by Jamie Magee
“No, you won’t.”
“Yes, I will.”
She looked me dead in the eye. “No, you won’t because you’ll be dead, everyone will be. I’m going,” she said as she pulled the gear to reverse.
Britain pulled around us, then peeled out of the parking lot.
“Did he tell you how you died before?” I asked after a few minutes.
“He confirmed that there was only one way to fall.”
“Did you fall for him?”
“No,” she said quietly.
“He told you that?”
“No, he wouldn’t tell me anything.”
“Clever,” I mumbled. Britain was playing with her. If she fell for him, she would have known it long before today. She would have felt the pull I feel to Draven; it’s an undeniable emotion, one that I’ve always felt, even when I was blind.
As I got closer to Draven’s, my heart began to race, and dread and fear were all I could feel. Madison stared at me the entire way, taking in all that Silas had said to me. I didn’t want to talk about what Monroe was...it scared me too much.
I pulled around the back of the house and put the car in park.
“You do realize Willow’s family is terrified of her?” Madison said quietly.
At that moment, thunder rumbled above us; somebody was obviously making Willow mad. I looked down as I felt the weight of the world fall on my shoulders. I only had one second to decide if I was going to do this or not, and doubt was beginning to win.
Chapter Eleven
When I was in that room with Willow, I was so focused on protecting Monroe and Madison that I didn’t see nearly deep enough. I was sure that Draven had, though; even though he feared her power, I knew he wouldn't let me go if he thought that Willow would hurt any of us. I took what I did see and focused on the people around her. Willow spent almost every moment with Landen, but their family was always there. Madison was exaggerating. There was a fear of her, but it wasn’t because she was dangerous; it was because she was changing so fast, because she was forgetting what she already knew and not taking the time to balance all the new insights that came to her.
In Willow’s defense, she was distracted by this love triangle between Landen and Drake. Out of the three of them, from what I could see she was the only one that had the issue. Landen wasn’t overly threatened by Drake, and Drake was content to fight at her side. Don't get me wrong, there was jealousy, but not as much as Willow feared there was. Somebody needed to set this girl straight, and without a doubt, Madison could do just that.
“They aren’t afraid of her; they’re afraid for her,” I said to Madison. “When we get Landen back, she’ll be calm.”
“What about before then?”
I moved my head side to side in slight dismay. I really felt for Willow. She was a lot like Madison in the way she handled herself. She came across brash, but inside she was clearly tender. I had a feeling that Landen was her barrier, the one that understood her, protected her. With him gone she was vulnerable. Not because she was weak. But because she didn’t know how to explain herself. And her family didn’t know how to understand her. “I don’t plan on dragging this out forever. Besides, Monroe is the issue. I think we should go with them to wherever they left Landen’s body, use his perspective, bring him back, and hope to God that him or someone there will be able to help us with Monroe.”
“Are you not worried about Draven anymore?”
“I’m extremely worried, but he’s fighting, Madison. If anything, all of this will give him something else to focus on. It’ll help him see that he isn’t a curse to us, that he’s valuable. Needed.”
“How did Willow get that powerful?” Madison asked as a rush of wind rocked my car.
I hesitated for a second as I shifted through what I saw. “I think it was always there, but all of this stuff she’s been going through caused the power to surface...but,” I said as I squinted my eyes and tried to push my mind further into Willow’s thoughts, “she’s forgotten.”
“Forgotten what?”
“You know how we see shadows come to life?” Madison nodded. “Well, people, like images, used to appear in front of her; instead of saying words to them like we do, though, she touched them and changed their emotion, and instead of writing a song, she sketched.”
“She’s an artist? Are you freaking kidding me?!” Madison exclaimed in a desperate tone.
“Seems you guys have a lot in common,” I muttered, angling my eyes at her.
“I’m not her. I wouldn't forget how to do what we do today.”
Who was she trying to convince me or her?
“I wonder why they stopped, why she forgot?” I asked aloud. The people Willow helped before she met Landen weren’t dead; they were alive and well, and from what I could see it looked like they were in some kind of emotional pain. She was able to feel that, move to where they were and change that emotion. It was like she was their guardian angel or something. None of this made any sense.
“Because she’s running in circles, blinded by love,” Madison said shortly, clearly trying to prove her point that falling in love was a foolish thing to do.
I ignored her as I tried to understand where all of this was going. It didn’t make sense that out of all the people I saw around Willow, none of them recognized that the girl was vanishing, that she was losing just as much power as she was gaining. “Maybe. When this is over, maybe we can talk to her about what she forgot, about what The Realm is. For all we know, she could end it for us.”
“I don’t need anyone to do my dirty work for me.”
“Madison, stop this. Don’t be jealous of her.”
“Why do you think I am?” she asked coldly.
I was getting sick of not talking about the elephant in the room. Madison knew there were two guys in The Realm and that Willow obviously cared about both of them. If this were any other situation, she would already know their zodiac signs, how old they were, and what their hobbies are. That was the kind of person she was; she had to know every detail – but, not one single question about Drake, not even his name.
