by J. J. Jones
Once I had repeated the instructions again he hugged me close to him. “Tanisha, you must do this for me, okay. This is the most important thing of everything I have asked of you. No matter what happens today, no matter what you see, you must go see Jose at that address. Even if I don’t make it, still go see him.”
“What do you mean, if you don’t make it?” I asked upset.
“There is always that possibility, Tanisha, it has always been there, through this whole process, in everything that we have done. I have always ran the risk of getting caught somewhere in the process, and I’m not out of the woods yet either. Each step I take, I get closer, but I’m not there yet.” He explained.
“Okay, I understand,” I said still a little upset.
“Promise me,” he said.
“Yes, I promise, I will go see this man, even if you don’t make it,” I replied, and as I finished speaking we could hear faint sirens approaching.
“I have to go,” Logan said.
“Snowflake, we need to be going,” the pilot called to Logan.
“I know,” I replied tears forming in my eyes.
Logan bent down and kissed me one last time. The taste of his lips lingered on mine long after he was gone. I watched him turn and board the airplane. Our eyes locked and I let the tears roll down my cheeks as he raised his hand waving goodbye, as I had to back away from the plane when the pilot roared the engines to life.
I ran to my car and pulled away from the airfield. I stopped to watch as their plane turned onto the runway and pulled into the air. I didn’t stop the tears from falling freely down my face. I turned the car away from the airfield and began to drive down the frontage road. I could see Logan’s plane from my rear view mirror. I continued to watch him intently as I drove, knowing this would probably be the last I would ever see of my lover.
Then I heard the sound of two fighter jets before I saw them. They have a sound that is completely unmistakable if you’ve ever lived near an air force base, as if the world is ending. I looked up and saw the two f-16s coming in front of me. They approached quickly and flew right over the top of me. After they had passed over me, I watched in my rear view mirror as they approached Logan’s plane. For a brief moment, I thought they both were going to crash right into it. Then at what seemed like the last possible second, they both veered in opposite directions and looped back toward me.
I immediately pulled my car off to the side of the road and watched the scene unfold from my car window. Logan’s plane continued to fly straight for the border. It didn’t move, veer or divert in any way. I watched in horror as the fighter jets looped back around and came back in behind Logan’s plane.
“No!” I screamed. “They are coming for you!” I scrambled to think of something I could do, but I knew that my efforts were pointless.
Each fighter jet shot a missile at Logan’s plane before diverting and flying away from the scene. The missiles were targeting Logan’s plane to specifically bring it down. The pilot didn’t even have a chance to maneuver his way away from the missiles; there was nothing he could do. They were homing missiles, targeted for Logan’s plane. There was no way to avoid them once they had been fired.
The first missile hit the plane’s right wing, sending the plane on a downward spiral. That missile alone would have caused the plane to crash with no survivors, but the fighter jets were going to make certain they did their job thoroughly. The second missile struck the belly of the plane, spreading smoke and fire through the entire plane including the cabin and cockpit where Logan and the pilot were sitting.
Within seconds the plane struck the ground like a ball of fire and smoke. The sound was deafening even from where I was parked watching. At first the scene completely captivated me; that what I had seen had happened in real life, and I wasn’t watching a movie. It was overwhelming. I sat awestruck for a time, before realizing that it was real and that the people in those dancing flames were real people, and one of them was Logan, someone that I loved.
I grabbed at my door handle and started to jump out of my car to run to him. I only made it a few feet before collapsing on the ground sobbing. No one could have survived a crash like that. There was no point in running to the crash to see his mangled burnt body. My body heaved in agony and pain. I felt broken and alone.
I had finally found someone that I trusted, that I loved. I had fallen for him, loved him, and now lost him all in such a short space of time. And now I wouldn’t even have the dream of him, the idea of him anymore. He would be gone forever, lost to the woes of the death, too young because a government was too afraid to learn, too afraid to understand and too afraid of the unknown.
Chapter7
I was so broken that I couldn’t even cry. I wanted the tears to come, but nothing came. I tried to feel pain or anger, but suddenly, I felt empty. I felt nothing. It was a new sensation for me. I wanted nothing else than to curl up into a ball and lie there in the dirt until someone or something came for me.
I don’t know how long I sat there on my knees, but eventually, the sound of sirens, awakened my senses. I knew that I couldn’t be found near the scene of Logan’s accident, if you could call it an accident. But regardless, I knew I needed to get away. I had to start driving somewhere. I feel numb everywhere. I got back in my car, and turned the ignition and started to drive. As I drove the tears finally started to fall. Crying soon turned to sobbing, and eventually I had to pull the car over again because I couldn’t see the road clearly. I could still see the plume of smoke from the plane crash in my rear view mirror.
I crawled into my backseat and curled into a ball and cried until I had no more tears to cry. I was laying on the back seat of the car, when I felt something poking into my thigh from my pocket. I reached into my front pocket and pulled out the small piece of cardboard that Logan had given me earlier with the address he had given me. Just looking at the address made me start crying all over again. I stroked the letters he had written, thinking about his hands writing the letters and the last time we had spoken with each other.
