What did this have to do with her problems? Not that it mattered. Anything to stop thinking about her misery. "Shoot."
"Well," her mom grabbed a chair from the kitchen and sat down. "Your dad was about to graduate from high school. He was dating this really beautiful girl who was also a senior."
Huh. Hadn't heard this version before.
"I'd always had a crush on him. We were partners in biology, and I'd fallen in love with him. We were perfect for each other, except that he was dating this other girl."
Josie grinned. "Go on."
"Well, my best friend's sister's boyfriend's cousin saw your dad in Wal-Mart looking at engagement rings for this girl. He was going to marry her! Can you imagine?"
"Unconscionable," Josie said, her sisters and sisters-in-law adding their sentiments.
"So, I knew if he married her, it would be a terrible mistake for him. He'd wind up divorced and miss out on the opportunity to marry his one true love."
"That being you?"
"Of course." Her mom grinned. "So I enlisted the help of a few friends, did a little sleuthing, got your dad to see the girl in what looked like a compromising situation with another boy, then I comforted him, and the rest, as they say, is history. We were engaged by graduation, married by Labor Day, and I was pregnant by Christmas. And it's been perfect for thirty-nine years."
Josie was shocked. Her puritan mother, involved in a scam. "So this girl did nothing wrong?"
"She was about to marry my man. That's wrong in my book." Her sisters asked more questions, but her mom shook them off and looked at Josie. "So, my dear, do you see my point?"
Her point? "Um...I don't think so."
Her mom sighed. "My point is that if you love a man, you have to take control of the situation. They don't always realize who they love or what's best for them."
"But if you force them into something, then you'll both end up miserable," Josie pointed out.
"Very true. However, you can't force them into anything they really don't want. Sometimes they need a few good kicks in the bottom before they realize the truth."
"So, you think I should set Buddy up in a compromising situation so Evan realizes Buddy doesn't love me?"
"Not exactly. I just meant you need to take control of the situation and help Evan realize what he really wants."
"No." Josie folded her arms across her chest.
"I agree with Josie. If Evan won't come to her of his own accord, he doesn't deserve her," Monica announced.
Gotta love true friends.
"Interesting that the only two women in the room who feel that way are the only two who aren't married. All the ones with successful relationships agree you need to fight this one out."
Josie lifted her chin. "We're single because we want to be."
"Yes, but that doesn't mean you know what you're doing," Rose said. "Fight for it, Josie."
"No." Fighting for Evan would be an acknowledgement that she wanted him, which would make it particularly painful when he removed her heart from her chest and laid it out on the track for the running of the Kentucky Derby.
"It's not right to walk away from the man you love just because it gets difficult," her sister-in-law Laurie said. "Sometimes love is tough."
"That's where the phrase tough love comes from," her sister, Marie, said. "Can you imagine if I'd left when Robbie lost his job? Horrible. Why just the other day..."
Josie elbowed Monica and they silently agreed to leave the married women to their tough love discussion, sneaking out the door unnoticed.
As soon as they got outside, Josie screamed. Just once, in a very dignified manner. Ah. Much better.
"Do you think Evan cares about you?" Monica sat down on the curb, near a bunch of eight-year-olds learning how to skateboard in the middle of the street.
Josie joined her friend. "I don't know."
"You care about him?"
"In some ways." She would deny the "love" thing for as long as possible.
Monica rubbed her jaw. "If he did love you, it would be too bad not to give it a chance."
"Nope. Not going to do it." She hugged her knees to her chest and rested her chin on them. Why couldn't she be eight again and have her biggest challenge be not cracking her head open on the pavement?
"What if you took an altruistic approach?"
Josie eyed her friend. "What do you mean?"
"Well, like be a good Samaritan."
"For the man who stole ninety grand from me and the brother who accuses me of being a liar and uses my body in very nice ways." Mmm...very nice indeed.
"Exactly. If you reconcile them, it can be your gift to them."
