The meeting was held in an unfinished warehouse that seemed to LisBeth to be larger than Union Station. A choir directed by Moody’s well-known partner, Ira Sankey, filled the air with the sounds of familiar hymns as people crowded onto benches. When sufficient numbers had arrived, Sankey directed the crowd to several hymns in the tiny Gospel Hymns booklets that had been placed on every chair in the hall.
Promptly at eight o’clock, Mr. Moody stepped out and, planting his hands on the rail that ran along the front of the platform, began to speak. He was only about 5’6” tall, solid, and stout, with a full black beard and thick, luxuriant hair. Augusta leaned over and whispered, “He looks like a man of business—not at all what I imagined.”
“Friends,” he began, “The title of my message this evening is simply ‘The Gospel.’ I read from First Corinthians, chapter fifteen, verse one. ‘I declare unto you the gospel which I preached unto you, which also ye have received, and wherein ye stand.’ I do not think there is a word in the English language so little understood as the word. gospel We hear it every day, and we have heard it from our earliest childhood, yet there are many people, and even as many Christians, who do not really know what it means. The word gospel means good news. When the angels came down to proclaim the tidings, what did they say to those shepherds on the plains of Bethlehem? ‘Behold I bring you sad tidings?’ No! ‘Behold, I bring you bad news?’ No! ‘Behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.”
Moody spoke with earnestness and simplicity. LisBeth listened, longing for joy in her own heart.
“Before I was converted, I used to look on death as a terrible monster. He used to throw his dark shadow across my path.”
LisBeth remembered getting the news of Little Big Horn and getting off the train to find that her mother was gone. Yes, she had also looked on death as a terrible monster.
Moody continued, “I felt a coward then. I thought of the cold hand of death feeling for the cords of life. But that is changed now. The grave has lost its terror.”
LisBeth wondered and wished that the grave held no terror for her.
“As I go on toward heaven I can shout, ‘O death! where is thy sting?’ That last enemy has been overcome, and I can look on death as a crushed victim. All that death can get now is this old Adam, and I do not care how quickly I get rid of it. I shall get a glorified body, a resurrection body, a body much better than this. The gospel has made an enemy a friend. What a glorious thought, that when you die you but sink into the arms of Jesus, to be borne to the land of everlasting rest! ‘To die,’ the apostle says, ‘is gain.”
As she listened to Moody describe how his own view of death had changed, LisBeth was reminded of the joy that Augusta had said lit Jesse’s face when she was discovered, dead, in her bed. Augusta had once said that it was the very same smile that they saw when Jesse talked about Rides the Wind.
Moody was continuing, “Another terrible enemy was sin. The gospel tells me my sins are all put away in Christ. Out of love to me, He has taken all my sins and cast them behind His back.”
LisBeth thought about Jim Callaway and the joy in his face when he described the night he had realized that his past was forgiven. Jim Callaway viewed God as his friend. LisBeth longed to know God as her friend. Was there sin standing in the way? I’ve been so angry at God. So rebellious. So bitter. LisBeth was convicted that perhaps she had hung onto the bitterness and the anger for so long that they had, indeed, become sin.
“There is another enemy that used to trouble me a great deal—judgment. I used to look forward to the terrible day when I should be summoned before God. I could not tell whether I should hear the voice of Christ saying, ‘Depart from Me, ye cursed,’ or whether it would be, ‘Enter thou into the joy of thy Lord.’ The gospel tells me that is already settled. ‘There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus.’ I am not coming into judgment for sin. God’s Word has settled it. Christ was judged for me, and died in my stead, and I go free.”
Moody spoke with compassion and his message pierced LisBeth’s heart. She wanted her inner enemies to be conquered. She wanted the inner peace that she’d seen in the lives of Jesse King and Jim Callaway, the kind of peace that Mr. Moody was talking about. She wanted to know that she belonged to God. She decided that that meant she had to give up the bitterness and the anger.
