by L. Divine
“I wanted to chill,” I say. I opted for my black Old Navy roll-up cargo pants and a pink top with some sneakers. Casual is how I’m feeling about everything in my life at this moment. I performed a miniature head cleansing on myself during my shower. I read in Maman’s stories about cleansing after separations. And I do feel much lighter than I did a few hours ago. I’m also glad my girls are here and we’re going to hang out with my boys. Life is still good, with or without a boyfriend.
“There’s chilling, and then there’s just not caring,” Mickey says, gesturing toward her body, which displays her gold jacket and belt, with the high mules to match. Her jeans are much tighter than the ones I wore to work today, and I’m sure Nigel will find her outfit very appealing. “Girl, if you’re going to get Rah back, you’ve got to step it up a notch. Them heffas at Westingle don’t play when it comes to gear.” Mickey’s right, but I’ve never been one to care about what the status quo is wearing or doing. And it’s time for that side of Jayd to come out more. This entire school year has been about what other people think, but that’s over. It’s time for people to know the real me and for me to stop second-guessing myself.
“Jayd doesn’t care what those girls are wearing. She’s prettier and smarter than all of them combined,” Nellie says, looking the preppiest of us all in her capri pants and formfitting top. She still looks thin, but her color’s coming back, and she looks happier than I’ve seen her since she got that godforsaken crown.
“Well, thank you, Nellie,” I say, just happy to climb into the backseat of the Regal behind my girls. “And for the record, Mickey, I’m not trying to get Rah back. I’m actually feeling good about not having a man right now.”
“Is that right?” Mickey says, sounding unconvinced. “So that’s why you’re now sporting the same purse that you just broke up with your ex-man over.”
“Let’s just say it was a little parting gift. Besides, you’re right—I did earn this bag,” I say, giving me and my girls a good laugh. And with my job on the line, I don’t know when I’ll be able to afford a nice bag like this one. If Jeremy wants to give it to me, I’ll take it, especially now that we’re not together. At least he now knows that bribes don’t always work to his advantage.
“I hear you, girl. But I still think you should give Rah another shot. He really loves you,” Mickey says as we pull up behind Nigel’s Impala. Rah’s Acura isn’t in the driveway; he must’ve stepped out.
“Jayd,” Kamal says as we walk up the side path toward the back door of the garage turned studio. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
“I’m glad to see you, too, little man,” I say, kissing him on the head.
“Hi, Nellie and Mickey. Rah went to the store. He’ll be right back, but Nigel and Chance are kicking it already,” Kamal says.
“Well, aren’t you a good little host,” I say as we follow him inside.
“Now we can get this party started,” Nigel says, changing the music from some of their beats to Peaches & Herb’s “Reunited.”
“Nigga, you crazy,” Mickey says, kissing her man and landing in his lap on the sofa next to Chance. Nigel’s eyes look pleased at her outfit, just as I anticipated.
“Hey, Chance,” Nellie says, overly enthusiastic to see him. Maybe after all she’s been through with Tania, and with Chance by her side during it all, she’s starting to value him for the real friend he is in her life and not just someone to use. She takes a seat next to him on the couch as he nods “what’s up” to me. With everyone coupled off, I take a seat at Rah’s desk and look around at my friends. Although we have our problems, I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.
“Rah, it’s about time you got back,” Nigel says, looking toward the back door. As he walks into the room headed straight for me, my heart begins to beat so fast I swear it’s going to leap out of my chest.
“What’s up, everyone?” Rah says as he picks up the remote controlling our soundtrack. “I want y’all to hear some new shit we came up with this afternoon.” He smiles at me and kisses me with his eyes.
“Yeah, Jayd, I know you’re going to love it,” Nigel says. He and Mickey are smiling so big I know something’s up. The melodic bass line gets us all in a chill mood before they even start rolling their blunts and sipping their drinks. Rah has mad skills in the studio.
