Rose insisted I keep myself comfortable when I came over, so I made a cup of coffee. It was pretty much the middle of the night, but I had been running on a very odd sleep schedule since I got the detective job. I drank the cup down like water and went in her bedroom.
Rose looked beautiful as ever, even tangled up in her sheets with an oversized shirt on. I loved how she didn’t wear over the top nightwear or anything. The dark curls of her hair fell over her cheeks and blew with the snores of her open mouth. She didn’t snore like a sailor or anything, just natural, little snorts that made me smile.
I set my gun on her nightstand and sat gingerly on the edge of the bed, hoping I wouldn’t wake her. But she started to shuffle, and I turned to stare at her glazed open eyes. She smiled softly, still a bit half asleep.
“Hey, go back to sleep.” I tucked some hair behind her ear and smiled back. She looked at me like she didn’t recognize me for a second. I understood why though, I wasn’t in my usual attire. I had changed into jeans, a simple tee shirt, and a leather jacket. I hadn’t gotten tired of wearing the suit, but sometimes comfort just won out.
“Hmm. Will you lie with me?” Her soft, sweet voice was hard to resist. Though I didn’t even want to.
“Sure.”
She smiled and turned on her side. I stood up and kicked my shoes off, and took my jacket off. I laid next to her, and she moved to use my chest as a pillow. Her hand was warm as she clutched at my side and rested her body next to mine. I held her softly around her waist, inhaling the vanilla scent of her hair as her breaths evened out. She was back asleep.
I just laid there with her and idly traced the skin of her arm. The need to protect her at all costs was almost paralyzing. Mostly because I knew there wasn’t much information on the crimes as is.
I tried to distract myself with her. I focused on the soft globes of her breasts against my side, remembering what it felt like to hold them in my hands. The scent of her body alone was enough to drive me mad without her perfect body coming into the picture.
With my other hand, I grazed her scalp and twirled her soft curls around my fingers. I never expected to find a woman’s body so perfect. With all the others I just used them for their purpose and got on with it, but I found myself needing her against me just to get by. The nights I spent watching her had been the best I could remember having, even with the threat of her safety looming over my head.
There it was again.
My phone was on silent, but I knew it was ringing. The screen flashed with Nate’s name before I answered quietly.
“Hello?”
“Why the fuck are you whispering, man?”
I winced. “Rose is asleep.”
“Oh. Well look, we have a suspect in custody. On the Donald case. Guess it’s the Donald, Rogers, and Walker case. Plus, the dude that got shot.”
“Nate, what suspect?” I tried to get him back to ground zero. He just chuckled and kept on.
“I don’t know all the details. The incident matched all the other four, so we brought him in. Apparently, he was trying to rob some guy who turned out to be a fucking Navy SEAL. Retired, but he still knocked him out.”
“Fuck. Okay. I guess I’ll be down there in a few. I might have to bring Rose,” I responded. I hated the thought of waking her up.
“You have to bring her. We need her to look at the suspect. She’s a witness, remember?”
“Fuck,” I groaned. “Yeah. We’ll be there soon.” I told him.
“See you.” He hung up.
I sighed deeply and tossed my phone on the table. I turned to look at Rose, still fast asleep. Her twitching eyelids told me she was in a deep sleep. I frowned and grazed her cheek with my thumb softly as I cradled her face.
“Rose.” I said louder, “Rose.”
She grumbled something incomprehensible.
“Rose, you have to wake up.”
“What? Why?” she mumbled. I resisted the urge to laugh at her cuteness when she was sleepy.
“We have to go to the station. There might be a suspect in custody,” I explained. I didn’t want to alarm her too quickly, but I didn’t want to lie either.
“Oh.” She stretched out and yawned, and it made her body press even farther into mine. My body couldn’t help but react to hers, and I felt my cock twitch in my pants. Lucky for me she was too half asleep to notice.
