“Not really,” she said with a mouthful of food. “How much did I tell you?”
“That your ass of a boyfriend broke up with you because he fell in love.”
Had she not told him about Rory being gay? She waited for Tommy to continue, offer some hint that he knew. Embarrassment crept back into her head. How could she have been with someone—been in love with him—and been so clueless about his lack of interest?
“That about sums it up.” She tucked into her food in earnest, grateful that Tommy knew his way around a hangover. As she ate, more things began to click into place in regard to her relationship with Rory. His desire to wait until they were married, which had often left her feeling undesirable, made so much more sense now. She was undesirable to him. Lack of a penis would do that.
What did it say about her that he thought she was aware of everything and still wanted to marry him? She might be clueless, but she would never want to live a lie. The lack of passion when they kissed, the few fumbling attempts at anything further—it all made so much sense now.
“What are you thinking about?” Tommy asked, pulling her from her thoughts.
“This food is so good. I don’t remember ever being that drunk. I can handle my liquor. A night of Guinness and Irish whiskey and I’ve no problems. Whatever frilly drinks those girls poured into me about did me in.” She reached across the table and touched his hand. “Thank you for taking care of me.”
“You were hard to say no to.”
“Must not’ve been too hard. I woke fully dressed, and I think I recall telling you to fuck me.”
Just then, Sean came through the basement door and laughed. The man had the worst timing.
“You know, Cupcake, I can fix you up with someone who can help you with that if my little brother won’t.”
Deirdre had watched her brothers fight all the time over the years, but barbs like this she wasn’t used to. Tommy backhanded his brother’s torso as he walked past and opened the refrigerator.
“Just sayin’.” Sean turned and set three bottles of water on the table. “You need water as much as the grease,” he said to her.
He bit into one of the hot dogs that Tommy had left out. “In case you’re unaware, I’m just teasing him. And if he’d fucked you last night and left you feeling full of regrets this morning, we would’ve kicked his ass. We might be a rude, crude bunch, but we treat women better than that.”
Deirdre couldn’t speak for Sean, but she already knew that about Tommy.
* * *
Tommy wanted to kill Sean. His brother had a habit of popping up at the worst possible moments. He’d wanted to have the chance to talk with Deirdre about her demand for sex last night. He definitely wanted to get back to that point. And now he had little time left. He had a client coming within the hour.
“Am I making you late for something?” Deirdre asked.
“No. I have work in a while though. Are you working today?”
She shook her head and guzzled the bottle of water Sean had given her. “Tomorrow. Today, I’m going to work on some new recipes.”
“You want to go out later?”
“I have work tomorrow.”
“What does that have to do with tonight?”
“I wake up at three thirty to be at the bakery by five.”
“Damn. Why bother going to bed at all?” Sean asked.
“I doubt I’ll have trouble sleeping tonight.” She crumpled her empty papers and stuffed them in the bag. “I’ll get out of your hair. Thanks again for everything. Tell Norah I’ll wash the clothes and return them.”
He jumped up. “I’ll walk you.”
She rolled her eyes, but didn’t tell him not to. Progress. She ran downstairs to grab her stuff.
As they walked through the living room, his dad was in his usual spot on the couch. “Hey, Dad, there’s food on the table if you want some. Better hurry though, Sean’s in there. And test yourself.”
Dad grunted at him. Tommy had tried to help him test his blood to make sure his diabetes was under control, but Dad always yelled that he was doing it wrong. It was a little too reminiscent of childhood, when he’d done nothing right according to his dad.
“You have an odd relationship with your father,” Deirdre said once they were outside.
“How so?”
“You don’t talk much. In my house, if someone brought food, we’d all sit around together. He just seems to be off on his own. And he didn’t even ask who I was. There’s no way my brothers could walk out holding hands with a girl and not be stopped for some serious questioning.”
At the curb, he pulled her to a stop. “I’m an adult. Although it’s his house, my dad doesn’t care much about what we do.”
He’d given up trying to talk to his dad many years ago. That was what his siblings were for. If he needed to vent and fight, he went to Sean. If he wanted advice, Jimmy. Talk about girls, Norah. There had to be some perk in having a sister. He didn’t depend on his dad for much.
Right now, he had very little time left with Deirdre, and the last thing he wanted to think about was his dad. He stroked a thumb across the back of her hand. “About last night—”
“Please don’t. I made a fool of myself and I’m doing my best to forget about it.”
“Fool is harsh. You weren’t a pretty drunk, I’ll give you that, but you weren’t a fool. You were hurting.”
“I said a lot of stupid things.”
“You’re in luck. You were so drunk that your accent was thick and hard to understand. After I told you to slow down, it was easier to get, but that was right before you asked about Sean calling you Cupcake. So most of what you said while we were standing outside never made it to my brain.”
Her gaze darted across the street.
“I want to sleep with you, Deirdre. I get hard just thinking about you naked. But I respect that you want to wait until you’re married. I don’t understand it, because what if you marry a guy who’s a dud in bed? You wouldn’t know until you’re stuck with him.”
His words did what he’d wanted. She laughed loud.
“You’re horrible,” she said.
