This time I couldn’t stop the giggle from escaping. “Sorry.”
“What do you have to be sorry for?” He squeezed my knee and for some reason that helped me relax.
“For being a bit freaked out. This isn’t what I’d expected tonight would be like.” He wasn’t at all like the Dom I’d pictured in my head. In so many ways he was much better.
“How so?” The glint was back in his eyes and I could tell he was at least seeing the humor in the situation as much as I was.
“First, a distinct lack of nudity.” I shifted in my chair, but not enough to break his touch. “Honestly, I didn’t think there would be this much talking. Connie never mentioned that there would be talking.” To be fair to her, she didn’t say much of anything. She’d always believed in experience being the best teacher.
Master Gareth cocked his head to the side and frowned for a moment. “You’re a stranger to me. I don’t know what your limits are, your likes or dislikes. I’m also a man with a certain amount of pride. I hate failing to live up to expectations.”
“I guess I can appreciate that.” Man with an ego and humility. He was worlds apart from my last boyfriend.
“And I’m a stranger to you, Liz. One who will end up having you in some compromising positions. I think taking a few moments to have a conversation and get to know each other would be prudent. Don’t you?”
“Yeah. That makes sense.” Smart, sexy and dominant.
I totally ignored the part of my girl brain that perked up and wanted to ask for his phone number. Because buying him for a night was all well and good, but starting to think about the possibility of having a relationship with him went well beyond what I should be considering just then. I could tell he was calm, where I tended to bounce through life. It would do me some good to find such a person.
“Liz, can you look at me?”
It was funny, I hadn’t even realized I’d broken eye contact. Connie always teased me that it was the biggest sign that I was a natural submissive. Get me in the room with a dominant man and I’m incapable of seeing higher than someone’s knees. I found it infuriating.
Master Gareth had beautiful eyes, so why wouldn’t I want to look at them? They weren’t in the least bit feminine, but had a depth to them that I wouldn’t normally associate with a man. There wasn’t an ounce of fat anywhere on him from what I could see. I wouldn’t go so far to say his looks were perfect, but few people could be called that. I wouldn’t want him to be either. Imperfections make for a far more interesting person.
I hugged my arms around my middle and hoped I wasn’t showing my muffin top.
“Why did you come here tonight?” There was no malice in those eyes. Gareth was curious, was taking the time to get to know me, even if it was only for one night. That was more than I could say about a lot of the men I’d been dating. Connie would of course argue that meant I was dating the wrong guys. I couldn’t disagree with her.
Why did I come here tonight? It was more than pressure from Connie to get out and explore my options. It was probably the first time I took a chance on something like this, reached for something that I didn’t simply want, but needed. This time I made sure to hold his gaze. I didn’t want him to have any false impressions.
“Because I needed to know.” And that was the God’s honest truth. Saying I was curious was all well and good, but there was a lot more to it than that. I had to know if this was really who I was, or if it was nothing more than a fantasy. If it was the latter, then I would go home and buy up every e-book I could find with BDSM as the theme. If it was the former…well, I’d have to figure that out as I went.
He gave my knee a final squeeze before letting his hand dangle once more. “Then I’ll help you.”
My head began to spin and I had to pull in a few deep breaths to settle my nerves. I’m not sure if it was relief or fear, but either way it was a rush.
“This is really going to happen.” Yes, I’d paid the money, but this whole night didn’t seem real yet. A wonderful dream with the perfect man cast as my Dom. A bevy of undiscovered pleasured stretched out before me.
“If you want it to. But only if you’re honest with me and yourself. I’m not a miracle worker, a psychologist or a magician. We’ll be in this together tonight, taking things as far as you want them to go. But only if you’re honest with both of us.”
I nodded. Yeah, I got that and for once the idea of laying it all out there for someone to see didn’t freak me out. “I think I’m a submissive.”
“And you wanted to spend some time with a Dom to find out for certain?”
“Yeah.”
“Why the auction? I’m sure Connie could have put you in touch with some people if you had questions.”
“She’d tried, but I always wussed out. She was the one who suggested I come tonight. I wanted something…”
“Safe?”
“Contained. If things weren’t what I’d expected, I wanted to make sure it only lasted one night.”
“Why?”
Licking my lips, I tried to find the right words. “If things didn’t go the way I thought they might, I knew I would be able to walk away. This is only for one night.”
Master Gareth nodded. He linked his fingers together and leaned a bit farther forward on his feet. “Why?”
I twisted in my seat. “I’ve had a few boyfriends in the past, but I never really felt satisfied with them. I was drifting along and none of them seemed able to anchor me.”
“Was there anything any of them did sexually that aroused you?”
Poor John. The memory of his face and the look he’d had on it when I’d asked him to spank me was forever burned there. “Spankings were good for me. None of them were willing to try anything more than that. I think I freaked a few of them out with even the suggestion of something more.”
Master Gareth got to his feet but didn’t move away. He towered over me, his groin just about at face level. The leather pants left little to the imagination, hugging his half-hard cock.
Oh my.
It would be so easy to lean forward and press my face against the hard ridge of his shaft. I would mouth at him until he pulled me away by my hair, yanked the button from its mooring and shoved his cock in my mouth.
