by Joanne Rock
He could have resisted his own impulse to taste her, but he damn well couldn’t deny her request that made him want to move mountains to make her happy. To please her.
So he lifted up a rusty prayer for restraint as he threaded a hand through her silky hair. He cupped the back of her neck. Drew her toward him. He moved slowly, giving her time to change her mind. She thought it had been a long time for her? He’d bet it had been even longer for him.
And every instant of those achingly lonely months without a woman’s touch turned on him now, sending a roaring heat blazing over his skin. Sensual hunger reared up like a ravenous beast. Ruthlessly, he tamped it all down to brush his lips tenderly over hers. Once. Twice.
He breathed her in. Felt her breath catch. He skimmed a touch down the side of her neck while the whole world fell away around them. He wanted to bring her home and kiss her whole body this way. With the sweet reverence she deserved after the year she’d endured. His beautiful warrior.
Except she wasn’t his. And she never could be.
Breaking the kiss, he closed his eyes for a moment longer, unwilling to look into hers and see all that he could never have with her. He was too broken to share a life with anyone, let alone a woman who had a child on the way. She deserved so much more than the scraps of himself that he just barely held together.
When he felt her shift away from him, he looked up to see her brush her fingers over her lips, a gesture that made him want to haul her right back into his arms again. He steeled himself against the impulse.
“Should we finish up the walk?” he asked, holding out a hand to help her to her feet. “I think I see a fallen pecan tree over there.”
She nodded, already in motion. Perhaps she needed to get her thoughts together as much as he did. Ruby trotted between them, looking up at him with soulful eyes. Vaughn followed more slowly, knowing he’d never forget the feel of Abigail’s lips on his.
* * *
Back in her studio that evening, Abigail lifted her safety goggles and stepped away from her project to stare up at the giant tree sculpture she was making for the children’s ward. She set down her chisel on a workbench, knowing she was getting ahead of herself with some detail carving down low on the tree when she still had big cuts to make on the top half. She planned to graft branches of varying kinds of wood onto the trunk, creating a tree that was larger than life and represented all trees. In her own mind, she knew it was a multicultural tree. An accepting tree with many outstretched arms.
But she let people see in it what they chose.
She had a long way to go to complete the project and tonight she was still rattled after that kiss and the time spent with Vaughn, unsure what it all meant. She was in dire need of an outlet, and her work usually provided the best kind of distraction.
Unfortunately, not today.
She had been lost in the moment when she’d asked for that kiss, affected by the warmth of the man and the beauty of the surroundings. Heartened by his understanding of a night she would always remember with some sadness mixed in with the miracle of conception. Telling Vaughn had been cathartic. She felt a connection to him that went far beyond their brief acquaintance. Maybe it was because he had experienced devastating loss, too.
Whatever it was that drew her to him, she’d had no right to ask for that kiss. Her hand dropped to the swell of her belly where her child rested. She was a mother now, and she needed to start thinking like one. She could no longer afford to follow a moment’s impulse, no matter how compelling.
The remainder of that walk had been quiet. She’d pointed out a few fallen tree limbs that she wouldn’t mind reclaiming, and he’d told her about improvements he’d made to the property over time. Conversation hadn’t been tense, exactly, but was definitely more reserved with the memory of that kiss between them.
No doubt, she’d scared him away with her revelation about the baby. Which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing given her pregnancy and her need to turn a new page in her life. She was ready to devote her heart and her time to her child.
So why was she still thinking about how Vaughn’s fingers had felt, sifting through her hair, stroking lightly down her neck? How his mouth had molded to hers gently, like he was tasting something precious?
Yanking the safety goggles the rest of the way off her head, she got the band snagged in her hair. With a curse, she stepped over to the window so she could see better to untwine the tiny snarl.
Outside, a dark gray pickup truck was backing into her driveway. With the tailgate down, tree limbs spilled from the cargo bed, a red ribbon tied around the longest end, the whole load strapped down and neatly clamped. A dog’s nose poked out of the partially open window, as if to catch the scent of new surroundings.
