First, though, she had a matter of greater importance to attend to. Lacey turned to Will. “And you I’d like to see immediately over at the tack and feed.”
He batted not an eye at her imperious tone but nodded curtly. “Lead the way.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
WILL FOLLOWED LACEY to the back of the deserted store. If someone was of a mind to loot the whole town, he could carry it off blindfolded. Will would bet cash money that every man, woman, child and animal in Abysmal was out on Main Street right now.
What a scene that’d been! He almost wished for the anonymity of Dallas or Houston or San Antonio, where he could get away for a while from people who knew him and everything about him down to the size of his jeans.
Where he could get away from himself.
It wasn’t because Lacey had had to admit in front of the whole town they weren’t getting married, even though the scene had been more than a little reminiscent of Lee’s forced announcement about him and Lacey over eight years ago. And so what if he had handed Laslo the perfect opening, practically gift wrapped, for such an admission. That wasn’t what bothered Will. No, it was the fact that everything he’d worked for and achieved over the past twenty years, everything he was, seemed all for naught, because he knew he couldn’t offer Lacey such means as Laslo of furthering this cause so close to her heart. Not here in Abysmal.
She sure hadn’t understated the extent of the count’s obsessiveness. The man was a certifiable piece of work. And he didn’t know the definition of quit. He obviously considered Lacey his rightful property, to do with as he wished, and he wasn’t going to give up until he had her trapped in his hand like a bird...where he’d crush her, once and for all.
The thought of Laslo having the slightest chance of getting to her made Will sick to his stomach.
Oh, he knew she wanted nothing more than to be free of the count—but Laslo had held out to her a mighty tempting morsel in that foundation. Will could see how the prospect excited her. It was everything she wanted and dreamed of. And given that, he knew there was a real danger of her taking Laslo up on his proposal, even if it put her within range of his influence again. Knowing Lacey, with her restored confidence and strengthened sense of purpose—not to mention her passion for her cause—she just might consider it worth having to deal with Laslo again to get the chance to help hundreds of young women around the country.
He had to hand it to the guy. It was a masterful scheme.
So what could he come up with to make the difference and get Lacey to stay? Will wondered. From the look on her face, she hadn’t been impressed with his own offer.
They reached Lee’s office, where Will closed the door behind him, even though there seemed little chance of them being overheard. Lacey marched to the middle of the floor and whirled on him.
“How could you, Will?” she asked. “How could you even begin to think making your offer would help my situation with Nicolai? You had no call to, and you know it! And how could you let him provoke you? You made it look exactly as Nicolai wanted it to, like you’re some kind of Daddy Warbucks who thinks he knows better than Orphan Annie what’s best for her, or worse, like you’re some almighty cattle baron who uses whatever brute force necessary to defend his territory—including his woman!”
“And what rancher wouldn’t defend all he held dear when he’s got a pack of murderin’ outlaws at the door!” Will retorted.
She stalked forward a few steps, indignation radiating from her like heat from a fire. “How many times must I say it? I do not need a man to rescue me, I am not a possession to be wrestled over, and I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions about my life, thank you very much! I thought, of everyone, you understood that about me and what I need from you!”
“I wasn’t trying to possess you or control you or rescue you!” Will countered. He flung up a hand. “All right, so maybe I got my dander up and got carried away. Believe me, I’m not too happy with myself for gettin’ out of control like that. But I am what I am, Lacey! A take-charge, fix-it kind of man, and while I’m learning how to stand back and let people live their lives, I ask you what was I supposed to do when Laslo started weavin’ that web of his? It wasn’t just you he was after, it was me and the whole town!”
She pointed to her chest. “But it’s me he wants, and he’ll use anyone or anything I care about to get to me—Jenna, my parents, my center and yes, you! And if you had let me handle the situation for once, I might’ve had a chance at saving us all a whole lot of trouble!”
“For once?” he echoed incredulously. “Don’t tell me I’ve got the way of things between us wrong, because up to now you’ve been pretty willing to take full advantage of my offers of help, including helpin’ you get over your divorce by lettin’ you work out all manner of doubts and worries and fears with me as your testing ground.”
He spread his arms as if tendering himself as a stud for hire. “But you know us Proffitts—we don’t seem to have the sense of a jackrabbit when it comes to Lacey McCoy!”
Her green eyes darkened to emerald. “Don’t you dare insinuate I’ve ever used you or Lee!”
“Then don’t you go and make it sound like I’m the domineering, interfering ring-tailed control freak in this little drama, ’cause we all know Laslo’s got that part sewed up tight!”
You could have clothespinned laundry to the stare that hung between them.
Will looked away first, wondering at the desperateness that made his hand shake as he ran it over his face. “Look, Lacey. You’ve got to see you can’t take one step in Laslo’s direction.”
“I beg your—”
“I know helping girls all over the country means a lot to you, but it won’t do them or you any good if givin’ them a chance means havin’ anything to do with the man who near to destroyed your life.”
Lacey crossed her arms. “Well, at least we agree on one thing.”