“What do you fantasize about when you are alone? When there’s nothing but you and your handy vibrator, what do you think about?”
Yeah, I was blushing hard. Though whether it was from the heated nature of my thoughts or the need to spell out what I did when I got myself off, I couldn’t be sure. I imaged it would be poor form to say you given I’d just met the man. Honest, but unnecessary pressure. Maybe he wouldn’t mind?
“I’m not sure I can put it into words.” I licked my lips in an attempt to cover up the blatant lie. I didn’t know if I would sound like a freak for saying the truth out loud.
“Liz, I want you to close your eyes.” I did without hesitation. It was getting easier to do what he said. “Now, tell me what you see.”
I squeezed my hands a bit tighter in my lap. The images that popped into my head were always consistent, always set to get me turned-on. “I see a man who is larger than me. He tells me what to do, takes away my choices in the bedroom. I don’t want to think or decide or have to ask. I want him to simply know what I want when I want it. Hardly fair, I need to be with a mind reader.”
“Liz.” There was a warning note in his voice. It was strange to have someone pick up on my deflection techniques so quickly after first meeting them.
“I want to do what he says. If he wants to fuck my ass or have me give him a blow job, then that’s what I’ll do.” I opened my eyes then and looked at him. Really looked at him. Somehow I knew there was something special going on tonight. I had taken a step into becoming someone else. An evolution of me into someone I didn’t yet know.
I’m not sure what he saw standing there, what insights he gained by seeing me sitting before him, but something on his face changed. He leaned back and for a momen
t I understood what it would feel like to be under a magnifying glass.
I wasn’t about to let that intense look scare me off. I knew I wasn’t able to hold anything back now that I’d finally started talking. “Does that make me some sort of anti-feminist? I mean, what kind of woman wants to give up that kind of control to a man?”
Master Gareth didn’t speak right away. While I knew what I said was probably the least shocking thing he’d ever heard in his life as a Dom, it was still a big step for me. I hadn’t even said all of that to Connie and she was a sub and definitely someone who would understand. But she was confident in her ability to let go and let Stephen flog her senseless, tie her up and do what he wanted or withhold her orgasm until she was nearly delirious from need. They’d worked out the playbook and knew the calls.
I was still figuring out what the game was.
It was like taking a giant leap backward and becoming an awkward teenager once more. Never knowing what to do or say, what made me a freak or what was simply me being different. I wasn’t old, but you’d think at twenty-six I’d have some of this stuff figured out by now.
“It’s been my experience that it takes a very strong person to admit to needing help.” He moved around to stand behind me. I shivered when I felt him lean forward so his mouth was close to my ear. “How long have you had these longings?”
Forever. “A while now.”
“And you wanted tonight to see if this was something you could do?”
“I need to know that this isn’t some kind of mistake. Before I get into another relationship and fuck that up too, I have to have my head around what it is I need. Before I ask someone for something I can’t really see through. I—” This really shouldn’t have been so difficult. I tended to do things the hard way when it wasn’t necessary.
On impulse, I slipped from the chair to my knees and stayed there. If I couldn’t make the words say what I wanted, then I could do this. Every cell in my body felt like it was vibrating with lust and impatience.
There was a pause and then the sound of the chair being pushed aside. “I have rules.”
Rules were good. I liked rules.
His hand was warm on my shoulder and surprisingly comforting considering I’d just met the man. I’d never been foolish enough to believe in love at first sight, but even I couldn’t deny the connection between us. While trust needs to be earned in most cases, for tonight I was willing to nudge my caution to the side and go with the flow.
“I’ve already told you rule one, refer to me as Sir.”
I nodded. “Yes Sir.”
“See, you’re doing fine already. Second rule, if I do something you don’t like you need to tell me. You will say red if you want me to stop. Yellow and I’ll slow things down.”
Colors were nice and simple. “I can do that.”
The hand on my shoulder gave me a squeeze.
“Sir! I can do that, Sir.” Dummy.
“Good girl.”
His other hand took up position on my free shoulder. For the first time since I’d entered the club I felt grounded. I loved the feeling of his hands on my skin, how it drew another shiver from deep inside and caused my blood to surge. I was flying blind, but it was certainly a rush.
“Liz, I need to know if there is anything that freaks you out. The dark? Loss of breath? Being yelled at?”
“Nothing, Sir.” There was that one time I’d freaked out when I’d gone indoor rock climbing, but I doubted he was going to send me scurrying up a wall any time soon.
“Pain threshold?”
“One of the boyfriends I asked to spank me? When he did, his hand ended up hurting before my ass did, Sir.” John had dumped me a week later. Despite what Connie said, I knew that was the reason why. He wasn’t able to meet my gaze for days after, as if I’d turned into some sort of three-headed freak. Sure, I might be better off without him, but it had still hurt.
The bastard.
Another squeeze, this time a lot harder. “From this point on I want you to stop thinking, Liz. I’m in charge now. Your body belongs to me and I will do with it what I want. Do you understand?”
I couldn’t resist looking up at him. “This is really going to happen?”