“You know I don’t have the words, and you’ve already told me not to talk about any dreams.” She tensed, and I raised my hand to tell her to calm down. “But I want you to know you have no reason at all to envy her, to fear her. She is just like us, and she’s forgotten that...she’s been looking for you.”
“Why?” Madison whispered as she swallowed nervously.
“I don’t know; maybe because you look just like her...maybe she thinks someone has mistaken her for you.”
Madison slowly turned her head from side to side as if I were the one that was blind to all of this. “What we look like isn’t who we are. From what you’ve said to me, from what I did see, when I looked at Brady I know that girl is running in circles. Whatever wise woman you met a thousand or so years ago is gone. Willow isn’t going to fight darkness, at least not until she gets her head clear.”
“Well, you’re good at helping people with that.”
“It’s a full-time job keeping you focused. I don’t have room for another girl to keep straight.”
I nodded once, giving up on asking her to take her defenses down; it was going to take a lot for her to trust any of these people.
“When we get to wherever we’re going, we need to ask for August,” Madison said, gathering her bag and phone.
“Why? Who is he?”
“Brady and Landen’s grandfather. I saw him calm down Brady, heard his words in his thoughts. I think he could help us with Monroe. Was that not what Silas said to do -- get her to Chara? We don’t know how long finding them is going to take.”
“Did you happen to see a great witch?” I asked; half-joking, somewhat relieved that I had her at my side backing me up, keeping me focused.
“Not sure. Too many people to take in at once when staring at your twin image.”
True, very true. “OK, so we have a plan,” I said, reaching for the door. “Thank
s,” I said quietly to Madison.
“For?”
“For not being too scared to face your fate.”
She looked over me once, then climbed out. I stuffed my phone in my pocket and grabbed my bag. When I opened the back door, I found Nana and Willow all alone in the kitchen. Willow was wearing some of the clothes that I’d packed, and she didn’t look weak or tired anymore. She looked like a normal girl, but I could still feel the power coming off her. She must have heard us walking in because she was standing, staring at the door.
“Looks like Nana took care of you,” I said, trying to break the ice.
Willow looked over what she was wearing. “Yeah...thanks for letting me borrow these.”
I tried to smile, but I was too nervous. “Are we ready?”
Willow observed Madison. I could see the frustration in both of their eyes. They hated being blind to each other, but I knew that was best, that some greater power knew that the last thing these two needed was a gateway inside of the other’s thoughts.
“Are we, Madison?” Willow asked.
“Not at all, but that’s beside the point. We have a demon to kill,” Madison answered with little enthusiasm.
Willow carefully looked over Madison like she was trying to tell herself she was real. She glanced at Madison’s tattoo, then looked at me. “I want to apologize for anything irrational I may do. Sometimes my emotions outweigh my thoughts, and right now for some unknown, complicated reason my emotions are reflected around me. I don’t mean any harm.”
As she spoke, I asked how dangerous this weather connection she had was. I saw that palace place ripped apart. I saw Brady tell her she was killing people. I also remembered Madison’s nightmare, the weather she said that was there, the lightning, wind, and thunder. I glanced at Madison; she was looking right at me. She reached for her wrist and silently tried to reassure me that the tattoo would save us.
“The place we’re going might seem frightening at first. It’s a palace, very old, very elegant. There’s a lot of energy there, and I hate to say that none of it is good. My family is there. We all have a common goal to redeem those people one way or another. I beg you to just endure it long enough for me to figure out how to get in The Realm, and once I do, I’ll bring you home or anywhere else you want to go. I promise.”
“I’ve seen it. We’ll be fine,” I said as Madison gave me a dirty look. She knew that I was terrified of that Esterious place -- not because of the dark energy, but because I knew Drake’s body was there, because I knew that it wouldn’t matter how many times I’d tried to tell Madison about him; when she was forced to face it, I would take the heat of it. I wasn’t upset about that, though; I was upset that she was about realize that she couldn’t avoid her fate by simply not thinking about it.
“OK, let’s go,” Willow said, nodding to Nana, then walking toward the entry hall.
I locked eyes with Nana. I knew if this was a bad idea she would stop me. She didn’t.
“Any advice?” I asked hoarsely.
Nana’s eyes moved to Madison. “You have a hard road in front of you.”
“I can handle it,” Madison said, dropping her eyes.
“Listen to me,” Nana said, commanding her to look her in the eye again. “That girl needs you, and you need her.”
“I don’t need her,” Madison argued.
“Yes, you do. She loves blindly, and you avoid it. You need to teach her to see what she’s really fighting, to remember who she was a few months ago, and she can teach you to trust fate.”
“She doesn’t look like she’s trusting fate to me,” Madison said, holding on to her sarcasm as a defense.
“She trusts that she’ll always be with the one she loves, no matter what,” Nana countered.
“Sounds suicidal to me,” Madison said, only to get a dirty look from Nana and an elbow from me. “Fine,” she said, throwing her hands in the air. “I’m sorry, but seriously, I’m a little uneasy that a girl that looks just like me is fighting some kind of darkness - obviously poorly. I have enough enemies without worrying about hers.”
