by Claire Luana
At this, a few heads nodded. None were spared the Gleaming, or the gruesome price to be paid if it revealed a daughter of the moon.
“The law is clear. By the power vested in me by King Ozora, I pronounce the following sentence.”
Prefect Youkai paused and the crowd seemed to take in a collective breath. “The King has decreed that all moonburners shall be left in the Tottori Desert to die, as a sacrifice to our God Taiyo. Kai is sentenced to death in the desert.”
Death by desert? It was one thing to leave a baby there to die, it wasn’t truly aware of its predicament, and was no doubt picked off by predators before long. But to force a grown woman to slowly die of heat and dehydration? It seemed cruel, even by Kitan standards.
“For his crime of treason, I pronounce Raiden’s sentence to be death by hanging.”
“No!” Kai cried. “It’s not his fault! I’m the moonburner . . .” Her pleas were cut off as one of the soldiers cracked his spear butt across the back of her legs. She fell to her knees and closed her eyes in disbelief.
“As for Hanae, a husband is the head of the house, and she had no authority to contradict her husband’s treasonous words or deeds. Therefore, her punishment will not be death. She will become the property of King Ozora and serve Kita faithfully in bonded servitude. She will remain here to serve Ushai shoen. This is my decree.”
Kai and her father’s mouths dropped open in shock. Cold fury was written across her mother’s face—her perfect doll’s face a storm of anger. Prefect Youkai had played this one perfectly. Get rid of the husband and daughter and enslave the woman he had always desired. No doubt Hanae would be serving King Ozora as the personal slave of Youkai. Rage and hatred swept through Kai’s body in a rush of heat. She had to live. She had to live to make him pay.
The blackness surrounded Kai once again, but this time she welcomed it. They had placed her back in her cell, utterly alone, any sliver of light blocked from view. She could finally let down her guard, drop the mask of strength and indifference that she had worn for Youkai and the crowd. Her fear and sorrow rushed over her in a tidal wave that threatened to sweep her away.
Kai laid on her side and cried wracking sobs, shoulders heaving, all dignity gone. Her tears mingled with the dust on the floor, muddying her face.
Her sentence was to be carried out at daybreak the next day. The village inhabitants had work to do, searching for the missing, burying the dead, making sure the survivors had food, water and shelter.
No time for an execution in that busy schedule, she thought to herself, as the last bit of grief drained from her. She felt empty. Hollow. The feeling came as a relief after the force of emotion that had been washing over her.
Kai pondered what her short future would hold. Ushai shoen bordered the Tottori Desert, a vast piece of desolate land that stretched for thousands of leagues. No one lived in the desert. No one survived it. As children, they had dared each other to walk into the shimmering expanse, taunting each other to see who could walk the farthest. The bravest among them only made it a few hundred feet; the oppressive heat and blinding emptiness of the desert played tricks on your mind.
At least she would leave this world a free woman, no longer hiding from the world what she was. That was something.
Hours passed. No one came. The guards didn’t bring her food or water. Kai alternated between sitting against the cold stone wall and pacing the small cell. When her pacing through the darkness caused a stubbed toe and a smarting nose, she finally sat down again.
When the guards came for her, Kai was ready. She straightened her shoulders and held her head high as they shackled her and led her from the cell.
Her parents were shackled in the square outside the village hall and others had gathered to witness the spectacle. Kai’s heart sank as she saw Tomm and Ren at the edge of the square. Tomm’s face was black with anger. Ren looked pained.
Prefect Youkai addressed the crowd, reveling in the rapt attention.
“When we offer a moonburner sacrifice to Taiyo, we offer her as she came
into this world. No more.” He approached her with a little smile on his face, a short blade in his hand. He grabbed what was left of her tattered shirt and began slicing her clothes off her.
She hissed as he pulled the shirt from her burned shoulders, taking some of her wounded skin with it. He cut her pants off next, until she was standing, naked, in front of the whole town. A flush rose up her body into her cheeks, and she blinked back hot tears. Her mother quietly sobbed while her father stood stone-faced, fists clenched by his sides.
