‘Do you think so?’ I said, not knowing whether I’d ever want to go through that whole rigmarole again. Dating was such hard work.
I’d have to watch what I ate, pretending I was really into fruit and salads and healthy-eating stuff and do my best to hide my addiction to Nutella spread thickly onto bread.
I’d have to think about doing some exercise. Uggh.
I’d have to keep my body in peak physical form, well as peak as it got with me. I’d have to shave and moisturise and polish parts of my body that had been left to their own devices for months and had frankly run riot. It would be a mammoth task.
I’d have to find some interesting hobbies to talk about. Watching back to back episodes of Come Dine with Me and Dinner Date didn’t really count as a hobby.
I would have to be a much more interesting and entertaining companion than I’d probably been to Ed these last few months.
No, getting back out there seemed far too overwhelming. Ed knew everything about me, all my foibles and funny little ways. I thought he found them endearing. I didn’t have to try too hard with Ed – or at least I thought I didn’t have to. Perhaps I should have tried harder.
The thought only just occurred to me, but maybe that’s where I’d gone wrong. Had I taken him and our relationship for granted? I wasn’t sure I wanted to start all over again with someone new.
‘I know so,’ said Mandy, interrupting my day-dreaming. ‘If I hadn’t left my first husband when I did I would never have met Bob. We often say that it was fate that brought us together, don’t we, love?’ Bob had wandered in from the kitchen and Mandy reached out for his hand. She looked at him as though it was Johnny Depp standing there when in truth he looked more like Johnny Vegas, but what did it matter when they were both clearly devoted to each other. ‘You might not think so now, but you’ll probably look back on this period and realise that this was the best thing that ever happened to you. You’ll go on to much bigger and brighter things, believe me. And who knows, if it doesn’t work out with Ed, you’ll meet someone else, someone special, and you’ll realise then that this was all meant to be.’
She made it sound so utterly believable that all I could do was nod my head in agreement. Perhaps there was some hope for me after all.
‘Thanks, Mandy, Bob. The rocky road was fab,’ I said, putting the last of it into my mouth. I picked up my bag from the floor.
‘Well, make sure you pop in tomorrow,’ said Mandy. ‘Just so as I know you’re all right.’
‘Okay,’ I said, heading for the door.
‘Promise?’ said Mandy, smiling.
‘I promise.’
Chapter Six
Mandy had told me the Hollybush was tucked away down one of the back lanes, but it wasn’t difficult to find. The throb of music beckoned me to the pub that already had people spilling outside on to the pavement, the earlier rain having stopped. For a moment I faltered, wondering whether this was a good idea or not, and whether I shouldn’t just go back to the hotel instead, but then I realised I had nothing better to do. No one would be waiting for me, wondering where I was, so I took a deep breath and ventured inside.
I felt conspicuous, as though everyone was looking at me. I was sure I’d be emitting ‘recently dumped’ signals and people would be giving me sympathetic glances, certain they’d be able to see through me to the terrible secret I was carrying inside. So I was relieved that not even a single eyelash was batted in my direction.
There was a small snug bar with a few tables dotted around and then beyond the bar a bigger room where the main act, The Breaknecks, were playing. I bought myself an orange juice, still trying hard to look as though I wasn’t on my own in a completely strange place, and as if I was just waiting for my huge bunch of non-existent friends to turn up, and found a seat in the corner out of the way.
There was a real buzz about the place and I was more than happy to sit, sipping on my drink, indulging in a bit of nonchalant people watching.
Talking to Mandy had really lifted my mood. Perhaps she was right. Perhaps I’d had a lucky escape. Perhaps all this had happened for a reason and one day that reason would become apparent. The universe worked in mysterious ways and perhaps this was its way of telling me that Ed was the wrong man for me and there was my very own Bob or Johnny Vegas or more hopefully Johnny Depp out there waiting for me. To be honest, if that was the case, I would much have preferred to be told straight and upfront, and been rid of all the heartbreak and trauma, but who was I to question the workings of the universe?
