by Jessica Gunn
“You had good reason to.” I bit my lip as I looked up at him. My pulse thundered behind my ears, my breath shallow, as I waited for him to speak again. He didn’t, not for a few long moments.
“That’s not the point. If Jaffrin assigned you, I had no reason to doubt him. And I did.” Ben reached out a hand and held it aloft in the space between us. “Start over again?”
I looked at his open palm and blinked. Starting over. Twelve days had passed since I’d joined the team in that alleyway. Too much had happened in that time to ever go back again. We’d regained Riley. Discovered Giyano’s motives—sort of. And, most importantly, we’d dealt Shadow Crest a painful blow.
No, we’d come too far to turn back. I knew it and so did Ben. And we’d come too far in more ways than one. I wasn’t totally sure about Ben, beyond the intensity in his eyes, but my heart still raced.
So instead of shaking his hand, I leaned in and kissed him. Ben froze for a moment, the shock of it registering, but then he lifted his hand to cup my cheek as the kiss grew longer. Chills zipped down my spine to my toes.
I grinned against his lips and pulled back. “Rest up, Sparky. Once we get this whole thing settled with Riley, it’s back to training for both of us.”
Then I stepped back and sauntered down the hall, listening to Ben sputter as I walked away. I didn’t have the courage to look back and see if that was a good thing.
I went home separately from the team, stopping on the way to buy more crystals. Tiger’s eye this time, for protection. I carried home the five large chunks of stone and scattered them around the house. One at each door and three in other places. As I positioned the last stone, I muttered a spell. Well, it was more like a prayer for protection. According to Blackwood teachings, this would keep the house safe for one night.
Maybe.
It settled my nerves either way. We’d become a massive target for Shadow Crest, and that didn’t sit well with me at all.
When I finished, I sat at the kitchen table and stared at the wall. My wrist burned. Whatever Giyano had done to me still lingered. And he was still alive and wanted my Alzanian power.
Dark lines swam over the area that had once housed his magik. Like spider veins that moved. I pulled down the sleeve of my shirt to cover it.
“It’s dark, you know.”
I startled at the sound and turned. Nate stood behind me in the doorway to the kitchen. “What is?”
“Your magik,” he said. “Your ether has started to change.” He paused, concentrating on something. “It’s Giyano, isn’t it?”
I swallowed hard and pursed my lips. “Yeah.”
Nate trailed into the kitchen and sat down beside me at the table. “That’s not good.”
“No. It’s not.” A long moment passed us by until I added, “I think he wants to turn me into a demon. Or at least turn my magik against me.”
“What’s the point? It’s not like even after he makes you a demon he can control your mind. You’d never do any of the evil things he’d send you to do.”
I nodded slowly. “I know. Doesn’t mean I can hold him back.”
“You will,” Nate said. “We will.”
I didn’t have it in me to tell him that I was pretty sure I’d figured out part of why Giyano had become involved in all of this. Whoever Lady Azar had killed in Salem, the body that Giyano had dragged into Shadow Crest’s layer… I was pretty sure that person had the Power, too. Lady Azar wanted the Power to fight Alzan and to win. She knew about Giyano’s friend. And because of that, somehow, that friend had ended up dead with Giyano watching from afar.
So Giyano had wanted revenge. That’s why he’d tried to kill her in my vision, and why he’d turned on her today.
Nate tapped my shoulder. “Come on. We all need to get some sleep.”
“It’s three in the afternoon,” I said to him.
He nodded. “Exactly. It’s already been a long day. Let’s order a pizza and then sleep for a good long while.”
I looked down at my covered wrist, surprised Nate didn’t call me out on it further. Whatever he saw with his ether-sensing, clearly it wasn’t too bad.
Maybe Giyano hadn’t turned enough in me. Maybe I’d be fine. Or maybe I’d be transformed into a demon and hunted before Jaffrin found my so-called “other half” and we fulfilled the prophecy to save Alzan.
Or maybe it wouldn’t matter at all.
