“He got seasick and vomited. I was helping him back to the room when we heard the page and came running.”
Vangie and the twins look at the crippled CEO and smirk.
“Well, he didn’t run. I ran. Like a bat out of fucking hell.”
“Language, Tink!” Jeffrey bellows, taking his frustration out on me.
“Oh, shut it.”
“Wait,” Lake says with a puzzled look on his face. “Why were you two together? I thought you hated each other.” Perceptive little shit.
“We do,” Jeff insists. “She’s infuriatingly overbearing. How do you kids stand it?”
Evangeline huffs in frustration. “God, Daddy. Do you have to be so mean? She’s helping you and you’re just...you’re just rude!”
He gets a pained look on his face, pulling his lips into a flat line. “You’re right, Vangie.” He turns to me and gives a half-assed apology before motioning for his daughter to go ahead of him into the room. “I’m gonna go get cleaned up. We’ll see you later,” he says, dismissing me and the boys.
“You sure you don’t need some help with that mess?” I offer, enjoying his discomfort a little more than I should be.
“No,” he growls. “You’ve done quite enough.”
“Great. After all of this, I think I need a drink.”
Jeff looks down into his lap and dry heaves. “I’m pretty sure that’s the last thing you need.”
After stopping at one of the bars for a cocktail—because he’s not my fucking boss—the boys and I go back to the room to get ready for dinner. When I push the door open, the twins’ noses crinkle in disgust.
“Oh my God,” Lake groans, walking into the room. “What died in here?”
Oh, shit.
“Gigi...” Landon says, suspicion coloring his tone. “Did the CEO get sick in our room?”
Holding their noses, the boys look around at the evidence all over the carpet in front of the vanity and on my sleep shirt.
I’m not about to tell these kids I puked on his fucking dick. “Yes. Okay. Don’t tell Vangie.” I eye Landon, who’s sporting an evil smirk. “I mean it. Jeffrey already can’t stand me.”
“He can’t stand you so much that you two were hanging out in our room together?” Landon asks.
“Near your bed...” Lake adds.
I cross my arms on my chest, looking up at the ceiling and around the room. “Anywhere in the cabin is near the bed, smart ass.”
“I’m sure you two were what? Playing cards?” I want to slap that smirk right off Lake’s face.
“Exactly,” I agree.
Landon hangs his head, laughing as he echoes my lie. “Exactly.”
CHAPTER TEN
JEFFREY
WELL, THAT WAS a first. I’ve had girls gag on my junk, sure. But, projectile vomit? Never. I pretended to still be seasick last night in order to avoid running into Tink and the boys in the dining room, opting to order room service for dinner instead.
Today we’re docked in Cozumel and while I’m still limping a bit, my ankle feels a million times better. It’s our first excursion, and I know, thanks to Vangie’s constant whining, that her little boyfriend and posse will not be accompanying us to swim with the dolphins. I’m looking forward to a little one-on-one time with my girls.
We get off the ship and hail a cab to our excursion site, Chankanaab Park, where I booked the royal swim package, allowing us the most time with the animals. The one thing Evangeline asked for on this trip was to be able to swim with dolphins. She’s been obsessed with them from the time she was around Willow’s age. I can’t wait to see the look on her face when she finally gets to touch one.
After fitting us into life vests, our guide Mary leads us, along with five others, to a fenced-off area in the ocean. The water is the bluest I’ve ever seen and surprisingly warm.
“All right guys,” our guide announces, garnering the attention of our group of eight. “When it’s your turn, you’re going to stand like this with your arms straight out to either side of your body.” As soon as she does this, two dorsal fins pop up right beneath her hands. And when she closes her fingers around them, the dolphins—Ana and Christian—take off, pulling her along for the ride.
“My turn,” Willow squeals, making grabby hands for the amazing creatures.
Being the baby of the group gets her preferential treatment. Immediately, everyone looks to me, nodding their approval at allowing her to be first.
“Put your hands out just like the lady did and hold on tight,” I whisper into my baby’s ear as I pass her over to Mary.
