by Connie Mason
“Aye,” Christy said. “I’ll return to feed her later, after I’ve shown Lady Lara to her chamber.”
Lara’s chamber was just a short distance down the narrow hallway. From the long windows Lara caught a glimpse of towering mountains, blue skies, and heather-laden hills. A woven rug covered the floor and the high bed sported heavy velvet curtains that could be closed to keep out the chill. Tapestries covered the stone walls and the windows were hung with velvet drapes, keeping winter’s chill at bay.
“I chose this room for you for its magnificent view,” Christy said. “Your clothing has already been unpacked and placed in the chest at the foot of the bed. You didn’t bring much with you so feel free to ask for anything you lack.”
She eyed Lara critically. “I’m taller than you but Margot is a wizard with a needle. Most of my London clothing is going to waste here in the Highlands where I favor plaids and simple shirtwaists.”
Christy lingered so long that Lara suspected she had something on her mind. She did, indeed, as Lara soon found out, and the beautiful Highland laird wasn’t one to mince words.
“I can’t imagine any woman refusing Julian’s proposal. I take it you don’t care for him.”
Lara flushed. If Christy only knew how much she did care … “Julian is … a special man,” Lara said, choosing her words carefully. “What woman wouldn’t care for him?”
“I thought as much,” Christy said smugly. “Is there a specific reason for your refusal?”
Lara hesitated. “Aye.”
“I’m sorry,” Christy apologized. “I don’t mean to pry, but Julian seemed quite eager to marry you. I thought it strange, for Julian told Sinjun he’d never marry or father a child after Diana’s death.” She clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh, forgive me. Sometimes I talk too much.”
“It’s all right,” Lara assured her. “I know all about Diana and Julian’s vendetta against those responsible for her death. She’s the reason I won’t marry Julian. I want the man I marry to love me as much as I love him.”
“But Diana’s dead,” Christy protested.
“Her ghost stands between us,” Lara maintained. “I won’t marry Julian until he buries her for good.”
Christy touched her hand. “I hope that happens soon. I’ll leave you to your rest while I tend to my daughter. Would you like a bath? Dinner isn’t until six-thirty, Lara. May I call you Lara?”
“Of course, and I’ll call you Christy. A bath sounds wonderful, Christy.”
Julian and Sinjun sat before the fire, discussing the situation at hand.
“I fear something has happened to Emma,” Julian announced worriedly. “If Blakely lets harm come to her I’ll call him out.”
“If Rory fails to learn anything about our impulsive sister, I’ll head a search party myself. Do you think you were followed here?”
Julian mulled over his answer. “Not to my knowledge, but I can’t be sure. But make no mistake, my enemies won’t leave a stone unturned until they find me.”
“Why do they want you dead?”
“I’m very close to discovering the identity of the man behind the lucrative smuggling operation that’s depriving our government of revenue. I’ve narrowed the field to three men. One of them is Lara’s father, but I pray I’m wrong.”
“Bloody hell! What a coil. Would Stanhope hurt his own daughter?”
“I can’t believe it of him, but I’m not ruling him out. ’Tis why I brought Lara here. I’m depending on you and Christy’s clansmen to protect her.”
“You can count on us, Julian,” Sinjun vowed. “I’ll alert the chieftains to be on the lookout for strangers.”
“I can take care of myself, Sinjun, ’tis Lara I’m worried about. She doesn’t deserve all this. Saving my life and claiming me … well, needless to say, I owe her more than I can ever repay.”
Sinjun frowned. “Is that why you want to marry her? From what I’ve observed, it appears that, well, that you and Lara are … well, more than friends.”
Julian flushed and looked away. “We are more than friends. You’ll probably find out anyway so I may as well tell you. Lara and I are lovers. I didn’t know she was an earl’s daughter when I … took her virginity. ’Tis only right that I offer her my name.”
“Lara seems reluctant to accept your proposal. Why is that?”
“It has to do with Diana,” Julian admitted. “Lara thinks I’m in love with a dead woman.”
