by Elia Winters
“Oh, shit. Yeah. Sorry. I thought I was picking up my cell. What’s up?”
Scarlett took the phone away and looked at the screen, like that might give her any kind of answers, before putting it back to her ear. “I want to rent a room for tonight.”
“Okay. You can just show up.”
“You don’t need my credit card or anything?”
“Nah. You’re the only one here.” The guy yawned loudly. “What time will you be here? I’m probably gonna take a nap.”
Scarlett looked at the clock. “Early afternoon?”
“Sure. Sure.” He finished his yawn. “Okay. See ya.” And then he hung up.
Scarlett stared at the phone again. “What the fuck?”
“He didn’t need a credit card?”
“I’m not sure if he even works there.” Scarlett shook her head and tucked her phone back into the side-door pocket of the car. “It’s like bizarro world.”
“As long as we’ve got a room. I want a bed that won’t wreck my neck. I’m so sore from sleeping against the car door.”
“At least you got to sleep.” Scarlett was not bitter, but she couldn’t help pointing it out.
“You slept the whole morning,” Megan reminded her.
“An hour. I slept an hour.” Scarlett curled up into herself. “You mind if I look through your wallet?”
Megan glanced over. “I don’t know why you’d want to.”
“Something to do.”
“Don’t you have a book or something?”
Scarlett had an entire e-reader, and a phone full of mobile games, but she wasn’t in the mood for those. “You can just say no.”
“Sure, whatever. Knock yourself out.”
Megan’s wallet was quite neat. Her driver’s license was first, boasting a photo that didn’t even look bad. “Your driver’s license photo looks good.”
Megan wrinkled her nose. “Nobody likes their driver’s license photo.”
“Yeah, but you really look like this.” Scarlett tapped it.
“Don’t remind me.” Megan grimaced, and Scarlett put the card away.
She found Megan’s debit card, and put the credit card back behind it, and then started going through the rest. A medical insurance card. A gym membership card. “You go to the gym?”
Megan paused. “Not as often as I probably should.”
Scarlett put the card away. The next item was a membership card for a bulk store. She also carried a gas rewards card. The wallet had a hundred dollars in it in twenties, as well as ten ones and a single five. She had receipts neatly folded in half and tucked back there along with the money. One receipt was for Target, with a number of snacks listed, probably the snacks for the trip. Another was for Sephora. “What did you buy at Sephora?” She couldn’t picture Megan there.
“It says it on the receipt.” Megan’s tone was a little sharp.
There was a whole list of makeup items, but that wasn’t the point. “I mean, why did you buy makeup? You don’t wear makeup.”
“I know.” Megan seemed to hesitate, her lips parting in a thought. “I thought maybe I could try.” She was quick to qualify her statement. “I’ve worn it before. For special occasions. I just don’t do it regularly. I’m probably not very good at it.”
“I could teach you.” Scarlett didn’t know what she was doing offering, but makeup was one of the few things she did well. “If you wanted.”
The silence hung between them.
“Maybe. We’ll see.” Megan pressed her lips together in a thin line. “Do you want to sleep? I can turn the music off.”
Scarlett put the receipt back into Megan’s wallet and returned the wallet to its former place. “Leave the music. I like it.”
Megan smiled, a tiny curl of her lips, and Scarlett could live with that. She closed her eyes. Maybe she’d be able to doze.
* * *
As soon as Scarlett closed her eyes, Megan felt something relax inside her spine. Scarlett made her feel tense and uncomfortable somewhere deep inside. It wasn’t a horrified discomfort, or even an unpleasant one. It was hard to describe. She just felt like she couldn’t settle when those beautiful eyes were focused on her. Scarlett probably didn’t even know how beautiful she was, and that was obnoxious. Her amazing curly hair, her tanned skin dappled with freckles, those big brown eyes? It was ridiculous. Megan could never look that good. It had been a source of tension throughout their high school years, and now that she was away from Scarlett for a few years, those feelings were all crashing back over her again.