“Where are the words?” Nellie says, stating the obvious as Chance starts the session by taking the first puff.
“All we’ve got is the hook so far. Here it comes,” Rah says, turning the volume up. “The title is ‘A Gangster’s Dream.’ ” As the beat continues, Nigel’s hypnotic voice raps the hook, “You might be a weak boy’s nightmare, but you’re a gangster’s dream,” for Rah’s new beat, and I’m speechless as everyone looks at me and then Rah, awaiting our responses.
“I don’t mean to talk about your boy,” Nigel says, accepting Chance’s pass before continuing, “but that White boy was stupid if he thought there was something wrong with you, Jayd.”
“Nigel’s right,” Chance says, finally stepping up and being the big brother I’ve always known him to be. “Jeremy isn’t good enough for you, and I love him like a brother.”
“Yeah, but you already knew that, didn’t you, queen,” Rah says, taking me by the hand as he kneels in front of me. “You’re too strong for him but just right for me.” He kisses my hands and sits down on the floor in between my legs before handing me the small paper bag holding a Snickers bar and black rubber bands for his hair. As I massage his scalp before braiding his thick crown, I know this feels too good to be temporary. However this reality plays itself out, I’m down for the ride.
Epilogue
With my mom still gone for the night, I decided to fall asleep on Rah’s fold-out couch with the rest of my crew. As tired as I am, I still can’t get any restful sleep. Luckily I’ve decided to go into work late, so I can sleep in a little longer if need be. Just as I fall into a semi-peaceful slumber, my dream begins, and it’s anything but serene.
The shiny black Monte Carlo pulls up alongside the football field, causing the few people in the bleachers to take notice of the classic vehicle tweaked out with limo tint. The license plate reads G 4 LIFE, and I know it’s my girl’s man without the confirmation apparent on her petrified face. What’s Mickey’s boyfriend doing at football practice? He’s never been up here before, not even to escort her to a dance, not that she usually goes to them all. This can’t be good.
When Nigel and the other players return from their water break, the windows on the almost cloaked vehicle open, and someone starts to shout out at Nigel.
“Nigel!” Mickey shouts, but not before her man steps out of the vehicle and rushes to the field with two other dudes right behind him. Mickey runs onto the field from where we’re seated on the sidelines, and I follow with Nellie and Chance right behind us. Unfortunately Rah’s nowhere in sight, and we’re no match for Mickey’s man and his crew.
“Jayd, you still going to work?” Rah says, whispering in my ear as the rest of our friends still sleep. We’ve been lying here for hours.
“Yeah,” I whisper back. Should I tell him about my dream right now?
“I’ll take you back to your mom’s and then to work whenever you’re ready,” he says, falling back into place next to me on the crowded bed. What am I going to do about Mickey’s man snatching Nigel up at school?
Remember what I told you, Jayd: separate your emotions from your visions. Then you’ll be able to master your powers, my mom says. She must not be having a very good time in Vegas if she’s got time to be all up in my head.
I always have time for my baby, she says, still here. I’ve got a lot of work to do on myself. And, even with Rah back in my life, he doesn’t need to be my man. Not yet, anyway. It’s time for some me time, and I’m ready to claim my powerful heritage fully—fiery attitude, drama and all. And I must do it alone, for now.
A Reading Group Guide
Drama High, Volume 4:
FRENEMIES
> L. Divine
ABOUT THIS GUIDE
The following questions are intended to
enhance your group’s reading of
DRAMA HIGH: FRENEMIES
by L. Divine.
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. Who is Rah to Jayd? How has his presence affected Jayd’s life? Is his influence a positive, negative, or both?
2. Is Mickey being a good friend to Nellie or is she jealous, as Nellie accuses? How does Jayd deal with her friends being at war?
3. How has Nellie’s crown changed her behavior and the way that people respond to her? What is it about Nellie’s attitude that irritates both Jayd and Mickey?
