by R. C. Ryan
Instead of backing away as it had in the beginning, the mustang merely stood watching as Casey let himself out of the stall.
Once latched, Casey halted next to Kirby and leaned his arms on the rail. “I think she’s ready to return to her herd.”
“Really?”
He nodded. “I’ll take her back to the hills where I found her and turn her loose. But not for a few days. I intend to give her extra portions of food to fatten her up for the looming winter, when she’ll have to forage for food through a lot of snow.”
“Her herd could be miles away by now.”
“It doesn’t matter. Instinct will take over. She’ll find them. Or they’ll find her.”
Kirby smiled up at Casey. “I hope Dr. Peterson gives me permission to remove this boot. I’d love to go with you when you head up to the hills.”
“In that case, I’ll wait until you visit the clinic.”
“You mean it?”
He tugged on a lock of her hair. “I can’t think of anybody I’d rather have along on my hike than you, Sunshine.” He dipped his head and brushed a quick kiss over her mouth.
She absorbed a rush of heat that left her weak.
His hands moved to her shoulders and he gathered her close before lowering his head. “That was nice. Mind if I try that again?”
She lifted her face in invitation.
His mouth moved on hers, setting off an explosion of fireworks behind her closed eyelids.
Her hands automatically wrapped around his waist. Holding on for fear of falling, she gave herself up to the pure pleasure.
He changed the angle of the kiss, taking it deeper.
Oh, the man knew how to kiss; his mouth firm on hers, his hands moving along her back, lighting fires everywhere he touched.
As the kiss spun on and on, Kirby was engulfed in a wave of heat that had her knees buckling.
She took a quick step back while continuing to hold on to him. “Wait.”
He lifted a hand to her cheek. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” She swallowed, and it sounded overly loud in her ears. “We need to…I need to think.”
“Okay.” He paused. “Is it something I said? Something I did?”
“No.” She looked away.
He cupped her chin, forcing her to look at him. “Want to talk?”
She shook her head. “Not yet. I just…need some time.”
He seemed to give that some thought before saying, “Okay. Come on.” Taking her hand, he led her out the barn.
On the walk back to the house, she waited for his questions, but he remained as silent as she. The only sounds were the crunch of their footsteps in the snow and the wild thundering of her heart.
They paused in the mudroom to deposit their boots and parkas before walking to the stairway.
He took her hands. “I’ll see you at dinner.”
She nodded and turned away, hating the questions she could read in his eyes. She was grateful that he didn’t push her for answers.
Once in her room she dropped to the edge of her bed, her mind in turmoil.
Hearing voices downstairs, she marveled at how this group of strangers had become like long-lost friends. And one among them had become much more than that, though she didn’t want to dwell on that fact, for fear of jinxing it.
That kiss in the barn had been simple enough. And yet it had rocked her world. She’d felt the sexual jolt all the way to her toes.
She’d like to think Casey had felt it, too. Or was it different for him?
Oh, how she wished she’d had siblings to talk to. She hoped she wasn’t making too much of this. But a cowboy as confident as Casey Merrick would be an expert on women. And though she’d had her share of boyfriends, she’d had no experience with the conflicting emotions she’d been experiencing since meeting Casey.
Maybe it was because of all the things that had happened in such a short span of time. Her uncle’s death. Her move back to Wyoming. The fall in the hills. The avalanche.
Those experiences should have been enough for a lifetime. But then there’d been the theft of her truck and the trashing of her apartment, all done by an escaped convict still on the loose.
And yet, whenever she thought about everything that had occurred, the most amazing thing of all was simply…that handsome cowboy downstairs.
He was funny and smart and thoughtful, and when they were together, she felt happy and hopeful.
Careful, she warned herself. Things were moving too fast. If she didn’t use her common sense, she could find herself in over her head and drowning. With no lifeline to latch on to.
That was why she’d pulled back, out there in the barn. She knew if she hadn’t, they’d still be out there, taking that kiss to its inevitable conclusion. And though she’d wanted that, a part of her knew she wasn’t ready.
Why? What was it about Casey Merrick that forced her to push the pause button?
Because, she thought, he was unlike any guy she’d ever known. And though she thought of herself as sane and sensible, the truth was she was head-over-heels crazy about him.
There. She’d admitted it. And though she didn’t know what to do about these feelings, she knew one thing. If this was love, it wasn’t the warm, fuzzy feelings poets wrote about. Instead she felt scared, confused, and honestly miserable, all at the same time. She loved being with him. In fact, she cherished every minute they had together, but she felt edgy, too, as though she were on the very edge of something monumental.
Maybe that was part of the problem.
A part of her wanted to just give in to the feelings and see where they took her. Another part of her wanted to continue to be the smart, strong, independent woman she’d always been so proud to be. And she was terrified that by giving in to these wild yearnings, she would somehow lose herself.
She stood and began pacing. Why couldn’t she be like her girlfriends Kat and Evie and Remmy back in DC? Her friends had gone through a string of boyfriends, and they seemed more than happy to simply enjoy the journey, no matter where the train finally stopped.