Vaughn and Ruby had arrived.
A ridiculous jolt of excitement chased through Abigail even though she had just finished telling herself to draw boundaries with the sexy doctor. She carefully freed the knot and the safety googles from her hair. Then, setting down the eyewear, she caught herself pausing for a quick glance in the mirror.
Damn it.
Not allowing herself any time for primping, she went straight outside in time to see Vaughn open the door for his dog, leash in hand. Ruby hopped down the running board and onto the ground, wearing her service-dog vest.
“I hope it’s not too late for a delivery,” Vaughn called, reaching into the truck to retrieve two brown paper bags. “I brought you some dinner for a bribe.”
The bags were emblazoned with the logo for the Silver Saddle, the bar and tapas restaurant inside the Bellamy, Royal’s new five-star resort. Abigail had never felt like she had the budget to indulge in any of the restaurants on the property, and her taste buds anticipated the treat as much as her rumbling stomach.
What a thoughtful gesture. Her heart squeezed tight to this new evidence of Vaughn’s warmth and generosity.
“Since when do you need to bribe women into accepting gifts from you, Dr. Chambers?” she teased, hoping to keep things lighter between them as she stepped toward the truck bed and ran a hand over one of the gnarled pecan-tree branches. “I can’t believe you loaded all of this up today. You must have been working since the moment I left your house.”
“I didn’t mind. It was a good day for a project.” He paused as another, smaller pickup truck pulled in behind him, taking up all of Abigail’s small driveway. More tree limbs spilled from the second cargo bed. “That’s my groundskeeper’s sons. They gave me a hand with it.”
Overwhelmed at the thoughtfulness of the gesture, Abigail was having a hard time holding on to the boundaries she’d planned to draw. Especially as two grinning young men sprang from the second pickup, asking where to unload the limbs.
“This is Micah and Brandon.” Vaughn made the introductions and let Abigail show the men where to lay the pieces, in a covered drying rack she’d built on the side of the house for that purpose.
“Should we give them a hand?” she asked him while the workers began unbuckling the harnesses on the first load.
Ruby stood at Vaughn’s feet, watching along with them.
“Nah, we’d only get in their way. Those two are on a mission to earn extra cash for their own landscaping business.” Vaughn shook his head with a laugh. “I can’t keep them busy enough.”
“I’m thrilled,” she told him honestly, watching the drying rack begin to fill with pieces of wood for future projects. Regardless of the reservations she had about getting closer to Vaughn, she couldn’t deny that he’d gone above and beyond to help her. “The installation at the hospital is really going to exhaust my store of raw materials, so this couldn’t have come at a better time.”
“My pleasure.” His smile, when he chose to wield it, could melt polar ice caps. “And I hope you don’t think it was presumptuous of me to bring dinner. Honestly, I was starving by the time we loaded up the trucks, and I figur
ed you might be hungry, too, after all the time we spent outdoors today.”
She wondered about that, sensing there might be more to it given the way he’d seemed to retreat after the kiss. Was this a simple olive branch to start over as friends? Or could that kiss have meant something more to him, too?
“I think it’s very kind of you.” Abigail hadn’t eaten, either. She’d been too busy trying to distract herself from thoughts of the sexy doc by immersing herself in her work. Now, she couldn’t help but think how much different her life would be if her baby had been fathered by someone like Vaughn. Someone thoughtful and caring. “After spending the first few months of my pregnancy feeling tired and depleted, my appetite has recently returned with a vengeance.”
She figured it couldn’t hurt to remind him of her baby, and where her allegiance would remain. She led him and Ruby through the house to the backyard patio, where a tiny flagstone courtyard was surrounded by plants and trees. While Vaughn began unboxing the meal, she retrieved plates and silverware from the house, along with cups and a pitcher of water. On her last trip, she remembered a bowl of water for Ruby and the matches for her outdoor lanterns.