“Sleep sounds good,” I said. “Pizza too.”
I let him help me up and walk me into the living room, where my team had gathered. As I took in the sight of all four of us and Riley in one place, safe for the moment—and alive—I realized that maybe having a team wasn’t so bad after all.
We’d surely need each other before our war with Shadow Crest had passed. Whatever may come.
Chapter 26
BEN
I didn’t sleep a wink all night. Riley held all of my attention without effort. And despite the exhaustion throbbing in my bones and in my mind, I haven’t ever been this awake and alive except for the day he’d been born.
When Sandra had first told me she was pregnant, I’d freaked. Lost all control, pushed her away, and didn’t talk to her for nearly twenty-four hours. But during that time, I’d realized we could do this. If not well, we’d at least be able to give it a decent enough attempt.
Then Giyano had kidnapped him. Ripped Riley from his very stroller.
But he was home now, and that was all that mattered.
As for me…
Riley had called me “Daddy” before I’d put him to bed. He’d remembered.
That was all I needed right now. My decision had already been made: Riley wasn’t safe and wouldn’t be so long as I, and he, had ties to this demon-fighting side of the world.
Riley stirred beside me, waking with a deep breath. His eyes fluttered open and settled on me, a rush of warmth—of love—overwhelming my chest. Riley smiled that open-mouth, toothy toddler smile and my eyes watered, my lungs tight. How I’d ever let someone take him, kidnap my singular everything in this life… I’d never allow it to happen again. I’d been an utter failure of a father. Inexcusable.
I’d spend the rest of my life making up for losing him, even if he was safe now.
I pulled my son to me and hugged him tight. “I’ll always find you,” I whispered to him. “Always.”
I just hoped I’d never have to go searching ever again.
Rain pounded against the car as I drove from Boston to a small town in Connecticut. After Riley had been kidnapped and she’d kicked me out of our house, Sandra had moved back home. We’d met in high school and had gotten unexpectedly pregnant at the beginning of our senior year of college, the story about as cliché as it gets.
I turned off Route 84 and into Sandra’s town, listening to Riley chatter on about something outside the window— clouds or birds or something. I couldn’t really make real words out of his toddler babble, hadn’t been around him long enough to understand any of it. And since he might have spent the last two-and-a-half years in a cave, I wasn’t sure he even knew what a bird was. God. What had they done to him this whole time?
Jaffrin’s doctors at Fire Circle Headquarters had given Riley a clean bill of health, but I wasn’t sure. This wasn’t the end. No matter how much I wanted it to be.
Rachel had run out earlier this morning to grab a car seat from the closest kid’s store. It hadn’t been cheap. But hopefully, it’d see more use than this singular ride. In any case, I doubted Sandra had a car seat big enough for Riley anymore.
Fifteen minutes later saw me driving through her neighborhood. I’d only been here one other time, Thanksgiving during our senior year of college. Right after Sandra had found out about being pregnant. That visit hadn’t been a pleasant one. Turned out her parents weren’t fond of us having children before being married.
“Almost here, buddy,” I said over my shoulder to Riley.
He gave me his big, toothy grin, then paused, looking confused.
“Home,” I said. “We’re almost home to Mommy.”
Did he remember her? He had to, right? Wasn’t that some kind of survival instinct ingrained in children, to remember their mothers? I hadn’t expected him to remember me—I was just Dad. I hadn’t carried him for nine months, hadn’t talked to him until Sandra was four or five months along. But she’d sung him to sleep every night, even before he’d been born.
My chest squeezed, air not making it to my lungs. One step at a time. It was the only way to handle this. But this step would be the hardest.
I turned the corner and there it was, Sandra’s parents’ one-floor home tucked behind some trees. This is it. I pulled into the driveway and put the car in park.
“Are you ready to see Mommy?” I asked Riley.
“Yeah!” Or at least that’s what I thought he’d said. His words weren’t fully formed, and there was a little more stress on the “ye” than on the rest of the affirmation.
