There were so many questions, but not enough answers.
I’d zoned out again, and Nixie was going on about blood supplements when I mentally rejoined the conversation, but none of it had to do with me. As much as I felt for the human at having just been thrust into a world that she previously believed was fictional, I needed a moment to myself.
Moving Nixie from my shoulder to the table, I excused myself and headed for the door. I was still wearing the disguise Nixie had given me from earlier, so I wasn’t worried about being seen if there were any vamps still lingering around the area. I just needed to clear my head.
As soon as my feet touched the sand, I kicked my socks and shoes off, leaving them at the edge of our property, then rolled up my jeans. The sun was shining, and I soaked it in. I missed the heat. It had been so long since I’d felt truly warm, but it wouldn’t last. Our fight wasn’t done. Not even close.
The beach was mostly empty, so I took a seat in the sand, content to let the waves lull me into a false sense of peace. Before I could fully succumb to the beauty, Jaxon sat next to me.
“Mind if I join you?” he asked, offering me a small smile.
“Of course not.”
“How are you doing?” He stared out into the waves like I had been, but now he had my full attention.
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “How have you dealt with all of this for the last few years? Working for Gillian couldn’t have been easy. You were just sixteen when he took you from your life.”
I’d known Jaxon for several months now, but I still didn’t know how he’d ended up in Mandora. It was a touchy subject for him, but one I hoped he’d feel comfortable speaking about at some point. Sooner rather than later, preferably.
“I haven’t dealt with it. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to.” His stormy eyes met mine. “I made choices I can’t take back. Things that will stay with me no matter what I do.”
My hand reached for him. “I didn’t mean to pry. I know you don’t like to talk about your past, and I respect that.”
“It’s okay. I think it’s time you knew. It might even help you.” Though he’d said the words, he didn’t continue, and I wasn’t going to pressure him.
We sat together on the beach as the sun began its descent. Finally, when I decided Jaxon wasn’t as ready to speak of his past as he thought, I moved to stand, but he stopped me.
His hand tightened around mine. “Stay.”
“You don’t have to tell me anything. I get having a messed-up past, and I’ll never force you to relive yours just so I can know the details,” I said softly.
His stare continued to gaze out into the horizon, but his grip remained tight on mine. “I had an amazing childhood, all things considered. One I wouldn’t have traded for anything in the world. My mother was the kindest person you could have ever known. She’d met my father, and they’d been married within weeks, but he died in the military while she was pregnant with me.
“Even though it was just the two of us, she was incredible at being there for everything. Somehow, she made it all work seamlessly, and I never felt like I was missing anything in life. That was, until she got sick and hid it from me for a long time. Until it was too late.”
Jaxon’s voice strained. The anguish he still felt over the loss of her was evident as he spoke.
“I’d been so furious with her for not telling me. Angry with the world for trying to take both of my parents. So, after she finally told me, I left before I said things I didn’t mean. I had no idea where I was running to, but I just kept going for hours until night fell. I ended up in the middle of nowhere outside of town and laid in the grass just staring at the stars.”
It was hard to picture a young Jaxon stargazing, but I managed it, and the image made me smile. Though, I knew this story didn’t have a happy ending, so I encouraged him to keep going.
“Someone came from out of nowhere. A woman wearing a blood red dress, perfectly put together, yet extremely out of place. Her presence put me at ease, and I told her what had happened like I’d known her for years instead of minutes.
“When I was done, she offered to fix my problem, but only if I helped her with one of hers. She said she could heal my mother, give me more time with her. Once I’d heard that, I didn’t care about anything else. I was a naïve kid who needed his mommy. So, I took the deal without asking for any details. She said all I had to do was give a bit of blood.”
I so badly wanted to say something about the injustice of what had been done to him, but nothing I could have said would change the past. All I could do was offer him the support and love he needed to heal, and hopefully make him see that whatever made him so angry was not his fault.