"Why would I want to give them any gifts? Isn't the fact they've both been lucky enough to know me more than they deserve?"
"But of course. Unless Evan is the man you're supposed to marry. Then doesn't he deserve more?"
Josie wrinkled her nose. "I'm not feeling indulgent toward him."
"I thought you were an Amazon."
"No. An Amazon wanna-be. There's a difference."
"So, here's your chance. Be a warrior. Take control of the situation. Reconcile Buddy and Evan. Then that goes out of the picture for you and Evan, and you guys can go forward without that baggage."
For a moment, a flicker of excitement flashed in her. Then she frowned. "But I'd have to kill my family too. I don't think he's worth that."
"Why in the world would you have to do that?"
"Because, I think Evan might like me for my family instead of for myself."
"Oh, for heaven's sake." Monica stood up in disgust. "If you're going to be that full of pity and self-esteem issues, you're beyond help. Give me a break! When you're ready to drag yourself out of that pit of despair you're in, you give me a call."
Monica then placed her foot on Josie's bum and shoved her off the curb into the street.
"Hey!"
"Consider yourself kicked in the butt. I'm outta here."
And then Monica left.
For the first time in fifteen years, Monica had walked out on her.
Wow.
She must be really pathetic.
Okay, Josie, think. If she packed her bags and left the Dorsett brothers unresolved, could she forget about them and go on?
No.
Evan loved his brother. How could she hate him for that? Well, it actually wasn't that hard, but that was just because she was being a selfish pig.
So...what if she did resolve to get them together? Not because she wanted Evan (yeah, right—who was she trying to fool?), but because she needed to get something right with a man.
Hmm...could she buy that?
She would reconcile Evan and Buddy for their own good. For her own power. To show she was powerful and didn't have to be a whiny, pathetic fool around men. Not in the hopes that Evan would fall in love with her.
"Josie?" Her mom sat down beside her. "You okay?"
"Fine."
"What are you going to do?"
"Nothing." She cringed as an eight-year-old crashed, and then hopped up with a grin. That's how she was supposed to be. Crashing to the pavement, then rebounding without a scratch. Why did it get so hard to do that the older she got?
"You got burned by Tom and Buddy."
"Really? Hadn't noticed." If she went skateboarding without a helmet, maybe she'd get a concussion and could hang out in a coma for a few months while the world worked itself out around her. That was an idea.
"Don't be so afraid of it happening again that you don't try."
"I think I'll take up skateboarding."
"If you walk away now, you'll always wonder whether Evan was the one, whether it would have worked out if you'd tried. If you hadn't been afraid."
"Fear is for wimps. Maybe I'll start skydiving." Without a helmet, of course. Gotta find a way to get that concussion.
"If you try and fail, then at least you'll know and be able to move on."
Yeah, right. She'd be comparing every man t
o Evan for the rest of her life. "Why didn't you tell me to fight for Tom?"
"Because he wasn't good enough for you."
"He was filthy rich."
"Oh, come on, Josie. Do you really think money makes a man good?"
Well, no...
"He never loved you, and started shtupping his colleague while he was still married to you. You deserve better. It would have been a waste of time to fight for him."
Still, she felt like she should have done something. She'd let him get out of the marriage without a whimper. "Did I tell you I'm going to learn sword fighting?"
"Even if you become an expert sword fighter, it won't change the fact that you gave up on Evan without trying."
She hated when her mom was right.
"If you love him, admit it and do something about it. This isn't about Evan loving another woman, or even not loving you. It's about his dedication to his family, which is admirable and not necessarily in conflict with his loving you."
What planet had her mom been on? "I beg to differ."
"No. Don't ever beg. Be proud. Take control. And leave with dignity if you have to."
Josie glanced at her mom. That sounded suspiciously like a description of a warrior woman.
Her mom grinned. "Go for it, Josie. You might be surprised."