4. How does Jayd bargain her way out of a day of A.P. meetings? Does Jayd benefit from being in the A.P. program?
5. How did Jayd find out about Tania’s pregnancy and that Jeremy’s the father? What was her initial reaction to the news?
6. How have Lynn Marie’s powers affected her and Jayd’s relationship? Do you think it’s an invasion of privacy? If so, is this a good thing?
7. What did Jayd do to help her friends? Did her actions work as she had expected?
8. How does Jeremy’s father feel about black women? What would happen to the Weiner boys, Jeremy in particular, if they were to have babies with their current girlfriends?
9. Is Jeremy’s love for Jayd real? Is the love that Jayd feels for Jeremy equal to the love she feels for Rah?
10. Why does Jeremy’s comment about black religion bother Jayd so much? Do you agree with his comment?
11. How do Mama and their spiritual lineage influence Jayd’s everyday life?
12. What was the breaking point that ended Jeremy and Jayd’s relationship? Do you think they should try and work it out or stay separated for good?
13. What was the hook for Rah’s latest beat? Why do you think he wrote these lyrics for Jayd?
Stay tuned for the next book
in the DRAMA HIGH series
LADY J
Until then, satisfy your DRAMA HIGH craving
with the following excerpt from
the next exciting installment.
ENJOY!
Prologue
After my dream this morning about Mickey’s man jumping Nigel, I never did get back to sleep. Rah made me breakfast and took me home to get dressed before taking me to work this morning. He’s such a sweety. But the sweetness ended when he started to get repeat text messages and calls from his girl Trina, snapping me into the reality of the situation: if I want to be with Rah, I’ll have to deal with being the other woman always, because I don’t see him changing his ways anytime soon. I respect his Muslim culture, but I ain’t down with the multiple wives thang. That reality doesn’t suit me at all.
Thank goodness my mom’s picking me up from work in a few minutes. I’ve never been so tired in my life, not even when Mama keeps me up all night working in the spirit room. I think it’s my job wearing me down. I’m starting to feel like the people I see going to work on the bus every day: miserable.
“So how was your trip?” I ask as my mom pulls off the curb towards Inglewood. She decided to pick me up from work so she can get me back to Mama’s early. I guess her and Carl have a followup to their Vegas date later this evening. Girls in general are a trip when they get a new man. And my mom’s no exception to the rule.
“It was wonderful,” my mom says, her green eyes sparkling over her Versace shades. They must be a gift from her new man because I know they’re not in her budget. “But the date’s not over yet. We’re going to The Cheesecake Factory for dinner, so you’ve got ten minutes to get your stuff when we get back, okay? I’ll wait for you downstairs.” Damn, it’s like that? It seems like second nature for women to put a guy as top priority when he’s around. That’s exactly why, no matter how much I may love Rah, I’ve decided not to have a man right now. Who needs the drama?
“I do, and so does every other woman I know including you, little miss thang,” my mom says telepathically. I hate when she does that.
“If you don’t like it, then speak what’s on your mind, shawty,” she says, again without moving her lips.
“Okay then fine,” I say, still vexed from having to work under Marty again today. I have to find a new job and soon. “How come every time a new dude pops up I become second in line?” I say, feeling the pain of my words knot in my throat. Whenever I get emotional I want to cry. My mom sees it as a sign of weakness, so I try not to let it happen too often in front of her and this time is no exception.
“You’re never second, Jayd,” my mom says, as she speeds down La Brea like it’s the Autobahn. “But, between work and you on the weekends, I never have enough time to just be me,” she says, sounding like the self-absorbed Lynn Marie that Mama always talks about. From the time I could remember, which has been basically all of my life, Mama has called my mother selfish and materialistic without hesitation. I used to defend my mother until I got a little older and understood that Mama was telling the truth; otherwise my mom would have raised me herself. I try not to blame her too much. Although it’s times like these that make me rethink my forgiving attitude.