I tapped my foot, swaying in time to the music in my seat. Ed would never have come to an event like this. He wasn’t into live music – not unless it was at Wembley Stadium or the 02 along with eighty thousand other people. There’d been a time when a whole crowd of us, including Ed, Ben and Sophie, had loved these sorts of nights, trawling the pubs, drinking ourselves silly, laughing over complete and utter nonsense until we almost fell out of our seats, but once Ed had secured his job at the investment bank in the City, he seemed to change and those nights became a thing of the past. Instead, he’d preferred to go out to expensive restaurants or to corporate events with his new colleagues. Networking was key, apparently, and although we still had plenty of fun it was a different type of fun. Looking back, that was probably when we’d lost touch a bit with Ben and the others.
‘Mind if I join you?’
I looked up to see a powerhouse of a guy standing over my little table. He was that tall he had to duck his head slightly to avoid the ceiling and his broad frame blocked out what little light had been hitting my corner of the room.
‘Yes, sure,’ I said, shuffling my seat along to make room for him, trying to ignore the frisson of fear that was rippling along my skin.
He wasn’t my type at all, but his overwhelming physical presence was completely compelling. Underneath his tight black T-shirt were muscles that were literally bulging at the seams to escape. Muscles that took a hell of a lot of hours in the gym to maintain, I didn’t doubt. His hair was dark, but cropped close to his head to match the swathe of stubble around his jaw. An elaborate tattoo of something I couldn’t quite work out travelled the length of his left arm. A whiff of something not entirely disagreeable reached my nose.
‘You alone?’ he asked.
‘Yes,’ I said, immediately regretting my answer. No, I’m waiting for my black-belt karate expert boyfriend would have been a much better response in the circumstances.
‘Great,’ he said with a smile, landing his pint of beer on the table. ‘What’s your name?’
‘My name?’ It wasn’t a difficult question, but at that particular moment coming from this particular man it completely foxed me. I laughed.
‘Oh, my name? Yes, it’s, um, Persephone.’ Honestly, I don’t know where that came from at all. It just tripped off my tongue before my brain had even had chance to catch up. Oh God. What to do? I thought about saying, Oops, sorry, silly me, that’s not really my name at all, my name’s Anna, but for the sake of preserving some kind of illusion of sanity, I just let it loose right out there.
‘Persephone? Wow, that’s pretty exotic. What’s that, Greek or something?’
‘Yes, Greek,’ I said, nodding madly, looking frantically around the room for some means of escape. ‘Although I’m not Greek, but I was conceived on a Greek island so that’s why my parents decided on it.’ It really was true, the more you lied the easier it became.
‘That’s sweet. And what does it mean, then?’
Shit. What the heck did he mean what does it mean? How the hell should I know? It was my name, wasn’t it? Wasn’t that enough? Although I supposed I ought to know what it meant.
‘It means exotic flower,’ I said in a blinding moment of inspiration. Weren’t all Greek names exotic flowers?
‘Really?’ He had dark brown expressive eyes that shone with something I couldn’t quite decipher. ‘Well, that’s pretty cool. You suit your name.’ He laughed gently, his gaze flitting around my face i
n a way that did funny things to my insides. ‘You are definitely an exotic flower.’
Phew. Crisis averted. I dropped my gaze, fiddling with the stem of my glass. I felt my skin prickle with embarrassment. This man was clearly being kind. I was hardly an exotic flower today, more a wilting wallflower.
‘What’s your name?’ I asked, retrieving my basic communication skills. I looked back up into those eyes that were still watching me closely.
‘Dave.’
‘Ah!’ I nodded. ‘Nice.’ It kind of spoilt the moment. Dave and Persephone didn’t sound like a match made in heaven to me, but it didn’t matter. Dave seemed like a good sort and I felt certain he would be perfect company for an evening spent watching the band who had been churning out some pretty decent tunes for the last half-hour and were now taking a well-earned break. ‘Can I get you another drink, Persephone? Something stronger, perhaps?’ he asked, eyeing my orange juice.
