“Destroyed me,” Kyle raises his glass shakily to his lips, spilling most of the alcohol all over his shirt. Adam, kind person that he is, takes the glass from him and replaces it with water. Which Kyle proceeds to once again spill all over his shirt.
Well, at least his shirt’s probably clean.
“You know, Adam, I kinda hate you,” Kyle says, as he absently tries to squeeze the liquid out of the t-shirt.
“I hadn’t noticed.”
“I’m pretty subtle,” Kyle agrees, because drunk Kyle is much more docile than sober Kyle but is equally delusional.
“Sure.”
“But, you’re pretty good at what you do. So, I hate you more.”
“Makes sense. You’re not too shabby yourself.”
“Nah, I’m fucking great,” Kyle abandons his t-shirt and grasps at the new water glass Adam gave him. “I’m never going to forgive you for what you did, you know.”
Adam winces. “That’s fair. I promise I won’t do stupid shit like that again.”
Kyle squints at him. Whether it’s because he’s trying to figure out if Adam is lying or because he’s starting to see two of Adam, Adam’s not sure. He’s guessing it’s the latter, though, since he doubts Kyle has enough perceptive ability to read someone. “Yeah, you won’t. You’ve been a little different lately, almost a new person. It’s disgusting,” he scoffs. “I never thought I’d see the day you’d voluntarily give up the bigger role. Guess even assholes change.”
“Takes one to know one,” Adam retorts, because really, they might be playing nice now, but he doesn’t think they’ll ever be friends.
Kyle opens his mouth, then pales, clutching his stomach. Adam scoots back in his chair, afraid Kyle is about to throw up. Instead, the man burps loudly, looking much too satisfied as he does so. Then, he staggers to his feet, grasping the chair as he does. Absently, he pats Adam on the head and stumbles away.
Motherfucker. Adam scowls at him, but doesn’t have much time to think it over, as someone takes his place. He looks up, ready to complain to Charlie or Grace.
When he sees Shane, his mouth goes dry.
“Hi.”
“Hi,” Adam does a quick glance over the cast. “What happened to Violet?”
“I called her a cab, and sent her home,” he leans forward, as if he’s revealing a huge secret. “She doesn’t hold her alcohol well.”
“I couldn’t tell,” Adam says dryly.
Shane grins, dark brown eyes warmly reflecting the dim bar lights. His cheeks are pleasantly flushed from the heat of the bar and sweat of rehearsal. “Can I sit?”
“It’s your bar, be my guest.”
Shane’s grin only grows wider and he takes the chair directly next to Adam, knee only an inch away from his own. This close, he can feel the heat from Shane’s body and smell the light scent of after-shave, mixed with the alcohol he’s been serving all night. Adam wants to lean in to it, but remembers he’s not supposed to be lovestruck and stops himself.
“Thanks for sticking up for me earlier,” Shane’s grin slides off his face and he turns more solemn, examining the table instead. “Even though you had the part you wanted.”
Adam hates him a bit for reminding him about that. Then again, he finds that Shakespeare and what part he plays has been the last thing on his radar recently. It’s not that he doesn’t care, more that he finds himself content with how things turned out. Like things are turning out how they’re supposed to. And it all seems to come back to the person sitting next to him, which is both exciting and unnerving.
Then, because Adam has to be reckless in some other way and because he’s at his wit’s end. “I got your text,” he blurts out.
Shane’s eyebrows raise slightly in the way Adam has come to know means he’s surprised, but he reads a bit of pleasure there too. “You did?”
“Yep.”
“You never responded.”
“Seemed a little bit silly to respond when we were in the same room,” Adam retorts.
“But we weren’t when you first got it.”
“But we were going to be.”
Shane leans back in his chair. “You didn’t know that then. Seems like you were avoiding me, honestly.”
Adam’s sure the expression on his face is not kind. It feels like he’s a child again, pouting at not winning an argument. This only seems to make Shane more pleased.
“So do you have an answer?” Shane’s voice is low and strikes Adam right to the core, the sound settling deep in Adam’s lower stomach. Adam’s cheeks feel hot, yet he refuses to look away. At some point, they’d naturally gravitated closer, and Shane’s thigh is now pressed directly against Adam’s.
