by KT Morrison
“Don’t laugh,” she giggled.
“You’re so cute.”
“Thank you. I’m thinking this shaving thing is going to be a lot of work.”
“Probably,” he said.
“I think you should shave yours too. Even out the discomfort.”
“I wouldn’t look good shaved.”
“You’re lucky I’m anxious to get out of here, or I’d hold you down and shave that little pecker.”
He grabbed her, and squeezed her, said, “You and what army?”
She wriggled in his grip and she whispered, “Maybe my boyfriend will hold you down and I’ll shave your little dick.”
“Don’t,” he said, “God, Maggie...”
She turned her worried face to him, cooed, “Sorry, Max, sorry...”
“No...well, no, I’m getting hard again.”
She laughed and squirmed free now. She got under the spray again, let it hit her neck and she said, “That’s okay? I’m joking...”
“It’s okay, Maggie,” he said.
“Wow, you are getting hard. Soap up, Max. Let’s go back...ah, shoot... Jessie. Can we got to your room?”
He stepped next to her and soaped himself. “Yeah. Hey, did you really see him hard?” Wondering how much she wanted to reveal.
“Oh,” she said, lowering her eyes. “Yeah, he was hard.”
“It’s okay,” he said.
“Sorry, I was...I didn’t know how to tell you.”
“You didn’t touch him?”
“No, Max. No.”
Liar.
“Okay. It’s silly to worry about it now. Considering tomorrow...”
Her eyebrows went glum, she said, “Max, I’m not going to...I can’t do it...”
“We’ll see,” he said, turning his chin to the spray. “We’ll see.”
Part Three
Chapter Ten
Turpentine
Thursday, September 21st
Passing through the Oren Glen he found Cole on his own, sitting on the raised concrete edge of the circular garden. Another warm day, three in a row now, and campus was crawling with students dressed like it was summer. Cole had cargo shorts and flip-flops, a Rangers sweatshirt that some of the players wore and a baseball hat pulled low; his face was hidden under the peak, his fingers texting away.
Max threw his bag over his shoulder and crossed behind the circular planter as big as a swimming pool, hopped up onto it and sneaked across, winding around its edge clockwise, not making a sound until he came up behind Cole. He slipped his finger into his mouth then ran it over the top edge of Cole’s ear poking out next to his cap.
“Shit,” Cole yelled, and Max jumped down on his other side and pulled up his fly, like he was putting his cock away.
Cole laughed said, “You’re a fucking idiot.”
They sat down again together and Max said, “Sorry about the other night, man. We bailed on you...”
“It’s all right,” he said. “Went on Pussy Patrol...”
“That redhead?”
He leaned to Max, shielded his phone from the sun and scrolled his thumb through text messages. “Here,” he said, and stopped and showed him a blurry selfie of the red-headed girl from Altieri’s. She was topless, taking a picture of herself, smiling, pretty and fresh, laying flat in her dorm room bed with the tops of her rosy nipples visible. “And,” he said, and scrolled again, showed him another. The sweet nip slip of the first picture miles distant of this one. Her own hand, close up, her fingers pulling between her legs, showing Cole her salmon pink sex.
“Oh fuck,” Max laughed, and Cole whisked the phone away, looking at it for himself now.
“She was a screamer, Max.”
“Yeah?”
“Holy shit. She was wild.”
“Freshman?”
“Yeah. Went to her dorm. I can’t even say...”
“She’s hot.”
“Fuck, yeah,” he said and slid his phone into a pocket in his shorts.
“She a little young?”
He sighed, looking out through the wooded glen. “Feels like we were Freshmen yesterday.”
“I know. It does. Hey,” he said then, punched his knee, “You’re going to make it next weekend?”
Cole turned and looked at him seriously, “Of course, Max. Yeah, I can’t wait.” Max and Maggie had to drive down to Jamestown and meet Maggie’s parents. Wedding stuff. They had to go and look at the church, the venue for the reception...and Maggie’s mother, who scared the shit out of him, asked to meet the Best Man.
“That’s a relief.”
Cole said, “So hey man, what was with that thing the other day?”
“With Maggie?”
“Yeah. You guys okay?”
“We’re fine. Just a momentary…thing.”
“Made me feel really weird.”
Max turned, saw he wasn’t joking. “Sorry, bro. I told you it wasn’t you...”
“Like, Maggie? ...seriously, like, me and Maggie?”
“I know, I know...”
“She’s, like, ...I love her like a sister. She’s going to be your wife. I’m your Best Man.”
“I know. I know.”
“That’s gross. We were just horsing around.”
“I know,” he yelled, laughing.
“She’s hot as fuck, but really?”
Max hung his head, said, “I’m not normally jealous...you know...something made me jealous. Not you.”
“What happened?”
“Nothing. Just...nah, it’s nothing. It’s over now. I’m so overworked, getting stressed. Final year, wedding...it’s a lot. Then one little weird thing and I blew it up...”
“You sure you guys are okay?”
Max breathed out. This afternoon would tell, wouldn’t it?
“Yeah, Cole. We’re going to be fine.”
