She clung to him, returning his kiss as she’d learned from their previous encounter, arms stealing around his neck while the cloak remained crushed between them, her mouth opening to give him full access. Jamie pushed a hand between them and yanked the cloak away so that it fell to their feet. He cupped one breast, widened his fingers to circle it, her nipple pressed against his palm. Sliding his hand downward, his fingers grazed her nipple, teasing the bud into a peak. He lifted his head, watching her sigh a shaky little breath of air, enjoying the sight of her face alight with stirrings of passion, her lids closed, eyebrows arched expectantly, her features completely without tension. Jamie glanced down at her breasts; they were perfect, as perfect as he imagined all of Ada would soon prove to be. Full and milky white, her rosy nipples pointed around two circles of pink.
But Jamie’s heart nearly broke at the sight of the thin white marks that crisscrossed so much of the skin of her beautiful breasts. And above them, a foot long scar ran from right to left, just above the top of the globes. His nostrils flared, while he fought back a rage so brutal it curled his fingers into her flesh.
Ada gasped and opened her eyes, saw what held his attention. Every inch of her stiffened, and then all at once went completely limp. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I—I should have...” her voice trailed off.
He couldn’t remember the last time he cried, or if he ever had. But he recognized the feeling of it, the threat of tears; his throat tightened, and his jaw clenched; heat pooled in his cheeks and nose and mouth while his eyes watered.
He leaned his forehead against hers, his fingers dug into her hips, pulling her against him. “Do no ever say you’re sorry to me. No ever again.”
He kissed her savagely then, so much fury inside him, so much he needed her to know, to understand. She apologized to him! He was the sorry one! He was to blame. How could she even stand to look at him? Jesu, how could she kiss him? His mouth covered hers hungrily, devouring her softness, her willingness.
Ah, but damn her soul, it was wrong. Jamie halted, his lips hovering just near hers. “Why do you let me kiss you? Strike me,” he growled, “or curse me. Smite me, even. But I dinna deserve your kiss.”
Softly, she breathed against his mouth, “I did strike you, and oh, how I cursed you.” And then, the part of her that was beyond brave, that both terrified and awed him, said, “And now that’s done. I far prefer the kissing.”
Ada confirmed this by touching her lips to his, boldly tracing the seam of his lips with her tongue. It was ridiculously easy, selfishly satisfying, to give in to her untutored attempt to coax his mouth open. But he waited, curious as to the extent of her daring—or was it only her desire to assuage his guilt? Whatever it was, she did not disappoint. Her wet tongue speared into his mouth, seeking his, curling around it with enough unpracticed fervor that Jamie’s cock’s sprang further to life.
Understanding—and gladly so—that he wasn’t doing anything she didn’t want him to do, Jamie took control once again. With great reverence, he lowered his head and touched his lips to her breasts while Ada drew a sharp and startled breath, her hands clasping his head, her fingers curling into his hair. He showered first one, then the other nipple with attention, until both were hard, and she was all but sagging against him. He grabbed her close against him, chest to chest, watching her eyes pop open at the feel of this, as he rubbed his own naked chest tortuously against her breasts. As frantically as an untried youth, he fumbled with the ties to his breeches, dropping them to the ground.
Jamie straightened and stood before her, both of them naked, separated now by several feet. She swallowed and her shy gaze left his to look upon him, her lips rolling in as she confronted his erection, which only lengthened with her innocent but curious perusal.
Jamie was not at all immune to the sight of her. Her legs were long and lean, and he pictured them wrapped around him while he pressed into that triangle between. Her belly was flat, untouched by the violence John Craig had visited upon her. Her arms, it came as no surprise, were thin and toned, and those magnificent breasts sat perfectly upon her, being neither too large nor too small, but perfectly shaped.