Sinjun’s eyebrows inched upward. “Are you?”
“Bloody hell, Sinjun, you too? Diana’s been dead for many years. Her death cost me a great deal and I’ll not rest until she is avenged. But Lara is flesh and blood. I feel many things for Lara, among them the kind of lust I never felt for Diana. I can’t help feeling that I’m betraying Diana for experiencing deep emotions with Lara, but I’m not ready yet to face that. I have to deal with Diana’s killer first.”
“Far be it from me to give you advice,” Sinjun said, “but it seems to me that refusing to acknowledge your strong feelings for Lara is an error. Learn from my mistakes, brother. Being too stubborn to say the words Christy wanted to hear nearly cost me my wife and children.”
“I have to follow my conscience,” Julian explained. “But I will marry Lara before we return to London whether she agrees or not. She could be carrying my child.”
Sinjun chuckled. “And you called me a rake.”
“You don’t understand,” Julian said earnestly. “Lara and I have a Romany marriage. She married me to save my life when the Jackal’s men came looking for me. Of course I never considered it legal or binding, but I can’t deny I wanted to bed Lara once I recovered from my wounds. Lara never mentioned that she was an earl’s daughter.”
“And I thought Christy and I had problems,” Sinjun said, wagging his head. “I suppose you and Lara will have to work this out on your own. But you can rely on me to provide all the protection you require.”
“Thank you,” Julian said solemnly. “I knew I could depend on you.”
“Are you two catching up on news?” Christy asked as she strode into the hall. “Have you discussed Emma and what might have happened to her?”
“I’m on my way to speak with Rory and Gavin,” Sinjun said, rising. “Would you show Julian to his chamber? He’d probably like to clean up before dinner.”
Sinjun strode from the hall, and Julian followed Christy up to the solar.
“Can I peek in on my new niece?” Julian asked.
“Both Niall and Althea are sleeping, but it won’t hurt to look in on them,” Christy answered.
She opened the door to the nursery and Julian tiptoed inside, startling Effie, who sat sewing beside the cradle.
“It’s all right, Effie, this is Julian, Sinjun’s brother. He wants a peek at Althea.”
Julian approached the cradle and stared down at the tiny scrap sleeping peacefully in her snug bed. He couldn’t resist the urge to caress her cheek with the back of his hand, amazed at the softness. One day he and Lara might have a child like this, he reflected. That thought startled him, but it had definite appeal. Deep in thought, he turned away and followed Christy from the chamber.
“That’s Lara’s chamber,” Christy said, gesturing at a closed door farther down the corridor. “She’s probably bathing now. Your chamber is across the hall.”
Julian wanted to protest separate rooms but thought better of it. This wasn’t his home; he had to follow the rules set by its lady. But surprising Lara at her bath did sound tempting.
“Dinner will be served at six-thirty. You can escort Lara downstairs,” Christy said as she opened the door to a large chamber furnished with an array of solid, masculine furniture. “Your clothing has been put away. If you need to supplement your wardrobe, I’m sure Sinjun can find something to fit you. He wears mostly kilts these days and has plenty of clothing to spare.”
“Thank you, I’ll keep that in mind,” Julian said, eyeing the bed with longing. The narrow bed they’d occupied at the in
n the night before left much to be desired.
Julian prowled the chamber like a restless animal once he was alone. Lord knew he could use a nap, but curiosity about Lara’s sleeping accommodations wouldn’t allow it. Plus, he wanted to know what she thought of Sinjun and Christy, and how she liked Glenmoor, and if she was comfortable, and … There was no help for it. He wouldn’t rest easy until he spoke with Lara.
No one was about when Julian stepped out into the hallway. He quickly crossed the narrow corridor and rapped lightly on Lara’s door. When no one answered he turned the knob and let himself inside. She was still at her bath, her head resting on the rim of a tub that had been set up before the hearth.
The glow of leaping flames softened her golden skin. A riot of midnight black curls cascaded over the rim of the tub. Her eyes closed, she appeared to be sleeping. Julian crept closer, his body taut with wanting. Would desire for his wild Gypsy lover ever wane?