His shoulders sagged in relief. “So you’re not going to take Laslo up on his offer? I mean, it’s not like you’d be givin’ up on your dream altogether. I meant what I said. You’d have no worries about your center in town makin’ it.”
She merely looked at him sadly, though he couldn’t fathom why. He only had a sense of having failed her somehow.
That desperateness mounted in him again. He felt he had to do something pretty quick, but he didn’t know what on earth that could be.
“Lacey—” Will stopped, dropped his chin, hands on his hips, and cleared his throat before trying again. “Lacey, you’ve got to know I’m not tryin’ to control you if I’m sayin’ this, but I feel like I’m losing you and I don’t know what to do about it. Maybe you can help me, even if I can’t help you. Just tell me what you need from me, and I swear I’ll do it.”
“Will...don’t you see it’s not about that?” she said wearily, as if she were tired of trying to make him understand.
Which caused him to say in complete frustration, “Call me dense, but no, I don’t see much of anything at this point!”
Lips compressed, Lacey hugged herself and turned to stare out the window, not responding. She looked so forsaken and forlorn, like she’d just lost her best friend.
He couldn’t stand it. Will came up behind her, hesitated, then rested his hands on her shoulders. “Will you at least give me a chance at understanding?” he asked.
Lacey gave a choked cry, turning into his arms and hugging him fiercely, as if for the last time. He held on to her as tightly, cheek pressed to the top of her head. She was so dear to him he could barely comprehend it.
Before he knew it, she let him go and stepped back.
Shoulders back, head held high and looking more like a princess than she ever had, she stood before him.
“It’s not that I don’t appreciate your help and support, Will,” she said. “Because I do. It’s mean
t so much to me over the past months. But what I want...need more than someone to step in and solve my problems or bear my burdens, is someone with the trust in me and trust in himself to support me through my making my own choices—and mistakes, too—as I go about this lifelong process of becoming me.”
An uncanny sense of déjà vu hit him as the finality of her words rang in his head. I need more than you can give me, Will Proffitt.
“What’re you sayin’, Lacey?” he whispered, prepared for the worst.
She glanced down, seeming to concentrate on her hands clasped before her. “What I’m saying is I won’t settle for anything less for myself than that sort of complete honesty and trust between me and the man I love.”
Will rocked back on his heels. He hadn’t been expecting that. Had she just said she loved him?
With her eyes downcast and her hands folded before her, she looked the very picture of a martyr at the stake, radiating strength and conviction—while still being completely and utterly vulnerable.
That combination, which to him characterized Lacey McCoy as nothing else could, was something to behold, bringing a lump to his throat the size of Amarillo. Because it was the very essence of a woman in love. Will didn’t have to ask to know it as he would his own name.
And, as surely, he knew he loved her, too, in a way he had never believed himself capable—with that total and utter vulnerability.
The words sprang to his lips to tell her he loved her so, but Will stopped himself at the last second. Not that he wouldn’t mean it. Not that he couldn’t risk it. It was simply some instinct in him that told him words weren’t what Lacey needed from him right now. Which frustrated him, because she’d pretty much forbidden him from doing anything to demonstrate he loved her.
Except this: in one fluid motion, he reached out, snagged her around the waist, and dragged her against him. Their mouths found each other unerringly, and Will held nothing back as he kissed Lacey.
But she deserved better. She deserved complete honesty and truth from him.
So for once it was Will who pulled back first, setting Lacey away from him with a wrenching groan.
She said nothing, her face a one-minute instruction in trepidation. He hated that he was even part of the cause of such fear in her! He would have done anything to take it away from her, even if it meant taking it upon himself.
But life didn’t work that way, for anyone. Neither did love. Well, if this was what being in love was like, he’d just as soon live without it!
Except, hurt and aching and fearful himself, he’d tried that once, and it hadn’t worked.
“So where does this leave us—again?” Lacey asked at last.
“Right where you want to be, is what I’m thinkin’,” he said without an ounce of sympathy for either of them. “It’s up to you now, Lacey. You wanted choices, you’ve got ’em. You’ve just got to figure out behind which door lies the tiger.”
Her eyes widened as his words sank in. Pale and wan, Lacey nodded. “As always, I’m thankful for your directness, Will. Now if you’ll excuse me, it appears I’ve got some thinking to do.”
He had to cram his fingers into his pockets to keep from reaching for her again as she brushed past him on her way out the door.
It was the single hardest thing he’d ever done in his life, letting her go.
* * *
LACEY KEPT HER EYES STRAIGHT ahead as her father drove the length of Main Street. It was lined with faces, most of them belonging to people she had known all her life. They were faces as familiar to her as her own. She had grown up here. She was one of them. She needed to remember that.
That they would understand.
“You sure you want to go through with this, darlin’?” her father asked, throwing her a worried glance.
“Yes.”
Her mother, sitting on her other side, gave her hand a squeeze. “You’ve said barely a word since last night, Lacey.”
“I’ve been thinking of what I’m going to say.”
“You don’t have to tell people anything, you know. You’ve got the public sympathy, hands down. Why, the calls just keep pourin’ in from people pledgin’ thousands and thousands of dollars to your center, whether it’s here in Abysmal or New York City.”