He continued, “As soon as I let her poke my finger, she forced my hand onto a scroll that appeared from thin air. Once the paper began to smoke, it turned black and formed into a humanoid image. Before I knew what was happening, the figure slammed into me and I passed out. When I woke back up, I was laying in the grass again and thought it had all been an awful nightmare.”
“Oh, gods, Jaxon. I’m so sorry,” I whispered as I fought back tears for his pain.
“When I came home, Mom was feeling better. We both apologized and spent the next day together before her regular doctor’s appointment she needed me to take her to because of the injection they were giving her. Before the doctor could do so, they took blood to check her levels and get the right dosage. When the test came back, something was wrong.
“They sent her to the hospital for a full work-up, and while my mom was feeling better, we had no idea what was going on with the tests. Two days later, we were called back in, and they told us she was cancer free. Somehow, she’d healed, and they called it a miracle, but I still remembered my nightmare. I knew the truth but wasn’t ready to admit it could be real.”
“So, is your mom still alive? How did you end up in Mandora?” I asked, unable to help myself.
His chest rumbled, and he let go of my hand as he took several calming breaths while opening and closing his fingers. “No, she’s not. She was killed a week later by a drunk driver who walked away from the accident without a scratch. If I thought I’d been angry after she told me about the cancer, I was uncontrollably furious when the police showed up at school to tell me she was gone.”
Tears fell freely down my cheeks. I’d done so well keeping my emotions in check, but picturing a helpless Jaxon hearing about his mother’s sudden death did me in.
“When I ran from the school, a voice sounded in my mind. I didn’t know where it was coming from, but it was keeping me from the social worker who had not only been there to tell me about my mother, but also wanted to take me from the only home I’d ever known, ‘for my well-being’, of course.
“Once I’d gotten away, the voice became louder and more controlling. Telling me things I didn’t want to hear and wanting me to do things I’d normally never do. Finally, I figured out that the nightmare I’d had the week prior wasn’t just my imagination. It had really happened, and I was stuck with a demon inside me.”
I reached for him, offering any sort of support I could. My lips pressed against his shoulder as I did my best to calm the tremors rocking through his core, but Jaxon wasn’t done letting it all out.
“The same woman showed up again and said it was time to pay my debt. I was to host this demon and do his bidding. If I refused, then I would be tortured.” He paused, his eyes meeting mine. “I tried, Cara. I tried so hard to refuse. I just wanted to die, but they wouldn’t let me.”
Gods, I was going to find this woman and murder her myself. She didn’t deserve to walk in any of our worlds.
“After a few days, I lost my mental and physical strength. They’d beaten me into submission, and the demon took full control. He used my hands to kill people, and I couldn’t stop him. Finally, after a week of being unable to control my own body, Gillian showed up and arrested me.”
No, Gillian showed up and found his perfect puppet.
A young man who had no idea what was happening to him and didn’t know any better than to trust someone who was supposed to work for the justice system, not abuse it.
“Gillian helped me by restraining the demon with his magic, only allowing him out when I needed him, not the other way around. Slowly, I got my control back and we found a balance. I went from prisoner to pawn without ever even realizing it.”
“Why haven’t you lost control of the demon since Gillian died? What does it do inside of you when you’re not using him?” I knew nothing about demons except they were born from darkness, though even that didn’t really mean much. Jaxon was far from evil.
“Gillian used a blood spell, so the gift of control is permanent. As for the demon, after a year or so, he became a part of my subconscious. Probably similar to a shifter and their animal. He’s quiet most of the time, thankfully. Most of everything since then you pretty much know.”
That I did, but I also knew something else.
“I know enough to be certain that you’re a good man, Jaxon. It doesn’t matter what you did in your past, what deals you made, or what you were forced to do. You’ve changed, and you are your own person now. A man who would do anything for those he cares about.”
