The Paternity Proposition

by Merline Lovelace

  Phoebe’s eyes widened in surprise. “Not at all. Ayanna was a great beauty. I don’t look anything like her.”

  How could he pretend to think she could even compare to Ayanna?

  “You have a lovely face,” he murmured, more to himself than her. “Your eyes are the color of the sea on a cloudless day, your skin is as soft as silk.”

  Phoebe felt heat flaring on her cheeks. Telling herself he wasn’t really complimenting her didn’t stop her from being embarrassed. She felt like some hick straight off the farm, with hay in her hair.

  She pulled back slightly so that he wasn’t touching her. “Yes, well, you’re very kind, but it’s hard to ignore facts. I’m too tall and too skinny. Half the time I think I look like a boy more than a grown woman. It’s fairly disheartening.”

  Mazin gazed at her. His dark eyes seemed able to see into her soul. “I would never mistake you for a boy.”

  She couldn’t look away. Her skin prickled as if she’d been in the sun too long. Maybe she had. Or maybe it was the island itself, weaving a magic spell around her.

  “Men don’t find me attractive,” she said bluntly, because she couldn’t think of anything else to say. “Or interesting.”

  “Not all men.”

  Was it her imagination, or had he just moved a little closer? And was it suddenly really hot?

  “Some men find you very attractive.”

  She would have sworn he didn’t actually say that last sentence, because his lips were too close to hers to be speaking. But she couldn’t ask, because she was in shock. Tremendous shock. She even stopped breathing, because at that moment he kissed her.

  Phoebe didn’t know what to think or do. One minute she’d been sitting on a rock by the ocean trying not to babble, and the next a very handsome, very sophisticated older man was kissing her. On the lips. Which, she supposed, was where most people kissed. Just not her. Not ever. In fact—

  Stop thinking!

  Her mind obeyed, going blank. It was only then that she realized his mouth was still on hers, which meant they were kissing. Which left her in the awkward position of having no clue as to what was expected of her.

  The contact teased, making her want to lean into him. She liked the feel of his lips against hers and the way he placed one hand on her shoulder. She felt the heat of his fingers and the way his breath brushed across her cheek. She could see the dark fan of his lashes and the hint of stubble on his cheek. He smelled like sunshine, only more masculine.

  Every part of her felt extra sensitive and her mouth trembled slightly.

  He broke the kiss and opened his eyes, making her think perhaps hers should have been closed.

  “You did not want me to do that,” he said quietly. She blinked several times. Not want her first kiss?

  Was he crazy? “No, it was great.”

  “But you didn’t respond.”

  Humiliation washed over her. Phoebe slid off the rock onto the sand, then reached for her shoes. Before she could grab them, Mazin was at her side. He took her hands in his and somehow compelled her to look at him.

  “What aren’t you telling me?” he asked.

  “Nothing.” Everything, she thought.

  “Phoebe.”

  He spoke in a warning tone that made her toes curl into the sand. She swallowed, then blurted the truth out all at once, or at least as much of it as she was willing to confess.

  “I don’t have a lot of experience with men. I never dated in high school, because I didn’t fit in. Then Ayanna got sick and I spent the four years nursing her. That didn’t leave time for a social life—not that I wanted one. The past six months I’ve been sad. So I’m not really good at the whole kissing thing.”

  She stopped talking and hoped he would buy her explanation without figuring out that no man had ever kissed her before.

  She waited for him to say something. And waited. A smile teased at the corners of his mouth. His dark expression softened slightly. Then he cupped her face in his large, strong hands.

  “I see,” he murmured before once again touching his lips to hers.

  It should have been the same kiss she’d just experienced. Weren’t they all the same? But somehow this felt different. More intense. Her eyes fluttered closed before she realized what had happened. Oddly, the darkness comforted her. Her brain shut down as well, which was nice because in the quiet she could actually feel the contact of skin on skin.

  He kissed her gently, yet with a hint of fire that left her breathless. Somehow she found the courage to kiss him back. Tiny electric tingles raced up and down her arms and legs, making her shiver. Mazin moved closer, until they were practically touching. He swept his thumbs across her cheeks, which made her want to part her lips. When she did, she felt the light brush of his tongue against hers.

  The contact was as delightful as it was unexpected. The tingles in her arms and legs turned into ripples and she found it difficult to stand. She had to hold on to him, so she rested her hands lightly on his shoulders. They were kissing. Really kissing.

  He stroked her lightly, circling her, exciting her. After a minute or so, she found the courage to do the same to him. Every aspect of the experience was amazing.

  Of course, she’d read about this in books and seen passionate kissing in the movies, but she’d never experienced it herself. It was glorious. No wonder teenagers were willing to do it for hours. She found herself wanting to do the same.

  She liked everything about it—the way he tasted, the scent of him, the heat flaring between them. Her body felt light, as if she could float away. When he released her face and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close, she knew there was nowhere else on earth she wanted to be.

  Their bodies touched. From shoulder to knee, they pressed together. She’d never been so close to a man, and was stunned to find every part of him was muscled and hard. She felt positively delicate by comparison.

  At last he drew back and rested his forehead against hers.