He leaned down and brushed his lips over hers. “But I’m not a dud in bed. I’ve already proven that.”
She sighed and leaned in to kiss him again. The kiss wasn’t totally innocent, but it wasn’t a take-me-to-bed-now kiss either. When he pulled away, he asked, “Can I see you tonight?”
She rested her forehead on his shoulder. “I really do go to bed early. Call me first.”
“Okay.” She released his hand and turned to cross the street. He followed.
“What are you doing?”
“Walking you home.”
She stopped on the opposite curb. “You could’ve watched me from where you were.”
“Yeah, but then I wouldn’t get to kiss you again.”
They walked up the stairs and he did just that. He kissed her until his jeans were too snug and she was breathless, hoping it would entice her enough to want to make time to see him later.
When she went inside, he ran home, grabbed his keys, and drove to work. The sun warmed him as he zigzagged through traffic. He parked down the block from Ink Envy and got out of his car. He took a deep breath, enjoying the spring air. He couldn’t wait for summer. Being cooped up all winter made him miserable.
He walked through the door and something flew past his face. His coworkers Karla and Puck were at it again. Tommy didn’t know what it was with the two of them, but they were always fighting. Sometimes it was like sibling crap, and other times, it was like there was an undercurrent of sexual tension. No one ever talked about it because Kai would probably throw a fit.
Over the two years that he’d worked for Kai, one thing that Kai always made clear was that this was a place of business. Personal shit didn’t belong here.
“Stop fucking around,” Kai said from the doorway to his office. Karla and Puck looked in opposite directions like two little kids. To Tommy, Ka
i said, “Thought you were coming in early.”
Tommy checked the clock. “I am. Lenny’s not due for like another twenty minutes.”
“We need to talk about the art.”
It was never good when Kai wanted to talk about anything. Kai didn’t like to talk, which meant that Tommy had screwed something up. He walked toward the office. “I sent Lenny a copy. He approved it.”
“I know.”
Once inside, Tommy looked at Kai to see if he should close the door. Kai waved, and Tommy took it to mean he didn’t have to close it. That meant the bitching wouldn’t be too bad. Kai always offered privacy for a good chewing-out.
“What’s the problem?”
“The client doesn’t always know what’s best. They’re looking at an overall picture, and if it kind of matches what they envisioned, they’re going to approve.” Kai slid a paper across the desk. The drawing Tommy had done for Lenny. “You can make these colors pop more, change the outline a bit, and it will make the whole thing more vivid.”
Kai handed him a second picture. It was the same image, but Tommy knew immediately that Kai had drawn it. As an artist, you picked up on subtle differences. Everyone had his or her own style.
And as much as he’d hated to admit it, Kai’s was better. “I see what you’re saying.” Tommy studied the strokes and colors. For as good as he was, he was always learning something.
“Don’t use mine. That was an example. Lenny is your client. Redraw it. Show him the new version and see what he says.”
“Why can’t I just use this?”
“Because you can do it. Lenny hired you. He expects your hand to draw.” Kai headed toward the door. “Besides, if you use my art, I get paid and you don’t want to share the money with me.”
Tommy smiled. Kai had a habit of being an asshole, but he’d always been a fair boss. “Thanks.”
Tommy went to the front of the studio and called Lenny to see if they could push his appointment a little later. The promise of new and improved art had Lenny agreeing without needing to be convinced. As Tommy worked on the new art, he wondered where else he’d get as good an education.
He’d spent a couple years at a different studio when he’d first started tattooing, but the boss had been all about just getting clients in and out. Tommy had learned how to be efficient, but he’d felt like his art had suffered. With Kai, the art always came first. He needed to get back into drawing more, to build up his portfolio.
Working intently on the drawing at hand, he lost himself in the ink and colors, finding the same peace he imagined Deirdre found with batter and frosting. He’d never met a woman who understood so easily. Sure, he’d had plenty who were drawn to him because of his tattooing ability, but that was mostly because they thought they’d get free ink.
Deirdre wasn’t like that. She didn’t want to be with him because he played hockey or because he could get her a tattoo. Maybe she was using him for sexual experience, but he’d been used for worse.
And he was pretty sure there was more to it than the possibility of orgasms.
Chapter Ten
Deirdre pulled everything from Aunt Eileen’s cabinets before she started baking. Some of the things she found deep in the corners were downright frightening. Had no one cleaned the cupboards in years? She filled an entire rubbish bin with outdated ingredients and was tying the bag when Aunt Eileen walked in.
“What are you doing now?”
“Clearing out the cupboards of expired food. Then I plan to try some new recipes, but I think a trip to the store is in order first. Do you need anything?”
Eileen narrowed her eyes and stared at Deirdre. “Where were you last night?”
“I went out with Maggie and Shane’s sisters.”
Eileen looked at the clock.
“Then I ate lunch with the O’Malleys. Tommy introduced me to a hamburger cure for a hangover.”
“You’re old enough to know better than to drink so much you need a cure.”
Deirdre hefted the rubbish bag. “You can blame your daughter and her friends. Guinness doesn’t make me sick like their drinks did.”
Eileen stopped her. “There’s good food in there.”