Adam has long since lost control of the situation and it’s all too overwhelming. Abruptly, he stands, his chair screeching against the concrete floor of the bar. “I think I’ll take a walk. Outside.”
“Oh,” Shane glances over to where the rest of the cast has gathered, so Adam can only see his face in profile. The corner of his mouth has turned down and his shoulders have slumped slightly.
“Do you want to come?”
Shane looks back up at him, dark brown eyes searching Adam’s face. “A walk sounds nice,” as he stands, he takes one more glance back at the cast, still going strong. “Think they’ll be okay?”
Adam surveys the actors. This late at night, they remind him of the fairies from the play, completely without worries, as they roar with laughter at the owner of the bar yelling at them about who knows what. Stefan and Charles have managed to get behind the bar and are trying to soothe the bartender, while Grace is sneaking off with an entire bottle of whiskey. “I think it’s probably for the best. Prevents complicity when your boss murders them all”
“Good point,” Shane chuckles and gestures for Adam to go first. “Lead the way.”
They slide out of the bar and onto the streets of Brooklyn. A few stragglers are still out, not paying them much mind as they drift down the street. It’s the height of summer, but there’s a cool breeze that sweeps in and Adam can smell freshly cut grass as they walk.
Adam shoves his hands in his pockets and tips his head back to find the moon, only a sliver in the sky, accompanied by a single blurry star. “The only time I regret moving to New York is when I can’t see the stars.”
Shane glances up now, too, face cast an eerie yellow-green by the street lights and neon signs of a restaurant they just passed. Dressed in all black, he looks like a statue that only wakes up in the night, brought to life by the moon’s light. “I’ve always lived in cities, so I’ve never been able to see the stars.”
“I grew up out in the middle of nowhere. My mom used to say the stars in the skies were the number of wishes I’d made each night.”
Adam stares at the single star next to the moon as Shane points a finger at it. “What does that one stand for then?”
A few weeks ago, Adam would have answered decisively. To be an actor. Adam’s mom had said as long as he kept wishing, one of his wishes would come true. That the sky would answer him. Back then, he’d barely even dreamed of New York and only thought of getting out of Ohio. As he grew older, he dedicated more and more of his time to acting. Even during his years in the city, that was the singular reason that had driven him. The reason he’d grown louder, the reason he’d picked fights with others like Kyle, was to prove he was better, that he was going to be better.
The thing he’s been ignoring is that he is better. He’s in a production every few weeks, and he knows a lot of people in the community. Without realizing it, Adam has gotten what his childhood self wanted. There was still a way to go, but it was more than the little kid wishing on stars could ever dream of.
Perhaps that’s why he’s able to finally wish for something new. “Hey, Shane,” he turns to fully face him, noting the curve of his shoulders and the way his hips narrow.
Shane pulls his gaze away from the stars, turning a quizzical stare to Adam. Adam blows air between his lips and says the
most painful thing. “I really am sorry for what a shit I was.”
Shane ducks his head to his chin, shoving his hands in his pockets. “It’s okay. I think I kinda understand better now,” he pauses, shuffling his feet, seeming to contemplate something. “Do you know, I feel like I’ve just been in this weird stasis for the last, like, eight years?”
“Stasis?”
“Yeah. Like, I’ve been working at this bar, had no clue what I was doing, didn’t really have anything I wanted to do, and I was watching life go on and completely pass me by,” Shane lets out another laugh, but this one more self-deprecating. “And then you showed up, and I don’t think I’ve seen anyone as passionate as you about something. And there I was, being a dick, only half-committed.”
“I didn’t have to keep pushing you though.”
“No, it was good,” and now Shane’s much too earnest, stepping forward a bit. “I don’t think anyone’s challenged me like that in years, except Violet. And I got used to ignoring her.”
“That’s a skill. It’s nearly impossible to ignore her,” Adam hates to admit it, but Violet’s scary.
Shane ignores him now. “I admired you for that passion. It’s inspired me to find something like it.”
“Not acting?”
