by Kenya Wright
“Okay. Let’s keep it down for the driver.” I laughed until my throat burned.
“She knows your name. She’s doing that on purpose.” Holly glared back at Emma. “Say Ivory on more time and it’s going to be you and me!”
Emma held her hands in the air. “I said her name right.”
“You didn’t!”
“I did.” Emma turned to me. “Didn’t I, Ivory?”
“Motherfucker!” Holly tried to jump her little ass over the seat.
“Whoa!” Veronica grabbed and pulled her back.
I scooted over so I was between them.
Anna chuckled. “This is the best night ever.”
“But what did I do?” Emma whined. “I said it right. Didn’t I, Ivo—”
“Girl.” I held up my hand. “Let’s leave it alone.”
Park offered Emma a thermos. “Here. Have some of this.”
“What is it?” Emma asked.
“Tequila.”
Surprisingly, she grabbed the thermos and took a big gulp.
We made it to the restaurant. At least the driver was chuckling as he opened the door and let us out. I handed him a hundred-dollar bill. He said he would be back to pick us up.
Once he drove off, we all turned to the restaurant and drank it in. The place was called Ice.
This town may not be creative with their naming, but they sure know what to do with snow.
The restaurant truly represented its name. Ice bricks formed a huge building. It was a massive igloo. The snowy ambiance literally reached from the floor to the ceiling. Stunning ice sculptures filled every corner. But most of all, it was freezing.
Holy Mother Mary, it’s cold!
This was why I made sure we had matching jackets, gloves, and hats. When I made reservations, the hostess told me that the temperature went below 0 °C. Therefore, dinner had to be booked in advance so that the food could be served quickly.
We headed inside.
Lord, even the tables are made out of ice.
Unfortunately for us, the place had several couples and groups eating. I hoped we wouldn’t be too rambunctious for them. Thankfully, there were no kids or I would have had to snatch off Holly’s dildo crown.
We marched in there, clapping and snapping our fingers to our own music. “We getting married! He getting married! She getting married!”
Even Emma sang along, which told me the Park’s thermos of tequila had helped.
Veronica bent over and twerked in the aisle. “They getting married!”
“Okay! Okay!” Stumbling back, I hushed us. “We have to act like classy bitches in here.”
Holly whispered to me, “But we’re not classy bitches.”
“We are.” I turned back to the host as he hurried to us. “Hello.” I cleared my throat. “Smith party.”
Veronica snapped her fingers. “Party of classy bitches right here.”
Park laughed on my right. “Working for you is so awesome.”
I unintentionally burped and waved it away. “And see, Park, Saint wants you to cut your trip.”
“Oh my God.” Holly widened her eyes as she stumbled next to me. “This is your assistant Park?”
“Yeah.”
“You brought your assistant?” Holly laughed. “You think Saint and I are going to let you get any work done this week?”
“I was hoping so—”
“Never!” Holly did an evil laugh. “We’re going to the Santa Clause village every day.”
“The hell we are.”
“Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!”
“All right.” I shushed her. “Fine. I get it. A bunch of hoes will be there.”
Holly jabbed her finger at my chest. “Your butt is ours this week!”
“Yes, Holly.” I giggled. “I’ve got it.”
Somehow we made it to the table without getting kicked out for being loud and boisterous. I could feel the alcohol kicking in, but I hoped food would keep it down.
Too bad, dinner started with drinks in glasses made of ice. Even with the gloves on, my glass kept slipping in my hands. Therefore, I chugged it fast.
Man. . .I’m about to be tore up.
“This place,” Holly slurred, “Is the very epitome of who I am.”
I smirked. “You’re a cold bitch?”
“No.” She widened her eyes. “I’m white as hell. This winter I’ve been unable to tan.”
“No, you’re not.”
“I’m pale as fuck, Ivy. Don’t lie to me.”
“I’m not lying.” I held my hand to my heart. “I swear.”
“You always were a bad liar. That’s okay because I’m like a winter goddess.” She raised her ice glass in the air. Some of the red liquid spilled from it. “To winter goddesses, everyone!”
We all raised our glasses with her. “To winter goddesses!”
The waiter came over to our rowdy table. I apologized a few times through giggling. Every time he tried to take our drink order, he gazed at Holly’s dildo crown as if unsure of what it could be.
Holly pointed at her crown and slurred. “It’s a bunch of dildos!”
I took her hand and whispered, “He’s got it, Holly. Let’s keep our voices down.”
Holly winked at the waiter. “You like it! Don’t you?”
“Okay.” I grabbed his attention. “We just need the food I ordered for everyone weeks ago and lots of water. This table is cut off from alcohol.”
“What?! Don’t cut off the alcohol.” Veronica was bent over the edge of the table twerking again.
I shrieked. “What are you doing?”
“Emma said she didn’t know how to twerk.” Veronica sat back down. “I told her that I would show her.”
I pointed at her. “Stay seated. We’ll show her how to twerk when we leave.”
Veronica pouted and pointed back at me. “I love you, girl!”
“Okay.” I motioned to lower her voice. “I love you too.”
“No, Ivy! I really love you!” She kept pointing. “You take good care of Holly!”