Rose then sat up and stretched out. The swells of her breasts peeked under her shirt, and her nipples poked through the top, too. Fuck me.
“Let me just get dressed.” Her voice was still groggy, and she got up from the bed, walking slowly to the bathroom.
As she used the bathroom, I put my shoes back on and my jacket. She came back into the room and pulled clothes out of her dresser. I liked how messy her room was; it wasn’t a pig sty or anything, but it was like another part of her. The clothes peeking out of the dresser, the disorganized bookshelf, and the little pile of clothes on her side chair. It was just like her.
She started to undress, and I nearly lost it. “You must not want us to make it out of here,” I said to her.
She smirked at me as I stared at her breasts and watched them sway before she put her blue lacy bra on. I stared until she got fully dressed in her jeans and brown sweater. She stuck her feet in fluffy white slippers and I followed her out.
“Are you hungry?” I asked her as we passed her kitchen.
“No.” She locked Parker in his crate and refilled his water bowl. “I don’t really have an appetite. I mean, what if it’s him?” Worry laced her voice and I was honestly lost for words.
“Rose, you shouldn’t think like that.”
She met me by the door. “How can I not?” She shrugged and grabbed her purse, then we left.
The drive down to the station wasn’t long, but Rose got even more tense the closer we got. I held her hand, but she still clenched mine hard.
“I wish I could say it gets easier, but I don’t want you to ever have to deal with this kind of shit again,” I told her softly. I turned the radio off, and the silence of the car was deafening.
“So, the next time I see a crime I should just keep walking,” she sighed.
“No, cause that isn’t you. But…hopefully next time it won’t turn out to be involved with the Irish mob.”
She laughed a bit and I noticed her neck relax a little bit. “I hope not. So, what do we know about the suspect so far?” she asked me.
I shrugged my shoulders and took a hard-left turn. It was a wonder I ever got a license. “I don’t know, Nate didn’t tell me everything.”
I turned and saw the lines of her face draw inward. “Look, I don’t want you to be thinking about all that. Just go in and look at the guy. That’s all you have to do.”
She scoffed. “I’m not some dumb, average citizen you know. I don’t deserve to be kept in the dark all the time.” She took her hand from mine and crossed her arms. “If I want to know what’s going on with something I am directly involved in, I don’t think that’s absurd.”
“Rose…”
“Don’t ‘Rose’ me. Please. It’s more condescending than it is helpful.” She turned her knees to the window and looked out in anger.
I wished I had something to say to her, but she was right, and anything I was used to saying would just come off wrong, like she said. I just wanted her to feel better, and I wanted her to feel safe. But I couldn’t even do that. It made me feel shitty and pretty useless at that point.
“I’m sorry, really I am. I’m not good with…usually I can treat witnesses like parts of a case and nothing else, but I can’t do that with you.” I blew out a nervous breath. She turned to look at me after a moment.
“Why not?” she spoke softly.
“Because,” I half-laughed, “you’re fucking special to me, Rose. And you mean more to me than just…than this shit going on. I don’t want to hurt you, or scare you. I just want you to be happy. You’re more than shower sex or a surveillance stint. And I just keep thinki
ng…I just don’t want all the crap in this case to hurt you.” I inhaled deeply and pulled into the station.
She stayed silent as I parked the car and turned the engine off. She unbuckled her seatbelt and then leaned across and kissed my cheek. That sweet little gesture made my chest swell and everything but my cock twitch; it was new to me.
She hugged me softly, her hair rustling against my cheek, and I hugged her back. We got out of the car and then stopped before we went in the building.
“We can tell you everything inside,” I told her.
Her eyes were wide but sure as she nodded at me, and I almost felt stupid for underestimating her.
“Okay. Thank you.” She gave me a small smile. I hugged her once more, her body flush against mine as I inhaled her scent.
I knew then that I always wanted to hold her. And I always wanted to keep her safe, at any cost.
