by Susan Pease
How long have I been away, I wonder what’s happened to me? Looks like I’ve got it all wrong just like Eiki. This time it could be disastrous. The Scottish Mac Gulpa promised me that the time would be taken care of. Is it his fault or have I mucked it all up travelling myself? This is the pits, thought Jo miserably.
On the kitchen table was an old newspaper, yellow and torn so Jo decided to check for a date. According to the date ten years had passed since anybody would have read it! That meant that ten years had passed since she had travelled to Scotland, she would be twenty-one years old. She stuck to her rough calculations remembering the year she was in when she travelled. Jo never considered that it could have been longer than ten years. She needed to gather her thoughts and of course change her clothes; unfortunately there was nothing in her room to change into. This was a disaster; the only thought that kept hounding her was what happened over ten years ago? Tears pouring down her cheeks and her mind racing, she felt like she was losing her mind. Was this a bad dream brought on by a bad travelling experience, or was it really happening? She pinched herself, ran to the kitchen sink and splashed water on her face. She shut her eyes and turned around six times, then opened each eye one at a time. Jo shook her head and jumped up and down, still the same result, nothing had changed. Standing staring out the kitchen window onto the back yard, she noticed that a new house had been built.
I wonder if Mum and Geoffrey live there, maybe Mum won the lottery and built a new home? That would make sense; she always bought tickets with the small change in her purse. Mum said that one day it would be her turn to win, she thought excitedly.
Deciding not to be seen, she crept up to the house and looked into the window. To her delight, there was Geoffrey her little brother, the rat bag all grown up. He was sitting on the floor with a few children, telling them a story and it sounded like the adventures of Aunt Pepper. Then an attractive dark-haired lady walked in and gave him a cup of tea, some delicious biscuits and a kiss. Is that his wife? Geoffrey had his own family but where was Jo’s mum? It must be longer than ten years. As Jo moved away from Geoffrey’s house her brother became agitated.
‘Silvia, for some reason Jo seems to have popped into my mind. It’s been years since she disappeared and I’m sad to say I haven’t really thought of her for a while.’
‘Goodness Geoffrey, what brought her memory back, you haven’t spoken of her in years!’
‘Have no idea, it’s strange but I felt she was nearby somehow.’
Jo had already reached the road and memories ran around in her head, she too was confused and like Geoffrey, agitated. It was all too much. She decided that the only thing to do was to find the bush path that led to Corkuparipple Creek. She needed to find the village and get her aunt to fix things. Yes, she needed Aunt Pepper and the creatures to fix up the mess she was in. Jo did travel on her first attempt; she also managed to travel right into the future. This was becoming more apparent as the day went by. Eiki was stuck in Scotland and was in some type of future time warp. Aunt Pepper would have her work cut out to fix this dilemma. The day was steamy and the hot Australian sun shone mercilessly. Climbing over logs and wrestling with tall grass and prickly tree ferns, Jo managed to find the stepping stones that crossed the river. Some things didn’t change over time. Memories came flooding back and she held back tears as she soldiered on. Hopefully the Gulp-a-Waters and the Slurp-it-Downs were arguing as they usually do by the river. Jo felt that if they were up to their normal antics she would be able to hear them and approach them for help.
She waited patiently and then her prayers were answered. Jo heard two creatures discussing the idea of honey on bread instead of bread and butter in order to catch black fish. Peeping through the river reeds she noticed that they were young and not the pair she had met before. Fascinated with the fact that things had changed, she followed their conversation with much interest.
‘You know that I am absolutely right about honey, it makes the fish stick to the hook,’ said the Gulp-a-Waters.
‘No it doesn’t, they can’t grab hold of the bait on the hook because it’s too slippery,’ announced the Slurp-it-Downs.
‘What would you know? My dad says it’s the only way to fish.’
‘Well, my dad says your dad is a silly, fat, good for nothing Gulp-a-Waters.’
‘And my dad says your dad’s got a skinny behind.’