“You’re all in this together now,” Nana said, reaching for her arm. She then looked at me and said, “You’re fighting for the dead, and they’re fighting for the living. You take every opportunity you have to learn from them, and you take every opportunity you have to teach them. If you don’t plan on doing that, then don’t leave here, don’t play into a web of darkness.”
“I’ll teach them what I know,” I said quietly. “I have to go, I have to get Monroe to a safe place.”
“That’s my girl,” Nana said, reaching to hug both me and Madison. I kept my head down and avoided her eyes as Madison and I made our way to the stairs.
When we got to the studio, Willow was holding Evan’s arm and staring into his eyes. I didn’t know what she was doing, but she seemed to be calming him down. I walked to Draven’s side. I wanted him to know what Silas had said about Monroe, how upset and scared Madison was, but I cut the vision short; I didn’t want him to see Silas kiss my forehead or him tell me that I would love him again once this was all over. I didn’t want to give Draven any excuse to be angry right now. His eyes grew sad as he looked behind him at Monroe, who was sitting with Grayson and Winston on the couch.
I knew he wanted to ask me what happened after what I showed him, but he didn’t; instead, he leaned closer to me. “Where’s your phone?” he whispered. I looked at him curiously and pulled it out of my pocket. “Headphones?” he asked. I shrugged my shoulders, knowing I had no idea where they were. He reached in the bag that was at his feet, next to his guitar case, and pulled a set out, then plugged them into my phone and moved the track to one of his songs. He looked up at me. “It’s going to be loud, and they’re going to come right at you. Are you ready for that?” he asked as his eyes met mine. I saw fear there; not for that place, but for me.
I nodded and took my phone and put it in my pocket. I looked away, knowing that if I kept his stare, I’d lose my nerve. I would stay here, where I knew what my demons looked like.
I heard Brady say, “Alright then, let’s go,” then l looked up and saw the room divide and a light reach out for us. My heart started to race, and I felt sick to my stomach. Willow reached back and grabbed my hand, and the instant she touched me all the fear vanished; it was like Silas was standing next to me. I felt calm, balanced, sure of myself. It was easy for me to follow her into the glowing light of the string, into the unknown.
The string felt different than it did when Austin had taken us in there. It still hummed, but the flow of energy wasn’t as aggressive; it was almost still, which I thought was terrifying. I knew it would take something powerful to alter energy this pure.
Willow didn’t let my arm go at first; she was purposely keeping me in the back with her. I wasn’t sure I was ready for a private conversation with her. I was a horrible liar, and if she asked me anything about a past life or what I could see, I would have to tell her - and I doubted she really wanted to hear what I had to say.
That Olivia girl was walking next to Madison, talking to her quietly. I could only hope that Madison would keep a lid on the sarcasm she typically used as a defense. Draven glanced back at me, noticing that I was side by side with Willow. He smiled faintly, then nudged Grayson. As I saw his eyes expand, I had no doubt they were talking about Monroe, at least sharing information.
“So,” Willow said, “I met Draven’s mom.”
I think my heart stopped beating for a second. In my mind she was some kind of mother figure, older friend in a past life, but then I realized she was talking about Autumn; she must have seen her ghost, and she didn’t seem shocked by that, which gave me hope that she wouldn’t be surprised about everything else I knew when she figured it out.
“How did that go?” I managed to say as I pushed the conversation I had about Egypt out of my mind.
“Well...seems you’re the leader of this group, the one who saw reason in the madness that surrounded you.�
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“I don’t know if I’d say that,” I said quietly as my eyes found Draven again. He seemed upset. I wondered what Grayson had showed him. I wondered how scared I needed to be for Monroe.
Willow must have felt my emotion because she put her hand on my back, and I felt that calm emotion again. “Listen, you and I have a lot in common.” I looked at her like she was crazy; Madison was the one that had everything in common with her. She didn’t seem to notice my odd expression, and she went on to say, “I’m not really clear on what you’re fighting outside of this darkness or how closely that dilemma weaves though this one, but I will tell you this,” she nodded toward Draven, “that boy loves you, and if I had to guess, I’d say that he thinks he’s too dangerous for you.”
My heart started to race. How did she know that? Could she feel the guilt I had about a past with Silas? Could she really feel every emotion I was clearly ignoring?
I felt the calm she was giving me intensify. I knew then that she knew now. The reaction in my emotions had just given it away.
She smiled wearily and said, “You know when this began, my hell, I had a fight with Landen. He thought that by us being together, others were suffering; that if we loved each other, that would be a selfish choice. He was willing to put others before us.”
My eyes grew wide with surprise. I knew I hadn’t focused much on Landen in that past life, but I knew there was no way those two souls wouldn’t be together; they loved each other too much.
“That idea didn’t last long, and later we learned that together we were stronger. That somewhere before this life we made choices that led us here. I’m the one that creates any and all turmoil between us. I do that because I hide things from him, things he can feel. We ignored the obvious...if I had any advice for you, I would tell you not to hide. Face it, especially if Draven can see the way all of you say he can. It will be painful. I can’t say that it won’t be, but that sharp, instant, fading pain is better than dwelling in the numbing pain of denial day after day.”