“Okay, we really love each other.”
Emma stood and rocked her crotch in and out.
I held my hands in the air. “Now what are you doing?”
“Twerking.”
Anna and Holly laughed.
“Just sit down, Emma.” I waved my hands in front of me. “No more twerking in here. We’re classy bitches.”
Holly raised her hands in the air. “To classy bitches!”
“Oh, no.” I shook my head. “Shhh.”
Everyone else yelled. “To classy bitches!”
Luckily, the older couple next to us laughed.
The woman leaned our way. “Congratulations. Who’s the bride?”
“Me! The one with dildos!” Holly’s eyes watered. “Thanks so much for saying that too. That means so much to me.”
“Oh, God.” I covered my face.
“I’m just consumed by love tonight.” Holly bawled.
Check, please.
Regardless, the food was delicious and served swiftly. I believed it was to keep all of us from getting frostbite and perhaps to get our drunk asses out of there! The first course was a creamy mushroom soup with buttery bread. The main course was grilled reindeer fillet with a buttery sauce, roasted root vegetables, and a potato cake. While I didn’t know people ate reindeer, I decided it was one of my new favorite meats.
Unfortunately, Holly refused to eat hers. Next, she held her hands in prayer and sang Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
I showed her my knife. “If you don’t be quiet. . .”
She lowered her voice. “I love you.”
“Love me without any more craziness this evening.”
They served dessert on ice plates. It was chocolate fondant with berries. I ordered us coffee and staggered off to the bathroom. That was when I realized I was even drunker than I thought. Somehow, I pissed in that cold-ass bathroom. The walls were made of ice. At least the toilet was porcelain. My butt was freezing
and I was ready to get out of the whole restaurant.
When I returned and sipped my coffee, I realized it was full of tequila. I swallowed and glared at them. “Who spiked the coffee?”
Emma raised her hand. “Tequila makes everything better.”
Holly raised her cup in the air. “To tequila!”
“To tequila!”
Even Park had chimed in.
“No.” I shook my head. “We need to make it to the club and at this rate we are going to need stretchers. No more tequila.”
Three women walked by and sneered at us. One muttered in an odd accent, “There are penises on her head. They must be Americans.”
“What did you say?” Holly yelled at them.
Please, keep walking.
They stopped and started speaking in French.
Holly jumped up from her seat. “Naw, bitch! Because you didn’t say that shit earlier in French so that means you wanted me to hear that.”
Shit. Bruce Lee Holly is here.
I rushed up and got between the women and Holly. “Okay. Just keep on going, ladies. Sorry for any disrespect. We’re just celebrating her wedding.”
Instead of leaving, they remained there. The woman said something in French.
Holly slung a piece of bread at her.
“Holly.” I kept her tiny self-back.
“Filthy Americans.” The woman walked off.
“Fuck you!” Emma yelled at her. “French food sucks!”
The woman flipped us off. Veronica slung a fork at her.
“No. No.” I shook my head and lost hold of Holly.
She raced her little ass over to them and that was the end of the night. The women jumped on Holly, and I found myself in a fight. I made it there, grabbed one of their heads, and dragged her into the ice floor. Veronica took the other. I spotted Park kicking the chick I had on the ground. Emma was on the last one, slapping her. I didn’t know how long the fight lasted. I just know that most of the restaurant rushed out of there.
In the end, the manager called the local police. We were dragged out, handcuffed, and sitting on the edge of the sidewalk, even the French women. There was a language barrier with the cops. None spoke English. I motioned for my phone. They uncuffed my hands and gave it to me.
“I can call someone?” I waved it in front of them.
They nodded.
“Thank you.” I dialed Saint.
He sounded tired. “Are you all in jail yet?”
“Almost.”
He cleared his throat. “What?”
“We’re handcuffed. I don’t think they want to take us in, but we may need someone to vouch for us or something.” I checked the manager near one of the cops, yelling and pointing at us. “The restaurant owner is pretty pissed.”
Saint sighed. “What’s the name of the place?”
“Ice.”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes. Give the phone to the cop.”
“Thank you, Saint.” I handed it to the officer next to me.
The cop spoke in a foreign language. It appeared Saint knew it. The cop’s expression relaxed. He hung up, gave me back the phone, and pointed at the curb.
I looked at Holly.
She was sleeping on Veronica’s lap. Thankfully, she didn’t have a black eye.
“What’s going on?” Veronica asked.
“Saint could communicate with them. He said something and now he’s on the way.”
Veronica shook her head. “I’m just glad we’re not in jail.”
“Me too, but it’s a tourist town. Places like this thrive off visitors. They’re probably used to drunken brawls between stupid Americans.”
Veronica grinned. “I can’t believe that happened.”
“Me either.”
“I don’t even know how that happened. I was just sitting at the table, reading my bible.”
“I know right.”
Veronica shook her head. “The devil is always busy.”
I chuckled as the cops put me back in handcuffs. “At least we have a story to tell Holly and Nikolas’s kids.”
Saint arrived ten minutes later and had a long conversation with the restaurant’s manager. Unfortunately, Saint brought others with him.