The two started tumbling and rolling along the riverbank, of course it wasn’t long before Jo heard a splash and the two were in the creek, shivering and laughing.
‘Do you want to hear a joke my dad told me,’ asked the Gulp-a-Waters.
‘Is it as stupid as your Gulp-a-Waters dad?’ announced the Slurp-it-Downs.
‘Well, do you want to hear it or are you just going to insult my dad all morning?’
‘Okay, tell the stupid joke, I’m all ears,’ snarled the Slurp-it-Downs, squeezing the water from his fur.
‘I’m the one with two sets of ears, you have small ears that are always blocked,’ snapped the Gulp-a-Waters.
‘Where will you always find diamonds?’
‘What a stupid joke, I guess in the ground somewhere.’
‘No you big idiot, think about it for a while.’
‘Before I do, stop calling me an idiot it’s not very good manners and I am supposed to be your best friend.’ The Slurp-it-Downs sat on the edge of the Corkuparipple Creek, his legs dangling into the water. With a serious look on his face he said sadly, ‘I give up.’
The Gulp-a-Waters was delighted that he had stumped his friend.
‘Okay, where do you always find diamonds?’
‘In a pack of cards you twit.’
The Slurp-it-Downs was astonished because the joke was actually brilliant.
‘That’s very clever you know. I bet my dad told your dad that joke. Your dad isn’t smart enough to have made it up.’
Jo was unimpressed with the language; there was no excuse to call somebody stupid or an idiot. Even if they were grumpy young creatures, these two should not talk like that and they should know better. In the back of her mind she wondered who they were. Once again the two started thumping each other with gum tree branches pretending they were having a sword fight. Jo laughed, it was good to be home, she just needed to be home at the right time. The light was fading and the bush started to become cold. Jo was happy that she hadn’t changed from her warm clothes.
You just have to have a win sometimes, she thought.
Aunt Pepper was her only hope of travelling back to Scotland to save Eiki from the Dark Elves. In the back of Jo’s mind she worried about what was happening in Scotland. At least all the village people in Scotland had gone to Eiki’s rescue. Had they found her? That was the question rolling around in Jo’s head. Jo wished that the pair would pack up and head for their village; she knew that it would be best to follow them. Everything was so different, with her luck the village may have moved. Jo was definitely out of luck because the two creatures were going to camp the night by the creek. This was a disaster as she was hungry and just wanted to see her Aunt Pepper. Should she approach the two and tell them her story or wait until the morning? Jo made the decision to travel into the village. She told herself to be less aggressive with her efforts and took a deep breath, relaxed and concentrated. Sitting crossed-legged, she prayed that everything would go the right way, this time. Absolutely nothing happened, she tried again, nothing happened.
‘What on earth is going on? It’s just not fair, I managed to travel before. What do I have to do to get anything right?’ wailed Jo.
The two creatures heard her plight and crept up towards her to see what was going on.
‘My dad said that years ago he met a Jo girl and she was his best friend.’
‘You just copy everything I say about my dad’, yelled the Gulp-a-Waters.
‘No I don’t, you always seem to know what I am going to say, how does that work?’ snapped the Slurp-it-Downs. Jo was sitting with her eyes closed, the c
ontorted face she was making amused the young creatures.
‘She wants to travel into our village, let’s travel her and she will think she did it,’ whispered the Gulp-a-Waters.
‘It would be funny to trick her into thinking she did it,’ said the Slurp-it-Downs.
‘Do you think we will get into trouble with our dads if we do?’
‘Don’t be stupid, nobody will know we did it,’ laughed the Slurp-it-Downs.
‘Wiggle your ears and touch your toes, let’s travel the girl and nobody knows.’
Jo felt the usual spinning and dizzy sensation; next thing she felt was the wind blowing around her ears. She was thrown down onto the grass right next to the meeting place. Everybody squealed with fright because she landed with such a thud. Gulp-a-Waters and Slurp-it-Downs raced to help the girl as they were worried she might have been hurt. An old lady hobbled towards the girl with a shocked expression on her face, it was Aunt Pepper!