As if she sensed his presence, Lara’s eyes flew open.
“Julian! What are you doing here? This is my chamber.”
“I wanted to see if you were comfortable. When you failed to answer my knock, I let myself in.”
“I suggest you let yourself out,” Lara said curtly.
Julian stared at her. “What’s the matter, sweeting? You offered no objection when I watched you bathe in our room at the inn last night.”
“This is your brother’s home, Julian. Everything has changed.”
Julian bristled. “Nothing has changed. Our wedding will take place as soon as I find Emma. You’ll be my wife before I leave the Highlands. There’s a kirk in the village, and a minister who I’m sure will be happy to perform the ceremony.”
“We’ll see,” Lara demurred.
“Meanwhile,” Julian said, giving her a rakish smile, “there’s no reason for us to deny ourselves.”
Lara gave a startled cry when he reached into the cooling water and lifted her out of the tub. He snatched a linen towel from a bench near the hearth and wrapped it around her as he carried her to the bed.
“Julian, put me down. We’re in your brother’s home and—”
“And what?”
“We should be circumspect.”
“Circumspect be damned! It occurs to me that I’ve been far too prudent and sensible most of my life. Sinjun once called me an insufferable prig, and I have to agree. That’s what responsibility and duty does for one. But you changed all that, my wild Gypsy wench. I can think of nothing but spreading your legs and filling you with myself.”
His words set off a clamoring in Lara’s blood, a clamoring she tried desperately to ignore. But her love for this impossible man was so strong she could deny him little.
The mattress dented beneath Julian’s weight. He grinned down at her. “We’ve plenty of time before dinner.”
“We’re not married, Julian, you said so yourself. I’d feel guilty taking advantage of Christy’s hospitality.”
He whisked the towel from her body. “Christy doesn’t have to know. Besides, Christy is no fool. She’s probably guessed we’re lovers.” He bent his dark head and lingered a long moment over the corner of her mouth, pressing gentle kisses against it.
“Each time we’re together increases my risk of conceiving your child,” Lara argued.
He found her mouth. Lara sighed softly as she offered her lips. He kissed her breathless, then he lifted his head and said, “Don’t you think I know that?”
Lara reared up on her elbows. “You want to get me with child! I don’t understand.”
“I told you we were going to marry. It won’t matter in the least if you are increasing when our wedding vows are exchanged. At least you’ll have no excuse to beg off.”
Lara stared into his brilliant, determined gaze and gave him a tremulous smile. “Do you love me, Julian?”
“Does it matter?” Julian whispered against her lips.
“It does to me. Will you give up your vendetta against those responsible for Diana’s death?”
“Give it up?” Julian gasped, clearly astounded. “Not until the bastards are in prison.”
Lara’s heart sank. How could she be so wrong? Julian didn’t love her. For a brief moment she’d thought—no, hoped—he’d finally searched those dark reaches of his heart and discovered love.
“I’ll arrange everything, Lara,” Julian continued. “I’ve had a special license since before we left London, though I doubt one is necessary in the Highlands.”
He sat up and began stripping off his clothing. “Don’t worry about Christy or Sinjun. They know how it is between lovers. Besides, Sinjun already knows about our Romany marriage.”
“You told him?” Lara gasped.
“I had to explain about us.” He threw off the last of his clothing and covered her with his body. “Are you going to shut up and let me love you?”
“I think not,” Lara said, squirming out from under him. She picked up her robe and shoved her arms inside. “I’ll marry you and let you make love to me when you can say that you love me and mean it.”
“I care for you deeply,” Julian said, reaching for her. She scooted away.
“What do you have against loving again? Diana is dead. Why is finding love with another woman abhorrent to you?”
Julian charged to his feet. “Bloody hell, Lara, what do you want from me? My soul? Loving is dangerous. Loving means dying a little when someone you care about is taken from you. There, are you satisfied?”