“Walk,” Youkai said, and a soldier prodded her forward with his spear. She began to walk, feeling the heat of the hard gravel under her feet. It was the better part of a league to reach the desert, apparently they meant for her to walk the whole way. She was nearing Ren now and she couldn’t keep herself from looking at him, from silently pleading with him to meet her eyes, to understand that she hadn’t wanted to lie to him, that in another life she might have loved him. His chocolate brown eyes met hers for a second before he looked away.
Tomm was not so delicate, spitting in her face as she passed by. She recoiled as his saliva flecked her cheeks. She shook her head and blew the hair and spit off her forehead as best she could. From that point, she only looked straight ahead.
Kai walked for what felt like hours before they reached the edge of the desert. The sun, watching unblinking from its high vantage point in the bright blue sky, told her that less than an hour had truly passed. Sweat dripped down her forehead, stinging her eyes. Her feet left a trail of bloody footprints from the rough terrain along the way. Her embarrassment over her nakedness had faded, overshadowed by the pain throbbing through the burns on her back in rapid tempo.
Prefect Youkai had ridden ahead on a sturdy tan Misa horse, as he was too fat to make the walk himself. He had ten mounted soldiers with him, armed with bows and arrows. He dismounted clumsily as she and her two escorts approached, a slow macabre parade.
“Moonburner,” he sneered, taking in her naked form with a lecherous sweep. “This is where we say goodbye. I promise I will take good care of your mother.”
An unexpected calmness settled over Kai. She looked him straight in the eyes and made him a promise, casting each word like a master smith pounding the dents out of a suit of armor. “Goodbye for now, Youkai. But I will see you again. And that day will be your last.”
He shuffled back a step.
“These soldiers will be stationed at intervals across the Tottori border. If they get so much as a thought in their head that you might be trying to skirt the border and make your way out of the desert, they will put an arrow in your heart. If you make it that long, that is.”
Well, there went her one plan. Kai began walking, but then paused, a surge of panic rising.
“Aren’t you going to take my irons off?” She asked. She was as good as dead in the desert, but she was definitely dead if she was shackled.
“Maybe I will just forget that part,” Youkai said, turning towards his horse and gathering its reins.
“You said it yourself. The sacrifice to Taiyo must be pure, as she came into this world. Do you risk his wrath by tainting your offering?” she said, praying he was superstitious enough for her entreaty to work. She held out her shackles to him.
Youkai’s expression darkened.
“Unshackle her,” he said to her escort and swung heavily back into his saddle.
The guard complied, and Kai rubbed her swollen wrists.
“Now walk.”
CHAPTER 4
The hours sifted by like grains of sand. Or did they stand still? Kai wasn’t sure. She was sure only of the oppressive heat and the agony of her body—agony that threatened to overwhelm her. The chorus of her pains sounded off in a round, her back, her hand, her feet, her sunburned skin. Sometimes they sang together, and in those moments, she stood and screamed.
She walked, but in which direction she wasn’t sure. East, she figur
ed, southeast if she was precise. Not that there was anywhere to get to. There was no final destination, no safe haven if she just made it far enough. There was only sand and death. So she walked, not because she had a destination, but because she was not quite ready to lay down and die.
She wasn’t ready to be Taiyo’s sacrifice. The shiftless sun god who had plagued her from birth. His war had lasted so long that it was all Kita knew anymore. It made up the sum of her country’s identity. If he wanted her dead, he would have to work for it. So her mind turned to thoughts of survival.
Water was key, and she hadn’t a clue of where to find it. She knew creatures lived in the desert. She had seen a thorny lizard scurry past, had caught sight of a crimson hawk soaring above. Life meant water. But maybe not soon enough for her. She would find it, or she would die.
Next, she needed shelter. The sun’s rays beat down on her relentlessly, and she had no protection. Her burns flared like fire when the sun hit them. Her luck turned a few hours into her trek when she found an outcropping of golden rocks that formed a rough-hewn wall. She settled down in its shade and nearly cried in relief. She had made it far enough.