Help her with makeup. Like Megan had a chance of looking anywhere as good as Scarlett, even with the help of makeup. Scarlett hadn’t slept all night and she still looked like she was a tinted lip balm away from modeling in a commercial for moisturizer or something. Megan was always operating about one level above goblin. Without Scarlett watching her, though, with Scarlett’s eyes finally closed, Megan let herself relax. The music helped, soothing her bones. She was tired, sure, but she had the open road in front of her and the novelty of her trip still keeping her content.
The highway itself was boring, though, and so was the road she turned onto in order to head toward Myrtle Beach. There was nothing to see this time of year. It was cold, first of all, and all the trees had dropped their leaves, so bare gray branches surrounded the road, except for some misshapen pine trees that didn’t have any snow on them. Not that Megan had ever seen snow except in photos and videos, but it would be the better option for these trees. Not this nakedness.
Scarlett thought she was ridiculous for going to the beach, and maybe she was. The beach was going to be more of this austere nakedness. But in winter, the beach had a type of raw beauty that made Megan feel close to something bigger than herself. Scarlett could think what she wanted. Megan was going to get past worrying what Scarlett thought of her. The beach, with its cold beauty and gray, crisp light, was the perfect place to feel like she could find herself.
She hoped to find herself on this road trip. But she was all tangled up in thinking of Scarlett, and not about herself and what she wanted. Maybe with Scarlett sleeping, she could sit on the beach and gather her own thoughts. But they had to get there first.
Chapter Six
By the time they arrived in Myrtle Beach that afternoon, after almost five hours of driving from Tybee Island, Megan was starving and really sick of being in the car. The mediocre McDonalds breakfast sandwich was a long time ago. Scarlett had slept for the whole drive, or at least faked it, and Megan had listened to the same CD three times before switching to the radio and trying to find some likable local station. Eventually, she found a channel playing Led Zeppelin, and it was nearly enough to distract her from her stomach as she drove into downtown Myrtle Beach.
“Hey.” Megan slapped Scarlett’s arm. “Wake up.”
Scarlett jumped and made an undignified noise. “What the hell?” She rubbed her eyes. “Why’d you hit me?”
“We’re here. I want to eat.” Megan leaned forward to peer more closely at the buildings as they drove by. “Everything looks closed.”
Scarlett’s voice came out all mumbly. “Somebody’s got to be open. A diner or something.”
A diner. Megan had spent the last ten years of her life in a diner, and apparently she wasn’t going to escape. “Can you find one?”
“Just drive around until you see something,” Scarlett mumbled, tucking herself back into her ball.
Irritation flared up in Megan. “I haven’t eaten and I want some lunch.”
Scarlett sat back up and blinked owlishly over at her. “My god. You’re serious, aren’t you?” Grumbling, she straightened herself out and pulled the snack bag out of the back. “Here.” She handed her a granola bar. “Eat this. I’ll find us some place for lunch.”
Megan grimaced at the granola bar, but Scarlett was probably right th
at she should eat something rather than nothing, and she took it.
“This is your second new state.” Scarlett stifled a yawn. “I have to pee.”
“We can pee when we get to lunch.” Megan had to go, too, but she was determined to get the prospect of food figured out first.
Scarlett directed them to a local restaurant a few blocks over, and Megan pulled in right up front. That was one nice thing about being in a beach town on the off-season: easy parking.
They got a booth near the door, and after using the bathroom, returned to their table to stare at each other across the expanse of table between them. Megan looked around her at the familiar decor.
“Whatcha thinking?” Scarlett asked.
Megan grimaced. “It looks like the Starlite.”
“All diners kind of look alike.” Scarlett’s tone was apologetic, surprisingly. “Too many bad memories?”
“They’re not bad memories. Just memories.” Megan looked into her glass of ice water like it might give her the answers. “I grew up there. And now it’s going to be a Winn-Dixie expansion. I dunno.” She shrugged one shoulder. “I guess things change.”