Jamie took one step forward and lifted her hand to place it on his chest. Briefly, she’d met his eyes again, aroused as well as curious now, he fathomed, before she shifted her gaze again to his chest. Jamie held her hand even as she splayed her fingers wide and discovered him. Her breathing increased. She moved the tip of one finger over his nipple, the touch so sensational he flexed, bringing her eyes back to his. He allowed the slightest hint of a grin to encourage her, though imagined it must appear pained, with the restraint it required to not pull her violently against him. She traced a long thick cut line where it began near his nipple and followed its path up past his shoulder. Ada stepped closer and pressed her lips to one part of that old scar.
Jamie sighed, and with a hand at each of her hips, he lowered himself to his knees, pulling Ada along with him. He guided her onto her back, onto her fallen cloak. coming over her, his mouth low, touching first her navel. His tongue tasted her skin, warm and soft. Moving upward, leaving a trail of kisses along the way, he captured one nipple, holding himself up with a hand on either side of her, while he pinched her nipple between his teeth. Ada cried out, the sound wispy and needful, and Jamie fought valiantly against the urge to couple with her as hard and urgently as his need demanded.
He stretched out his legs beside hers and lifted his face to hers. Her eyes were liquid with passion, her lips swollen and parted. Jamie touched his mouth to hers, back and forth, inserting his tongue, playing against hers. He trailed kisses down her throat, back to her breast, running his fingers along her thigh, first outside then inside. She went still, her fingernails digging into his shoulder. He joined their lips again and reached between her thighs, into the dark curls, teasing her hot flesh.
"Oh," she moaned, and instinctively tried to close her legs. Jamie followed, persistent, knowing more than she what she desired. But he needed to be gentle, to go slow, and that was becoming more and more unrealistic. Lifting his head, he watched her; her back was arched, her eyes were closed, hair haloed about her head, her body bared to him. Pale and soft, with a lean but voluptuous figure he'd not entirely been prepared for, Jamie wondered if he was indeed capable of reining himself in, keeping the pace unhurried, unthreatening for her.
He sought her lips, closing his eyes, tasting her, his fingers still about their play, wandering inward, filling her. Ada cried out, a bit shocked at this foray. Her sigh then, as she settled against him, was a bit dreamy as she became accustomed to the motion of his fingers. After a moment, as her need increased, she began to move herself against him. Her hands left his hair, thin fingers inflaming his own rampant need with a southern trail, down his back, onto his hips.
“I want to touch you,” she murmured. And because her hands already had sampled so much of him, he knew specifically what she meant. He reached for the hand in his hair and guided it between them, showing her how to wrap her fingers around him. An unintelligible sound escaped him; he held his breath, but dared to demonstrate, with his hand covering hers, how she should move. She did so, with aching slowness, that Jamie deemed it wise to leave off teaching her more in this regard. He could only stand so much and did so only until he sensed she was comfortable, though he most certainly was not.
“No more lass,” he instructed, pulling her hand away. “A man can only take so much.”
He applied himself to making sure she was wet for him, sliding his hand again between her legs, teasing her nub, and entering her again.
Their lips met again, hungrier, more urgent, the rhythm increasing. And when her breaths became steadily audible, little gasps of wonder while his fingers moved inside her, Jamie pulled back, eliciting a startled, unhappy cry. But this was replaced by a husky moan as he shifted and came on top of her. Her legs naturally fell open and Jamie settled between them. With his forearms on either side of her head, his fingers in her ha
ir, he met her eyes, telling her how truly thankful he was for this. And then she enflamed him by saying, “I like the way your body feels against mine, skin to skin.”
An answering sound emerged, and he kissed her lingeringly, touching his penis to where she throbbed for him. "I canna lie, lass. I’ve been thinking about this every day upon that blessed horse, and each night when you lie next to me." He pushed forward fractionally, opening her.
Ada moaned. "This is desire, then,” she surmised.
"Aye, and mountains of it."
“I like it,” she said, ever honest. “I shouldn’t, I think. But I do.”
Relief and excitement flooded him at once. Slowly, he entered her, controlling the urge to thrust himself inside her and take her hard. She was tight, closing around him, giving great torment. He put his palms onto the ground and rose above her, every muscle strained with the effort to proceed slowly. He reached the barrier of her innocence. And froze. Not for one damn second had he imagined he would encounter this. Honest to God, he’d just expected the loss of this was one more gruesome offense she’s surely suffered. Relief, and then guilt, battled within.