‘Jo my dear, is that you? Where have you been all these years? We tried everything to find a solution to get you back and nothing worked. We never gave up on you. Knew you would find your way back, you’re so smart. What took you so long?’ Aunt Pepper was so much older and she had tears rolling down her wrinkled cheeks.
‘Everybody! It’s a blessed miracle; Jo has arrived home after many years. We all thought the worst, that she would be lost forever.’
‘Lost forever? I’ve only been away a day or two, it’s just that I came back too far into the future,’ exclaimed Jo.
‘Oh no, Jo you may have travelled into the future, but you’ve been missing for years, and Eiki is also missing. Do you know where she is?’
‘Aunt Pepper she’s in trouble, big trouble in Scotland.’
Jo explained what had happened the day Eiki tried to travel them back to the village. Then she told them about the Dark Elves and that she had tried to travel to Eiki to save her from impending doom. The townspeople were horrified, what were they going to do, the time had been all messed up and everything had gone wrong. Aunt Pepper was quite old now and the thought of travelling back in time to gain a better future seemed appealing. If she did manage to go back with Jo, all the years Jo’s family fretted for a daughter and sister would have never happened. It could change the course of the future they were now living. Everybody agreed that after a good meal and a decent night’s sleep, the creatures would work out how to go back, help Eiki out of a sticky situation and come back into the “real” time. That way everything would be the way it should be. There was no doubting it, when you mess with time terrible things can happen. Aunt Pepper sat with Jo and told her all about what had been happening while she was way. Jo was exhausted and after a warm cup of hot chocolate Aunt Pepper tucked her into a comfy Gulp-a-Waters bed. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day.
CHAPTER SIX
Back In Scotland
Mary had watched Jo disappear and thought how clever the Australian girl was. She didn’t imagine that anything could go wrong, so she immediately started preparing breakfast. It was decided that a meal of kippers would be well appreciated by everybody when they arrived back to the town. Mary was a great cook and had the preparations down to a fine art. It was still quite early in the morning and she thought everybody surely would be home soon. Under the ground, Semus was still hanging on to one of the Dark Elves. He was so mad; his eyes were nearly poking out of his head.
‘Let me go you skinny, bug-like creature,’ yelled the elf.
‘Don’t call me names; tell me were oor stuff is.’
The elf poked out his tongue and refused to show them where all the stolen goods were. This infuriated the large Mac Gulpa and he decided that they would burn down the underground village and destroy the elves. Eiki was horrified that the Scottish creatures were prepared to kill all of the elves. All they should do was find the stolen goods, give them a stern warning and go home. The Scottish creatures were true to their nature; they were ready to spill blood. They were all yelling and shaking, their faces red and dripping with sweat and holding their sticks up in the air screeching a battle cry.
What should I do, this is a terrible mess and it’s happened all because I ran after the elves? Looks like I have started a war, oh dear me, thought Eiki.
What if I travelled everybody back to the village? It would stop a war. She had become a little cocky and didn’t remember that she had found it difficult to travel two people. Why on earth did she think she could travel a whole village of angry creatures home?
Everybody would be so confused as to how they got home, they might forget about a war. I managed to travel Jo and myself across the world; surely a band of Scots would be a piece of cake, she thought naively. One could only hope that they didn’t all end up in another country. She separated herself from them, found a quiet spot and started to chant. Remembering that the Mac Gulpas and Mac Slurpas don’t travel, she knew it would cause the right type of panic to diffuse the war situation. Once they were travelling, there was nothing they could do. It wasn’t long before the Scottish creatures started to feel weird. They stopped and stared at each other in fright, thinking it was some kind of dark magic. Blue, purple colours surrounded the group. Yellow and white light lifted them gently, spinning them around, pulling them upward and out of the Dark Elves’ world. The elves jumped up happily, laughing at the sight of their enemy disappearing.