  “That was a surprise,” he said, his voice low and husky.

  “Did I do it wrong?” she asked before she could stop herself.

  He laughed. “No, my dove. You kissed exactly right. Perhaps too right.”

  Their breath mingled. Phoebe felt all squishy inside. She wanted to stay close to him forever, kissing until the world ended.

  Instead of reading her mind, Mazin straightened, then glanced at his watch.

  “Unfortunately, duty calls,” he said, then put his arm around her. “Come. I will see you back to your hotel.” She wanted to protest, but he’d already given her so much. In a single day she’d experienced more than she could ever have imagined.

  “You’ve been very kind,” she said, savoring the weight of his arm around her waist. He waited while she picked up her purse and shoes, then drew her close again.

  “The pleasure was mine.”

  Oh, please let him want to see me again.

  They walked to the car in silence. Once there, Mazin held open the passenger door.

  Phoebe told herself not to be disappointed. One day was enough. She could survive on these memories for a long time. But before she slid into the car, he caught her hand and brought it to his lips.

  “Tomorrow?” he asked in a whisper.

  “Yes,” she breathed in relief. “Tomorrow.”

  Four

  Phoebe stepped carefully along the stone path through the center of the botanical garden. A light rain had fallen early that morning, leaving all the plants clean and sweet smelling. Overhead tall trees blocked out most of the heat from the midday sun. It was a pretty darned perfect moment.

  “There are legends about ancient pirates coming to the island,” Mazin was saying. “Archaeologists haven’t found any evidence of raiders on the island, but the stories persist.” He smiled. “Children are warned that if they don’t behave, they’ll be taken from their beds in the middle of the night.”

  Phoebe laughed. “That should scare them into doing what they’re
supposed to.”

  “I’m not sure they actually believe in the ancient pirates.”

  “Did you?”

  He hesitated, then grinned. “Perhaps when I was very small.”

  She tried to imagine him as a little boy and could not. She glanced at his strong profile, wondering if his features had ever looked childish and soft. Her gaze lingered on his mouth. Had he really kissed her yesterday? It seemed more like a dream than something that had actually happened.

  The hem of her dress brushed against a bush growing out onto the path. Drops of water trickled onto her bare leg. She tugged on her short-sleeved jacket and knew that, dream or not, she had been foolish to put on a dress that morning. Slacks would have been more sensible.

  Only, she hadn’t been feeling very sensible. She’d wanted to look special for Mazin—pretty. As she didn’t wear makeup or know how to do anything fancy with her hair, a dress had been her only option. Now that she was with him, she hoped he didn’t realize she’d gone to any effort. Yesterday he had said kind things about her appearance, but she wasn’t sure she believed the compliments. Of course she’d had plenty of time to relive them last night, when she’d barely slept at all.

  “Are there other stories about the island?” she asked.

  “Several. Legend has it that when there is a lunar eclipse visible from Lucia-Serrat, there is magic in the air. Mysterious creatures are said to appear, and animals can talk.”

  “Really?”

  He shrugged. “I have no personal experience with talking animals.”

  A branch stretched across part of the path. Mazin took her arm and led her around the obstruction.

  His fingers were warm against her bare skin. Some time before dawn it had crossed her mind that he might be trying to seduce her. As she had no experience with the process, she couldn’t be sure. If he was, should she mind? Phoebe couldn’t decide.

  Her plan had always been to go to college and become a nurse. She knew little of love and less of marriage. For years she’d had the feeling both were going to pass her by—hence her education-career plan. She wanted to be prepared to take care of herself.

  But an affair was not marriage. She was on the island for only a few weeks. If Mazin offered to teach her the mysteries between a man and a woman, why on earth would she say no?

  They turned left at the next opportunity. Tall bamboo shared space with different kinds of bananas. Some were small, some large. Many were unfamiliar.

  “I’ve never seen anything like this,” she said as they paused next to a cluster of red bananas.

  “Florida is tropical,” he reminded her.

  “I know, but where I live it’s more suburban. There are some exotic plants, but nothing like this.”

  “You moved there when you were young, I believe?”

  She hesitated. “Yes.”

  “You do not have to speak of your past if you do not wish to.”

  “I appreciate that. I don’t have anything to hide.” They began walking again. Phoebe folded her arms over her chest. She didn’t mind talking about her life—she just didn’t want him to think she was some backwater hick.

  “I was born in Colorado. I never knew my father, and my mother didn’t speak of him. Her parents died before I was born. She did…” Phoebe hesitated, her gaze firmly fixed on the ground. “She didn’t like people very much. We lived in a small cabin in the middle of the woods. There weren’t any other people around and we never had contact with the outside world. There was no electricity or indoor plumbing. We got all of our water from a well.”

  She cast a quick glance at Mazin. He seemed interested. “I did not know there were parts of your country without such amenities.”

  “There are some. My mother taught me to read, but didn’t discuss much of the outside world with me. We were happy, I guess. I know she cared about me, but I was often lonely. One day when I was eight, we were out collecting berries. There was a lot of water from the spring snow runoff higher in the mountain. She slipped on some wet leaves, fell and hit her head. I found out later that she died instantly, but at the time I didn’t know why she wouldn’t wake up. After a few hours, I knew I had to go get help, even though she had always forbidden me to have anything to do with other people. There was a town about ten miles away. I’d stumbled across it a couple of times when I’d been out exploring.”

