by M. E. Carter
When he smiles at me, I’m blasted with heat through my entire body. He’s so freaking attractive. Why is he talking to me? Wouldn’t he rather hit on the blonde bartender? She’s gorgeous.
“You didn’t make me uncomfortable.”
“Are you sure?”
He nods and relief runs through me. It’s not that I’m terribly worried about what other people think of me. I just don’t like doing things that put people in awkward situations.
“You were really cute. Especially when you said my name.”
His lips quirk up on the side and I’m reminded of exactly how flirty I was.
“Oh god,” I groan, a hand over my face.
“Liiiiiiiam,” he says, obviously imitating me. “It was even better when it came through by text.”
“I still can’t believe I did that.”
“Relax.” He nudges my shoulder with his gently. “It was a fun night. I needed it. It’d been a really crappy day so I appreciate that you changed my mood.”
“You’d had a crappy day, too?”
“Maybe not as crappy as yours, but yeah.”
I fidget with my straw, determined to enjoy Liam’s company while he’s still interested.
“Care to tell me about it?”
His expression changes, darkens a bit. “It’s no big deal.”
“Doesn’t look like it’s no big deal.” He doesn’t respond and for some reason, I feel the need to push him a little. “I told you all about my crappy day. It’s your turn to share. Fair is fair, ya know.”
He turns back to me, leaning his big body against the counter, his bicep straining the sleeve of his shirt. He looks at me then takes a deep breath.
“I play hockey for a living.”
I can tell by the guarded expression on his face that I reacted with surprise, even if I didn’t intend to.
“It’s not a big deal. It’s just a job like anyone else’s,” he says sheepishly, likely trying to stop any fangirl action before it starts. Not that I would do that.
“Well, not really, but I understand what you mean,” I say. “I didn’t mean to react. I’ve just never met a professional hockey player before.”
“But you’ve met other professional athletes?”
“I know Lauren’s boyfriend, Heath. He plays football still, right? Wait. That was dumb. Not all pro athletes know each other.” I shake off my embarrassment but Liam just chuckles.
“In this case, I actually do know Heath. We have the same agent.”
“Oh. Small world. Anyway, sorry. Continue with your crappy day.”
“Right. I’ve been having some pain in my shoulder and was kind of in avoidance mode the day we met. That’s why I was in a bad mood. Until we started talking, that is.”
With just those two sentences, I feel a strange sort of confidence. I helped this man, this very attractive, very successful if he’s a pro athlete, very interesting man have a better day. I’m not used to this kind of compliment. But it makes me feel good. Like maybe I’m not as forgettable as I’ve always believed.
Something sparks in me. A desire to take life by the horns and put myself out there more. If two drinks at a bar can help this incredible man feel better, what have I been missing out on by holding back on trying new things or exploring who I am?
I know it’s not just this conversation. It’s also the gaping hole Kevin left. Not with his sudden breakup speech, but the realization that trying to be someone I might not actually be wasn’t good enough for him, or his mother even. So why am I holding myself back from experiencing life? Because I’m worried about losing relationships that are only surface level anyway? Where has that gotten me?
Sitting in a bar, hoping to rekindle old friendships because I have none, finally understanding that I’ve got more life to live than I know what to do with. But I have this feeling in my gut that Liam knows how. And that he will be willing to show me.
Feeling a sudden burst of confidence, I lean in and place my hand on his thigh. I’m not sure if I’m being seductive or supportive but I’m not afraid to try and find out this time.
“How is your shoulder feeling now?”
Liam’s brow raises and he looks down at my hand. His nostrils flare for just a split second, as if he’s trying to maintain some form of control. I still don’t know if I’m being flirty or crossing some unwritten line, but he makes no move to push my hand away so I take that as a good sign.
“It uh…” he clears his throat and I feel so powerful by rendering him speechless. Is this what women mean when they say they feel empowered? “It still hurts like a bitch. Have to have surgery next week to fix it.”
I remove my hand and he shakes his head just slightly.
“I’m sorry. That must be really scary.”
“Not scary as much as frustrating. I’ll be out for at least twelve weeks which is messing with my brain, I think.”
“I get that. Nothing like thinking you’re set at your job and suddenly a wrench is thrown in it and you no longer know where you stand.”
“You do get it.”
“I work for my ex-boyfriend’s mother, remember?” I shift in myself, too embarrassed to look at him while I tell him the whole truth. “Turns out she’s the one who set him up with the girl he took out to dinner an hour after he broke up with me.”
“Oh, now that is some shit right there.”
“Yep. But it opened my eyes to a few things.”
“Really? Like what?”
“Like I wasted a lot of years trying to be something that I might not actually be, trying to fit into that world. But what if I’m not that person? What if I’m actually someone completely different and I just don’t know it because I’ve never explored any other side of me?”
“I’d say you’re doing a good job figuring it out already.” He touches my hair again and it reminds me I can take chances. There is nothing stopping me. The world is my oyster or however the saying goes, I just have to go for it.
My heart beating rapidly, I make a decision I hope I won’t regret tomorrow. Somehow, though, I don’t think I will.