“No, Aunt Eileen, it’s all expired. I’ll replace it with good stuff. You’ll see. Fresh ingredients make a difference. I’ll be back soon.” She carried the bag to the alley and kept walking to the corner to go to the grocery store. She took her time shopping, thinking about the different things she wanted to try.
Throughout her trek, her mind continuously slipped back to Tommy and spending the night with him. The memory of his erection pressing into her back reminded her of giving him a hand job and all of the other things they’d talked about exploring.
When she’d come to him drunk last night wanting to have sex, she really had wanted to. Talking about him to the girls had made her horny, and feeling low and unwanted wasn’t what happened when she was with Tommy. Her timing and approach had been terrible, but even in the sober light of day, she hadn’t changed her mind.
Before heading to the register, she went to the pharmacy side of the store and bought her first pack of condoms. Tommy probably had his own, but she liked the idea of taking ownership of her life.
With all of her purchases squeezed into too many plastic bags, she walked back home. The sun was warm and a hint of spring filled the air. The smell was different from back home, but she had no doubt it was spring calling. Once inside, she called to Eileen.
Eileen came to the kitchen and said, “I’m off to my ladies group from church. I won’t be too late, but don’t hold supper for me.”
“Have fun.”
As Eileen left, Deirdre thought of her own parents, who had so little free time that they rarely saw friends. Oh, they had plenty who visited at the pub all the time, but they had no life away from the pub. They were eager for retirement, and Deirdre couldn’t blame them.
She put away all the groceries and tucked the box of condoms in her purse. Having sex with Tommy couldn’t happen here even though she had plenty of privacy. It would be disrespectful to Aunt Eileen. Tommy had less privacy, especially with Sean around, but his father didn’t appear to care who or what Tommy did.
Thoughts of Tommy’s father reminded her that she’d promised Tommy some diabetic-friendly dessert. Maybe she could do a new version of her lemon cupcakes. She opened the Internet on her phone and looked over some sugar-free recipes to get a general idea and then jumped in.
Having cupcakes gave her a reason to go to Tommy’s. Of course he’d made tentative plans to see her tonight, but she knew that wasn’t likely to happen. Tomorrow, when she got off work, she could take a nap and then spend time with Tommy if he was free. Making plans for herself lit a fire in her chest.
She began measuring ingredients and tasting as she went when her phone rang. It was her mother. Deirdre automatically picked it up, but then hesitated. What if she was calling because Rory had told them? What if they’d fired Rory and now she wanted Deirdre to come home immediately? Hadn’t Brendan said how much Rory was doing in her place?
The fear had her dropping the phone. Knowing her mother, she wouldn’t leave a message. She hated the phone to begin with, so she kept it to a minimum. Deirdre would just be expected to call her back. To remove the temptation to answer, she powered the phone off and tucked it in her purse. Then she returned to her cake batter.
For hours, she baked. Evidence of the new recipes was splattered on Norah’s shirt. The sun had set long ago and Aunt Eileen had come in, looked around, and shook her head. Deirdre began cleaning up with the notion that tomorrow morning would be a bear because she was getting to bed so late.
A knock at the back door startled her so much she nearly dropped the mixing bowl she held. She peered through the window and saw Tommy standing on the porch.
Opening the door, she asked, “What are you doing here?”
“You told me to call, but you didn’t answer.”
“What if I was in bed
?”
“I saw the light on. And your phone went straight to voice mail, not that I could leave a message because your box is full.”
Oh, no. Her voice mail was never full. Not a good sign.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“Liar,” he said and pushed his way into the kitchen. “You went from looking surprised to see me to miserable in a heartbeat.”
She shook her head. “It’s not you. I turned my phone off to avoid the ruckus I’m sure Rory is making back home. I’ve been so busy, I forgot to go back and turn it on.”
“I’m glad you’re still awake.” He advanced again, right into her space.
She put her free hand on his chest. “I’m going to bed as soon as I clean up.”
“I think you can spare a few minutes to kiss me.” He took the bowl from her hand and set it in the sink. “I’ll help with the dishes.”
He pulled her close and kissed her senseless, making her forget about her phone and Rory and her family. In the moment, there was only Tommy and Deirdre sharing a hot kiss. Her entire body warmed and relaxed. Desire tugged at her, so she molded her body more closely to his. They fit so well together.
When he released her, Tommy was panting and she wasn’t faring much better. “Now, I’m really glad I took a chance and came over.”
“So am I. But I do need to get to bed. I’ve only a few hours until I have to go to work.”
He slapped her bum and said, “Then stop slacking and get the dishes done.” They stood side by side at the sink, and Tommy told her about his night at work and the difficult tattoo he’d done. She enjoyed hearing about his day. It was refreshing because with Rory there had been little to talk about when it came to work since they’d both spent so much time at the pub. Just one more way their relationship couldn’t blossom.
“I have hockey practice tomorrow night. Will you come to watch?”
“Practice?”
“Not as much fun as a game, but we still go out for drinks after.”
“If I take a nap after work, maybe.”
“You’re like a little old lady. I think your aunt has a busier social life than you do.”
Through Your Eyes Page 13