‘A glass of white wine would be lovely,’ I said brightly, feeling a lot more relaxed now, the hubbub of the pub, the music and Dave’s easy company lifting my spirits. I gave a momentary thought to Ed, wondering what he might be doing and who he might be doing it with. Perhaps I’d played right into his hands by running away. This would be the perfect opportunity for Ed and Sophie to spend time together. My stomach twisted at the unwelcome reminder. Would he even care that I was sitting in a strange pub enjoying a drink with a strange man? Somehow I doubted it.
I sighed and pushed the thoughts away as I watched Dave saunter up to the bar. It was clear his overwhelming physical presence wasn’t just having an impact on me as I couldn’t help noticing the way the crowds magically dispersed to let him through. Confidence oozed from every pore of his body, but it was more than simply confidence that marked out his appearance. There was an edge of danger to his demeanour that attracted attention from every possible quarter, men and women alike. Dave was as far removed from Ed as it was possible to be. He looked rough and ready in a polished way, if that were possible, but already I sussed there was far more to him than that. His voice was warm and educated, and there was an intelligence in his searching brown eyes, belying his earthy physical appearance. That and the sexual energy that radiated from his every movement was an intriguing combination.
Not that I was interested in Dave’s sexual energy on a personal level, obviously, it was merely an observation on my part.
‘There you go,’ he said, presenting me with a glass on his return. ‘So tell me, Percy – can I call you Percy …?’
‘Everyone does,’ I said, laughing nervously, waving my hand around with a flourish. I still don’t know what had possessed me to tell him my name was Persephone, that was a definite moment of madness, but I think I must have been aiming for glamorous, spontaneous and exotic even, as the name had suggested to him, but now he wanted to call me Percy? It made me sound like somebody’s grandfather.
‘Do you live around here then?’
‘No, I live in London. I’m just here …’ The words escaped me. For what? To get away from my cheating fiancé? To recover from a broken heart? To work out what it is I’m going to do with the rest of my life? All of those things, but I didn’t want to be shouting that sort of news across a crowded pub. ‘I’m just here for a few days on business.’
‘Oh right, and what sort of business are you in then?’
Dave seemed to have 101 questions up his sleeve. I was way out of my depth here. I thought of Ben in his lovely little cottage, his cosy kitchen and the warmth of his double bed, and wondered why I’d ever thought coming away was such a good idea. Then I realised Dave was looking at me expectantly waiting for a reply. What the hell would Persephone do for a living? I wondered.
‘I’m a jewellery designer,’ I said, with my second blinding flash of inspiration of the day. ‘I’m putting together a new range based on a seaside theme so I’ve come to pick up some ideas. I’m gathering shells, seaweed, that sort of thing, to make up a collage that I can use back at home.’ It sounded pretty convincing even to me.
‘Ah, an exotic job to match the exotic name,’ he said, smiling, and I wondered if he wasn’t teasing me. But then again if there was anything I’d come to realise these last couple of days it was that I was absolutely crap at picking up on signals. Perhaps Dave was just making polite conversation, being friendly.
‘What about you, Dave. What do you do for a living?’
‘Import/export,’ he said with a shrug. ‘Pays the bills.’
‘Ah, okay.’ I nodded sagely, as if I knew exactly what that meant. In truth, I didn’t have the foggiest, but judging by Dave’s tight-lipped response, it didn’t look as though he would be enlightening me any further. Still, I was thankful for that. Sometimes there was nothing worse than listening to someone rattling on about their job, especially a stranger, especially one who had such a boring job as importing and exporting stuff.
To be honest, tonight I didn’t have the energy even to pretend to be interested. I think my mind had gone into full shut-down mode. It couldn’t really cope with any new information. It was still trying to assimilate what had gone on in the last couple of days. No, I was more than content to just sit there with Dave, drinking my wine, listening to the music and passing the time of day.
‘But you live around here, though?’ I asked.