A few minutes later, they sat across from one another at her wrought iron café table, enjoying the wealth of food Vaughn had provided. He’d moved one of her side tables from the porch down to the patio so they had more room. There were containers of bacon-wrapped dates, tiny crab empanadas, bruschetta with goat cheese and tomato, flatbreads with shrimp, crispy wonton chorizo ravioli and potato croquettes.
Vaughn had lit all four of the tiki torches filled with citronella oil to keep the mosquitoes away. The dancing flames combined with the feast made her feel like they were at a Hawaiian luau. She sat back in her seat, admiring the way the sky started to turn pink as the sun sank lower in the sky. The daylight lasted so long in the summer.
“That was fantastic,” she declared, sipping her ice-cold water while Ruby sat beside Vaughn’s chair.
“You didn’t try these yet.” Her dining companion passed a tray of more delicacies toward her. Tiny toasted puffs with a red sauce and a leafy green garnish.
“Everything is almost too pretty to eat.” She reached for one anyhow, though. “What are they?”
“Cauliflower fritters with caviar.” He lifted the water pitcher and refilled both their cups. “What do you think?”
A flutter in her belly made her smile, her hand reaching to cover the spot where she felt the phantom swirl of movement.
“I like it, and so does this baby.” With each movement, her pregnancy became more real.
“You can tell?” Vaughn’s expression shifted. Guarded, perhaps, but curious, too.
His interest touched her. She hadn’t been able to share the joys of this pregnancy with anyone. Her mother made an effort to be excited, but she was still very mired in mourning Alannah, making Abigail less apt to share new developments.
So now, she pulled her chair closer to Vaughn’s, wanting to share the wonder of something so miraculous. “May I have your hand?”
He swiped his fingers on a napkin, straightening in his chair before he rested his palm in hers. Abigail flipped it over so his hand faced down, then centered his touch high on her belly.
Warmth flooded her skin through her thin summer sheath dress. His large hand spanned her ribs, one finger trailing all the way to her navel, his thumb on her breastbone. Her mouth dried up, her heart pattering too fast, and he had to feel that. Memories of the kiss returned with new, heated intensity.
She lifted her gaze to his, losing the battle to maintain her defenses, wishing things could be different.
Then, the baby shifted.
A soft quiver of movement beneath his hand made his palm tense. Flex. His eyes went wide with a flicker of emotion.
“That’s incredible.” The awe in his voice made her remember why she’d wanted to share this with him.
It wasn’t about getting closer to him, even though his touch made her feel breathless with awareness. She’d wanted him to feel the baby because that life inside her was special. Healing.
“Isn’t it?” She let go of his fingers then, releasing him. “I haven’t shared that with anyone.” As soon as she said it, she realized how pathetic it sounded. “That is, my mother still lives in Austin and she’s still working through her grief. So it’s hard for her to be excited.”
“I understand.” Vaughn eased his hand away, but he rested it on the back of her chair, his fingers grazing her shoulder where the straps of her dress didn’t quite cover. “It’s only natural to want to celebrate something so profound. And while I’m sorry for your sake that Rich Lowell turned out to be a poor excuse for a man, I’m not sorry that his bad decisions gave me the chance to share something special with you.”
Abigail held herself very still, knowing she needed to keep a rein on her runaway emotions. Vaughn was dealing with his own struggles—a serious disorder that might make a sufferer detach from all the things Abigail was feeling right now. So drawing him deeper into her world seemed unfair to him. To her. And to her baby.
Yet those wise intentions felt a world away with Vaughn by her side, his knuckle skimming her bare shoulder.
Mesmerized by his words, by the warmth in his green eyes, she couldn’t think of a reply.
Just then, a rustle of movement and male laughter on the far side of the bungalow warned them of Vaughn’s approaching workers.
