She tried not to imagine what kind of response Marc’s frank words would create on their social network sites, but then again, it would be mild compared to what they had in front of them. Hilary smiled wryly to herself.
Bring it.
She was certain they were well equipped for the storm in the making.
Chapter Six
Lee was growing more silent by the minute as she leafed through the material Vivien had given her.
Vivien could relate. She too, had at some point believed that it was easy to separate the rational from the delusional, right from wrong, and in a way, she still did. She had given up all hope that deep down inside, all people had a common goal and wanted to play fair. The material used to shame women, the pictures, the rhetoric and the lies…It wasn’t easy to deal with once you got up close.
“This is insane,” Lee said. “Don’t they know any of the facts? Can’t we talk about reality to them?”
“To some, maybe, but I’m not so sure about those guys who say you can’t get pregnant from rape—or the mother’s life is never in danger, because we got science.” Vivien shook her head. “You’d wish they wouldn’t hate science so much.”
“How can you stand to be in this job?”
“What do you mean?”
Lee closed the folder soundly.
“You know my parents worked their asses off so my brother and I could go to college. In return, we do the same, so their investment pays off, so to speak. What I don’t get is…there are people who can just make stuff up and get away with it. How is that possible? I’m not talking free speech. People who have hallucinations have the right to free speech too, but we recognize when it’s the voices in their heads.”
Vivien understood well about the reality check Lee was getting at the moment. She’d been someone writing off prejudice and hate to those how simply didn’t know better and would come around the moment they learned the truth. She had come to adopt a concept of manipulators—usually in it for the money or some other rewards—and the ones how let themselves be manipulated—motivated by, however irrational, fear and anger.
At the moment, she didn’t care for detailing her own journey to Lee who, in spite of her bewilderment, still gave Vivien appreciative glances, and had brought expensive coffee first thing in the morning again. For the fourth time—Wednesday had been her day off.
Vivien felt like the pressure she was under grew constantly, and one part of that was clearly irrational, another, maybe, fear-motivated. She should be happy about Kerry’s new career opportunity, because she’d be good at it, and it was the kind of work they both believed mattered. The label of a hate crime meant to understand and explain people’s actions within a certain context often overlooked. You needed the bigger picture to even start to understand the change that was necessary. The salary was a good selling point as well.
Fifteen minutes away from town where the FPC was located, Vivien asked herself if there were really no other options, if they could do important work in another state, find another home and doctor without feeling like they were letting the people at home down. Maybe they should go to Hawaii, where Kerry and Hilary’s utopia had originally been located. Anything other than her current destination sounded more promising.
She was tired, of the inevitable encounters they’d make today, of those creating a stigma around something that was none of their business. It would be worse as long as Miller’s slashing of safe zones was still standing.
“Remember what Dana said. Don’t let anyone provoke you. Our focus is on the women.”
“Sure. You said your girlfriend was looking into that bar regulations? Would there be anywhere we could go tonight without having to pee on a stick? Or maybe you’d like to come to my apartment this time.”
Vivien barely suppressed a smile.
“Kerry says the manager was in the right, but it’s something the people who run the place decide. Which isn’t great either, but it won’t be all over town. I don’t have time tonight though. When we’re done here, I just want to get home.”
“Sure, no problem. Another time, maybe?”
“Okay.”
“What are you doing on the weekend?”
She’d have more time on her hands than she cared to, as Kerry would be working, but Lee didn’t need to know that.
“Groceries, laundry, trying to come up with some clever phrases to apply for grants, that sort of thing. We’re having dinner with friends on Saturday. Wow, I can imagine how boring that sounds to you.”
“It does not. I’m not that young.”
They drove in silence. The Family Planning Center was located in a valley, and they could see a substantial amount of people already gathered from their viewpoint, some carrying signs. Vivien felt her stomach clench. The new laws seemed to have energized the usual crowd. Usually, there weren’t so many at this time of the day. As they got closer, they could read the words on the signs, the phrases everything that was to be expected. Someone had a picture of Miller with a quote on his, displaying his stance toward the FPCs.
Lee was pale, but her stance determined.
“We’ll be fine,” Vivien said, squeezing her shoulder after she’d parked the car on one of the few remaining spots. Lee gave her a grateful smile, and they got out of the car to meet with the local activists.
What she saw next, made her heart skip a beat. As expected, the so-called pro-life groups had turned out bigger numbers than before, and were louder as well. Those quietly forming a human corridor to the front door were quite a different sight than the handful of determined FPC supporters who came here whenever possible. They had turned out in even bigger numbers. Julia waved.
“Wow,” Lee commented. “From what you told me, this wasn’t what I expected.”
“Me neither. Can you stay with Julia for a moment? I have to check in with the director for a moment. It seems to me that the folks here are pretty organized already.”
“It’s amazing.” She shared a smile with Lee, feeling slightly hopeful even with the insult a young man in his late twenties yelled at them. Miller might have been able to land a surprise win, but he wouldn’t be able to fight the tide even here in his home state.
