Then Lord Cumpterton scoffed. “Don’t pretend you weren’t glad to have me out of your hair for a month at a time.” He turned to Leo and whispered, “Believe me, I know the truth.” He winked.
Leo chuckled and looked down at Madison while her parents continued on in their own world. They were standing close. He had to tilt his head down to look at her.
Her upturned face was the portrait of peace. She was watching her parents. Her eyes displayed bittersweet longing. Was she thinking about Matthew and what they used to have? Had she and Lord Hivers once upon a time been just as hopelessly in love?
Madison suddenly moved her gaze to him. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Why didn’t I tell you that I slept through most of your father’s course? It’s not the best way to impress someone.”
She fought a smile, but her cheeks were pink. “Did you pass?”
Instead of giving her a straight reply, he turned to Lord Cumpterton. “Might I suggest my sleeping through your class an expression of my studies and agreement with the views of Mr. Locke?”
The professor lifted his brow, telling Leo to proceed.
“Locke believed that we were all born with a blank slate—”
“Blank slate, which is also known as…” Cumpterton cut in.
Leo smiled. Cumpterton enjoyed tripping people up. “Tabula rasa, and that knowledge comes through the senses.”
“Like touch,” Madison cut in, clearly recalling their conversation from earlier.
He nodded. “Exactly. “We are all different, separate individuals with our own ideas and thought processes.”
“And so?” the professor asked.
“So, what may seem like laziness to you may simply be greatness at work to someone else.”
“That someone being you,” Madison whispered.
He chuckled and nodded.
“Libertine!” Cumpterton cried in the same fashion he’d done it so many years ago. “Lord Leonard Childs is very brilliant.” He took Leo by the shoulder.
Leo stiffened at the touch but fought to keep the smile on his face. He did not like being touched.
But the earl didn’t seem to notice as he turned to Madison. “He could outthink half the class. So, I say, though he was sleeping, his mind was grasping everything I ever said.” Then he straightened as he turned to Leo. “I take great pride in your intelligence.”
No one had ever taken pride in Leo’s education, only his cold cruelty and only his father.
Leo’s uneasiness grew until Cumpterton’s hand fell away.
Madison and her father immediately struck up a conversation about Immanuel Kant and David Hume. Both their theories had been based on Locke. Madison’s exuberance on the topic fascinated Leo.
Her mind was extraordinary.
“Tea?” Lady Cumpterton asked sometime later. Then she began to fuss over Madison for standing for so long.
Leo sat away from the family, trying to give Madison some privacy though remembering to keep his word to Matthew. But the Lord and Lady Cumpterton would not allow it. They pulled him into the conversation and then Lord Cumpterton demanded he move closer.
The closest seat in the room was next to Madison.
He kept some distance between them and caught the few times she glanced at him. There was a question in her eyes and he got the impression that she not only expected answers but planned to get them. He didn’t like her confidence. Somewhere in the last hour, he’d lost power in the dynamic of their relationship and he needed to establish it once again.
Lady Cumpterton placed her hand on Madison’s stomach, and Leo watched as her daughter cringed at her mother’s touch. Did she not want her mother touching her? Was she like Leo and simply hated the touch of others? That couldn’t be it. Lady Cumpterton had been touching her all day and Madison had been fine.
Was it her appearance that caused her grief. Why? Did she think her tender state made her unattractive? It didn’t.
Leo doubted he’d ever have an affair with a pregnant woman, but he found nothing about that time of their life ghastly to behold. He kept away from them for more personal reasons.
Did Matthew find her unattractive in this state?
Or was it something else?
Leo’s mother came to mind. She’d never been very motherly from what Leo could recall.
“Are you eating well?” Lady Cumpterton asked.
“Yes,” Madison replied with a strained smile.
“It’s a tragedy what happened to Lady Anson,” Lord Cumpterton said to Madison. Then he turned to Leo. “She lost her husband, nearly lost her son as well. It was a carriage accident.”
Leo didn’t know what to say to that.
Lady Cumpterton tsked. “It’s dreadful business, death. It seems everyone around us is dying. The last two years have seen many accidents.”
A hesitant look crossed Madison’s face before she stood. “I need to be excused.” She left.
And Leo was right on her heels. “So do I, terribly actually. I’ll wait until she’d done.” He stepped out of the room, caught a glimpse of her skirts, and followed.
She slipped into a room, and Leo let his eyes take in the space before Madison tried to shut the door.
He stuck a hand out. “There’s no chamber pot in here.”
She gasped. “No. you’re right. It’s my room, so if you’ll excuse me…” She tried to close the door.
“Madison, do not fight me. You are no match for my strength.” It wasn’t an arrogant statement. She was pregnant, and he didn’t want her placing unnecessary force on her body.
“Is it the deaths that are bothering you?” He understood why Matthew wished to keep her protected.
“It is not the deaths.” She stopped pushing. “I just want to be alone. Can I not have a single moment alone?”
“You can. At home with Matthew, but while you are here, I am to watch over you.” He lowered his voice. “If seeing me as a bodyguard is too much for you, then think of me as your guardian angel.”