But then I remembered the promise I had made to him. No matter what happens … I had promised him that I would go the address even if he didn’t make it. I stared at the address for a long time wondering what this man Jose would have for me from Logan. I hoped it wasn’t money. The last thing I wanted was more of Logan’s money.
I realized now that by going to see Jose, I was fulfilling Logan’s final wish. He had asked me to do this for him, and now that he was dead, this was the last thing I could do for him. This was the way I could honor him and his life. I needed to do this for him.
I had a renewed conviction as I moved from the backseat to the front again. I no longer was feeling sorry for myself or my situation. Instead, I wanted to do something to honor Logan and his memory. And I wanted to start by fulfilling his final wish, his dying wish. I would go and see this man, Jose, and see what it was that he had for me, and then depending on what it was, then I would find a way to honor Logan’s memory for the rest of the world to see.
I started my car, wiped the tears from eyes and looked in the mirror. I looked like a complete disaster. My eyes were puffy and red and my face was all blotchy. I decided to take a minute to clean myself up before driving the rest of the way to see Jose. I didn’t feel like I was in a complete hurry anyway, so I grabbed my purse, where I had some emergency make-up stashed and cleaned myself up as best I could with what I had. I also tried to smooth out my hair and make myself look presentable.
I definitely didn’t feel like a supermodel, but I felt much better after I had worked myself over. I started my drive feeling refreshed and renewed. I still felt a measure of loss and pain in my heart, but I also feel strength and love for the time I had spent with Logan.
I put the address from the piece of cardboard into my phone and the GPS told me I had a little less than an hour to drive. I didn’t mind. The drive would be nice to clear my head and calm myself down from all the excitement and adrenaline
of the last two days.
I needed a little “me” time anyway, and an hour seemed just about right. As I drove, I thought about all the wonderful things I could do with the money Logan had given me in order to honor his memory. I thought about setting up different foundations or scholarships in his name. How would the government feel about that? Would they shut me down? Or come in and make me stop if they knew I was setting it up under him? I didn’t know, but I wanted to try. I could also use a pseudonym like “snowflake” to set it up, so I wouldn’t have the problem in the first place.
I worried for a moment that money I had was tracked or something and if I used it, it would be seized. But then I thought that Logan was too smart for that. He thought of everything – except his plane being shot down at the border. Maybe that was my fault though? If I had not slowed him down with my goodbye he might have gotten away quicker.
I almost started crying again, but I forced myself to think of better things and better times in order to keep it together. I wondered what kind of scholarship or foundation I should set up. I really wanted to find others like Logan and help them, but I didn’t think that was really a possibility.
Logan would be proud about that, I thought. After continuing to brainstorm for awhile about a few other ideas, my GPS told me some directions and I arrived at the marina and the address Logan had given me.
The address was a harbor, and I could see a myriad of boats tied to several docks floating in the water. I parked my car in what seemed to be the best possible spot to park and walked over to the boathouse. The area smelled of fish and saltwater. I almost wanted to hold my nose, but I figured that would be rude, so I refrained even though I was really grossed out by the place.
Everything seemed really quiet and a little eerie. I wondered why Logan had sent me to what seemed like a kind of shady place. I didn’t feel as safe as I would have liked as I walked to the boathouse, even though there didn’t seem to be anyone around. I felt as if people were staring at me, even though I couldn’t see anyone else.
I knocked on the door to the boathouse, feeling extremely timid.
A small Hispanic man wearing a pair of big overalls a very dirty undershirt and a pair of black galoshes opened the door.
“Hi, I’m looking for …” I didn’t get to finish my sentence.
“Tanisha, you must be Tanisha,” he said.
“Uh, yes. I’m looking for Jose?” I said.
“Yep, that’s me,” the man replied. “I’d offer to shake your hand, but mine are rather dirty, and yours look awfully clean. Plus you’d probably prefer yours didn’t smell like fish for the rest of the week,” he leaned in to tell me the latter part as if it were a secret.
I laughed a little uncomfortably wondering what in the hell Logan had sent me to this place for.
“But come on with me. You’re not here to shoot the shit with me,” he motioned for me to follow him.
“Alright,” I said completely confused, but having no other choice than to follow him.
We walked out of the boathouse and down the dock. We walked past a few different boats, some were small fishing boats, while others were more like speed boats. I assumed that Jose owned one of the fishing boats, considering his hands smelled like fish. But maybe he also managed all the boats and the docks around here.
I still was trying to figure out what Logan would have for me here. A boat perhaps? But what the hell was I going to do with a boat? I sure as hell didn’t want one. I’d never driven a boat in my life, and I really didn’t want to start now, so I really was hoping that he wasn’t gifting me a boat.
Jose lead me further down the dock to what looked like a yacht compared to the other boats in the area. It wasn’t really, but it was the nicest boat docked there.
“Go ahead, Tanisha,” Jose said.