Shane shrugs. “Acting’s fun, but I’m not sure that’s what I want for the rest of my life.”
“You still haven’t performed yet,” Adam closes his eyes, and he can see the curtains rising and the audience clapping right behind them. “There’s nothing like the first night.”
“I’ll have to wait and see,” Shane scuffs his shoe against the sidewalk. “Do you regret it?”
“Regret what?”
“Standing up for me,” he pauses. “Not keeping the bigger part.
Adam considers the question, staring up at the cloudy, night sky. “It’s a good lesson, I think, to remind me that the parts don’t matter if I don’t feel good about the production. It’s a team effort, every time, you know?”
“Sure.”
“I think…I want to get to a point where I can just accept any role, big or small, and be happy about it.”
They fall silent, simply staring out at the cars passing by on the street. Adam’s unwilling to break the silence, thinking his brain might default back to its usual idiocy if he does so.
Shane, however, has one more question. “You never told me what the star up there stood for.”
Adam glances back up at the star again, which he can now barely see with the street lights in his eyes. When he turns away, Shane’s waiting patiently for an answer. In fact, he’s been waiting patiently for hours now.
“There’s really only one thing I want right now,” he steps forward, closing the gap between them. He grips Shane’s shirt, making him bend down to meet him because, aside from everything else, the fucker is still too tall. Their lips brush, softer than last time, and Adam’s entire body tingles like it’s been shocked to life. Something seems to click inside Shane, and he pulls Adam closer, deepening the kiss.
When they pull away, Shane’s smiling ear to ear and Adam is certain he looks no different.
“Is that going to be it?” Adam asks, pushy but trying for playful.
“With that tone, it should be,” but Shane grasps his hand and tugs him along. “Come on.”
The walk to Shane’s apartment is both painful and exhilarating, with the two taking turns shoving each other up against whichever wall they want, hands roaming anywhere and everywhere.
Eventually, they reach Shane’s apartment and practically run up the three flights of stairs. Shane fumbles for his keys as Adam traces a line down his back, watching as Shane shivers.
Finally, Shane rips the door open and tugs Adam in. The apartment hasn’t changed much since the last time Adam was there, but Shane doesn’t allow him any time to inspect it. As soon as Adam closes the door behind him, Shane crowds him against the wall, lips already covering his own again. This kiss is different than the others, hot, searing and wanting. Adam gives as good as he gets, biting down on Shane’s bottom lip, sucking it. Shane yelps a little, but doesn’t seem to mind too much as he draws away and litters a trail of kisses down Adam’s jaw.
“You’re such a dick, you know,” Shane mutters.
“You just figured that out?” it’s meant to be sarcastic and dry, but Adam’s voice is breathless. He hisses as Shane reaches the corner between his neck and shoulder and nibbles the muscles playfully. Adam feels like his entire body could catch fire then and there.
“No, it’s not hard to figure out,” then, Shane bites down on the juncture, sucking gently, as Adam scrapes his fingers through Shane’s hair.
“Well, sorry I’m not mysterious and tall and shit,” Adam traces his hands down Shane’s chest.
“No, I like it. You’ve got more courage than the rest of us. You don’t bother with any pretense.”
Adam swallows. He’s never heard whatever the heck he’s doing described as courage. In lieu of responding, his fingers trace lower, until they’re at the edges of Shane’s shirt. He rubs the fabric between his thumb and forefinger for a second, his fingertips just barely brushing bare skin. When he looks back up, Shane’s eyes are dark and Adam flashes his teeth at him in a smile. Feeling more decisive, he presses his fingers lightly to Shane’s abdomen and the man shudders in response. He lets his hand trail just above Shane’s pants before switching gears, tugging the shirt completely up. Shane throws it off to the side, and in the time that he’s distracted, Adam pushes him back until the man’s legs hit the couch. Another push and he’s sitting, Adam standing between his legs.
“You’re so pushy,” Shane says, reaching for Adam’s hand and tugging slightly.
“Do you have anything nice to say about me?” Adam asks as he swings his leg over Shane’s knees, straddling him. He goes back to his earlier mission, fascinated by the heat Shane gives off. Idly, he plucks one of Shane’s nipples, pleased when Shane’s jaw tightens.