But he could no more stop now that he could bring his own heartbeat to a halt. He'd no plans to warn her of the pain, she was too immersed in her own want and needn't know the price for bliss. Expertly, he kissed her until she was more at ease with the invasion thus far and then pushed himself through, swallowing her cry of distress, stopping completely.
"Do no move," he cautioned, forehead to forehead.
"Something went wrong," she said, her brow furrowed, her eyes shiny.
A chuckle escaped at this. "No, lass. A perfect fit."
He ached to move and did so in small, leisurely increments. He grabbed her hips to show her the motion and she matched his pace but soon her quickening demanded that he move faster. In and out. Blood rushed to every corner of his body. He knew when she neared orgasm for her body lifted, her eyes lighting on him with some beautiful question.
Jamie pulled out, ignoring her cry. He sat on his knees and brought her up with him to sit upon him, catching her amazed expression. Now face to face, he lifted her hips and brought her down again, settling his cock once again inside her. Their eyes locked as they moved and panted. Ada gripped his shoulders, finding the rhythm again while Jamie took both her breasts in his hands, his thumbs stirring her nipples.
He watched her bite her bottom lip and arch her neck, her movements more frenzied. "Ah, lass, come with me."
"I...I need..."
"I ken what you need, Ada. Let it come."
And she did. Before his eyes, just as his own ecstasy was about to burst upon him, she climaxed, shivering with delight, her nails digging into his skin. She brought her eyes back to his, bright with excitement, her face then telling him this was quite unexpected. She pressed her mouth to his, capturing his outcry as he exploded inside her.
Filled with the feel of Ada, the taste of her, the scent of sex, he closed his eyes, shuddering with pleasure. Against her lips, "Jesus bloody Christ." It ravaged him, spiraling throughout his body, firing his blood. Jamie fought to steady himself, his breathing. Spent now, with Ada coming down around him, he held her tight, enjoying still the feel of her breasts crushed against him.
Eventually, when he could move again, he lowered her onto her back again, lying himself atop her. Her hands were in his hair again, pulling the long hair away from his face. Finally, Jamie opened his eyes.
She was watching him, her face now utterly unsure. Of how to act. How to proceed. How to express herself.
Jamie kissed her. Tenderly. "You are beautiful, Ada." Shifting just a bit, he slipped to the side, but remained half lying atop her, kept his face buried at her neck.
“If I’d known what it was,” she said into his hair, her voice seeming to float, “if I’d had any idea...I’d have been thinking about this for the last few days as well.”
Jamie chuckled against her before lifting his head. “And now, lass, when we bed down tonight, or when we ride again tomorrow...?” She was already nodding her head against the ground beneath her that he needn’t finish the question. “Aye, me too. More so, like as no.”
ADA CLOSED HER EYES, nearly trampled by the sentiments raging through her now. She dug into them but could find no remorse. It should be there, she felt. Quite easily, though they were new, she recognized the physical reactions, the now waning passion, the tingling in all of her limbs, the heat coursing still through her, that particular fullness and throbbing at her woman’s place. But while her emotions just now were a jumble, she could barely decipher any negative. Surely that must follow what they had just done, shouldn’t it?
“I dinna want to move,” Jamie said against her shoulder, “but we must.”
He removed his body from hers and Ada waited for the embarrassment to come, as he stretched his hand down to her and brought her to her feet. It didn’t, though. Instead, only a need to look and touch and know more of him filled her. She reached out her hand, his chest its destination. Her fingertips had barely grazed him, and she’d received only the beginnings of a lifted brow and lazy, satisfied grin from him when Will crashed down onto the beach. This meant Wallace and Roger had returned from hunting, as the hound had accompanied them.
Ada’s eyes widened. Jamie bent down and grabbed her cloak, shoving it at her, and steered her back into the brush where her clothes were hidden. He had only his breeches to don and did so hastily, just as Will reached him and pranced around, sniffing the very ground where Ada and Jamie had lain only moments ago.