“Things are supposed to change.” Scarlett’s tone was blunt, like she often tended to be. “You can’t hold them back.”
“I know.”
Megan was saved from having to say more by the waitress’s arrival. She looked like every waitress at a local diner in the off-season: bored, friendly because of obligation, distant but professional. “Can I help y’all?”
Scarlett ordered, and then it was Megan’s turn. Despite having the menu and having made up her mind a while ago, Megan suddenly had a thought flash to mind. “I’ll have...the turkey club, and some fried green tomatoes as an appetizer.”
The waitress left. “I’ve never had those,” Megan announced, because she felt like she should. “Fried green tomatoes, I mean.”
“Okay?” Scarlett was looking at her like she was being weird again. “Why do I need to know this?”
“You don’t. I thought, though, that I should try something new.” Megan found herself saying more though she wasn’t planning on it. “I feel like I should try something new as often as I can on this trip.”
Scarlett stifled another yawn. “You do you, I guess.”
She may not care, but Megan did. Making this assertion out loud felt like an important first step. Maybe this was how she learned to do more with her life. Maybe she could step beyond her comfort zone in more ways than just this road trip.
Scarlett didn’t need to approve. She didn’t need Scarlett’s admiration or approval; she just needed to keep moving forward on her own. Fuck approval.
And yet.
And yet.
“Why are you still living in Florida?” Megan asked.
Scarlett looked across the table, her expression shifting from cautious to aloof. “It’s cheap. I told you that.” She took a sip of her water. Her red nail polish was chipping. It was such a weird detail to notice, a bit of vulnerability, a crack in Scarlett’s armor. Megan felt defensive, and she hated feeling defensive.
“Lots of places are cheap,” Megan said, pushing a bit.
Scarlett seemed to consider the comment, and then gave a bit of a half-shrug. “I used to think I wanted to get out. I thought there was nothing for me in Florida.”
“Is that why you moved to New York?”
Scarlett smiled, but it was a bitter smile, the kind of smile with no amusement in it. She looked down at her chipped fingernails for a long time. “Sure. That was part of it.”
Megan wanted to ask about the rest of it, but she knew Scarlett wouldn’t tell her. “But you came back.”
“I came back.” Scarlett nodded. “And I’ll probably stay. I think Florida is in my blood, now.” She let out a long sigh. “What about you? You ever think about moving away?”
Megan snorted. “Doesn’t everybody?”
“I mean seriously. Did you ever seriously consider it?”
Megan had, sometimes, when another stilted relationship left her alone again, when Matt was being a particularly vocal douchebag, when her parents hinted that she might want to do something different with her life...back before they stopped caring or commenting at all. But she’d never done it. She’d never felt like it was worth the effort. Wouldn’t every place be the same?
“Now and then. But I don’t like being far away from everything I care about.” Megan shifted on the slick vinyl of her chair.
“What do you care about?”
Megan looked down at the laminate table, anywhere but at Scarlett’s searching gaze. She cared about her family, of course, even her asshole brother, and she cared about her book group and the gym she didn’t attend often enough, but none of those seemed like the right answers. “I like stability,” she said. “Maybe I like it too much.”
“Nothing wrong with stability.”
Megan gave a little half-laugh, thinking of all the ways her life was losing stability by the day. “I threw my brother out of the house.”
Scarlett raised her eyebrows. “Really?”
“Yeah.” Megan flushed with the emotions running through her, remembered pride mixing with the irritation she still got when she thought about it. “I told him he had until I got back from this trip to move out.”
Scarlett whistled. “You think he’ll trash the house in retaliation?”
Megan had considered it. “I think he’s too lazy for that. I think he’ll take the path of least resistance and move in with my parents or one of his friends.”
“The path of least resistance is probably just to stay put in your house and see if you’re bluffing.” Scarlett took a sip of her water. “Unless you’ve stood up to him before.”