“Exactly, Flower. I might forget it from time to time, but deep down, I know who I am and who I am not. I told you this so you would understand the same thing. People made decisions for you in your past, but that doesn’t mean those choices define who you are. Being part Luccovino doesn’t make you any different.”
Oh, he was good. Too good. I hadn’t even seen his point until he’d come right out and said it, but I knew he was right. While I was worried about what it meant to have their blood running through me, somewhere inside I knew I was still me. I was a good person with pure intentions. I wouldn’t be anyone’s pawn in whatever game was being played. I was also a Fitzsimmons, and I refused to let my grandmother’s death be in vain.
“Thank you for sharing and helping me understand. It means more to me than I can properly tell you,” I said, leaning my head down on his shoulder and watching the sky change from light blue to fiery orange, then deep purple.
We stayed like that on the beach well past when the sun fully set, but finally, I figured it was only responsible of us to go check on Jenna. Maybe she’d remembered more information and we’d have a new plan in place soon.
Chapter 6
Shouts could be heard from inside when we stepped off the sand, and I worried Jenna had given in to the bloodlust, doing something she wouldn’t ever be able to take back. Jaxon and I sprinted until we flew through the back door, but what we found wasn’t at all what we expected.
“Oh, calm down before you lose a limb,” Nixie yelled in Spencer’s face.
“You call me Groot one more time and I will lose a limb. Right up your ass,” Spencer snapped with furrowed brows. I’d never seen him so angry before.
Jaxon leaned in closer. “He’s a little sensitive about the tree jokes.”
“Apparently,” I scoffed.
Nixie fluttered around his face. “Would you rather I call you a paraphilia?”
Spence lifted his hand, but I flicked a small amount of magic at him. “Don’t you hit my fairy. I’ll hit you back twice as hard.”
“What the hell is a paraphilia?” Mason piped in.
“Someone who has sexual relations with a tree.” Nixie smirked, and I choked on my own laughter.
Jaxon stepped between the two troublemakers. “Nixie, make the stupid mug disappear. Ace, go outside and calm down. We don’t need this right now.”
He was right. I didn’t know a damn thing about newborns, but I’m sure Blake’s mojo only worked so far to keep Jenna calm.
Much to my surprise, when I glanced around the room, I found her with both hands covering her mouth and losing her shit in laughter.
“This can’t be real. This can’t be my life. A fairy. Vampires. Whatever else you guys think you are. No, this isn’t my life.” She began pinching her arms while shaking her head manically.
Blake reached for her. “Jenna, stop.”
When her head tilted up to meet his eyes, tears filled her own. “No. I need to wake up.”
Gods, my heart hurt so bad for her. I might have been ill-informed about the supernatural world while growing up, but I had known enough. I couldn’t imagine what she was going through, not only being turned, but finding out all of this was real.
By the time I turned back toward the kitchen, Spencer was already gone, and Nixie was sitting on the mug that caused all the drama in the first place.
“Why in the world would you get him a Groot cup in the first place?” I asked when I got closer.
She shrugged. “He told me I owed him a mug after we’d ditched them to see Greggor. I finally repaid the favor. It’s not my fault he didn’t specify what kind he wanted. I thought the fictitious tree was a thoughtful idea.”
“Bullshit,” I laughed.
Then, she winked and snapped her fingers. Just like that, the mug was gone. Even I was impressed with the magical move.
Within ten minutes, Blake had Jenna calmed back down and Spencer was inside again, back to his normal calm self.
Nixie sailed around to Blake and Jenna. “So, are we going to address the elephant in the room, or hope Blake can keep her calm? I mean, I’m not worried about her choosing me for dessert, but I don’t have the patience to deal with the emotional thunderstorm if she sucks one of you dry.”
My head shook. Nixie certainly had a way with words.
“One of you could break into the hospital and get blood bags for her,” Blake suggested, clearly not offering himself because he would have to leave her side and that obviously wasn’t happening.
Mason circled Nixie, who was hovering in the middle of the room. “You have an idea, or you wouldn’t have brought it up.”