Night fell, and the desert grew bitter cold. Kai wrapped herself in a ball and huddled at the base of the rock, grateful for the residual heat it radiated from the day. Her teeth chattered and she shook convulsively, making sleep impossible. How did such heat turn into such cold?
The only consolation was the stars, more than she had ever seen before, glistening pinpricks dotting a blanket of inky darkness. Her mouth hung open as she looked at them all.
When the moon rose, almost full, its presence illuminated the darkness of the desert. Kai should be almost at the height of her powers as a moonburner during the full moon, but she had never had anyone to teach her. Her mother seemed to know a lot about moonburner culture and teaching in theory, but professed to have no practical information about how a burner actually drew power. Plus, as Hanae would always lecture, it would be too dangerous. Kai thought wistfully about the night as a child when she snuck out of the house and ran into the fields, calling to Tsuki, to the moon, to the stars, to fill her with power. It only took Hanae dragging her back to the house and spanking her till she screamed to end that childish flight of fancy.
For the thousandth time, Kai wished she understood her powers. She had prayed to Tsuki so many times when she was a child, but had never received an answer. As she got older, it began to dawn on her that the goddess might just be cold and impersonal, content to ruin her life and leave it at that. Kai hadn’t prayed in a long time.
I guess there is no harm in giving it one last try, she thought. Kai closed her eyes and bowed her head.
“Goddess Tsuki,” she said, clearing her dry throat. “I come to you humble, as I came into this world.” Goddesses want to be worshipped, right? She should throw in some of that. “Thank you for the wonderful gift you have given me, your power of the moon. But I do not know how to use it. Please . . .” Her voice cracked, sounding small in the emptiness. “Please, help me, so I can live.”
She opened her eyes and started, catching sight of a white blur in the distance. Kai sat very still, straining her eyes in the darkness.
There it was again! Her heart hammered in her throat. What could it be? She catalogued the list of animals that lived in the desert that could kill her. Manga cats, sand dragons, and scorpion birds. Those were all supposed to be old wives’ tales, told at night to scare the Ushai children into behaving. But, there was usually a grain of truth in stories, right?
She slowly picked up a rock from the ground next to her, its rough edge digging into her fingers as she gripped it tightly. Whatever it was, she wouldn’t go down without a fight.
Kai awoke with a start, brushing the gritty sand from her face and eyes. The rock had fallen from her hand in the night as she had eventually fallen asleep. She hadn’t seen the blur of white again.
She stood slowly, leaning on the rock for support. A stiff back and neck had been added to her list of pains, but they were the mildest of the group. She lifted one of her feet gingerly to examine the damage from the prior day’s trek and put it back down quickly. The sole of her foot was coated in packed sand and blood, her skin sliced beyond repair. Best not to think about that right now.
Part of her wanted to just sit by her rock shelter, and rest, and die. But she had to at least try to find water. Kai looked around, trying to get her bearings. The desert was deceiving, heat waves already rising off the hot sand. She knew the sun rose in the east, and so she set off, slowly, in the direction of Taiyo’s rising.
After a few hours, Kai reached a stand of three scraggly dead trees. Trees meant there had once been water. She dug and dug at their base, hoping to find something that she could live on. Her hopes sunk as she found only more sand.
She stood, and broke off a narrow white limb of one of the trees. It would be a good walking stick, or weapon, if she needed to defend herself.
As she walked, Kai thought about her prayer the night before. Tsuki hadn’t appeared to answer her. She wondered about the Gleaming. The powers of moonburners who were only a few hours old automatically reacted to save them when they were close to death. Was the same true of adult moonburners? Did she just have to get closer to death, and her powers would kick in to save her? Or were adult moonburners supposed to have learned to use their powers by now, so no more automatic reflexes would save them? She guessed she would find out soon enough.