Vivien spent a few minutes with the director only to learn that the volunteers had almost doubled since the last organized protest. They talked about the recent developments and the promise from Greene Industries to keep the center open when the noise from the crowd erupted.
“Excuse me, I’ve got to go. We’ll be available later for anyone who’d like more information.”
“Be careful out there,” the woman advised.
Vivien gave her a wry smile. “Aren’t we always?”
Lee, as it turned out, wasn’t as careful. “What is it to you?” she yelled back at the man with the sign that said, predictably, ‘baby killer.’ “This is none of your business.”
“An innocent life is everyone’s business. You are an accomplice to murder.”
“Oh, just go f—”
“Lee. Lee! Come here for a moment.”
“Don’t pretend!” the man shouted. “I know you. You’re no better than her!”
They were lucky, this time, because a patient arrived, and they flocked towards her. Vivien had heard their arguments a million times. You don’t have to do this. We can help you. Don’t murder an innocent life. They had no solace to offer to the woman who had a late term abortion because her doctor had told her the baby was already dead or would not survive outside the womb—or the woman in the first trimester who suffered from trauma or poverty or both. Empty promises—no one would feel the slightest bit responsible once a child was born. They didn’t care for the story, or that an individual woman’s decision was none of their business in the first place.
“You can’t do this, ever again,” she warned Lee, whose expression was somewhat of an angry pout. “They get under your skin, well, that’s the plan all along—and if it doesn’t end in a shouting match, you’ll find yourself i
n a court sooner than you can say, ‘he started it, and I was right’.”
“I’m sorry.”
Lee’s apology seemed genuine, so Vivien was willing to let this go.
“Let them talk,” she advised. “That’s all.”
“Do you get emails, and calls?”
Vivien didn’t need to ask for details. “Mostly at the center, but yes, it happens.”
“Have you ever been afraid?” Lee pressed further on.
“A couple of times.” Vivien straightened her shoulders. “Let’s just get this day over, okay? We have a lot more people here on our side than before. That’s a good sign. Let’s look on the bright side.”
Another patient arrived, and she and Lee joined the human fence that enabled her to a safe passage to the front door.
“We are going to sue you,” a woman cried. “You are not allowed to keep us away from the door, and we have the right to inform the women!”
Vivien suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. “Whatever you call ‘information’,” she muttered under her breath. Women who campaigned passionately against women’s choices made her sad, but she had learned to keep a rational approach, keep some detachment. It had worked for most of the time in the years she’d been working for Dana. Vivien wasn’t kidding herself. She knew she was on the verge of a burnout—unlike Kerry, for whom the Hate Crimes unit was a way to explore new career options. She’d be a good teacher too, and if she chose to follow that path, that would keep her out of the line of fire more often.
Decisions.
Her cell phone rang, and she excused herself, feeling guilty at the sight of the caller ID. Tasha was a friend of her and Kerry’s, one she’d been meaning to call for weeks. As it was, she didn’t have time for her at the moment.
“Tasha, hi. I’m at the FPC. Can we talk later tonight?”
“Please, don’t hang up,” Tasha said. Vivien realized with a start that she sounded like she was crying.
“What’s wrong?”
“Everything,” Tasha sniffed. “Oh my God, I don’t even know where to start. I was hoping you’d be at the office, that you could come by tonight. Viv…I don’t feel so good.”
“Relax. I can’t leave here right now, but Kerry could drop by before her shift, or if you can wait until later…” Her ramblings were probably not that reassuring. “Tasha. You’ve been taking your meds, right?”
Tasha had been suffering from an anxiety disorder since her early twenties, but she had found a good therapist and was doing well with the sessions and medication.
“I don’t have them,” Tasha said miserably.
“What? You ran out? Can’t you reach your therapist?”
“She’s on vacation, and her replacement can’t see me today. I didn’t run out. They don’t give them to me anymore!”
Vivien kept an eye on Lee, but the young woman learned her lesson, staying impassive even while a teenager waved gruesome images in her face. For a selfish, unhappy moment, she wished she could hang up on her friend, go home, and spend some time with Kerry before she went on her night shift. She knew what was coming, and with it, the feeling of helpless anger, pointless, but undeniable.
“It’s because I’m pregnant,” Tasha said. “They are saying that I could be charged with child endangerment, and the therapist too, so they don’t want to take the chance.”
“That is not right. You were fine with those meds when you had Bobby. I can’t…Miller is not a Goddamn scientist or a doctor—and your therapist is what, enjoying her vacation?”
“Please, it’s not her fault. It’s the law now. They could take away her license.”
“I know.”
“I don’t know if I can do this all by myself. I am so scared.”
“I understand. I’ll send Kerry over, okay? I’m sure I’ll be almost done here by the time she has to leave. We’ll figure something out. Have you talked to Ethan?” Vivien tried to keep up a low soothing tone even though she was ready to throw something. Ethan, Tasha’s husband, was stationed in the Middle East, and expected home in time for the baby’s birth—barely.