I must have looked extremely confused, because he continued.
“Just go on aboard, you’ll understand once you are on the deck,” Jose encouraged.
I was full of questions, but I didn’t ask any, hoping that they would all be answered once I was on board. I walked out on a small plank that allowed me to board the boat. As I stepped onto the boat, I felt it rocking back and forth. It was a peaceful feeling.
I stepped around the boat, walking freely, looking for something or someone to explain what exactly was going on. I walked toward the bow of the boat and a familiar scent grazed my nose. I stopped suddenly mid-step. I knew that scent. Only one person in the world had that scent.
Chapter8
“Logan?” I asked tentatively afraid to move.
Logan moved into full view at the bow of the boat. I couldn’t move my body. I couldn’t believe my eyes as he stood there smiling without a scratch on him. He started to move toward me, his arms reached out to me and engulfed me in a huge bear hug.
I let myself relax into him, trying to breathe and calm myself down. I knew that I couldn’t explain anything that had happened, but there would be time for explanations. For right now, I would just enjoy the feeling of being in his arms again, a feeling that I was sure I would never feel again.
After minutes of laying my head against his chest and hearing his heart beat, he reluctantly pulled me away from him.
“Wow, I thought you would never come. I’m sorry,” he said. “I know that you must have been through hell the last few hours. Let’s sit down and we’ll talk.”
We went to the front of the boat where there was bench and sat together to talk about everything. I still couldn’t find my voice, so I mainly listened.
“Okay, so everything up until the airplane you know about. But that’s when the plan changed. I wanted the FBI to think I was hopping the border. I wanted them to assume I was taking that plane out the country in order to throw them off my track. After the plane took off we both jumped out, I left in a separate car and headed for the dock and came directly here in this boat instead.”
He paused and waited for me to say something, but I stayed quiet so he continued.
“I watched as the plane took off and headed to Mexico as planned. I didn’t expect the attack from the fighter jets. Now the FBI and others think I died in the crash. So no one will expect me to still be alive at least for awhile. You and I can have some time together, which will be nice. Eventually, I’m sure they’ll figure out their mistake, but at least we’ll have some time before they figure it out.”
Finally I regain my composure a little and feel like I can take everything in. “And you couldn’t have informed me of your little get away plan?”
“That’s why I’m so sorry, Tanisha. I had to be extremely cautious. What if you were taken by the FBI before I could re-connect with you? I just had to be sure that everything went according to planned. And everything worked out okay in the end right?”
“Sure, but Logan I thought you were dead!” I stood up exasperated. “I watched your plane get shot down by two fighter jets. It was one of the worst things I have ever experienced in my entire life. In fact it’s probably the worst things I’ve ever experienced in my entire life.” I turned at looked at him partially angry but also partially in love.
“I know,” Logan said hanging his head.
“I have cried more tears in the last few hours than I have ever cried in my entire life. I can’t even begin to explain to you how hard it was for me to watch you die in that plane crash only to then find out that you were really alive.”
“I’m sorry,” Logan said.
“This has been quite the emotional roller coaster,” I said. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled that you’re alive, I’m just trying to take everything in okay?”
“Come here, let me hold you,” Logan held out his arms and without questioning I went to him and let him hold me until I calmed down.
He kissed my head and held me tight, which brought more tears. Tears of joy mixed with tears of anger. I think I even threw a few playful punches at him to help relieve a little of my anger.
“I had to bring you along once I
realized the truth. The truth is I love you, Tanisha,” Logan said gently lifting my face toward his.
“I love you, too Logan,” I said looking back at him.
He brought my face close to his and kissed me passionately. This kiss had more meaning behind it than all the words that had been spoken between us thus far. We had been through so much together and sealing it with a passionate kiss, only told me that this was not the end of our relationship together, but the beginning of something far more special.
Holding me tightly from behind, Logan showed me how to drive the boat. “Your car will easily be flagged now, by the police and FBI. I’ll have Jose take care of it for you. We’ll get you something else to drive, but in the mean time, I have access to something else when we get back to the mainland.”
“Okay,” I said completely trusting everything Logan had planned from now on. “Sounds perfect to me.”
Epilogue
“I think you’re getting the hang of it,” Logan said as he taught me how to drive the boat.
“It’s not nearly as intimidating as I thought it would be,” I admitted.
“Driving one in the open water isn’t really all that tough,” he explained. “It’s driving one onto and off a trailer that’s difficult, or in and out of the dock. Then things get a little tricky. It’s not like driving a car, because you don’t have a brake.”
“Oh, yeah,” I said thinking more about it, “that could make things complicated I said. I guess when we get close to where ever we are going, I’ll hand you the wheel,” I said. “Or whatever you call this thing.” I laughed.
Logan laughed, too.
“It’s nice to be less stressed about things,” Logan said. “I feel so much more relaxed.” He kicked his feet up and put his hands up behind his head.
“I’m glad you feel that way,” I said. “I’m sure it’s been a long time since you’ve felt this way.”