Chapter Twenty-One: Rose
The best sleep of my life was only slightly interrupted, but it only made it better, until it wasn’t.
Alex just felt so good against my body. And he smelled so fucking amazing. His stark cologne and natural, masculine scent flooded my nostrils and went right to every nerve in me. He was innocently touching me, yet my nipples were hard, and my sex was moistening and clenching. I wanted him so badly, yet I was in a deep sleep. He had so much of an effect on me it was ridiculous.
Even my dreams were more peaceful. I felt pretty much the same with Max; that safety and security. But it was still odd for me to be thinking about more than one man that way. I could still feel Max inside me. His cock was so thick, stretching me in ways I couldn’t even imagine. Hell, I still felt a pulsing inside me and the moisture of his seed. I wanted him again and again; it was maddening.
But I wanted Alex too. If I wasn’t so damned tired, I thought I would have made a move. I knew he wanted me too, because I felt his cock semi-hard against my thigh that I laid over him. Snuggling up next to him made me feel safe, and he wasn’t even doing anything. They all made me feel safe, and that was more important than anything.
Then like all things, something swept in and ruined it.
All the tension and the stress jut welled up inside me and I couldn’t control it.
It wasn’t good to keep things bottled up, because then they would come out at once, which they did. I didn’t mean to go off on Alex at all, it just kind of happened. Though everything I said was true. I just thought I could keep it more contained for a little while longer.
At the end of the day, I knew they just wanted to do what was best for me. They did so much for me already and I felt bad for even expecting more. Still, I wanted honesty from them. That was the most basic thing in any relationship, though it was hard to even think of us that way. I didn’t know what to do with all my feelings for them or our involvement. Nate was the only one I hadn’t been with, yet I still had strong enough feelings for him as I did Alex and Max.
All these things were running through my head and I just couldn’t take it.
To top it off, I was walking into another shit hole.
The police station looked much different than it did the first day I came. That day, I had no idea what I was walking into. If I could go back, I liked to think I wouldn’t make the statement, but I knew I still would have. I couldn’t have lived my life the same way ever again. Even with all of those things piling on, I was still glad that I told the truth. That I called the police and got help. I was glad I did something right, even when it was really hard.
It was all my father ever taught me to do. And I knew he would be proud of me.
I didn’t talk about him much because it was just too hard. He had always been a loyal soldier. Even when he was away, and I had to live alone, he was there for me. And when he was around, things were even better. He was a good father, and we both knew each other very well. When he went on his last tour, it was supposed to be his last before he was discharged. He would come home and then we could have a perfect life together. He thought about being a cop to pass the time, but he didn’t really need to. Passing all the men in uniform made me think of that. Needless to say, he wasn’t supposed to be killed in action. I didn’t even get to go to the funeral because according to official records, he never died. I never got to see him again. When I thought of walking out the door and running from the whole case, I thought of how he never ran from anything. Not even a fucking loaded grenade.
“Rose? You okay?” Alex touched my arm gently and brought me back to earth.
“Yeah.” I feigned a smile. “I’m fine.” I hoped I was convincing enough.
“Okay. It’s just through here.” He had his hand on the small of my back as he led me through the back of the station, and down a narrow hallway that ended with four doors.
It kind of looked just like the movies, with the people running around and the one-way glass. I shivered, and Alex held me close, thinking I was cold. Even though I wasn’t, I didn’t move away. I sort of needed him to keep me grounded. I wanted to keep a strong face on to keep them calm. The last thing they needed to do was worry about me, too.
“Nate is bringing him in from holding now. So, it shouldn’t be long.” Alex rubbed my arm softly.
I nodded in response.
“Okay. What do I have to do?” I asked him. I didn’t want to try and assume anything, and I hoped he wouldn’t think I wasn’t up for it.
“There will be a lineup of six guys here.” He pointed to the empty room with black, horizontal lines on the wall. It had height markings on the sides, and the wall was so dirty it wasn’t even white anymore. It could have been an egg wash brown.