Why did she have to be so damned cautious?
Annoyed at where her thoughts had taken her, she stripped and stepped under the shower, hoping some of those new clothes would lift her spirits.
Over a late supper Chet turned to Casey. “Your dad and I are heading up to the highlands in the morning to winterize the range shacks. Want to lend a hand?”
Casey nodded. “I’m in.”
“Hey.” Brand looked up. “What about me?”
Chet shrugged. “I figured you’d want some alone time with your bride.”
“I love my alone time.” He brushed a kiss over Avery’s cheek. “But heading into the hills to close up the range shacks for the winter is a family tradition.”
Jonah nodded. “I agree. And I’m available, too.”
“Good.” Chet was grinning. “The more willing workers, the faster we get it done.” He turned to Billy. “You might want to send along some chow. We never know what sort of weather we’ll find up in the hills.”
“You bet.” Billy sipped his coffee, and the others could see the wheels turning in his mind, already mentally planning what to cook and pack.
Casey turned to Kirby. “When do you meet with Dr. Peterson?”
“Four days and eight hours.”
Her words had everyone around the table laughing.
“Not that you’re keeping score,” Casey said with a wink.
Their laughter grew, while Kirby’s heart hitched at that simple wink of an eye.
“I’ll be back in plenty of time to drive you,” Casey assured her.
“If you’re not,” Avery said, “I’m happy to take her to town.”
Kirby merely smiled, hoping Casey would be back in time, but aware that she’d just been given several days to clear her mind, without having that sexy cowboy around to muddy the waters.
Kirby awoke to doors slamming, voices calling, and the sound of engines revvi
ng. As she descended the stairs, she glanced outside to see a horse trailer hitched to a stake truck. The men were busy loading supplies and several horses were being led up a ramp. In the back of the truck, snowmobiles were secured, as well as bales of hay, tools, and coolers neatly labeled and secured with bungee cords.
When she arrived outside, the first thing she saw was Avery and Brand standing close together. At the look in their eyes, Kirby felt a shiver of warmth. They were so in tune, it seemed as though they’d been together for a lifetime, rather than still newlyweds.
Casey ambled over to tug on a lock of Kirby’s hair. “You going to miss me, Sunshine?”
“I’ll probably be way too busy having fun with your sister-in-law, your aunt, and your grandmother. We’re going to have several days of girl time.”
“Yeah,” he agreed, smiling into her eyes.
Though his smile remained, something flickered in his eyes before he ducked his head and brushed a kiss over her mouth.
It was the briefest of kisses, but it shot an arrow clear through her heart, leaving her stunned.
She put a hand to his chest. “Hey. Watch what you’re doing, cowboy.”
His sexy grin was back. “Just hoping it’ll give you a reason to miss me, at least a little, because I’m going to miss the hell out of you.”
Before she could respond he sauntered away and climbed into the truck.
As the trucks pulled away, everyone called out their farewells. Casey waved to his family, then looked beyond them to where Kirby stood alone.
She could feel the heat of his touch as surely as if he were still kissing her. She couldn’t help touching a finger to the warmth of her lips.
She caught his quick grin before the vehicle turned and all she could see was the back of his head.
He lifted a hand out the open window and she had the crazy urge to race alongside the truck and grab hold.
She stood until it was out of sight before turning away.
She was going to have to do something about her foolish heart.
Chapter Twenty
The men gathered around a blazing campfire, polishing off a supper of Billy’s beef stew, biscuits, and beer. Leaning their backs against their saddles, or the logs neatly stacked for winter, they stretched their long legs toward the warmth of the fire, ignoring the snowflakes that dusted their hair and clothes.
Bo looked around with pride. “This was a good day, boys. We got a lot done.”
Chet nodded in agreement. “Yeah. I figure another day at the north cabin, and we can rest easy for the winter.”
Jonah gave a dry laugh. “Or as easy as possible while we use the next couple of months repairing our equipment, taking stock of our herds, and gearing up for spring calving, which always seems to come before we’ve had a chance to catch our breath.”
The others chuckled.
Bo gave a solemn shake of his head. “Ham always warned me: Nobody ever said ranching would be easy. If it was, we wouldn’t have so many ranches going up on the auction block.”
“Ranching. You either love it or hate it,” Chet muttered.
“Good thing everyone here loves it.” At Casey’s statement, the others grinned.
Feeling mellow, Brand took a long pull on his beer. “I’m loving it a whole lot more since Avery came into my life.” He shook his head, “And that’s quite a statement, considering how good I was at being alone until I met her.”
On the other side of the fire, Bo smiled as he stared at the dancing flames. “Love is a crazy emotion, son. One minute you’re alone, without a thought to anything but today. Then you meet a woman who turns your life completely upside down, and you find yourself making plans for the future. And instead of resenting this intrusion in your life, you find yourself using any excuse to be alone with her. And then, once you know she’s the one, you can’t imagine your life without her.”
Hearing the unexpected emotion in his father’s voice, Casey couldn’t help asking, “How did you survive losing Mom?”