‘Hooray, they’re gone! We still have all our loot and they have left with nothing.’
As they were lifted out of the tunnel, the large Mac Gulpa could be heard yelling that they would be back. The only trouble was, Semus would not let go of the Dark Elf he had caught. So the elf travelled out of the underground village, swirling around, lifting upwards towards the Scottish village. It was squealing and wriggling, trying to escape, but being pulled towards his enemy’s home. The colour drained from his face; he knew he was in big trouble. An elf by themself would be weak and at the mercy of the Mac Creatures. The cold wind howled, sounding like a pack of wolves as the creatures eventually landed with a bang and a thud, rolling onto the soft grass.
‘What on earth did ye do to us, at first I thought it black magic, but it was ye,’ yelled the large Mac Gulpa.
‘Ye have brought us back to oor village too soon.’
‘Just in the nick of time I would say,’ said Eiki.
‘To fight and kill is wrong, they only stole from you; they didn’t hurt anyone.’
The creatures were in shock; nobody had ever challenged their war-like decisions before. It was all a part of who they were – fierce Scots. The wind had been taken out of the creature’s sails! They were speechless. The creatures had wanted to save Eiki and retrieve their stuff. The trouble was, the Scots had a history of violent battles and they thought it was the “way to go”. They had to get things settled between the elves and their town, and they had a desire to win. Eiki was a peace-loving Slurp-it-Downs, she only wanted the bangle, not bloodshed. She was miserable as she felt that the bangle was lost forever and she had failed. Eiki shuffled slowly back to the small house to face the music with Jo. When she walked into the kitchen Mary was preparing the food for everybody.
‘Hi Mary, where is Jo, we have all travelled back.’
‘Travelled back, wha travelled wi ye Eiki?’
‘The whole Mac party that left to find me,’ said Eiki politely.
‘Ye mean that ye travelled everybody hame, sae whaur is Jo, is she no with ye?’
‘Jo is with you, isn’t she?’ enquired Eiki.
‘Na lass, she went an travelled tae ye.’
It then dawned on Eiki that things had gone wrong; she slumped into the chair and stared into space.
‘Dae nae hae her wi ye?’
Eiki looked up at Mary. The tears poured down her face.
‘No Mary she isn’t with me, I think we have a problem.’
The village people were outside and not in the best of moods.
‘Ye ken oor toon is under siege. The elves fouter about and hae a gu
id gae of being a scunner,’ said the large Mac Gulpa.
In other words, he actually said, “You know our town is under siege and the elves bungle about and have a good go of being a nuisance”. Easy to work out once you get the hang of it. Everybody yelled out and held their sticks high in the air. Semus still had hold of the elf, his hand frozen around his neck.
‘Let me go you horrible creature, it’s not right, I haven’t done anything to you.’
‘Ye hae in mir ways than yin, ye haud yer wheest.’
Meaning, “You have in many ways than one, shut up”.
‘What do you think I am, you haven’t the right to tell me to shut up, so let me go!’
The creatures were confused as to what to do next. The war was over before it had even begun and hunger took priority. Rumbling creature tummies made unusual gurgling music and everyone looked famished. Semus decided the elf should be locked up until they decided what to do with him. He could be good bargaining power to get back all their stuff. Everybody went to get something to eat; after all, the Scottish tummies needed good hearty food to keep their engines going. It had been a frustrating and tiring night, full of disappointments with the reminder of the failure to retrieve the bangle and the village’s stolen goods. The elf was tied to a chair in the meetinghouse and everybody went to Semus’s home for breakfast. When they reached the kitchen they found Eiki in a terrible state. Mary explained to everyone what they thought had happened.
‘Jo had lots of trauchle travelling alone an unfortunately she has disappeared. I hope she hasn’t travelled into the Scottish highlands or out of Scotland?’ said Mary. Eiki sat stunned, the only thing that snapped her out of her misery was a large spider dropping down from its web, flying through the air and scurrying along the floor, then running up the leg of the kitchen table.