She tipped her head. “Perceptive today. Almost impressive, but not quite.” Nixie flew to Jenna, scaring the hell out of her. “I don’t bite. I know things and I stab people. So, unless you see my swords out, don’t be afraid.”
Jenna nodded stiffly, and Blake’s chest rumbled. Gods, this was going to be uncomfortable.
“Unfortunately, pretty boy is right. I had this plan to unveil it, but since he’s ruined my staging, I’ll just come out with it. I can make you blood, but it won’t taste the same. Now, you’ve never had human blood, so we might be fine, but you also might throw up, and if you spew blood on me, I will cut you.”
Jenna’s face tightened with pain. “Can you please quit saying that word?”
Blake pulled her away. “Please make it. Quickly.”
“Only because you said please.” Then, Nixie zoomed into the kitchen, and fairy dust began flying everywhere.
I took a few steps toward Jenna, and Blake tried to stop me from getting near. “I’m not going to hurt her, Romeo.”
He nodded, clearing whatever freak-out he’d been on the brink of from his face. “I know. I’m sorry.”
“We’ll just call this payback for all those headaches I caused you not too long ago.” I winked, and he finally cracked a smile.
“Deal.” He moved aside so I could see Jenna.
“I know the fairy is crass, but you’ll get used to her. She really does want to help you. She just has a horrid way of showing it.”
“I can hear you!” Nixie called from the kitchen, but I ignored her.
“What if I can’t drink the stuff she makes?” Jenna’s full lips quivered.
“Let’s not worry about that before it even happens. Blake will keep you calm. Just try your best. We will figure something out.” Glancing between the two of them, I noticed the new vamp was still gravitating toward him, even though Blake had backed up some so I could speak with her. Interesting that it wasn’t only a one-way connection between them.
While Nixie continued to make a mess in the kitchen, the rest of us settled onto the couches. Taking a seat with Jaxon, I sighed, enjoying how much freer
it felt being outside the prison walls. Even though I’d only stayed in a cell a couple of nights, the horrors of that prison wouldn’t soon be forgotten.
I still often thought about Anthony and hoped he’d found peace in his afterlife. His soul had been too kind for the screwed-up world we lived in, and he hadn’t deserved what happened to him, but I’d like to think he was watching over us and knew we got him justice.
But our freedom wasn’t won, yet. We still had to figure out what threat the Luccovinos were to us. We were a team, and if Greggor was right that they were coming for me, then they were coming for all of us. It took me too long to realize the truth in that, but I knew it now and wasn’t afraid of what came next because of it.
Nixie came back into the room, floating a bottle of red pills with one hand and an enclosed coffee mug with the other, which she pushed forward first. “This is my suggestion. Taste this. Try to get the whole cup down.” Then, she shook the bottle. “These are for on-the-go use. They won’t satisfy you by any means, but they’ll curb cravings so one of us doesn’t become your meal.”
Jenna flinched at that last bit. “Uh, thanks.” She stood and reached for the cup. As soon as she was closer, her tongue darted out and I could see her fangs already protruding.
This was such a horrible idea, and we were all going to die.
Blake placed a hand on her back, but she shrugged him off. “While I appreciate you’ve kept me sane these last few hours, I need to do this on my own.”
Damn. I hadn’t been expecting that, and she’d earned my respect with one sentence. Even Nixie grinned, telling me she hadn’t missed the comment, either.
The empath nodded and took a step back, but I could tell from his tense shoulders that he was ready to act if necessary.
Jenna pulled the cup closer, cradling it like it was treasure, then took a small sip. We all waited with bated breath to see how she’d react. I had expected gagging of some sort, but instead, she shocked the hell out of us and began chugging the mug.
Jaxon leaned in closer and whispered. “That is exactly how you look with your first cup of coffee in the mornings.”
Escape (Elite Supernatural Trackers Book 3) Page 4