“Good. One of us has to be.”
He gave me this weird look, kind of tilting his head. I guessed it wasn’t totally impossible to think he understood me. It wasn’t like he was an alien or anything.
I climbed out of the car and swung around to take Riley out of the back. Along with the car seat, Rachel had bought Riley new clothes so Sandra wouldn’t be reliant on whatever she’d gotten from the baby shower and decided to keep after Riley had been taken.
Whatever Sandra’s reaction would be, she’d have to take Riley overnight. Which is why I hadn’t bothered calling ahead.
I gulped, freezing with Riley on my hip. Two-and-a-half years ago, I’d laughed at Jaffrin for offering me a job as a Hunter. Mere weeks ago, I’d been pissed at Krystin’s appearance, at her obvious skills undermining my authority. And now, suddenly… I can’t leave.
I’d figured it out this morning. But not until I stood before Sandra’s house did it sink in that I’d be giving up my son after finding him. After everything these past two years.
It’s the only way.
The front door opened, smacking against the paneling on the house. It snapped me out of my thoughts, my gaze cutting to the person standing at the front door. Her hair hung in long ringlets and she had a hand pressed to her mouth, eyes wide.
“Ben?” she asked, then shook her head over and over again. “No. Ben?”
I nodded and started up the driveway, popping Riley back into place on my hip as he’d started to droop downward. I hauled the bag over my other shoulder. “Hey, Sandra.”
“Oh, my god.” Sandra dropped her hand and barreled across the front porch, down the sidewalk, and straight up to me. She scooped Riley out of my arms and held him tight. “Oh god, Riley. You’re here. Don’t worry, Mommy’s here, baby.” Tears streamed down her face—fear and relief mixed together. Her eyes found mine over Riley’s head as she held him to her chest. “How? When?”
My lips pursed together despite the joy overwhelming me at being able to bring Riley back to Sandra safe and sound. I lifted the backpack’s strap from my shoulder. “I’ve packed some clothes for him that’ll fit him now and a few toys. You can have the car seat, too, although I was hoping to—”
She reached out and pulled me into a massive hug. One I hadn’t realized I’d so sorely missed. I melted into it despite everything screaming inside of me to not get too attached. This wasn’t over after all. Not by a long shot.
Sandra kissed me once on the cheek, then kissed the top of Riley’s head. “Thank you,” she said to me. “He’s here. That’s all that matters.”
If only.
“Tell me everything.” Sandra rubbed Riley’s back as he slept in his old pack-and-play beside the couch. She’d reached over the side, refusing to let him out of her sight. We’d fed him lunch, then she’d settled him in for a nap. He appeared to remember her as his mother but stopped short of calling her “Mommy.” I didn’t want to know if that was because Lady Azar had taught him differently or if Riley simply hadn’t wanted to say it for whatever reason.
“Sandra.” I sighed, shaking my head, and scooted to the edge of my seat. “It’s complicated, and it’s a long story. All you need to know is that I took care of it. I fought the bad guys who took Riley and I rescued him.”
“Bad guys?” she asked, brow furrowed. “What are you talking about?”
She must not remember. Two-and-a-half years ago, I’d told her everything. That demons had taken Riley and that Jaffrin had given me a chance to fight them. But she’d either forgotten or had blocked it from her memory altogether. It was the same night she’d kicked me out of her house—and out of her life.
Maybe things would be better off this way, with her half-memories of my quickly delivered words. I’d already made my choice.
I smiled, though there were absolutely zero happy feelings inside me. “Riley is safe… for now. This isn’t over. And I’m afraid that me being near Riley, being close to you, will make things bad again. So I brought these for you.” I dug into my jacket pocket and tugged out a stack of folded papers.
Sandra blinked, her eyes widening. “Ben, I don’t understand.”