“We spoke a few days ago,” Tasha said. “I was doing all right, but it’s just getting worse by the minute. This isn’t fair! We were so happy about this baby.”
“It’s going to be okay.” It was a big promise to make, but her alternatives were limited. “I’ll call Kerry, and I’ll see you later, okay? You’ll be fine, you and the baby. Is Bobby still in daycare? Is there someone who’ll drive him home today, another mom?”
“Yes.”
“All right, good. Why don’t you make some tea? We will figure it out.”
“Thank you,” Tasha whispered.
Vivien dialed Kerry’s number right away, but got the voicemail.
“Hi, honey, it’s me. Could you please go see Tasha before your shift, or give her a call? She’s not feeling so good at the moment. I’ll see her later. Thank you. I love you, bye.”
Now that she had their friend to worry about as well, time seemed to be going even slower. They did their best to shelter patients and employees from the shaming and threats.
“There’s strength in numbers,” Julia said bravely. “At least, now we are enough so someone can go for coffee.”
“Coffee is always a plus,” Vivien agreed. So was gallows humor. All in all, she was relieved with the outcome of today’s rally so far, and she hoped that Miller’s political games would prompt more people in the state to get involved.
A couple was leaving the FPC, a man and a woman, both no older than thirty. He had his arm around her, and both looked like they wanted to disappear. The roar in the crowd got louder again.
For a moment, the man’s eyes met Vivien’s. She wished she could have answered the implied question, beyond “it’s the law, and it’s their right to call you whatever they want to”. Someday, something had to give, for people to learn, but in the meantime, all they could do is stand in between and hope for the best that no one got hurt.
“If they let us closer to the door where we are allowed now, we could have saved that child.”
“Somebody should shoot them.”
Vivien cringed at the angry shout. She had seen a few protesters who were carrying, and while it was mostly showing off, you could never be a hundred percent sure. The words prompted the man to turn around.
“You don’t know anything about my family, so shut the hell up. If you can’t see past the fact that there’s a person here who needed help, you shouldn’t be so fucking self-righteous to begin with!”
The people behind her were starting to press closer, making Vivien feel claustrophobic. Most patients, like the pro-choice activists, tended to keep as much distance as possible. They didn’t want to give the protesters any fodder for their attitude, or, God forbid, a lawsuit, but everyone reached the end of the line at some point.
“What about the person you just murdered?”
“Sir, why don’t we get you two out of here, now?” Vivien stepped forward, feeling the people behind her almost breathing down her neck.
“Why can they do this?”
“Let’s go. We just want to make sure that you both are safe, okay? That’s your car over there?”
“Yes. Thank you so much for—”
They never made it there as that moment, there was a wave in the crowd behind as they intended to open the human fence when another patient arrived. Vivien was pushed forward, and losing her footing, she slipped and fell right into a puddle, struggling to get to her feet. The couple had gotten away. She couldn’t see Lee or Julia in the resulting commotion. The pain was next, knocking her out.
* * * *
By the time Kerry arrived at their friend’s home, Tasha had calmed down a bit. Her son Bobby was playing in his room, and Tasha had made a tea for the two of them she served with a plate of cookies. She still looked pale and withdrawn, a startlingly different picture from the woman who had been so happy to share the news about her pregnancy three months ago.
/> With every bit of new evidence, Kerry felt worse. Miller showed right away he wasn’t all talk. It turned out he was more than willing to shape the state according to his ideology, people, and women in the first place, be damned. Tasha wasn’t even supposed to be on the radar—a straight married woman who was about to welcome a second child into their family. Pity, though, she was a woman, and either way, her choices would be curbed. Tasha would make it through. She had a good support system, but the point was, there was no need for her to go through this pain. What would happen to those who didn’t have anyone to support them? Well, maybe they could find hope in a little California dreaming.
Kerry would wait until Monday, but she was pretty sure what her answer to Lieutenant Fairbanks would be. Someone had to stay and fight, didn’t they?
She drove back to the department and settled behind her desk, going through the impressive record of a suspect in a recent shooting when Dana Martin called.
“I suppose you already know—it should have come over the scanner by now. This is crazy. It’s not what the police are supposed to do, there’s no reason for them to arrest our people.”
“Slow down, Ms. Martin, what happened?”
She looked up to see Captain Jepsen standing at her desk, his expression serious.
“They arrested a bunch of people today,” Martin told her. “For some reason, mostly on our side. As we’ve feared, they want to twist it into some sort of violation of their rights if we try to keep them away from the front door. Don’t worry, Vivien has legal representation from us, but—”
“Vivien?” Kerry hadn’t even realized she’d jumped to her feet. “Is she okay?”
“Pretty much,” Dana said, which was by far not enough reassurance.
“What the hell does that mean?”
“I don’t know all the details, but…things got out of control quite a bit. If you could come and get her? We should be able to get her out before midnight.”
Kerry almost repeated her question—as it was, she was speechless, her stomach churning with worry. She hadn’t expected all of these things to happen so soon, even though, if she was honest, she had always been aware of the possibility.
The Exodus Strategy Page 7