“I don’t think he’d do that. I think he knows I’m serious.” Megan remembered the way his expression had faded from anger to something like resignation and exasperation, portraying himself as a victim in his own mind once again. He always did that.
The waitress returned with Megan’s fried green tomatoes, which looked like golden-brown disks sitting next to some kind of pink sauce. She frowned at them. She had never been one for trying new foods, but then again, she’d never been one for trying much of anything. Across the table, Scarlett watched her slice one of them in half.
It crunched in her mouth, breading and then the sour underripe tomato, and it wasn’t unpleasant but she wasn’t sure how she felt about it yet. She dipped the second half in the sauce, and that was much nicer. She didn’t realize she was smiling until Scarlett smiled back, tentatively. “What?” Megan asked, a little flare of self-consciousness rising up inside her.
“I just...like seeing you happy.” Scarlett looked away, leaving Megan with weird feelings that she couldn’t quite explain. Megan shoved the dish toward her.
“Here. Eat some of these.”
Their conversation was actually pleasant for the rest of lunch, and eventually, Megan let her guard down enough to relax. It helped that she was so tired she had a hard time maintaining her walls. As she ate, she started to feel like she might even have some affection for Scarlett. Those were dangerous feelings, the kind that got people hurt, and she tried to rein them in. But when she yawned for what might be the fifth time since finishing her sandwich, Scarlett smiled at her across the table, a gentle smile that made a soft warmth spread throughout Megan’s chest.
“We should get a room,” Scarlett said.
When Megan blinked a few times at her, Scarlett blushed, color coming to her cheeks. “Not like that.”
Megan smiled lazily, tired enough not to second-guess playing along. “Sure. You’re just trying to get me into bed, aren’t you?”
Scarlett flushed more. “You definitely need some sleep. Let me get the check.”
* * *
Megan dozed off as soon as Scarlett pulled out of the dine
r’s parking lot. Scarlett turned the GPS sound down low and followed the directions to the Pink Sands Inn, which fortunately was only a few miles away. She should probably wake Megan up, since she wasn’t going to be able to sleep for long, but didn’t have the heart to do it. When she slept, she looked so innocent and vulnerable. The real Megan was neither. She was sharp-witted and ready to defend herself, like an armadillo covered in heavy plates of armor. Like this, sleeping on the passenger seat of the Toyota, though, Megan might as well be exposing her soft undersides.
Not that thinking about Megan’s soft undersides was a good plan. Scarlett’s gaze drifted to Megan’s breasts, the gentle swell pushing out against her sweatshirt with every breath, and she dragged her attention back to the road before she drove into a ditch. She had to steady her breathing. Maybe it was the lack of sleep, but her feelings for Megan that she could always keep under wraps were much more resistant to being kept under wraps right now.
The Pink Sands Inn looked sort of like its website, although it was somewhat less flattering when viewed head-on instead of at an artful angle with the sunset illuminating the stucco, like it had been on the internet. Scarlett pulled into a spot and had a moment’s crisis. Megan was going to pay for the hotel, but Megan was asleep. Scarlett could just...take her card and check in, but was that okay, or another breach of trust?
She was saved from having to make the decision by Megan jerking awake all at once, startling into alertness. Staring wildly around, she seemed to take a minute to realize where she was before nodding at herself and stifling another yawn. “Sorry. How long was I out?”
“Only about five minutes. We’re here. You want to come in with me?” Scarlett jerked her thumb at the front door. “You’ve got the credit card.”
“Right.” Megan got out, fumbling a bit with the door as she did so.
The outside air bit into Scarlett’s face as she stepped out into the chilly afternoon. The day was bright and clear, and the crispness woke her up as she led Megan inside. Megan, though, didn’t look very awake at all. She had a sort of half-asleep grumpiness that made Scarlett smile. Megan grunted a quiet thanks as Scarlett opened the door for her.