“I might, but do you really want to hear them?” Shane’s grin is wicked.
Adam plucks harder at the nipple before capturing it in his mouth and biting down. He’s rewarded with a satisfying yelp, and he flicks his tongue once more before releasing it. “Hm, do you have something good?”
Shane rolls his eyes, though his chest is heaving harder than before. “A few things, but you always get this look like I’m getting ready to kick you when I say them.”
“I’m…not good at nice,” Adam murmurs.
“You are in your own way, I think. You just have to learn that not everyone is out to get you, and sometimes…sometimes people do want to help or just be around you.”
Adam hums, tapping a finger to his lips. Shane’s clearly deluded, but he’s not going to convince him otherwise. Shifting his hips slightly, Adam’s pleased when he brushes up against the growing bulge in Shane’s jeans.
The other man growls and pulls Adam back into a heated kiss. Adam rocks forward, eliciting a groan from them both as their erections rub together. Shane pulls away and Adam is confused for a moment, until Shane reaches for his shirt, having apparently decided Adam has too many clothes on. When Adam tosses his own shirt aside, Shane’s hands are already grabbing him, flipping him and pressing his back into the couch. Adam hooks one leg around Shane’s hip and Shane grinds down, capturing Adam’s mouth in his again. It’s sloppy, but Adam arches into him, seeing if they can meld together.
It’s over too soon, though, when Shane tears away. His eyes are sparkling with a mischief Adam’s never seen before and his hair is a complete disaster. He slides his tongue across his own swollen lips and Adam lets out a strangled noise. Shane slides his hands down lower and lower, until they reach Adam’s abdomen. Heat flares in Adam’s stomach and he stops breathing.
Much too slowly for Adam’s taste, Shane unbuckles Adam’s pants and slides them down. Shane quirks an eyebrow at the tent in Adam’s boxers. “Well, someone looks excited.”
“Oh my God, th
at’s so fucking…” Adam cuts off with a strangled gasp before he can say “Corny,” as Shane’s hands dip under his waistband and grasp his length. His thumb swipes over the head, then, without giving Adam any time to process what’s happening, Shane swallows him into his mouth.
“Holy shit,” Adam throws his head back and the sensation really is too much. His entire body seems to be consumed by heat. Adam swears he’s going to catch fire. Shane’s tongue only makes it worse. Adam grasps at the edges of the couch, as he unintentionally bucks his hips. Shane pulls back and Adam whines, the pressure of his cock feeling enormous.
“It looks like I finally found a way to shut you up,” Shane says thoughtfully, eyes darting up and down Adam’s body.
“That’s great and all,” Adam’s voice sounds hoarse even to his own ears. “But I’m hoping this isn’t some sick revenge and you’re going to leave me like this.”
“Now that’s a thought. Just hold on,” Shane smacks his thigh, as he staggers up and out of sight. Adam groans, letting his head fall back again, brain nowhere near focused enough to follow. He’s hard, leaking, and can hardly process how a man he barely knows could elicit such pleasure from him.
Just when he thinks Shane has abandoned him, the man appears again, armed with a familiar foil package and bottle of lube. His pants are gone now, giving Adam a good view. Greedily, Adam drinks him in, dragging his gaze over him from head to toe. Shane allows him, before clambering on top of him again. The heat in Adam’s body only seems to amplify as Shane’s bare skin brushes against him. Adam wraps his arms around Shane’s shoulders, pulling Shane’s mouth to his again. It’s soft and slow this time, keeping the heat burning in Adam’s lower half. Adam decides Shane has way too much control and grasps Shane’s cock, the solid length pulsing in his hand. Shane gasps into his mouth, hips lurching a bit into Adam’s grip. With just a few strokes, he has Shane frantically panting into his mouth.
“You never let me gain any ground,” Shane says, with a short laugh, but he’s not completely distracted. One cold finger has found its way to Adam’s entrance, and Adam hisses as it presses into him, cock twitching. One finger works him, then two, and then three, and Adam clenches his jaw.
Standing Ovation: A M/M Contemporary Romance Page 10