"I guess I could try to reconcile them."
"Yep."
"And then see what happens?"
"Sure."
Josie peered at her mom. "I need one favor, though."
"What's that?"
"You have to make the family blackball him."
Her mom didn't even act surprised at the request. "Your brothers figured out he was...ahem...pleasuring himself with you without a ring. I don't think you'll have to worry about that."
Pleasuring himself?
Okay. She was officially completely mortified. She'd never be able to look her mom in the eye again. She didn't need to be eight years old again. At twenty-seven, she still found her mom just as embarrassing. Time to go. Now.
Chapter 29
Josie waited until Evan left for work in the morning before setting up her command center.
Flip charts.
Markers.
Reference books on self-empowerment and goal setting.
Iced tea for hydration.
Poster of a badass female superhero for inspiration.
Perfectly cooked waffles for nutrition, loaded with whipped cream and strawberries for a true Belgian waffle concoction.
Monica for consultation.
Zeus and Max for stress relief.
Ready to go.
"So, the plan." Josie picked up a red marker. "Admit failure."
Monica took a bite of waffle. "Which failure?"
"Failure to attain my goal of not getting involved with a needy man." Josie wrote, "Failure is empowering" on the board. "Not that Evan is my typical needy man, but he needs me, so what can I say? I'm involved."
Monica nodded. "I'm with you. Next."
"Goals." Josie took a green pen and wrote the heading on a new page. "I need to make these selfless."
"Help Buddy and Evan reconcile."
"Right. That's totally selfless. I'm such a do-gooder." Josie scrawled it across the page. "Number two: Help Evan get over his guilt."
"You're such a sweetheart."
"Aren't I? No wonder Buddy loves me." Josie turned back to the board. "Number three: convince Buddy he doesn't love me so he will be free to meet the right woman for him."
"Again, you are the most selfless person I know."
"I tell you, I'm a shoo-in for the golden gates." Josie tapped the back of the pen against her hand. "Number four: allow Evan the freedom to pursue what or who will make him happy. Too transparent?"
"Not at all. You aren't saying that he should choose you. You're just wanting him to be able to be happy, and if it happens to be you...well, isn't that a handy piece of luck?"
Josie grinned. "I knew you were my best friend for a reason."
"What about a Josie goal? Even though failure is empowering, you should do something for yourself."
"Hmm...excellent point. I am trying to be more selfish." Josie studied the board. "How about to make Alice suffer for a while before coming back to work?"
"Might jeopardize the golden gate status."
"Maybe. How about I get loans? Now that I'm employed again I might qualify. Then it'll be clear that I'm not trying to get Evan just so he can support me. Not that I'm trying to get Evan, because I'm not. I'm just being selfless, and it needs to be clear how selfless I'm being."
"Sounds like a wrap to me."
Josie scrawled it down. "Okay, short recap. Alienate Buddy. Reconcile the boys. Free Evan to chase his dream and get me into school. I like it."
"Now what?"
"Figure out a plan." Josie grinned. "This is where we get to be creative." She picked up a book titled, How to Get a Raise and a Promotion Even If You Haven't Shown Up to Work in Sixty Days. "What do you think? I picked it up this morning. I think it's got potential, huh?"
"Does it advocate blood shedding and blackmail?"
Josie pursed her lips. "Maybe a little."
Monica sat up. "Sounds cool. Let's get on it."
That evening at precisely fourteen minutes past eight o'clock, Josie sidled casually into the kitchen where Evan was peering in the fridge for an evening snack. "So... Evan..."
He immediately stood up. "What?"
"Why do you look so suspicious?"
"Because you're never so casual and deliberate. What do you want?"
Hmm...he seemed a little tense. "Did you have a visit from my brothers today?"
He immediately scowled. "Did you put them up to it? Because it wasn't funny. I was in the middle of an important meeting and..."