“Sinner, would you be safe tonight? Would you be free from the condemnation of the sins that are past, from the power of the temptations that are to come? Then take your stand on the Rock of Ages. Let death, let the grave, let the judgment come. The victory is Christ’s and yours through him.”
Victory. LisBeth pondered the word and thought, Yes, God, I want victory. I want the struggle inside to be finished. I need help to get through it. I want to know You. I want to know that You will help me just like You helped Mama and Jim. Wondering if he would forgive her, LisBeth held up her anger and her bitterness to God. Then, she turned her attention to the great evangelist as he offered God’s answer to her unspoken prayer.
“It is a free gospel; any one may have it. If you would like Christ’s own Word for it, come with me to that scene in Jerusalem where the disciples are bidding him farewell. Calvary with all its horrors is behind him; Gethsemane is over and Pilate’s judgment hall. He has passed the grave and is about to take his place at the right hand of the Father. The hour of parting has come. Is he thinking about himself in these closing moments? No, he is thinking of you. You imagined he would think of those who loved him? No, sinner, he thought of you then. He thought of his enemies, those who shunned him, those who despised him, those who killed him.
“He gives His disciples His farewell charge, ‘Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.’ I can imagine Peter saying, ‘Lord, do you really mean that we shall preach the gospel to every creature?’
“ ‘Yes, Peter.’”
“ ‘Shall we go back to Jerusalem and preach the gospel to those Jerusalem sinners who murdered you?’”
“ ‘Yes, Peter, go back and tarry there until you are endued with power from on high. Offer the gospel to them first. Go search out that man who spat in my face and tell him I forgive him; there is nothing in my heart but love for him. Go search out the man who put that cruel crown of thorns on my brow; tell him I will have a crown ready for him in my kingdom, if he will accept salvation; there shall not be a thorn in it, and he shall wear it for ever and ever in the kingdom of his Redeemer. Find that man who took the reed from my hand, and smote my head, driving the thorns deeper into my brow. If he will accept salvation as a gift, I will give him a scepter, and he shall sway it over the nations of the earth. Yes, I will give him to sit with Me upon my throne. Go seek that man who struck Me with the palm of his hand; find him and preach the gospel to him; tell him that the blood of Jesus Christ cleanseth him from all sin, and my blood was shed for him freely. Go seek out that poor soldier who drove the spear into my side; tell him that there is a nearer way to my heart than that. Tell him that I forgive him freely; and tell him I will make him a soldier of the cross, and my banner over him is love.’ ”
As the great evangelist drew his word picture, LisBeth pictured the beloved soldier in her past and the battle where he was killed and the brother who was involved. The message of forgiveness spilled over her. For the first time she considered the Christ who had been so badly mutilated and yet had asked God to forgive his tormentors. LisBeth was weeping as the great evangelist came to the end of his message. Augusta gripped her hand and felt her tremble as Moody finished his sermon.
“I thank God I can preach the gospel. I thank God for the ‘whosoevers’ of the invitation of Christ. ‘God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on him should not perish, but have everlasting life,’ and ‘whosoever will, let him take the water of life freely.’ ”
The last remnant of LisBeth King Baird’s doubting fell away. The final bits of bitterness and ang
er were cast out of her life. They were replaced by a flood of peace and joy. Finally, she was able to believe and to take the water of life. In later years, LisBeth would look back on the service and say, “That night, the Lord satisfied my thirsty soul and filled it with what is good.”
When the meeting concluded, LisBeth and Augusta bid the Jennings good night and rode back to the hotel in silence. LisBeth looked up at the clear, star-filled sky and was suddenly filled with such joy that she thought her heart might burst. She tried to explain it to Augusta but found that she could not.
“I’m just so happy, Augusta. I don’t feel bitter or angry anymore. I really think that God will be my friend now, and it’s good to be alive. I can’t wait to get home to tell Jim about it.”
The moment she heard herself speak Jim Callaway’s name, she stopped abruptly and looked at Augusta with amazement.
“What is it, dear?”