Bo continued staring into the fire, as though seeing his beloved Leigh’s face in every dancing flame. “I’m still hanging on by my fingernails, son. There are days when it doesn’t seem possible that she’s been gone since you boys were just tykes. Other days, it feels like a bad dream that will end when I wake up and she’ll come walking in the door. Even now I can see her so clearly, and smell that perfume she always wore.” He slowly shook his head in disbelief. “From the first day I met her, I knew she was the one.”
The others fell silent, knowing that for this very private man to bare his soul was something so rare that he was probably already regretting his words.
He tipped up his beer, draining it before getting quickly to his feet. “It’s been a good day, but a long one. Think I’ll turn in now.”
Chet stood. “Time for me to do the same. ’Night, all.”
Within minutes Brand and Jonah followed their lead, heading toward their beds.
At the door to the range shack Jonah turned to see Casey sitting alone, staring pensively into the flames. “You coming?”
“I’m going to finish my beer. I’ll be along in a minute.”
When the door closed, Casey remained sitting against his saddle while thoughts of Kirby filled his mind, as they had so often lately.
What was it about her that had him so tied up in knots? Maybe it was the fact that she’d come out of nowhere. He’d taken himself off to the high country to be alone, and then suddenly there she was, bursting into his cave, intruding on his privacy. But what should have felt like an invasion had felt instead like an unexpected treat. And when he’d brought her home, she’d fit right in with his big, noisy family. Living alone with an uncle would not have prepared her for the Merrick family flash mob, and yet, she’d been able to go with the flow.
He downed the rest of his beer and grinned at the snowflakes tickling his face. Kirby was like those snowflakes. Soft, gentle, cool. He loved the way her eyes danced with humor at the strangest times. Like when Ham started in on one of his rants. All Casey had to do was glance over at Kirby, and he could almost hear the soft lilt of her laughter, though her features remained completely composed.
He loved the fact that she was comfortable being with him and his brothers. Ranch life didn’t intimidate her. Neither did things like shopping with Avery and Gram Meg. She fit in so easily with his family, it was as though she’d been born here.
But it wasn’t any of those things that he thought of when he was with her. What he thought of—all he thought of—was taking her in his arms and driving her slowly mad with the passion he could sense simmering just below that calm surface.
The way she responded to his kiss and his touch told him, more than any words, that she was doing her best to hold him at arm’s length in order to keep from losing control.
What would it be like, he wondered, to see her let down her guard completely and just ride the wild tide of passion?
He was having a hard time controlling his own desire when he was around her. The thought of lying with her, doing all the things he wanted, made him restless. But the choice had to be hers. And if she didn’t choose soon, he’d probably go stark raving mad.
He crushed the can in his hand before he realized what he’d done.
Slowly he got to his feet and turned toward the cabin. He knew his body craved sleep, but his mind was running on overdrive, and all he could think of was Kirby. The way she looked. The way she tasted. The way she felt in his arms.
He knew it was going to be a long, sleepless night.
After saying good night to the others, Kirby and Avery retired to the family room. Drawing their chairs close to the fireplace, they propped their feet on a shared footstool.
“Oh, this is nice.” Kirby leaned back, enjoying the warmth of the fire while she sipped her tea.
Avery smiled. “Have I told you how happy I am that you’re here?” At Kirby’s look of surprise she added, “It’s nice to have someone my age to talk to.
Since moving to Wyoming I’ve been burning up the internet gabbing with girlfriends back in Michigan.”
“Was it a hard adjustment moving here?”
Avery chuckled. “You mean, being loved by my very own sexy cowboy? Living in this fabulous house that’s as big as a hotel, and having gourmet meals served on a daily basis? What’s not to love?”
Kirby shrugged. “When you put it that way…”
The two women shared a laugh.
“But still,” Kirby persisted, “you left a part of your life behind.”
“Not really. I probably talk to my father more now that I’ve moved across the country than I did when we were working in the same hospital. Then, we were barely speaking. Now, he’s like a new man, asking my opinion on everything from when he should plan on a visit here to whether or not I think he should try dating at his age.”
“What did you tell him?”
“Visit next summer, when the hills are alive with wildflowers. And as for dating, he’ll never know until he tries it.” She brought her hands to her eyes. “But I’m hoping he doesn’t share that part of his life with me. Too much information for a daughter.”
The two giggled merrily.
“Speaking of too much information…” Avery stirred sugar into her tea. “I’ve never seen Casey so…mellow. The two of you seem to be getting along.”
Kirby looked at her. “Is there a question in that statement?”
Avery held up a hand. “Sorry. I know it’s none of my business. But I can’t help it. Now that I’m part of the family, I just have to ask. Are you two getting serious?”
Kirby frowned. “I wish I knew.”
“What does that mean?”
“I don’t know what we are.” Kirby ran a finger around the rim of her cup. “There’s a definite attraction. But I have no idea if it means anything, or if Casey is just another good-looking guy only interested in the chase. I’m afraid that the minute we act on our feelings, he’ll be ready to move on.”
“Maybe he’s thinking the same thing about you.”