"Hey! I had nothing to do with it. They decided you'd been getting your jollies with me and they went out after you. I told them nothing and I tried to stop them, so back off!" Yes, she was an Amazon. "Did I tell you that I start sword fighting classes tomorrow? I signed up for an intensive session. Three nights a week for six weeks. That way I'll be finished before school starts." Assuming she was able to start school. That finance thing was still a wee bitty concern.
"Great. So I should lie awake at night in case you decide to skewer me in my sleep? Can't wait." He slammed the fridge shut. "Why are you and your whole family after me? I admit it. I made a mistake. I shouldn't have made love to you once, let alone twice."
She decided to not point out it had been a few more times than twice, though it had been two separate nights. He seemed a little testy. "So what exactly did my brothers do to you?"
"And your brothers-in-law. Can't forget them." He stalked across the kitchen and yanked open a cabinet.
Brothers-in-law? "How many of them showed up?"
"Eight. That's the whole lot of them, isn't it?" He grabbed a bag of pretzels, muttering something that even a sailor might find offensive.
"So, what'd they do?"
He scowled at her. "You don't know?"
"Would I ask if I knew?" Would she ask if she had a brain in her head? Completely foolish to get involved in a game between the boys.
"Probably. Just to make me relive it." He shoved another pretzel in his mouth, made a face, then tossed them in the trash. Max promptly dove in after the bag, grabbed it, and disappeared around the corner.
"Yeah, I noticed they were stale yesterday." Should she be calling Max? Nah, it was neither her house nor her pretzels.
"And you put them back in the cabinet?"
And her mom thought her calling in life was to be a devoted housewife. Yeah, right. There'd be mold all over everything. "I'm a terrible housekeeper."
"Apparently." He yanked open the cabinet again, this time pulling down a bag of cookies. "So, I was sitting there in a meeting with a new client and I hear this ruckus outside. Your brothers were attacking my secretary."
"Don't believe you. They'd never attack a woman." He glared at h
er, and she suddenly grinned. "They bribed her, didn't they? She stood aside and let them in."
"Maybe." He shoved another cookie in his mouth. "You'd think there'd be some loyalty after all this time, you know? But no, she just grabs the vat of chocolate and disappears into the break room. Can you believe it?"
"Yes." Her brothers could be incredibly persuasive when they wanted to. "So? What'd they do?"
He looked at her. "Walked into the conference room, announced I was disgracing their sister, dragged me out of there, tied me up in my office, and took turns extolling your desirable qualities for two hours."
She was about to feel bad for him, but then she saw a glint of humor in his eyes. "You let them kidnap you, didn't you?"
"Maybe."
"And they didn't lecture you for two hours, did they?"
"Sure did. Funniest damn thing I ever saw."
"Funny? What was funny?"
"Eight grown men trying to tell a guy not to shtup their sister without ever actually wanting to picture their sister shtupping anyone. Never heard so many euphemisms. They were so embarrassed by the whole thing they couldn't even remember to throw me out the window." He sobered. "They love you, though. That was clear."
So that's why he was happy. Because he'd spent the afternoon surrounded by brotherly love, even at the expense of his physical freedom.
"When I explained the Buddy situation, they understood."
"What?" How could her brothers go to the other side? Not that she'd wanted them to go beat up Evan, but come on! She was the one who'd been wronged.
"And there's that whole code about not messing with your friend/brother's woman."
"But you already did that."
He took another bite of cookie. "I made sure not to confirm that fact for them. No need to complicate things."
"So you lied so my brothers would like you." And she'd been worried that Evan liked her for her family. Obviously, she'd been so wrong. Not.
"I omitted certain facts to avoid bloodshed." He tossed the cookies on the counter. "Anyway, it's over."
"What's over?"
He rested his hands on the counter on either side of his hips. "Us."
"Just like that? So casual, like I'm a rat that's been living in the walls of your house?" Jerk. Jerk. Jerk.
Paws Up for Love Page 22