“Can I ask you a question? And if it’s totally inappropriate, or you don’t want to just say so and I’ll be fine.”
He downs the last of his drink and turns to me. “Shoot.”
“Will you go home with me for the night?”
I purposely throw the words out in a rush, not because I think I’ll change my mind, but because I’m afraid I’d lose my nerve otherwise.
Liam just looks at me, probably trying to gather his thoughts. I know what his hesitation is, so I don’t allow him to even say it.
“I know I was drunk the other night when I first propositioned you, and you were right to decline. I would have woken up the next morning with regrets. But that’s why I’m asking you now, when I’m one hundred percent sober—because looking back on the last decade of my life, I’ve never taken the time to explore who I am. What I like to do. Who I am as a person or a woman and I want to change that. It started with the hair, but there’s more to life than just the vanity part, you know? I’ve never had a one-night stand and I know that’s not a bad thing, but what if it turns out I like sex? What if I like more than missionary position and, there are other things, too? How will I ever know if I don’t take the time to learn?”
Liam swallows hard, this voice coming out husky and deep. “And you think I’m the one to show you all that?”
I shrug, my lips tilted up in a smirk. “I don’t know. But I think you’ll be respectful and kind and if it turns out I’m not a one-night stand kind of girl, you won’t be the guy to treat me like dirt after the fact.”
I don’t know how I am so sure of his character. Maybe it’s because Kiersten trusted him to get me into an Uber. Maybe it’s because he turned down a drunk woman who threw herself at him. Maybe it’s because Lauren so quickly left us alone and Lauren never used to leave us alone with men she didn’t trust in public. Girl code and all that.
But some
how, I know deep down inside that Liam is one of the good ones.
“I would never disrespect a woman like that.”
“We’ve only met a couple of times, but if I trust anyone with treating me with respect, no matter what the outcome, it’s you.”
Gesturing to get the bartender’s attention, he tosses his credit card on the counter.
“Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?”
Nervous excitement runs through me. Even if I wanted to back out, I wouldn’t. Just the possibility of having one night with a man like Liam has me feeling eager to get back to my place. It’s as if all these possibilities of who I am and who I might be have been awakened and a night of passion is the way I’m going to figure out the key to it all.
“I’ve never been more sure in my life,” I whisper.
He blinks once, a lusty haze on his face. Reaching out, he runs the back of his finger down my cheek. It leaves a trail of burning nerve endings in its wake. “If you change your mind, all you have to do is say so.”
“Which is exactly why I won’t.”
I know with everything in me, this will be a turning point in my life. Forget my car. Maybe trying new things isn’t a bad idea after all.
Chapter Eight
Liam
The air in my truck is thick with sexual tension. Ever since Ellery propositioned me the first time, fantasies of what could happen have run through my mind regularly. I have had to lean against my shower wall more than once after giving myself a mind-blowing orgasm to thoughts of what she looks like when she comes. But that was nothing compared to just being in this car with her, knowing what’s coming.
But I have to be sure. I don’t want to see the light dim in Ellery’s eyes. I won’t be responsible for that. I’d rather use my hand in the shower for the rest of my life than take away the aura around her. If she hasn’t thought this through, if she even suspects she will have regrets, she’s not ready for this.
“I know I sound like a broken record but I have to be absolutely sure this is what you want. Not that you can’t make your own choices. You just don’t strike me as a rebound girl.”
“Turn right there.” She points to the road ahead. “That’s the thing. I don’t really know what kind of girl I am. I’ve spent seven years trying to be someone else’s idea of appropriate. What if I’m not actually her? What if I’m a closet nympho and I don’t even know it because I’ve never had the chance to find out?”
I choke back nervous laughter. “I’d say that ex-boyfriend wasn’t doing it right in the first place if that’s the case.”
“I don’t know if he was doing it right. Or wrong. Or even mediocre.” She turns to me, lust in her eyes and I know this is definitely happening. “I just want the chance to find out. About myself. About the things my body likes and doesn’t like.” She licks her bottom lip and I already know whatever she’s about to say is going to make me groan. “And I want to find those things out with you.”
Yep. I’m done for.
Pulling into the parking lot she guides me to, I throw the truck in park. Reaching over, I grab her by the back of the neck and gently pull her to me, sealing our lips together. She squeaks in surprise as my tongue invades her mouth and the sound makes my dick stand up at attention. There’s no reason to go slow. The feel of her, the taste of her, the smell of her makes it impossible for me to take my time anyway. At least not in the cab of my truck. I want more, need more. From the way her hands grasp at my shoulders, I know she feels the same way.
Reluctantly, I pull away, but hopefully not for long.
“I will come upstairs with you. I will make you come so hard you see stars. And then I’ll do it again and again, just to help you find out more about your body than you’ve ever known.” She gasps at my words. “But you have to be absolutely sure. I know I keep saying it, but I will stop right here and now if there is even a question of you getting hurt once it’s over.”
Her wide eyes blink just once as she focuses on my words. “Oh wow. I never knew chivalry could be so sexy.”
“It’s not chivalry. It’s human decency.”