I’m not sure if it was because we weren’t that far into the scene or if I was suddenly speaking to the man behind the Dom. Either way, Master Gareth gave me a small smile.
Logically I knew he wasn’t two separate people, but I swear in that moment I could see a lot more than the Dom mask he’d been wearing up to this point. Maybe a mask wasn’t the right description and he was simply good at hiding his emotions from others. Either way, I could tell he was used to keeping a part of himself held back.
I knew because it was something I did too.
Maybe someone had hurt him at one point? Wouldn’t that be ironic?
Master Gareth’s slight smile melted from his lips. The spark was still present in his eyes which served to keep me calm and focused on him.
“You paid your money. I’m here to do what you want, which is to take over. If you don’t want this we can do something else. I would hate for you to feel some sort of pressure to continue on because of the auction, what Connie said or any other reason. I don’t mind talking about the lifestyle if you want more information. Though I could point you to some good websites for that.”
“No! Sir, I’m good. Please. I’m ready for this.”
Master Gareth reached down and cupped my chin. His gentle pull stretched my head back not quite to the point of pain. I gasped and let my eyes slip closed. He didn’t let go, didn’t relent. His fingers dug into the sensitive skin of my throat and gently squeezed. It wasn’t enough to cut off my oxygen, but the sudden possessive and controlling move had my cunt clenching at the prospect of an amazing fuck.
“You need to stop your mind from spinning.” He squeezed a bit harder. “And don’t think for a moment I can’t tell when you’ve got something buzzing around in there.”
It was hard to blank my mind, though I made a valiant attempt. Instead I concentrated on the pull of his calloused fingers across my throat. The ache of my neck muscles as I held the awkward angle. I didn’t dare move. I didn’t want to. It felt amazing to have his hand holding me firmly, pressing me into the floor with the strength of his will. Fuck, it was quite the rush.
“You will do what I say when I say. There will be no hesitation. If you have a genuine problem with anything, remember to say either red or yellow. No won’t stop me. Stop won’t stop me. Begging and pleading won’t get you what you want either.”
“Sir.” And in that moment I felt relief.
He understood.
Gareth wasn’t humoring me, or trying to simply fulfill the auction bid. In a matter of a few minutes he got me. It was weird and electrifying all wrapped into one overwhelming package of awareness.
I couldn’t stop the moan from escaping when he released the pressure on my throat. How could I miss the contact already? Was I that pathetic that the least bit of attention turned me into a panting, needy whore? The ping on the end of my nose had me snap my eyes open.
Right. No thinking.
“There is more to being a good submissive than doing what you’re told. It’s important, but not the be all and end all.” He moved once again and with my eyes closed it was challenging to track him. “Tonight we’ll keep things simple.”
Would there be other nights? Would I even want other nights? I couldn’t help but think yes, given how strongly I was reacting to him. It would be very easy to lose myself in him. Now I understood what Connie had been trying to tell me for months.
Without realizing he’d gotten close, I gasped when his hand plunged into my corset, found my nipple and squeezed tight. The pain jerked me back to the room and Gareth.
“I said no thinking, Liz.” The slight smile that had played on his lips was gone now. I was surprised how different he looked, all hard angles and iron control. “If you can’t listen to me on this simple thing, then th
is will not work out.”
Oh no, no, no, no! “I’m sorry, Sir. I’ll do better.”
“Yes you will. Part of the problem is your clothing. It’s a distraction. Take them off, fold them and place them by the door.”
Wait.
What?
“You’re not moving. Do it now, Liz, or else leave.”
There was no room for negotiation in that tone. There was no softness in his gaze or body. Gareth stood there staring at me, arms crossed and legs spread shoulder-width apart. If I had been thinking I would have freaked out. I hardly knew the man and he wanted me to get naked in front of him while he remained fully clothed. It was probably the most insane thing I’d ever been asked to do in my life.
I don’t think I’ve ever moved so quickly before in my life. Sure my fingers shook as I pulled at the knot holding the front of my corset together, but I somehow managed to get it open. The damn thing proved harder to fold than I first figured it would be. I didn’t want him to change his mind and kick me out because I’d moved too slow, so I folded the damn thing in half and jogged over to the door to place it on the floor.
If nothing else I could go with the flow.
My jeans were easier to fold, but ended up being harder to remove. I wasn’t wearing panties beneath and he would get an eyeful right away. I’m still not sure what had possessed me to skip putting on my intimates, but it had somehow seemed appropriate given where the auction was being held. Honestly, I didn’t think anyone would be in a position to have noticed.
Too late for regrets.
I kicked off my heels as I undid the button. The denim pulled off easily and I had it folded and placed on the corset before I turned around to face Gareth once more. I could feel a blush heat my face and I hoped he didn’t hold that against me.
My hands twitched at my side as Gareth’s gaze slid down my body. God, I wanted nothing more than to cover myself then. I’d never been particularly good at making it to the gym on a regular basis, so there was a bit extra of me around my middle, ass, thighs…okay, everywhere. Most men didn’t seem to mind, but I’d always been self-conscious about my weight.
Dom for Sale Page 3