Ada dressed hurriedly, happy to be wearing clean clothes again, and stepped out to find Jamie waiting for her. She’d have thought he might have returned to the camp, to at least give the impression that they hadn’t been bathing together, as their hair was damp yet. But he’d waited, and Ada decided if Jamie weren’t concerned with the impropriety, she wouldn’t be either.
He yanked his sword from where he’d thrust it into the ground and they walked along the bank, Ada clutching the bundle of soiled clothes to her belly.
“They’re going to know,” she lamented, “for I fear I won’t be able to hide it from my face.” Her entire person must look different, she imagined. How could a person just be party to that most miraculous thing as she just had, and not have it clearly written all over their face?
Jamie stopped and considered her, head to toe, his gaze rather raking and suggesting he liked very much what he saw, or was seeing it again minus her garments. “Aye, they’re no idiots. We shouldn’t pretend they are. But, lass, we’ll keep our hands to ourselves while keeping company, aye?”
She smiled at this. She’d done a very bold thing with Jamie MacKenna just now, made even more audacious for her lack of regret, but she didn’t suppose she was some hussy to be openly fondling him. Yet, “Best find a tunic then, sir, and remove the temptation.”
He chuckled at this and kissed her fleetingly.
WILLIAM WALLACE DID indeed have an idea what had transpired between Jamie and Ada, if Ada read correctly his unusually persistent grin, which he happened to focus more on Jamie than her. But Ada was truly unperturbed. The world could end tomorrow, and well it might, but she had this. She cared not that her future was still uncertain, cared not that she was, for all intents and purposes, a ruined woman. Her history and her scars made the latter so trivial a matter, and Torren’s mantra, your life now can and will be whatever you decide to make of it, repeated often to herself, reduced the amount of worry she invested in the former.
And when they eventually settled down for the night around the dwindling fire, and Jamie pulled her into his arms, his chest pressed against her back, his breath warm against her hair, Ada knew a sense of hope she’d not entertained in years. Entwining her fingers with his at her waist, she considered that she’d certainly not had an unpleasant life, prior to Dornoch. True, it had been rather hum-drum, Ada ever imbued with a sense of waiting for something to happen, for life to come to her. But sh
e had never, she concluded, entertained as much hope as she did now, certainly not a hint since Dornoch—hope that she was entitled to happiness, hope that something good could be hers. And the beauty of it was that it wasn’t specifically or necessarily attached outright to Jamie MacKenna. While she was quite obviously attracted to him, and intrigued by him, she’d only just realized that he’d only shown her that joy was something she could know again.
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Came his whisper at her ear.
Ada grinned into the darkness, and returned in a matching low voice, “I only met that tone in your voice today, but I’m sure I do know what you are thinking. I’m sorry to say, my thoughts were more... cerebral.”
There was a smile in his voice, “Have I taught you nothing, lass?”
“There’s more?” She teased.
Jamie pressed himself against her bottom and Ada’s eyes widened at the hardness she now recognized. Immediately, a heat pooled between her legs. She held herself very still, even as her breathing quickened, not sure if responding or encouraging him was the right thing to do with William Wallace and Roger so closely situated.
And, in her frank manner, she wondered, with her head turned back toward him, “Is it your intent to dangle a temptation before me, one that I cannot enjoy presently?”
His hand slipped away from hers at her middle and rose to slide over her breast, lifting the fullness of it. “What’s no to enjoy, lass?”
Thus fascinated, Ada blew out a breath and rather innocently wiggled her bum against him.
“Aye, and now, you trot out your own enticement?”
“’Tis only fair,” she said, covering the hand at her breast with her own, willing him to stop. It wasn’t fair at all, actually, to tease her so.
Jamie went still. Several minutes passed.
And then he murmured at her ear, “We’ll get to MacBriar’s tomorrow, lass. I had an idea we might find a cleric to see us wed.”
The Shadow 0f Her Smile (Highlander Heroes Book 3) Page 14