‘No.’ He turned his gaze to look at me. In profile, I noticed the defined lines of his jaw, the thickness of his neck, the shadow of dark stubble and the single silver stud in his ear. Definitely not my type, but there was something about him that had me staring at him in rapt fascination. ‘I’m here on business, too, just for a few days. How about that? You here on your own, then?’
I nodded again. I seemed to be doing a lot of nodding in Dave’s direction.
‘Well, maybe we should hang out. Keep each other company.’
‘Yeah,’ I said nonchalantly, as though I was used to hanging out with strange men. I couldn’t imagine we’d have a lot in common, but I didn’t have anything else to do and maybe spending time with someone I wouldn’t come across in my normal everyday life would give me a different perspective. I’d spent so long cocooned in the safety of my friendship group, although I’d definitely use that term loosely now, that maybe I needed to widen my social circle, step outside my comfort zone.
That’s what I need, I thought, taking a sip from my wine and turning my attention back to the group. A different perspective. Dave might be the perfect place to start.
Once the band started playing again it was difficult to have any kind of conversation so we had the perfect excuse to just sit there in silence, occasionally nodding and smiling at each other.
When the gig was over, we wandered outside into the busy street.
‘Where are you staying?’ he asked.
‘At the Grand View,’ I said, looking up at his huge frame. He walked with a swagger that I suspected had something to do with the width of his thighs and the bulkiness in his arms.
‘Really? There’s obviously a bit of money in jewellery design, then,’ he said with a chuckle. ‘I’m at the Sea Lodge down the cheap end of town. Suits me, though, it’s only somewhere to put my head down of a night. What do you want to do now, then? Shall I walk you back to your hotel or do you fancy a stroll along the beach?’
I liked his directness and although I’d only known him for a matter of hours I sensed I’d be safe in his company. Besides, I knew whatever time I got back to bed I’d be struggling to get to sleep so Dave’s offer was welcome. Maybe Anna would have scuttled back to her hotel, but Persephone was much more open to the idea of a midnight stroll with an attractive stranger. Persephone was a free spirit. Anna was chasing after her.
‘Come on,’ he said, putting an arm around my shoulder and leading me across the road. I wasn’t prepared for the way his touch made me feel: feminine, vulnerable and protected all at the same time. I leant into his side, relishing the warmth there. It would have been so easy to lose myself in his huge body, to imm
erse myself in his manly scent, to give into the increasingly strong desires of Persephone and to completely forget about Anna and the woes of her sorry little life.
The seafront looked completely magical with fairy lights twinkling along the wrought ironwork of the promenade and the pier standing proud against the rugged landscape. It was surprisingly busy for the time of night, with all the people spilling out from the pubs and clubs. The air was fresh but invigorating and the sound of the waves lapping gently was a noise I always found to be reassuringly comforting.
We walked down the steep steps onto the stony beach with Dave guiding me over the uneven surface. I hung onto his arm for dear life, giggling as my feet gave way beneath me into the shifting pebbles.
‘There’s something life-enhancing about being beside the sea, don’t you think? I wouldn’t mind living by the coast one day,’ Dave said, stopping to look at a ship in the distance.
‘Oh, me too.’ I sighed wistfully. Maybe we had more in common than I thought. ‘Fancy being able to come down to the beach every day. Walking your dog. That would be amazing.’
‘You have a dog?’
I laughed. ‘Not yet. But it’s on my wish list.’ My gaze drifted out to sea. It was something Ed and I had planned for when we’d moved into our new house. A puppy. Now it could be added to the long list of broken dreams. I sniffed back a rogue tear and held my arms out wide, relishing the sensation of the breeze pricking at my face. ‘If I had my way I’d move down here tomorrow.’
‘Really? What’s stopping you, then?’
I looked up into Dave’s open face. Bizarrely, my arms wanted to reach up to smooth my hand over his magnificent head, to feel the light covering of hair there. All the men I’d gone out with in the past had been nothing more than boys really – student types with floppy hair and skinny jeans, boys I’d spent my childhood growing up with. Ed had been one of them until he turned into a clean-cut City boy. But Dave was in another league entirely. He was definitely all man.
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