She pulls her just far enough out that I can’t hear what they’re saying, but there is no missing the high-pitched scream and the laugh that follows when they take off.
A hand tightens around my arm and I look down to find Evangeline with the biggest and most genuine smile I think I’ve ever seen. “Oh my God, Dad. I’m about to ride a dolphin!”
“Two actually. Who’s the best daddy in the whole world?” I gloat, puffing up with pride. Hey, I spent a lot of damn money to make her dreams come true. I want my praises.
“You always were...even before this,” my sweet girl says. “But this is so cool. I might even clean my room to repay you.” She winks and I snort. You can’t even walk in that room. It’s an ongoing battle, and I know damn well she’s not cleaning it when we return from vacation. She’ll find some reason to hate me again by then.
“Are you ready?” Mary asks Vangie after passing Willow back to me. Her arms are like a boa constrictor choking my neck.
“Daddy. I want a dolphin for Christmas!”
“No.” I won’t even spend a second entertaining this nonsense. I already have to listen to her constant begging for a puppy, a kitty, a pony, etc. Keeping myself and two children alive is plenty enough for me.
Evangeline shakes with excitement as she’s lead out to the middle of our enclosure. Her hand lifts to her mouth, and she blows her sister and me a kiss before tuning in to whatever the guide is telling her. Then she’s off. My heart swells with insurmountable pride. There is nothing else in the world like this feeling, knowing I put that huge smile on her face.
“Come on, Daddy,” Mary says.
Vangie hasn’t yet stopped grinning when she grabs Willow from my arms, pushing me out into the water.
Mary repeats her instructions then steps back. Before I’ve even stretched my arms all the way out, I feel something hard nudge my ass. What the f—? My body jerks, and I reach behind me, blindly swatting as I try to figure out what’s just assaulted me.
“No, Christian!” Mary shouts, making some gesture to the huge mammal that’s probably about to eat me, just before his snout is back between my legs.
“Daddy!” Willow screams. “Help my daddy!”
Trying not to panic, I kick my legs at the beast. “Get!”
“I’m so sorry, sir. It’s breeding season,” Mary shrugs, trying not to laugh with the rest of our crew when the horny dolphin continues poking around between my legs like a dog.
“Ew!” Evangeline shouts. “Daddy, his thing is sticking out! Oh my God. He wants to have sex with you!”
Sex? Did my baby just say the words thing and sex? Then what she said registers, and I push that problem aside for another day because I’m about to get raped by a fucking dolphin.
“Sir, calm down. I’m going to try to get him off of you,” Mary gets out between guffaws.
“I’m not about to just float here and let him have his way with me.” My feet are now frantically kicking at the randy, four-hundred pound defiler. I don’t stand a fucking chance. He’s twice my size.
“Daddy,” Willow cries. “Watch out! It has a snake tummin’ outta its tail. It’s gunna bite you!”
I make the mistake of looking and damn near pass out. His fucking dick is as big as my arm. My heart is about to explode with how rapidly it’s beating. I can’t fucking breathe. I think I may be hyperventilating.
The next thing I know there are a
few other trainers in the water trying to persuade the rapist dolphin to leave me alone, and my girls are nowhere to be seen. “Where are my kids?”
“We had everyone else leave the tank as a safety precaution.”
At least I know neither of my girls will be Christian’s next victim.
§
“Gigi!” Willow shouts just as we’re finally making it out to the beach area to relax and unwind from my attack before heading back onto the cruise ship. My heart dips as I spin around looking to see if that damn woman is actually here. They weren’t supposed to be here, I whine in my subconscious. Sure enough, my daughter is already cuddled up in her lap beneath a thatched hut near the water.
“Landon! I didn’t think I’d get to see you today.” Evangeline runs into that boy’s waiting arms, and I have the sudden urge to hurl.
This vacation is the dumbest idea I’ve ever had. Vangie’s got a boyfriend, I twisted my ankle, my dick got puked on, and I was sexually harassed by a fucking dolphin.