“And I’m thankful for that support, Mom, I really am. But I still have to tell them the truth, to make them understand.” She clasped her mother’s hand tightly to keep hers from shaking. She wasn’t afraid so much as nervous. She wanted badly to do the right thing. “I—I don’t see how I can do anything else and still live with myself.”
She saw her parents exchange worried looks between them, but they said no more, and she blessed them for their silent support. It was exactly what she needed. Exactly.
They reached the spot on Main Street where, like royalty, she had bid the townspeople all convene in order to hear her words. And like faithful subjects, she saw as she climbed out of the pickup after her mother, they had come as directed. So had the media, even more than yesterday. Nicolai’s limousine was parked along the curb, but he was nowhere in sight. Of course, he wouldn’t appear until the moment was right. And this moment, for as long as it lasted, was hers.
Yes, Lacey thought, her notoriety as America’s Cinderella was good for something.
She was further heartened, as she moved toward the spot where a phalanx of microphones had been set up, to hear murmurs of “We’re with you, Lacey,” and “You jest stand up for yourself, girl,” coming from the crowd.
Then Jenna appeared and grasped Lacey’s forearm. “Lacey, I had to see you before you got up in front of everyone.”
The girl was dressed, Lacey was interested to note, in her old blue jeans and scuffed-up ropers. Of course, so was she.
Jenna caught the direction of her glance and gave an embarrassed laugh. “Those fancy clothes are great for grand entrances, but after I spilled chili down the front of that yellow suit, I decided since I’m stayin’ in Abysmal, I’m better off dressing a mite more practical.”
“You’re staying—for good?” Lacey asked, and Jenna nodded. “But you seemed so excited yesterday by Nicolai’s sponsorship of your education.”
The girl turned even pinker as, thumbs hooked in her belt loops, she dug her heel into the soft dirt, idly rocking her boot back and forth. “Oh, I don’t think it was that as much as bein’ dazzled by the thought of comin’ back with my head held high.”
“It’s a great opportunity,” Lacey said with a catch in her throat. “One that no one else will be able to give you.”
“I know. But I had a good long talk with Daddy last night. He wants what’s best for me, and what I could see, after the way Nicolai acted yesterday, was that it wasn’t gonna do me any good to take favors from him.”
She looked at Lacey with one of those precociously wise looks. “I mean, everyone can use a little support and help. But I kept thinkin’ about walking around on that college campus and how I wouldn’t feel I belonged there. Not ’cause I was from little ol’ Abysmal, Texas,” she said hastily, anticipating Lacey’s comment. “But because I wouldn’t have gotten there on account of my grades or my test scores or any of my other talents.”
She turned back into a teenaged girl again as she looked up shyly from beneath her lashes. “So if you’ll let me, I’d like to keep helpin’ you with your girls’ center while I’m busy applyin’ for colleges to go to.”
Lacey folded her into a tight hug, so proud she could burst. “Believe me, I couldn’t do it without you, Jenna.” In so many ways. Her conviction about what she must do today was strengthened tenfold.
“So I guess the main thing I’m tryin’ to say is, do what’s right for you, too, Lacey,” Jenna said, cheek pressed to hers. “Don’t worry about me. I’m going to make it one way or another. Just you watch me!”
“I wo
uldn’t miss it for the world,” Lacey whispered.
“Lacey.”
She let Jenna go to look up into Lee Proffitt’s friendly eyes. “Hello, Lee.”
He cocked his head to the side. “Take a walk with me?”
They strolled away from the milling people for a moment of relative privacy.
“Quite a crowd here today, isn’t it?” Lee remarked.
“Yes.” A quiver of nervousness vibrated through her, which Lacey countered by observing wryly, “I hope to give them the kind of scene they’ve come to expect whenever I’m going through a personal crisis.”
Lee’s smile was sympathetic. “That’s sort of what I wanted to talk to you about. Y’see, Will spent half of last night goin’ around to people’s houses, explaining what this girls’ center was about and what it’d mean to the girls in this area, and asking them to show their support for it—and you.”
Her jaw dropped. “He did?”
“Yup. And lookie here.” He took an envelope out of his back pocket. “It’s donations for your center. It’s not that people haven’t wanted to give before, but now that they know a little bit more of what you’re tryin’ to do, they think it’s a bang-up idea.”
He handed her the envelope with a nod. “You’ll find just over five thousand dollars in checks in there, with more to come should you need it—you know, if you decide to stay in Abysmal.”
Lacey’s eyes swam with tears as she held the fat envelope in her hand. Five thousand dollars! It was far from a million, far from the thousands upon thousands pledged from around the country, but more precious to her than all that money put together. “Th-thank you, Lee.”
“We aren’t a bunch of ignorant bumpkins, y’know. We could see what the count was doing, tryin’ to tarnish you and Will and the rest of us. It did the town a powerful lot of good to see Will in a different light yesterday, shed of his usual iron-clad ways. And he pretty much called it like it was with Laslo, earnin’ himself a lot of respect for that. Real respect—and not fear.”
Countess in Cowboy Boots Page 20