“Damn it.” Veronica frowned.
Trevor limped over. “A fight, Veronica?”
“I was reading my bible.”
He glared and helped her up. “It’s a good policy to not get in a drunken brawl while in another country.”
“Well at least in Finland the cops won’t shoot me down before talking.”
Trevor gestured for one of the cops to take the handcuffs off. “You’re in trouble.”
Veronica winked at him. “I hope trouble lasts all night.”
Anna and Emma’s father came along and then I spotted Emma’s husband. Nikolas was there too. With those big arms, Nikolas picked up Holly who was still knocked out.
I looked up at him. “Sorry.”
“At least this time she doesn’t have a black eye.”
“Sorry for that night, too.”
“And the dildo crown.”
I pointed at Veronica walking away. “Sorry. But you’ll have to forgive us.”
“Do I?”
“Marrying her means marrying all of us.”
“Aren’t I a lucky guy.” Sighing, Nikolas carried her away with the dildo crown still on her head.
The cops took the rest of our handcuffs off, even the French women.
Park stretched and yawned next to me. “Some night, boss.”
“Some night indeed.” I ran my fingers through my hair. “So. . .it’s clear that no work will get done. Anytime you want to head back home, let me know.”
Her eyes brightened. “Uh. . .well. . .I was thinking tomorrow evening, maybe.”
“Book the flight. I’ll reimburse you.”
“Thank you.” She reached out to hug me and stopped herself. “Merry Christmas, Ivy.”
“Yeah.” I caught Saint prowling my way. He’d just finished talking to the restaurant manager.
Glaring, he stopped in front of me. “You had one job, Ivy.”
“She was good until Emma spiked the coffee with tequila during dessert.”
“Emma?” He tilted his head to the side. “Of all people you think I will believe that Emma spiked the coffee?”
“It’s the facts.”
Saint looked at Park.
Park nodded. “It really was Emma.”
“Hmmm.” His serious expression broke into humor. “A bar fight in winter wonderland. Only Holly and you.” He gestured to Park. “My father will take you back. I’m still reprimanding Ivy.”
“Cool.” Park yawned again and walked off. “See you later, boss.”
“Don’t forget to book the flight.” I winked at Saint. “See. I’m letting her off.”
“You’re still on my shit list.” He studied me, lifted his hand, and took something out of my hair. “Why are bread crumbs in your hair?”
“Who knows where that came from.”
He laughed.
“Not funny.” I gestured to the manager who was now smiling and waving goodbye. “What did you tell him? He’s in a better mood.”
“He wanted to press charges. The police didn’t want to do the paperwork or have the news report in the morning that they arrested an American tourist. Then I showed up.”
“The manager recognized you?”
Saint nodded. “I promised him that his restaurant, Ice, will now be featured in our next season. How was the dessert?”
“The small piece I had was delicious, but it was chocolate. After all the boozy cocoa, I don’t think I want to even hear the word chocolate again.”
“Too bad. You owe me. If I have to come back to this town again for the show, you’ll be with me, smiling and eating all the damn chocolate that is provided.”
“What?”
He raised his eyebrows.
“Fine. That’s clearly better than jail.”
“Let’s go.” He guided me forward. “Did you get to all your festivities?”
“We missed the strip club. I paid a lot for VIP.”
“Aww. Poor strippers.”
Chapter 7
Christmas Kiss
We made it back to my villa in no time. When I thought Saint would say goodnight and leave, he walked right in.
I eyed him. “And what are you doing?”
He shut the door behind him. “I saved the princess tonight. Surely, I get some sort of reward.”
I smiled. “What do you want?”
“Your heart.”
I frowned. “Really, Saint?”
“Really.” Fast, he closed the distance between us. “I guess it’s stupid to ask for your heart when I already have it.”
I snorted.
“I do have it. You just won’t admit it. That’s what makes this so difficult.”
“Oh. Is that what the problem is?”
“It is.” He leaned forward and brushed his lips against mine.
A soft moan left my mouth.
“Hmmm. I love it when you moan for me.”
That ache returned in strong, intense waves. It rose in my chest, deep and yearning for him. The sensations were like fireworks, sending sparks into the darkness of my soul—my mind. I closed my eyes, trying to control the reaction, but it was all flashing lights behind my lids.
“Any new thoughts since our last conversation?”
I opened my eyes.
Saint moved his hand and grazed my wrist with his finger. Tingling sensations zipped up and down my spine. “Are you going to say the words I want to hear?”
“What words?”
“I love you.”
“I do love you.” I bit my lip.
“Hmmm.”
My heart kicked against my chest. “I want to fuck, Saint.”
He gave me a wicked smile. “I’m not one of your fuckboys.”
I sighed.
“Speaking of your fuckboys.” He leaned his head to the side. “What color are you on now?”
“Does it matter?”
He spoke through clenched teeth. “What color?”
I blinked. “Red, but I canceled him before this trip.”
“Why? Did he hurt you?”
“No. He wanted more.”
“Hmmm.”
“Do you want to fuck or not?”
“I told you I won’t be playing with your pussy unless you’re ready to stop the bullshit.”
“Then you’re in my villa to tease me?”