“Please,” she begged. “Just five minutes.”
“No.”
“Two minutes.”
“Not even a second.”
She glared and lowered her voice. “And what if I’d actually gone into the facilities? Would you have followed me in there?”
“Yes.”
She smirked. “And what would you have said to my parents had they caught you with me?”
He leaned on the doorpost. “I’d have told them that I heard what I thought was a moan of discomfort and went in to see if you were all right.”
She tilted her head in the same direction as his. At the same time, she moved closer and he wondered if she was aware of her actions. “You studied philosophy. What sort of assistance do you believe you could offer me?” She cut him off with a hand. “Actually, why not take a lesson from the great John Locke and give me some freedom?”
Clever girl. “That’s not up to me.”
“But it is. As you stated earlier, you are an independent thinker. So, use your senses.” She straightened. “Look at me and calculate the likelihood that I’ll do something dangerous while left alone, especially considering that I am often alone at Matthew’s house.”
She was often alone? Leo swore he’d seen a footman following her to and from the drawing room, though he’d kept himself at a distance.
Call it suspicion, but something felt… off about Madison at the moment. She’d been hesitant before she’d left the drawing room and now he knew she’d been lying about her destination.
She was clever. Brilliant.
But so was he.
“I’m ready to ask my question,” he said. “Answer it truthfully, and I’ll give you one minute.”
She stiffened, but he read her expression and knew he had her permission to ask his question.
“Do you love your baby?” He had no idea what made him ask that. Actually, he had a sinking suspicion that Madison would rather not be carrying a child.
He wondered if his own mother had thought the same. How many times had she stepped in to stop their father’s growing madness and mistreatment? Never.
Madison didn’t answer. Neither did her expression change. But when she let the door go and then proceeded to walk past him, he feared he had his answer.
“It should have been a simple question. It should have a simple answer, my lady.”
She looked back at him and nodded. Pain fluttered in her eyes, but then she blinked it away. “I agree, my lord. It should have been a simple question.”
But it wasn’t, was it?
She didn’t give him a chance to ask. She returned to her parents quickly and Leo decided to remain back. Returning at the same time would seem suspicious.
Yet, since he was here...
He took the liberty to search out her room once she was out of sight, making sure to close the door in case a servant walked back. Lady Madison had a secret, and Leo was not new to discovering someone’s truth. He would never torture her for the answers he wanted, but his years of studying people—along with some light assassin work and his knack for investigation—had made him a master of his craft.
He looked around the room. Had he not brought Lady Madison over and seen the way she glowed around her parents, he’d have questioned whether this room truly belonged to her.
The room had soft shades of rose in lively patterns.
He felt old standing in her space and for the first time ever, Leo thought he was invading someone’s private space. Technically, he was, but that had never troubled him before.
It wasn’t long before he found himself flipping through a stack of sheet music. The girl cared greatly for her music.
A letter fell out, and he opened it.
∫ ∫ ∫
1 2
* * *
Madison noticed there was something different about Lord Leo upon his return to her parents’ drawing room. The temperature seemed to drop. Though he wore a smile, she could feel the lack of humanity behind it. There was nothing stiff in his movements, and he easily slipped back into the conversation.
But when their eyes met… Nothing.
Was it just her who’d begun to feel some sort of connection between them? He’d been a student of her father’s. He knew her brother Morgan. Her family seemed to like him and though they liked most people—including Matthew—Madison could tell that her father really liked Leo.
When they got up to leave, he proved her thoughts. “Leo, you must come in and teach a class. You must. I won’t take no for an answer.”
Leo seemed surprised. Cause off guard, some of the warmth returned to his eyes. “Well, since you won’t take no for an answer—”
“Excellent.” Her father patted his shoulder. “Come back tomorrow and see if you can bring Madison again.” Thanks to Matthew, she rarely got to come. He found any excuse to make her miserable.
Leo’s smile was tight as he nodded and led Madison to the door. Before they crossed over the threshold, he said, “Oh, wasn’t there something you wished to grab from your room before we left? You should hurry and do so.”
Madison’s eyes widened, and she wanted to ask Leo what had changed his mind but couldn’t in front of her family. So instead, she offered him a sincere smile before turning away.
In her room, she opened a stack of blank music sheets and her banknote fell out. She pocketed the money and then decided to take the music sheets as well. As a gift to Leo, she’d write out the notes to her song so that he could take it with him when he left.
And hopefully, she’d be right behind him. But of course, she’d be going her own way.
She said goodbye to her parents and was quite pleased when the carriage pulled away. It was getting late. The sun was gone, but it was always fleeting during winter. They’d make it just in time for dinner.
“My father seemed happy to see you,” Madison said. “He didn’t even question your presence. He likely thought you came to surprise him and not as my bodyguard.”
“Hm,” he replied. Sometime later, he asked, “What’s that you have?” They were both in darkness, but for some reason, it seemed to engulf him. His voice was different. Distant in a strange way.
“Music sheets. The lines have yet to be filled in.”