“And then you just pick him out if you know it’s him. You won’t know which one we brought in, and if you’re sure it isn’t any of them, that’s okay too,” he told me calmly.
His eyes were deep and soulful as they bored into mine. And if I wasn’t in a police station, it would have aroused me. Though honestly, I could be aroused anywhere if it had to do with him. Even without the suit on, he just looked so dapper and handsome. I loved the way his hair fell to the side, and the lines of his face were hard yet soft at the same time. He had the jawline worthy of any sculpture, and lips I could taste for hours, though it had been so long since I had. I just thought fuck it and stood on my tiptoes to give him a quick peck. It was nothing special, and there was barely any tongue involved. Just the softness of our lips moving against each other for five seconds.
“I’m nervous.” I rested my head under his chin. I felt him nod as he rubbed my back soothingly.
“I know. You’ll be fine. They can’t see you, and we’re going to keep protecting you for as long as this case is still open.” He pulled back and looked at me, like he was studying me for any cracks in my resolve. They wouldn’t be hard to find.
“I wish you guys could have your lives back. Watching me all the time has to be boring.” I took a step back just to breathe again. He was too fucking distracting. His scent, his wide muscles, his…just his aura in general was maddening.
He laughed aloud and shook his head. “We didn’t have much of a life before. And watching you is not boring, I promise.” He gave me a once over that made me tingle in the most sensual way, even though we were in a precinct. I knew it.
He dropped his gaze and took his phone from his pocket, though I didn’t even hear it go off. He read the screen and tapped off a quick response before putting it back.
“They’re coming in.”
Chapter Twenty-Two: Rose
My first day on the job as a nurse wasn’t even hectic. I remember having one patient. A little boy who had an allergic reaction to peanut butter. It was so normal yet scary at the same time. He almost died because he had a Reese’s cup and didn’t know he was allergic to peanut butter. I remember obsessing over how crazy and unfair it was. But he was also lucky to have had such a good teacher. He was only four at the time.
I met Dina few days later and the days just got crazier. The patients more violent an
d the cases more interesting. But everything stayed the same. My job was to help people in their biggest crises, yet I couldn’t even get myself out of a crazy situation.
I had no idea how long I just stood there, off in my own world. I barely noticed Max and Nate showing up. I just knew the three of them were standing behind me, and another lawyer I didn’t even recognize. I knew it was the suspect’s, because he looked like dirty criminals paid his bills and he got them off. I don’t know how I knew that, it was just a look.
But that wasn’t the main thing.
Sometimes, I could remember things from years ago based on a certain smell, or something I see that would take me back to a moment; any moment. It didn’t even have to be important. I would see a kid in a blue shirt, and I would think of that kid from my first day who was allergic to peanut butter.
All it took was that goddamned triangle on his hand to take me back there. I could smell the air from that day; smoke from the train and exhaust from the restaurants nearby. There was the pine of the trees too, and the sap from the evergreens. I was in a small, aluminum box yet I could smell the nature from that day. I felt the sidewalk under my feet and the rise in my breath from the sprint I took after Parker.
I didn’t even have to look at his face to know it was him. I felt it in my bones. The other detective had them all say something, but I barely even listened. I felt his deep Irish accent stuck in my ears and I knew I would never forget it, but that didn’t matter.
All that mattered was that I knew I was looking at the killer. And possibly the man that attacked so many others. I wasn’t worried about him being the wrong guy because I was certain. All I worried about was myself—the Irish mob wasn’t a joke.
If they found out I named him, they would come after me. I considered lying. That lawyer would no doubt tell them, and it would be the end of me. Max, Alex, and Nate would no doubt protect me until the very end, but from all the pop culture and documentaries I saw, three cops wouldn’t stop the mob.
I could lie and never sleep well again, or I could tell the truth and have a limited amount of days. Only one thing would let me live my life the way I wanted, whether it was cut short or not.
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