Kai was shaken from her thoughts by a flash of white along the ground in the distance. She stopped and stood still, scanning the horizon where she had seen it. She shook her head. Nothing. Was she imagining things? How long did it take to go mad here?
Her slow walk continued, and the shadows of the day lengthened. Her thirst was becoming unbearable, her tongue huge and swollen in her mouth. Her tender skin blazed red from the constant sun and the burns on her back wept angrily.
Her thoughts flicked between her parents, marrying Ren and living a normal life, and killing Prefect Youkai. And then they fell silent, dulled by the fiery explosion of pain as she sank one foot after another into the hot sand.
Kai thought wistfully of her rock home from last night as the last rays of sunshine slipped over the horizon. A wind blew through the twilight, whipping fine sand against her body.
She closed her eyes to the grit and sunk to her knees where she stood. No further tonight. She dug a small indentation into the sand to shield her from the wind and curled into it, slipping into unconsciousness.
She woke when the moon was at its height. She laid very still, listening. She heard movement—the slippery sound of sand shifting down the side of a dune.
Footsteps. Sniffing. An animal. She saw her stick close by and reached for it slowly. The animal was coming closer. Her heart hammered in her throat.
Kai leaped up, brandishing her stick with a shout. She promptly staggered to her knees again as her head rushed with blood and pain. She was so weak and thirsty. She could hardly stand, let alone fight. She looked up wearily at whatever had come to eat her.
Two black eyes like marbles stared back at her from a silver face topped with pricked ears. It was a fox! It was as large as a medium-sized dog; much bigger than any fox she had ever seen. It was covered in pure silvery-white fur, the kind of fur that called out to be touched. Somehow she didn’t think the fox would appreciate that.
“Well, the battle cry was impressive, but I don’t know what you thought you were going to do with that stick.”
Kai slouched back on her heels, dumbfounded. She had gone mad. They said the desert could do it, and here was the proof. A talking silver fox. She started to laugh, first just a bubble, and then she broke into peals of laughter that sent tears streaming down her face. Her laughter subsided into a fit of coughing as her dry throat reminded her she hadn’t had anything to drink for two days.
The fox laid its ears back on its head and sat on its haunches. “That was rude.”
&nb
sp; “I’m sorry, Master Fox,” she said, clearing her throat. “I’ve just never spoken to a hallucination before.”
“I most certainly am not a hallucination. I am here to help you.” She paused, mouth open, about to speak.
Wait. What?
“I’m your seishen.”
CHAPTER 5
Kai didn’t dare hope that he was real.
“My seishen? My spirit guide?” She had heard of them. Legends told of animal companions that accompanied the most powerful sun and moonburners through life. It was supposed to be a true sign of honor from the gods to be gifted with such a partner. They were said to be very mysterious and very powerful.
“Yes, your seishen.”
“No offense, but how do I know you are not a figment of my imagination, or a dream?” Kai slowly inched her way towards him. She wanted to touch that fur.
“I am as real as you are.” “Prove it.”
He chuffed and blew out his cheeks in an adorable gesture that she interpreted as annoyance, but he approached her grubby outstretched hand and sat before her. Shaking, she drew her hand down the shiny fur of his back. He was warm and real. His fur was softer than the finest silk she had ever touched. She sprang forward and pulled him into a tight embrace, her arms locked around him tightly, her face buried in his soft fur. She rocked him back and forth.
“Kai . . .” a strangled voice came from beneath her chin. “Air . . .”
She released him and sat him down gently before her, embarrassed. His fur was askew in wild angles and she suppressed a laugh. “Thank you for coming.”
He shook himself and leveled an inscrutable gaze at her. “My name is Quitsu.”
Quitsu curled up in her arms in her little sand shelter to help her fall asleep. He had told her not to get used to it, but he would allow it tonight for survival purposes.
Kai had already begun to suspect that Quitsu’s bark was worse than his bite. He radiated heat into her like the cheerful embers of a once-roaring fire and she soaked in the first measure of comfort she had felt in two days and two nights. She fell asleep quickly.