“I just realized it. It’s been there all along, but I didn’t want to see it.”
“Yes?”
“And I think it’s all right, Augusta. Somehow, I know it’s all right with Mac.”
“What is all right with Mac?”
“That I love Jim Callaway.” LisBeth smiled broadly and repeated it. “I love Jim Callaway!”
The morning after her conversion, LisBeth Baird called on Lucy Jennings to request the name of a good dressmaker. Lucy provided the name, and LisBeth took a few yards of turkey red calico to her shop and convinced the young woman to make an exception and promise a finished dress in only a few days. Augusta and LisBeth spent a few extra days in St. Louis, and then LisBeth sent a telegram to Joseph Freeman in Lincoln, Nebraska.
When the train pulled into Lincoln, LisBeth tried not to look. She took great care to arrange the pleats of her skirt and beat at the dust that had collected on the hem of her turkey red calico dress. As Augusta descended from the car behind her, LisBeth bent to pick up her satchel. The tips of two scarred boots came into view. They were trail worn and hadn’t been polished.
LisBeth stood up abruptly, her eyes following the line of the rumpled denim work pants, up each button of the blue flannel work shirt, to the slightly cleft chin, the aristocratic nose, and finally, the gray-green eyes. She waited, but Jim didn’t speak. His eyes were serious and cool, and they held the flicker of a question.
Standing on tiptoe, LisBeth leaned towards the broad chest and whispered, “You may not be rich, and you may just be a simple farmer, but you’re my Jim. You love me, and you love my Lord, and that’s all I’ll ever want. I’ve come home, Jim.” To the shock of passersby, she kissed him on the cheek.
It was all Jim needed. The question went out of his gray-green eyes. They were flooded with warmth as he bent low to whisper something back. What he whispered was just for LisBeth’s ears. But he called her Lizzie, and she loved the sound of it.
Chapter 36
Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing.
Psalm 30:11
It was after Christmas before the news of Rachel Brown’s death reached the Santee Normal Training School. Charity told James and Martha Red Wing, who told John Thundercloud, expressing grave concern for Soaring Eagle.
“What will he do now, John? He seems to have found faith, but this is just one more loss for him. He’ll never see little Carrie again. I know that our God knows what is best, but sometimes in my own human weakness, I look on things like this and wonder about it. It seems that God could have given Soaring Eagle some happiness before testing his faith.”
“May I borrow one of your horses, James?” John wanted to know. “I’ll find him and tell him.”
John nodded. “He headed north along the creek.”
“Pray for us. Pray that I’ll say the right things.” John leaped onto the borrowed horse and easily caught up with Soaring Eagle. The two rode side by side for a while, until Soaring Eagle said, “You must say what you have come to say, John. I know you have bad news. You try to act as if you are only on a ride, but the horse has been running hard, you hold the reins too tightly, and it is James Red Wing’s horse.”
With a silent prayer, John Thundercloud said, “Rachel Brown died just before Christmas, Soaring Eagle.”
Soaring Eagle pulled his black mare up sharply and asked sadly, “And what will become of the little Red Bird?”
“She’ll stay with her grandparents in St. Louis. It is said that they are good people and that they are happy to have her with them. She will have a good home.”
Soaring Eagle looked at the horizon and took another deep breath. John Thundercloud watched him closely, and tried to offer comfort. “Rachel was happy to have made it home, Soaring Eagle. They said she just went away—like the snow melting in the spring. I am sorry I had to bring you this news. I know she was a good friend to you. I don’t know why God lets these things happen. Sometimes there just don’t seem to be any answers except that He is working things out for the good of those He loves. I don’t know if that offers you any comfort, but I know that it’s true.”
The two dismounted and began to walk, and the black mare nuzzled Soaring Eagle’s shoulder affectionately. He stopped to run his hands through her mane and began to talk.
“When I was a boy, my father died. In the way of my people, I cut off my hair and wailed with grief. There was an emptiness that no one could fill.