“I know,” I said. “I told you once, two-and-a-half years ago, and you didn’t believe me. So you may not remember now.” I held out the papers for her to take, and she did, as my heart broke over the words I hadn’t yet said. “I’ve made arrangements for you and Riley to move to Canada—near your aunt’s place. You’ll have a house and money, and when he’s ready, he’ll have a fund for preschool and everything after that. Including college. You’ll be taken care of. The Canadian border should keep you two safe and nothing will ever happen to Riley again. Someone I trust will always be there for you two, watching closely. And I’ll be there at the first sign of trouble.”
Sandra’s lips moved, but no words came out. Tears welled in her eyes. “Ben…”
A lump rolled up my throat, bringing tears to my own eyes along with it. “Don’t, Sandra. Please. I know you lost trust in me after Riley was… But he’s back now, and he’ll be safe as long as you go to Canada. I’ll follow—if you want. But first I need to finish the job here. I need to make the city safe for Riley again.”
I looked over the arm of the chair and down at the pack-and-play. Riley was still sound asleep inside, a thumb in his mouth. It near killed me, the thought of leaving him again. Like my very soul had been cleaved in two. But no matter how hard I’d fought for him, searched for him for the past two-and-a-half years, no matter how much I loved him… I had to let him go. With his mother. To safety.
It was because I loved the both of them that I could do this.
The only action in my power to keep Riley from Lady Azar’s clutches was to hide him away. Out of all the human laws, for one reason or another, Darkness obeyed country borders. Both Jaffrin and I were counting on that holding up in Riley’s case. And if not, a team of Hunters would be stationed nearby. At least until I had enough power to end Lady Azar’s life along with her world-ending plans. Whenever that would be.
Sandra’s tears spilled over, running down her cheeks in streams. “I just got you both back, and now you’re telling me I need to move to keep him safe? And that you’re not coming with me?”
I swallowed the lump in my throat and wiped tears from my own face. “My job’s not done here, Sandra. It’s best for him, for you, if I stay here and finish it. Then they can’t follow me to you, and Riley can’t get caught in the crossfire again.” I sucked in a deep breath and stood from the couch, then bent down and touched a hand to Riley’s back as it rose and fell in a steady pattern. To think that at one point I hadn’t wanted to be a father killed me. How could anyone not want this? I’d barely known him, barely been in his presence for most of his life, and yet… I couldn’t imagine life without Riley.
But he was alive. And safe. That was all that mattered.
Sandra stood, too, and grabbed my arm as I turned for the door. “Ben—you can’t just leave us. This is insane. If this is about your parents, about your father d
ying and your fear of following in his footsteps—” A sob cut off her words.
My fists balled at my sides, and it took everything within me not to admit that Sandra was right. Because she was. This was insane. And I didn’t want to leave now that we were together again.
But there were still demons in Boston. And a crazed woman with a plan to end the world by destroying Alzan.
“This is the only way,” I said as I kissed Sandra on the forehead. “A man named Jaffrin will be getting in touch with you regarding the logistics of the move.”
I took a few steps toward the front door, each an immense weight on my heart. Each another step farther from Riley. From Sandra. From everything that had existed before the Hunter Circles came into my life.
I turned to her when I reached the door and glanced over my shoulder. “Goodbye, Sandra. Once I slay the monsters, I’ll come back.”
“Or you could stay for good,” Sandra said, desperate but firm. Still trying to reach me past a decision already made.
“The world’s not safe for him yet.”
She smiled solemnly, as if she’d accepted our temporary fate. “So make it safe.”
I nodded slowly, determination setting in my heart. A faith I’d see this through. And like Krystin had said days before, faith was the only thing that separated us from the demons. “I will, Sandra. I promise.”
I didn’t break my promises, no matter how long they took to fulfill.
Chapter 27
KRYSTIN
Ben pulled into the driveway around 8 p.m. that night. We’d been waiting around for him to return. Jaffrin had summoned all of us to Fire Circle Headquarters four hours ago, even though he’d just seen Ben this morning. Something urgent had happened. Something incredibly important.
The team and I waited in the kitchen for him to enter the house, his eyes wide and concerned the moment they found ours.