“Call it whatever you want. But if you don’t take me upstairs and ravage me like I’ve read about in those Regency romances, I will never forgive you.”
I smile at her inability to control her hormones. It makes me pissed off that whoever this Kevin guy is apparently gave her the bare minimum of a relationship. Ellery deserves better than that.
I don’t know where the situation between us is going, but I do know it’s about to be upstairs in her bedroom.
“Come on.”
I slide Ellery across the seat, lifting her out on my side of the truck simply so I don’t have to stop touching her.
Tangling her fingers with mine, she pulls me toward the staircase.
The apartment complex is a little on the older side but kept up nicely. Fresh paint, fresh landscaping, looks freshly power washed. It’s a nice neighborhood, which I’m glad for. Someone like Ellery should always live in a place that is safe and well maintained.
Her green door has a festive wreath with American flags all over it, announcing the July 4th holiday which is already over. I chuckle to myself. It seems Ellery may be a lover of holiday decorating. I like knowing that about her.
We’re blasted with cool air conditioning when she finally pushes her door open, and the hairs on my arms stand on end. I’m not sure if it’s the change in temperature or anticipation of what’s coming.
Ellery clears her throat, leaning back against the now closed door, hands behind her. “So. This is my place.”
“It’s nice,” I reply because what else is there to say? It looks like any other apartment I’ve been in—living room, kitchen, dining area. The furniture touches are obviously all hers, with a comfortable, homey vibe. But I’m not interested in discussing her decorating skills.
Sensing her nervousness, I approach, pressing both hands against the door behind her, caging her tiny body in. I knew she was short, but until this moment, I didn’t realize how much. I could pick her up and toss her in the air.
Maybe later, but for now, I reach down and pick her up by her thighs, pushing her skirt out of the way, and wrap both legs around my waist. She gasps.
“That’s better,” I remark now that we’re at eye level without me having to crouch over.
“I wasn’t expecting that.”
“But did you like it?”
She thinks for a second before a smile crosses her face. “I did. It was very alpha male of you.”
This girl and the random things she says. I like it. I also like that she’s so interested in trying new things. I can’t wait to find out what else she wants to try.
With no more patience, I take her lips in a searing kiss. It’s not gentle. It’s harsh and demanding, and she matches my tongue stroke for stroke. Her hands begin moving over my body, touching everywhere she can reach, clawing at my shirt. Pulling back, I use one hand to hold her up, the other to tug it over my head, careful when my shoulder tweaks.
She sighs when her eyes land on my naked chest. I’ve never had that reaction from a woman before, but it’s not unwelcome. It’s more than appreciated when she begins nibbling on my neck, down to my collarbone. She is as amped up as I am and I’m ready to show her things she never knew her body could do.
“This is all about you, babe,” I remind her, watching as her tongue snakes out to intertwine small licks with tiny bites and sucks on my chest. It’s driving me wild. “We have all night so we can start here. Or we can go straight for the bed. It’s your call.”
“Bed. I want room for us to roll around if we want.”
My eyes roll into the back of my head. “Fuck, you are going to kill me, aren’t you?”
“Only if you teach me how.”
A growl rumbles from deep in my throat. “You better show me where the bed is or I’m going to take you right against this wall.”
Her eyes widen. “You can really do that? I�
��ve never done that. Maybe I want that instead.”
I grind into her and she gasps in response. Nuzzling into her neck, I begin sucking, licking, nipping at a spot behind her ear that makes her groan.
“Yeah, I want it like this first,” she pants, and I don’t miss the word “first”. I have plans for all kinds of things I can show her “second” and “third” and “fourth”. “Do you have a condom?”
Dammit. “Not on me. Do we need to stick with oral tonight?”
Ellery whimpers and then pushes me away, jumping down onto the floor. “Don’t move from this spot.”
She takes off at a solid jog into what I assume is her bedroom. Mere seconds later, she emerges with a large box in her hands. “I got the variety pack, well, for variety. So, which one do you want?”
Her over-preparedness makes me laugh if I don’t think too hard about who she was originally trying to have variety with. I grab one of the ribbed for her pleasure condoms knowing it’ll have some extra room for me since I’m a little larger than the average man. Proportional to my body type and all that.
As soon as it’s in my hand she drops the box and jumps back in my arms, not holding back as she kisses me deeply, her hands reaching for whatever naked skin she can find.
My hands push up her thighs, moving her skirt out of the way again so I can have access between her legs. Sliding up the back of her thighs, I move her panties out of the way, and lightly brush her opening with my finger. She gasps and I know that’s my cue to keep going.
Confident that she’s secure against the wall and not going anywhere, I reach one hand around and slip my finger insider her. Ellery groans, her mouth still touching mine, but too sidetracked to do anything more than breathe as I thrust in and out, add another finger, and bring her to the brink of orgasm before slowing down.
Annoyed by her panties but pleased to realize they’re mostly made of lace, I force my fingers through the material and pull as hard as I can, careful to put all the pressure on my hands so I don’t hurt her.
Ellery giggles. “Are you really ripping my panties off of me?”
“Ripping sounds way more delicate than what I’m doing. I’m shredding these puppies to get them out of my way.”