“Dr. C.” The taller of the pair, Micah, strode into the backyard first, holding up something shiny that glinted in the pink rays of the setting sun. “I wanted to deliver your extra set of truck keys before we take off. The wood is all stacked in the drying rack.”
His brother trailed a few steps behind. Vaughn stood, thanking them both. Abigail used the moment to collect her thoughts. Give herself a mental shake. Standing, she began clearing the dishes, dismayed at how quickly sizzling attraction could stamp out good sense.
“I can help with that,” Vaughn called, finishing up his conversation with the young men before covering the lawn with long strides so he could hold the back door open for her. Chivalrous. Thoughtful.
He brought Ruby with him to retrieve the rest of the leftovers from their meal and brought them to the door.
“Do you mind if she comes inside with me?” he asked. “I could set up a spot for her in the corner.”
“Ruby is absolutely welcome indoors,” Abigail assured him, making quick work of putting away the leftovers while Vaughn rinsed off the plates. “It’s fun having her around.”
She’d welcome a buffer of any sort if she was going to keep herself from swooning at Vaughn’s feet again. Or outright requesting more kisses.
“Thank you.” Closing the door behind him, he settled the dog in a quiet spot in the dining room, then began loading the flatware in the dishwasher. “Ruby has been good for me.”
He glanced over at her where Ruby made herself comfortable with her head on her paws. Seeing the two of them together today—how bonded they were—made her think it must be difficult for Vaughn to be apart from her for his long hours at the hospital.
“She must miss you while you’re working,” she observed carefully, testing the waters on the topic. Wanting to know more about him. “I’m sure you put in long hours as a surgeon.”
He placed the rest of the dishes inside the washer with the same methodical care before shutting the appliance door.
“The weeks where I’m on call are the toughest since I go in at all hours.” He rinsed and dried his hands. Turned to watch her as she wiped down the small island countertop. “Micah and Brandon will take Ruby out if their father is busy with other things, so she’s in good hands.”
“I’m glad you have extra help. She doesn’t go to the hospital?”
“There are plenty of jobs where service dogs are allowed, but ICU is a very different workplace.”
Her kitchen had never felt crowded before, but with a tall, sexy doctor beside her, dominating the space, she was all too aware of the tiny square footage.
“Surgery is my job.” His jaw flexed, his gaze fixed on a point beyond her shoulder. “It’s the one thing I can perform no matter what else is going on around me.”
If she’d missed the defensiveness in his voice, she sure would have seen it his tense arms. His rigid shoulders. Ruby must have felt the tension, too, since she rose from her seat to sit beside him, pressing her head against his thigh.
Okay.
Abigail had tested his comfort level regarding the challenges of his work environment, and found that was a do-not-cross line.
“That’s another way our jobs are very different.” Drying her hands, she retreated to a seat at one of the bar stools at the island. “Some days it feels like all the stars have to be in precise alignment for me to find the inspiration to create.”
Rattling off a few of the things that could distract her when she was supposed to be working, Abigail was glad to see Vaughn’s shoulders relax by degrees as she spoke. Even Ruby chilled out, going from a sitting position by Vaughn’s knee to lying at his feet. Yet perhaps stepping on one of his personal land mines was a constructive reminder for her.
Vaughn Chambers was a magnetic man. Talented. Thoughtful. And charismatic when he wanted to be. But she couldn’t allow herself to forget he wrestled demons in his spare time, and they weren’t the kind that stepped aside to make room for a wishful heart like hers.
Five
Two nights later, Vaughn finished dictating his shift notes into his phone and sent them to transcription for updating his office files. Seated in a far corner of the nurses’ station, he tuned out the noise around him. He’d already done rounds with the next critical-care team on duty, but inevitably he found a few additional thoughts cropping up before he left the hospital for the day. His knife-fight victim was recovering nicely, with no major organ involvement. There would be therapy for a sliced knee tendon and, later, elective surgery to repair a torn labrum in the right shoulder, a result of his attacker pinning his arm behind him. All things considered, the guy was damn lucky.