“Oh Jayd, I know you think I’m selfish and you’re right,” she says, turning onto her street and unlocking the doors before stopping the car. “But honestly, Jayd, you’ve been able to take care of yourself since you were very young. When you get older you’ll appreciate having such an independent mother. No matter how Mama may feel about it, I know you came to me because you knew who I was before we met. I used to talk to you in the womb all of the time and you responded. I know you heard me, so don’t act like this is news,” she says, touching my hand and looking into my eyes. If it weren’t for their colors, our eyes would be identical.
“I know Mom, I know,” I say, opening the car door and exiting before she makes me cry. I can actually remember having dreams about talking to my mother from inside of her belly. Mama says it’s typical for me and other babies born with cauls to have memories revealed through dreams, even into our past lives. Caught up in my thoughts, I trip on the curb, splashing the murky drain water onto my Nikes and accidentally causing the car door to get stuck on the sidewalk.
“Okay, then. So don’t be so salty when I want to go out. It’s all for you baby. And be careful with that door,” she says, forcing a sarcastic smirk across my face. My mom’s nothing if not honest about who she is, and I definitely admire her for that. With or without a king-man, my mom’s a queen. And I, being her daughter, wear a similar crown and deserve more than what any of these dudes around here are offering me now. I know I can do better on my own and that’s just what I intend to do.
1
Cruise Control
“I’m not here for your entertainment/
You don’t really want to mess with me.”
—PINK
I don’t mind being back on the bus and hiking the near mile it takes to get to school every morning. The brisk morning air feels refreshing against my cheeks. I can tell my legs have become a little weak from the daily rides with Jeremy. But, I doubt I’ll still receive that privilege now that we’re no longer an item. I feel awful about our breakup. I do still have feelings for him, but not as strong as I do for Rah. Speaking of which, here’s a text from him now. I’ll hit him back later. Right now I want to mentally prepare for my day while hiking up this steep-ass hill—no distractions allowed.
As the procession of fancy cars passes me up toward South Bay High, I notice Misty walking up ahead of me on the other side of the street. I guess her mom’s running late this morning and couldn’t give her a ride, which isn’t that unusual. I saw her on the three bus rides it takes to get here, but luckily they were all packed as usual, forcing a safe distance between us.
I’m still surprised Misty couldn’t catch a ride with someone else from South Central. I guess she wanted to roll solo this morning, too. But it’s odd for Misty to ride alone, unlike myself. I actually prefer the solitude I find on the bus; it
gives me time to think. Mama says I should use this time to study my lessons, and I do for the most part. But, instead of reading or writing them down, I recite what I already know in my head. It’s hard enough to concentrate on these noisy and bumpy rides as it is. Besides, I don’t like to have too much in my hands just in case I got to make a quick move. You never know when the driver will pass up a stop or a fight will break out. I’m always on my toes.
When I finally arrive on campus, Chance is waiting for me by my locker with Nellie and Mickey, of course. I must admit, I love having my crew back together. This weekend’s chill session was just what we needed to get our groove back. And, spending time with Rah is always cool, especially when we’re in the studio. His new song still has me blushing, but not blind to the painful facts. Rah has a girl and I am single. I’ve had three relationships in four months and it’s time for me to chill. I’m letting time take over for now, leaving the controls on cruise while I sit back and enjoy the ride.
“Hey y’all,” I say, interrupting what looks like a deep conversation. “What’s up?”
“Hey Jayd,” Nellie says, putting her lean arm around my shoulders and escorting me to my locker. What’s her problem? “How are you feeling, girl,” she says as I open my locker door, retrieving my Spanish and English books for my first two periods. I haven’t forgotten them in my locker for the past couple of weeks and I have to admit, I’m proud of my progress.
“I’m feeling fine, Nellie. Are you okay?” I say, putting my hand on her forehead, checking for a fever.
“Girl, stop playing,” she says, slapping my hand away from her face and taking a step back towards Chance and Mickey, who are amused at our behavior. They look just as concerned as she does.