“When I was young, Walks the Fire was taken from among the people. I thought she was dead. Once again, I cut off my hair in grief. I slashed my arms and the emptiness inside me grew.
“When I was a man, my people were scattered. There was nothing to do but come here. I filled the emptiness inside with bitterness and anger.”
Soaring Eagle looked at John Thundercloud and a faint smile came to his face. “I was filled with bitterness and anger. But Carrie Brown put her hand in mine and was my friend. Rachel Brown told me that God loved me. Now they are gone. I will wail and mourn. But I am not empty, John Thundercloud.”
Soaring Eagle’s eyes misted over. “You have said that Jesus promises that his children will see those that we love again. I will see Rachel and Carrie Brown again.”
Thunderclould responded, “I came here filled with advice for you, Soaring Eagle, thinking that I would have to encourage you to overcome bitterness and anger toward God. God’s Word says that ‘if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.’ When I look at you, I see a new creature.”
Soaring Eagle agreed. “Yes, that is it. That is how I feel. Inside, there is something new.” Leaping astride his mare, Soaring Eagle challenged, “Come, I will race you back to James Red Wing’s. You will see how this little mare can run.” And he was off, clinging to the sides of his pony as she darted across the prairie.
LisBeth spent the first two weeks of January writing letters. She sent them off with no small amount of prayer and waited nervously for replies.
January 15, 1878
Dear David,
Duplicity is not something I relish being accused of, and so I will make this letter a straightforward one. Jim Callaway has asked me to be his wife. He actually made his proposal before Augusta and I came to Philadelphia for the holidays. However, he forbad me to give an answer before I had spent the holiday with you and your mother. He wanted me to have every chance to experience the kind of life I was giving up if I accepted him.
David, please believe me when I tell you that I did not come to Philadelphia under pretense. I did not hold you up for comparison to someone else. I shall always think of you and your mother with great affection.
I know that you would prefer no detailed explanations of how my heart was turned to another. It would pain you and, not being an educated woman, I fear that my powers of communication would fall woefully short of expressing it all accurately.
It was after hearing the famous Mr. Moody preach in St. Louis that many things were brought to closure for me.
I hope that God will enable you to rejoice for m
e, David. I am finally, fully happy again after a long season of grief.
Please remember me to your mother with my fondest regards. Perhaps it is a naivete on my part, but I will continue to hope that we will have the pleasure of both her and your company again when you are in Lincoln.
David, I wish you the greatest happiness. If this letter brings you sorrow, please know that I have written it with the best intentions. I truly believe that I am following God’s will for my life. Since I believe that, I also believe that it would not have been his best for either one of us had I accepted your proposal. Believing those things, we must both conclude that He has a better plan for you, David. I will pray that He will hasten to reveal the better way to you, and that He will grant you wisdom and great happiness in the future.
Your sincere and devoted friend,
LisBeth King Baird
January 15, 1878
Dear Sarah,
This is a letter that pains me because I fear it may cause you pain, but I will pray that God will explain to your heart what I cannot and enable us to continue through life as the devoted sisters that we have become.
Sarah, you above all others know how very confused and lost I have been this past year and a half. MacKenzie and Mother’s deaths set me afloat. It has taken a year and a half of love from those around me and love from God to finally and completely anchor me to the Rock of Ages.
When Augusta and I stopped in St. Louis to see poor little Carrie Brown, we found a happy child who was simply trusting Jesus for the future. That played a part in what was to occur. With Carrie’s grandparents, we attended a service of the great evangelist D. L. Moody, and at that service all the things that Mother ever taught me finally made sense—for me.
Jim Callaway has often told me that my problems were centered on the fact that I was trying to live on my mother’s faith. He said that I needed a faith of my own. Well, thanks to the grace of God at work through D. L. Moody, I have got a faith of my own, and now I know, I really know what Mother was talking about all those years. My own faith is a new one, and not so great as hers, but I think it is genuine, and I am seeing differences every day in the way I respond to life. I am finally, fully at peace.
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