She painted to distract herself. Not in-class time, just took advantage of a free studio block and came down to the Fine Arts Hall and set up an easel and went to work. She had an hour to kill. An hour spent in her room would have killed her. She would have run out of there like it was haunted. All the ghosts of Christmas Future coming to her, telling her harrowing tales of how it would be if she went through with what Max wanted ...And she wanted.
Sleep with another guy? Max was definite. He didn’t seem to waver, though he did seem challenged by jealousy and hurt. This couldn't be a good idea, could it? Sleeping with Jay Carmichael would be wild. Now that Max had seemingly talked her into it she was excited, but scared. Her brain, the voice in her head, said she wouldn't do it, that when Jay came nothing would happen. Don’t worry. You’ll be too scared. Something primal inside her said, We’ll have to see, won’t we? That thing inside her, if given a grip, would take over and let it happen. Wanted it to happen. There was a girl inside her who was dying to spread her legs for a man like Jay.
“Oh boy,” she sighed, throwing down a splash of cadmium. No pattern today. This was about exploration. She wouldn’t mind seeing the work she might produce when she was in a state like this. In all her twenty-one years she’d never felt like this before. Love, yes, love was there. Love for her Max. Surprise, that was another ingredient. Shock. Shocked that he would ask this of her, that he would want it. A pervasive dread too. The act of having sex with Jay would be an emotional thing. Pleasurable, she imagined, but when it was done, she would have to look in his eyes, have to look in Max’s eyes.
What if Jay didn’t think she was good in bed? What if she was a disappointment? All this talk of Jay and his beautiful body and his big penis, no mention of what she brought to the table. She knew he wanted to have sex with her, but she didn’t have the female equivalent of a big dick and she didn’t have a jaw-dropping body like Jay did. She was thin. Kind of too thin maybe. Her breasts were a bit small. She didn’t have one of those big asses. She was getting more out of this than Jay was.
Her neck went hot at that thought. She clasped her neck in her hands and looked up at the twenty-foo
t ceiling, up into the girders of the Murrayson Fine Arts Hall. Daylight streaming in through those high windows, carefully planned and angled so that natural light would flood this working space.
Her painting was wild, frenetic. Like her thoughts, the canvas was a mess. A bunch of scattered ideas there. And something carnal too. She could see it. See it lurking in her work. Just like Max could see it in her drawings of Jay. Something salacious living underneath it all, breathing dirty life or maybe sizzling electric nastiness. Whatever it was, something told her she was going to do more this afternoon than just watch Jay jerk himself off again.
Maggie walked with a worried gait. Wearing a light top with a low neck, a silky thing made up of lots of small cheerful flowers, she made her way closer, a smile spreading when she saw him. An obviously nervous smile, even from this distance. He watched her thin legs, in oyster cotton pants today, work their way with trepidation.
What lay between those legs, that sacred space hidden behind two layers of thin cotton, soft skin shaved bare now, would be shared. Maybe. She said she wouldn’t. This was just fun she said. We’re pretending.
He was sure Maggie thought she might just touch his cock. Maybe she thought Jay would touch her. Maybe her breasts, maybe more. Maggie didn’t know he’d watched her. She wouldn’t want to know that. She would be mad. She should be mad. But if he told her, despite her anger, she would have to face her shame. Doing what she did without permission. It doesn't matter that permission came now. She didn't have it then.
No, he had a broader scope of her and Jay. She was one side of the duo, concerned with her own feelings. He’d seen it from the outside. Seen her. Seen Jay. Maggie didn't want to face it, but she was more curious than she knew. Or admitted to knowing. She knew...deep down she had to know. Part of her was still resisting. Part of her was still holding on for dear life to the notion that she was a good girl. If he had never intervened he was quite sure that she would have submitted to Jay eventually. Fucked him. Fucked him and ended their relationship. Now Max had control. More control than Jay. Two days ago, Jay was going to win—now Jay was not going to win.
He supposed, between Jay and him, this would be a meeting in the middle. Jay was an unknown. Max could guess though. If Jay saw a crack in his Maggie’s armor he would pummel it. If Maggie thought she was going to just play around with Jay, maybe just play a little game of cop-a-feel, she didn’t know guys. And she didn’t. His Maggie didn't know. One other guy in her life besides Max? Probably some nerd from Music Class in High School, the one she played symphony with. Probably a nice guy. Then, after that, only Max. Her experience was with guys like Max. Nice guys. She didn’t know that a guy like Jay was in this to win. And winning would be planting that manhood up inside his Maggie. He might try a few different ploys to get there, but he would get there.
She waved now, mouthed a nervous, Hi Max!, slung her bag onto his bench and slipped in between it and him, leaned against him heartily.
They didn’t say anything, just leaned on each other and felt their bodies press. Finally, after some tense quiet, he eased back and put his arm around her.
“How are you?” he said.
“I’m okay.”
“Nervous?”
“Yup,” she said.
“You ready?”
“I guess. I showered twice this morning. Do I smell like paint?” She leaned to him and he smelled the top of her head.
“Yes,” he said. “Papaya and turpentine.”