Lara’s mouth gaped open. She would never have guessed that Julian was afraid to love again. Afraid to lose again. Afraid that the one he loved would be taken from him.
“So you prefer to keep your feelings buried deep inside you rather than love again,” she said dully. “I feel sorry for you, Julian. When you realize how wrong you’ve been, I might decide you’re not worth the waiting.”
“Dammit, Lara, there’ll be no need to wait. We’re going to be married in a few days and I won’t take no for an answer.”
He closed the distance between them and pulled her into his arms. “Go ahead and be stubborn, deny me your bed, but once we’re married we’ll sleep in the same bed every bloody night.”
He kissed her hard, the strength of his determination overwhelming her. Julian did love her. He did. He just didn’t know it yet. Or if he did, he was too stubborn to admit it.
A low growl rumbled in Julian’s chest as he swept her into his arms and carried her back to bed. She stared up at him; his heated gaze raised goose bumps on her flesh.
Her own gaze swept the length of him, held in thrall by the ripple of muscles over his magnificent body. The scars from his wounds did nothing to detract from his seductive allure. If anything, they made him more attractive. Her gaze shifted downward, to his rampant sex, and her breath hitched.
“Keep looking at me like that, sweeting,” Julian whispered thickly, “and I swear you’ll never leave this bed.”
His eyes glittered as he lowered himself to the bed. Just as he reached for her, someone rapped on the door. Seconds later, the door opened and Christy entered.
“I hope I didn’t awaken you, Lara,” Christy said. “I brought a plaid for you to wear over your shoulders. The castle can be drafty this time of the year and—oh …”
Julian groaned and dove for his breeches.
“I’m sorry,” Christy said. Her eyes sparkled with mirth. “I didn’t realize you had company. I’ll just leave the plaid on the bench.”
Lara went pink with embarrassment, but Julian appeared unflustered as he calmly stepped into his breeches.
“No need for you to leave, Christy,” Julian said once he was decently covered. “I should leave.” He glanced over at Lara. “We’ll continue this … conversation later.”
He gathered up his remaining clothing and let himself out of the chamber.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Christy apologized after Julian had left.
“I’m glad you did,” Lara replied. “As you observed, I have lit
tle willpower where Julian is concerned.”
“You should marry him,” Christy advised.
“Would you marry a man who didn’t love you? Lust is all good and well, but I want more.”
“I married a man I didn’t love,” Christy admitted. “In fact, I hated Sinjun the first time I set eyes on him. Of course I was but seven years old and my whole family except for my grandfather had been killed by Englishmen. I never counted on falling in love with Sinjun when I traveled to London to seduce him. Give Julian time to realize how much you mean to him. He’s determined to marry you, you know.”
“Humph,” Lara snorted.
“Think about it, Lara. Julian wouldn’t be so determined to marry you unless he loved you.”
“His honor—”
“Honor be damned,” Christy said. “Julian loves you. Marry him and put him out of his misery.”
Chapter 15
Lara locked her door against Julian that night and the next two nights, and was grateful that he hadn’t raised a ruckus. She wasn’t lying when she’d told Christy she had no willpower where Julian was concerned. Unfortunately, Lara knew that Julian would have his way, whether she liked it or not.
More worrisome was the lack of news about Emma and Lord Blakely. No one seemed to know a thing about them. They hadn’t been seen or heard from since they left London. Sinjun and Julian had mustered fifty clansmen and had spent two days searching for them.
Julian hadn’t mentioned marriage to her again after that first night when Christy had walked in on them, and that made Lara nervous. Knowing Julian, she suspected he had something up his sleeve. Something he’d probably spring on her when she least expected it.
The two-day search for Emma turned up no clue to her whereabouts. Everyone was understandably tense. That night Lara donned one of Christy’s dresses Mary had altered for her, tossed the plaid around her shoulders, and hurried downstairs to join the family for dinner. Everyone was gathered before the hearth in the hall.
“Oh, that dress is perfect on you,” Christy exclaimed. “Blue is definitely your color. And the plaid sets everything off beautifully.”