“Thought you were swimming with dolphins today?” Landon returns, kissing the side of her face. He has the good sense to blush when I shoot him a pair of warning eyes.
Motherfucker.
I purse my lips at Vangie, warning her not to talk about it. But Willow takes it upon herself to be my life ruiner. And to think, she used to be my favorite. “We swimmed with dolphins, and a snake crawled outta one’s butt and it was chasing Daddy. He almost died!”
“What!?” Savage shouts, looking up from the sand fort he’s been so busily working on. “That is so cool. I wish I coulda saw.”
Confusion mars Gina’s face. “Wait...what?”
“It got a hard-on when it was Dad’s turn to ride.” Vangie blushes. “I thought it was going to drown him.” My daughter and I are going to have a good long talk about her vocabulary soon. Is she old enough to know about hard-ons? I don’t want her to be.
Tink’s lips pull in, flattening into a straight line, then her cheeks hollow out as she tries extra hard to hold her laughter.
“Oh, go on,” I grumble, falling into the empty lounge chair beside her. All of the other huts are taken. I decide I’ll endure her company just for a place to rest. Fighting off Christian’s cock was exhausting.
As soon as she has my blessing, she folds over in hysterics. Spit sprays from her mouth. “How—how big was it?” she finally asks once she gets ahold of herself.
The kids have run off, out of hearing distance to splash in the water, so I humor her. “Like two feet.” I inwardly cringe visualizing it.
“No shit...” I can see the wheels in her head turning. “That’s impressive.”
“I can honestly say that I wasn’t all that impressed.”
“Did you get any pictures?” she asks.
Shaking my head, I stare at the beautiful vixen beside me. “I wasn’t exactly worried about snapping pictures of my assailant’s weapon. Sorry.”
“S’okay...I just have a fascination with penises.”
“Is that so?” I ask, although this doesn’t surprise me in the least.
Gina nods, cracking a big grin. “Like, did you know sea slugs lose their dicks every time they have sex? It stays hard and just drags the ground ’til it falls off.”
“Kind of like a bee loses its stinger?”
“Not exactly. They don’t die...It just breaks off and floats away...Then they grow a new one within a day and are ready to do it all over again.”
Automatically my thoughts drift to what happens to that penis once it starts to float off into the ocean, and I shiver.
“What?”
“I was just thinking of the poor unsuspecting fish that’s gonna eat that rogue pecker, thinking it’s a worm.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
GINA
“HEY, SPENCE,” I answer, rubbing crusties from my eyes. It’s still pitch black in our room, but that doesn’t mean a thing. Our cabin is in the center of the ship, with no windows. If not for my alarm clock and godsons ensuring I get out of bed each day, I’d probably sleep the whole week away.
“Gi...Don’t tell me you were still asleep. It’s after nine. Don’t y’all have ziplining today?”
Yawn. “Yep. I was just about to get up and wake the kids. We meet at the port at half past ten.”
“You sound like you had a late night?” Spence teases.
Did I ever. After my pussy took a pounding riding fucking horses in Belize yesterday, Jeff beat it to a pulp when he nailed me behind a row of stacked chairs once the main deck cleared out last night. I don’t know how the hell I’ll handle the harness between my legs today. “Yeah, Jeff and I hung out in the comedy club then met back up and uh...” I shine my phone toward the bunks to see if the kids are still sleeping, “hooked up,” I whisper, “after we got the kids to sleep.”
My best friend clears her throat loudly. “You and Jeff sure have been doing a lot of hooking up on this trip.”
“Stop,” I hiss. “It’s convenient. And he has the biggest penis I’ve ever seen.”
“You sure this isn’t more than sex?”
No. “Yes,” I lie. “I told you...Landon is seeing his older daughter, and the other is trying to trap Savage into marriage. We’re together most of the time, and I like his penis...a lot.”
“I miss Coop’s penis,” my best friend whines into the phone.
“Quit,” I growl. “What did I tell you about talking to me about his dick? We’re like siblings. It’s fucking weird, Spencer.”