“Shoot,” she whispered.
“Want another shower?”
“With you?”
“We don’t have time,” he laughed.
“No, I don’t care. Should I care?”
“Jay won’t care, Maggie. I swear he won’t.”
“We’re not dating right?”
He shook her with his arm, comforted her. Thought how they should stop. It would be easy to say it was over before it had begun. But he found in his heart he still didn’t want it to be over. He still wanted this. His heart pounded strong beats against his ribs. Even at rest like this on a park bench under the shade of a grand maple he could feel it pound within him. This could be a good plan. This could be an exciting thing. You’d never know til you tried.
They held hands while they walked up the stairs of Keegan and went to her bedroom. Another drawing session scheduled with Jay. Jessie was out. In class. Their new handkerchief ready to hang on the door, should she decide to skip. This was going to happen.
Jay texted, said he was almost on campus. It would just be a matter of minutes. She was shaking. Her insides tight, constringed, heavy. Yet her feet felt light, her body felt weightless.
“I’m not going to have sex with him, you know?” she said to Max as they paused at their dorm room door, her hand poised on the lever.
He smiled and he kissed her, acting a little condescending. Like he knew she would. She wasn’t going to have sex with him. She might touch him a little. And she didn't like to think of the reality of it, but if he touched her she would like that as well. She wouldn't ask though. She would touch him. She would do that. She’d like to get a feel of his hardness. His body, that is. Maybe she might be convinced to hold his penis today. If he got hard. She imagined he would get hard. Especially if she was touching him. Hoo. But she wasn't going to have sex with him.
“Let’s go,” Max said, and he put his hand over hers on the lever and got her to open the door.
They went in, closed it behind them and she kissed him again.
“Are you excited?” he asked her.
She nodded for him. Unsure of what to say. It was exciting. She liked that Max was going to watch. It all felt safe. Jay was nice. Max would watch. Today was shaping up to be Maggie’s big day.
“Come here,” she said, and she led him to Jessie’s side of the room. She’d cleared a good sized space for him in her closet. The room wasn’t very big, and she’d cluttered it with a lot of junk Jessie swore she had ideas for; future purposes though, she imagined, knowing Jessie, would entail having to get some guy to come by and take them to the dump at the end of the school year.
Jessie had a sawhorse in there, amongst other things, including a creepy mannequin she stole from an abandoned Woolworth’s they were closing down in the Village. It stood in the corner, and Maggie made her make it face the wall because she said if she ever saw that thing’s eyes facing out she’d never set foot in the dorm again. This morning, before she’d gone to paint, she’d arranged random items to lean against the sawhorse, and then a drop cloth draped over which could be pulled closed; an excellent spot to spy on her from.
They held hands, both hands, facing each other, staring into one another. She said, “I made a spot for you to hide.”
“Thanks,” he said.
“You’re sure?”
“Stop asking, already. You know I’m sure.”
“Yeah,” she sighed. Still couldn’t believe it. He gave her hands a few pumps, a few good squeezes, said, “Okay?” again and he let her go, moved into the closet doorframe and looked around. He said, “I didn’t think I’d fit in here. It’s bigger than I thought.”
“Max?”
“What?” he said, turning.
“Can you...take your clothes off?”
“What? Why?”
“I want you vulnerable.”
“I don’t want to be vulnerable, Maggie.”
“That’s not fair. I’m—”
“Maggie, it’s Jessie’s closet, she’d flip—”
“She’s not here, we’ll be done, Max, I’ll be naked...”
His face shook with eagerness. he said, “Will you?”
“I might be,” she smiled. “I don’t know, Max. Would you just do it, please? It’s...I like it...I want it...” she slipped her hands up his polo shirt and smoothed them up his body. “Please?”
“I feel so weird,” he said.
“I do too. It’s only fair. Don’t you think it’s hot?”
“I guess,” he s
aid, wavering, his hands poised like he would lift the hem of his shirt.
She got him started, using her hands already under there to pry it up his body. He let her, didn't struggle, just let himself be exposed. When she got it up to his chest he took it off by himself and she worked the button on his pants.
“Easy, Maggie,” he laughed, “...you’re so eager.”
“He’ll be here soon...”
“Okay, okay,” he said, and he helped her undo his pants, putting his hands over hers and taking his fly down.
“You’re hard already, Max,” she said, seeing his erection poking up to the right side of his zipper as it was drawn down.
“I know, this is so exciting.”
She pulled his fly open and pushed his pants down, watched his erection point to the floor and waited to see it slap up again.
“Wow, you’re so hard,” she laughed, seeing it bounce right up and smack his belly.
She had him naked except for his watch, and he stood with his hand between his legs, hiding himself from her, his eyes watching her.
“This what you wanted?” he smirked.
“Yeah,” she said, and she let her hands go up his bare arms and touch his stomach making him flinch.
“Don’t,” he said.
“Ticklish?”
“Today I am,” he said.
“Hide please,” she said. She watched him get into Jessie’s closet, completely naked, watched him bend to get under the sawhorse, turn and peer out, she moved the dropcloth over and hid him.