“Are you planning to fill them in yourself?” Though she was sure he wanted to know, his voice made him sound uninterested.
“I am.”
“Have you a name for your song?” he asked.
“No.”
“Might I offer some suggestions?”
She shrugged and found herself stiffening in an effort not to lean away. What was going on?
“Can you turn on the lamp, please? I can’t see you.”
The light by the door flickered on a moment later and Madison flew back until she hit her seat. Leo was leaned forward. His elbows were on his knees. His face was close and his eyes were hard. “How about ‘Betrayal?’”
“What?” She could feel her heart fighting for its every beat. Fear coursed through her.
“The name of the song. ‘Betrayal.’ It is fitting, don’t you think?” he asked.
Actually, she thought it was fitting. Matthew had betrayed his friend, was still betraying Judd by taking his heir. But Leo didn’t know what. So why…?
Perhaps, he meant she was betraying her baby by not claiming to love it. That would explain why he was so different with her. Guilt rested heavy on her shoulders.
His eyes widened, and he shook his head. “I thought you a woman of high morals, but now I see the truth. It’s me you didn’t want.”
“What?”
“But had I been your beloved Judd, you’ve have flirted back with me today, wouldn’t you?”
Her mouth fell open. “What?”
“It’s no wonder Matthew despises you, why he struggles with his old fondness for Judd.” Leo frowned and leaned away. “You fell in love with your husband’s best friend.” He looked her over and the disgust was clear. “And you’re upset that you carry his baby.”
Madison lifted her hand to touch her stomach but then set it down. She wanted to tell Leo that he didn’t know her and his words were far from the truth. In fact, his thoughts were so far from the truth that they’d be laughable if he weren’t looking at her as though he were ready to break her neck on Matthew’s behalf.
She didn’t know his connection to Matthew. Why was Leo so angry for him?
Leo ran his hands through his hair. His face relaxed and he sighed. “Honestly, it’s no wonder Matthew leaves you so alone as you claim. I’d do the same if I didn’t need answers from you.”
After weeks of pushing her emotions into a small chest in the farthest reaches of her mind, this stranger had managed to get her to feel… pain. Hurt. Which was odd, because she hadn’t thought she’d given him that much power.
It must have been the way her father seemed to trust him. She’d always loved her father and believed his judgment sound. He liked Leo and so Madison had thought perhaps there was more to him. She’d wanted to know the boy he’d been all those years ago. The one who slept in class but was hiding an intricate mind behind those lids.
She didn’t care to know him at all now. All she wanted was him out of her life. She set the sheets on the side and turned to him. “Well, I see no reason we should continue to try and be friends. What’s your question?”
When he spoke, his voice was incredulous. “Have you no defense for yourself?”
She had no defense, because defending herself wasn’t an option. She could never tell anyone the truth, not until she got to Van Dero.
If she got to him.
Thankfully, she had the money to see it done.
“Is that your question? Because if it is, I plan to ask one of my own afterward.” She kept her eyes locked with his and refused to back down.
He wouldn’t hurt her, not physically and not emotionally, not ever again. She had the protection of a titled lord and the baby who depended on her eve
ry beating heart.
Leo didn’t even react to her fear. He lunged toward her. His eyes were the emptiest she’d ever seen them. “I was kind to you because I thought you innocent, but now that I know you are a traitorous woman, we’re going to start doing things my way.”
She swallowed and fought to slow her heart. She glared at him, hating him.
His gaze fell and she realized what he was looking at. Though she faced him, she had her body turned away. Both arms were wrapped around her belly.
She was protecting the baby. Leo had jumped at her and her first response had been to protect the thing in her stomach. She hadn’t thought before she acted, she’d just done it. Instinct, some would call it. She’d thought she’d suppressed such things but apparently not.
She was angry again, angry that she could even feel fear.
His eyes rose to hers again. “I’ll ask the questions and you’ll answer them. Do you understand?”
“Or what?”
He sighed. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t hurt me. I’m pregnant.”
His smirked and the expression was cruel. “Once again, you think that baby gives you power over me, but it doesn’t.”
“It’s not the baby,” she whispered. “It’s your conscience. Would you really hurt a woman who is carrying an innocent child?”
The loathing look he gave her made her cringe. “I see. The baby is only convenient when it serves your purpose.”
She laughed at that. “And is it not the same for men? All they care about is their bloodlines. They want someone to inherit their names, to represent them after they die as though it would matter to anyone. Men are hardly better.”
“Perhaps,” he agreed. “Those men you mention exist, but I know mothers who make their way in life on their backs and even they have done better than you. Congratulations. You’ve ruined your child, and he’s yet taken his first breath.”
That hurt.
Her eyes watered. “You don’t know anything…” The words were said softly, so quietly she wasn’t sure if he could hear them.
“What don’t I know? Tell me.” He spoke just as low and just as soft.
Madison pulled in a breath. His eyes went to her belly again. She was stroking her hand over her belly. She’d hadn’t done it in months. She stopped immediately and dropped her hands.
The Long Awaited Lord Page 6