by Cat Mann
****
Ari was set to go back to work after the weekend and I was dreading his absence. I kept reminding myself that real life involved things like work and school and I needed to get a better grip on reality. It was hard with all of the fears that had been plaguing me. It was already the end of October and I was beginning to think I would not be able to start school at the spring semester and the realization made me feel worse.
We went over to dinner at Aggie and Andy’s on Saturday night rather than Sunday, because the Alexanders were to throw a small party afterwards for Halloween. I was sick of parties and crowds and all I wanted to do was stay at home, but that would mean I would have to be home by myself and I was too scared to be alone.
I walked into the kitchen with Ari; he hugged his mom hello and left to talk with his dad - alone.
I hadn’t seen Aggie since we got back from our trip to Greece. I took the book that she had lent me and set it on the table in front of her.
“Thanks,” I said and started to turn to go to the living room.
“Sure, Ava,” she said with a smile. “You can pick it up over here next time, though.”
I looked at her, having no idea what she was going on about, and she gave me a little wink. Then I remembered what had happened the week before, when she had come to our house to deliver the book.
“Serves you right, Aggie; you wanted details and now you have them.” My tone was harsher than I intended.
“Okay, you win. I’ll never ask again! Believe me, I don’t want to know,” she said, smiling playfully. I could not bring a return smile to my lips. I just nodded and walked away. I couldn’t find the playful, carefree side of my personality. I didn’t feel like smiling or laughing. Aggie watched me leave the kitchen with concern in her eyes.
I sat at the piano and played until my fingers ached too much to carry on. At dinner, I stayed quiet until Lauren said how excited she was that August was going to be teaching two of her classes. I nearly choked on my food.
“Don’t take this the wrong way, August, but you, Lauren,” I said turning to look at my sister-in-law, “you are going to hate him!”
August nodded his head up and down vigorously, agreeing with me.
“What? Why?” Lauren frowned with disappointment.
“August was my private teacher for Wheatin Prep and he was a harsh taskmaster jerk. His exams were brutal and his lectures went on for hours. The closer we got to becoming friends the harder he pushed me, so don’t think he will go easy on you because you know each other. Oh, and if you speak or write one lick of English in your French class, be prepared for a ton of homework and public humiliation.”
“Don’t act like my rules and tests were a bad thing, Ava. If not for me you never would have graduated at the top of your class at one of the highest-ranking schools in London.”
“I would have settled for just graduating at that point, August, but thanks. Truthfully, Lauren, August is a great teacher; just don’t let his looks fool you. He will not be fun…ever.”
“Uh, we did too have fun!” August said with a pout.
“Yeah, we had fun, after class, like three times.”
“It’s not my fault you were so hung up on Ari that you couldn’t enjoy London,” he retorted.
Ari put his arm around my shoulder and kissed my hair.
Lauren looked angry, pushed her food around on her plate for the rest of dinner, and did not say anything else. I didn’t either for that matter; my mind was somewhere else entirely. I could not forget about No. 7 and I couldn’t put my uneasy feelings to rest. I was beginning to feel paranoia lurking behind all my thoughts. I had bitten and peeled my fingernails down to near non-existence. I fidgeted constantly with whatever was at hand. My leg shook and bounced around at dinner so much that Ari had to keep putting his hand on my knee to stop the table from rattling.