  Mazin stopped walking and grabbed her by her upper arms. “You had never been into the town before?”

  She shook her head.

  “You must have been terrified.”

  “I was more scared that there was something wrong with my mother, or that she was going to be mad when she woke up.” She sighed, remembering how she’d been trying so hard not to cry as she explained what had happened to several strangers before one of them finally took her to the sheriff’s office.

  “They went and got her,” she said. Mazin released her arms and she started walking. It seemed easier to keep moving as she talked. “Then they told me she was dead. I didn’t know what it meant for a long time.”

  “Where did you go?”

  “Into a temporary foster home until they could locate a relative. It took about six months, because I didn’t know anything about my family. They had to go through all of her personal effects to get leads. In the meantime I had to adjust to a life that everyone else took for granted. It was hard.”

  Those three words couldn’t possibly explain what it had been like, Phoebe thought. She still remembered her shock the first time she’d seen an indoor bathroom. The toilet had stunned her, while the idea of hot running water on demand had been a taste of heaven.

  “I started school, of course,” she said.

  “You must have had difficulties.”

  “Just a couple. I knew how to read, but I’d had no education. Math was a mystery to me. I knew my numbers, but nothing else. Plus I’d missed all the socialization that most children undergo. I didn’t know how to make friends, and I’d never seen a television, let alone a movie.”

  “Your mother had no right to do that to you.”

  She glanced at him, surprised by the fierceness in his voice. “She did what she thought was best. Sometimes I think I understand, other times I’m angry.”

  They stepped into the sun and Phoebe was grateful for the warmth.

  They walked in silence for several minutes. There were things about her past that she’d never admitted to anyone, not even Ayanna. Her aunt had been so kind and supportive from the first that she hadn’t wanted to trouble her.

  “I didn’t make friends easily,” Phoebe whispered. “I didn’t know how. The other children knew I was different and they stayed away from me. I was grateful when they found my aunt, not only to have a home, but to get away from the loneliness.”

  Mazin led her to a bench on the side of the path. She settled in a corner, her hands clasped tightly together, the memories growing larger in her mind.

  “Ayanna drove out to get me. Later she told me it was because she thought the car trip would give us time to get to know each other.” She smiled sadly. “Her plan worked. By the time we reached Florida, I was comfortable with her. And I did a little better making friends. I’d learned from previous mistakes. Unfortunately, I had more trouble in school. For a while the teachers were convinced I was retarded. I couldn’t even score well on the IQ tests because I didn’t have the frame of reference to answer the questions.”

  “Yet you were successful.”

  She nodded. “It took a long time. Ayanna took me to the library every week and helped me pick out different books so that I could learn about things. It’s the little things, like knowing that the word pipe has two meanings.”

  She suddenly realized how long she’d been talking, and groaned. “I’m sorry. I don’t even remember what you asked me. I know you couldn’t have wanted this long answer.”

  “I’m happy to hear about your past,” Mazin told her, lightly touching the back of her hand. “I am impressed by your abili
ty to overcome a disadvantage.”

  She supposed his answer should have pleased her, but it didn’t. She wanted him to see her as someone he could find exciting, not as an example of a job well done. She wanted him to take her in his arms again and kiss her thoroughly.

  With a fierceness that both shocked and frightened her, she found herself wishing that he did want to seduce her.

  But instead of kissing her or even holding her close, he rose.

  Reluctantly she got to her feet.

  They continued to walk through the garden. Mazin was a most attentive host, pointing out plants of interest, inquiring about her state of well-being in the hot morning. As the sun rose in the sky, her spirits plummeted. She shouldn’t have told him about her strange upbringing. She shouldn’t have spilled her secrets. How could he think of her as anything but odd?

  “You have grown silent,” Mazin said when he realized Phoebe had stopped talking.

  She shrugged.

  He took in the slump of her shoulders and the way her fingers endlessly pleated her skirt. “Why are you sad?”

  “I’m not. I just feel…” She pressed her lips together. “I don’t want you to think I’m stupid.”

  “Why would I think that?”

  “Because of what I told you.”

  She had told him about her past. From his perspective, the information had only made her more dangerous. Yesterday she had been a pretty woman who attracted him sexually. Their kiss had shown him the possibilities and the accompanying arousal had disturbed his sleep. Today he knew that she was more than an appealing body. He knew that she had a strong spirit and that she had succeeded against impossible odds. Why would that make him think she was stupid?

  Women were complex creatures.

  “Put it from your mind, my dove,” he told her, taking her hand in his. “I admire your ability to overcome your past. Come, I will show your our English rose garden. Some of the rosebushes are very ancient, and still annoyed to find themselves so far from home.”

  The next morning Phoebe had almost convinced herself that Mazin meant what he said—that he admired her for her past. However, she couldn’t quite embrace the concept, mostly because he hadn’t kissed her goodbye. He’d kissed her on the first day, but not on the second. Didn’t that mean they were moving in the wrong direction?