, she seemed nice. She was petite with a choppy blonde bob and striking features “Thanks, it’s a little overwhelming, but I should get the flow of it all.” Well, I hoped so anyway.
“You will. Do you fancy coming for a coffee? We’re just about to head over to Starbucks, a girl needs her caffeine to get through the day.”
“Oh you read my mind, I’m definitely in.” Starbucks was my one guilty pleasure.
“Micha, are you ready?”
“Yeah, just give me two seconds,” The redhead said, barely even looking up, her eyes remained transfixed on her phone screen as her fingers worked the keys. I could tell from the look on her face she was obviously texting someone that meant something to her.
“Oh don’t mind Micha, she has to be practically surgically removed from her phone. She’s always texting her boyfriend Luke.” She winked as Micha gave her the middle finger never once losing the rhythm as she continued to message.
“I’m coming too,” Josh added, even though by the looks of it he had not been invited.
“Just invite yourself along,” Corinne muttered loud enough so Josh would hear. He grinned and I could tell from his laid back attitude that he clearly wasn’t one to take offence at anything they said. Though I got the impression that most of it was in jest, they all appeared to have adopted a dry sense of humour, and I knew there and then I would fit it right away.