“But you love talking about penises.”
“Not his!”
“But bestie, you’re the only person I can complain to.” Oh man, here come the horny tears. “I still have five more weeks of no sex, which means it will be at least three before I can convince him to fuck me. I’m dying.”
“Oh damn, look at the time...I gotta get these kids up and ready to go.”
“You’re a terrible friend.”
I glance back over to the sleeping pile of her children and roll my eyes. “The worst. Now go make out with your husband or something while I take your children to have some fun.”
A loud sob nearly pierces my eardrum, and I yank the phone away. “Oh, God. I’m sorry, Gigi. You’re the best friend in the whole world. I didn’t even mean that.”
“I know. I’m used to you and your post-baby, orgasm-deprived ass by now. No worries.”
“I love you, Gina.”
“Love you too, bestie.” After smooching my lips at her a few times I end the call, then round up my troops and head out to meet the Ryans, who happen to be on the same excursion as us today.
§
“Hello, everyone! My name is Rafiki, and I am going to make sure you have the time of your lives here at Family Zipline Tours of Roatan. You did the right thing booking your excursion with us.” His Jamaican-style accent and box braids make me smile. It feels so Caribbean. “Children under five years will go over there.” Rafiki points to a kid-sized obstacle course with zip lines that can’t be but four to five feet from the ground. “We have lots of island mamas to watch over your little ones and ensure they have a safe and fun time.”
Savage of course groans, loudly. “Ugh. Why can’t I come on the big ones with you? I’m not a baby.”
“You’ll be big enough next time. It’s a good thing you met Willow though. You’ll have a friend to play with.” I try to sound encouraging, but all he does is roll his eyes.
“Yeah, husban, you getta pway wif me.” Willow takes Kyle by the arm and begins pulling him toward the group of women who’ve just arrived to fetch them.
“Kyle?” Jeff calls and the two little ones spin back around. “Will you look out for Willow for me? You’re very mature for your age, and she doesn’t like being around strangers.”
Kyle’s face brightens considerably, and he nods, giving the CEO a thumbs up.
“Thank you for that,” I say watching my little man puff up his chest and walk over to join the guides with his pride back intact.
&nbs
p; “It was nothing,” Jeff says, shrugging me off. “He just needed his big-boyhood stroked a little.”
“What about you?” I ask, snickering.
“What about me?” Jeff leans in close, his breath hot against my ear. I can smell the cinnamon in his Big Red gum. I want to grab his face and eat it, but the kids are around, and that would be horribly inappropriate.
“Do you need your big-boyhood stroked as well?”
“Eww, Aunt Gina!” Lake shouts, causing every head in our group to turn in my direction. Guess that didn’t come out as quiet as I thought.
Jeff’s body vibrates next to mine with the force of his laughter as I tuck my head into his shoulder.
“Can I help you with something?” Rafiki pauses his safety speech to ask.
“No, sir. Sorry. Gina here has really bad gas and just let one rip. You know teen boys.” Jeff shrugs pointing with his thumb to Lake and Landon and everyone giggles.
“Great!” I grumble. “Thanks for that. Now I’ll be known as fart girl the whole trip.”
§
“Are you sure this thing won’t drop me?” I ask the guide as he straps my harness to the zippy thingie. I’m the last in our crew, and in hindsight, I probably should have gone first, because watching them all fly over the jungle has done nothing to settle my nerves. In fact, it may have made it worse. I could be having a heart attack. “Is it normal for my heart to beat this fast?” I ask the man, who’s getting a kick out of my fear.
“Ma’am, you just watched your children and husband do it. You will be fine.”
My wha? “He’s not my husbaaaa—” My stomach plummets to my toes as I’m sent flying a hundred feet over a ravine. The rush of the wind is smothering me. I can’t freaking breathe. Oh God. No. No, no, no. A sudden and extreme urge to urinate has me twisting my ankles together. Will this fucking thing ever reach the other end?
“Oh my God,” Lake yells when I’m about halfway across the line. “Did she just pee? Guys, I think she peed!”
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