"You know me too well."
"I won't get to cook for you very much longer. You remember that you have to go to Ilyan soon, right?"
Yes, that. He wasn't thrilled. "To meet up with my squad and start physical training. I know. I'm scared. I wasn't expecting to be in the military."
"The paladins have always been a reserve branch of the military. You knew that going in."
"Yes, but I thought I would be sacrificed in The Cleansing before another war broke out. I can't be a soldier."
"Your direct commander is a paladin who will intermediate between all the paladin forces and the officers of the normal military. They know that you aren't a trained soldier. They will work with you. The head of the Clerical Division is Paladin Commander Tyrin. Below him is Paladin Disciplinary General Riz. Don't get on General Riz's bad side. If he has the word disciplinary in his title, you know not to mess with him."
This was all too much for him to handle. "I don't know either of those men. They weren't paladins when I was still in Ilyan."
"They are new paladins, red paladins. The entire Holy Order was overhauled after the botched Cleansing. Things are a lot different now. You'll see soon enough."
Then Jaylen had a dark and desperate thought. "Do you think . . . do you think they would miss me if I didn't show up?"
"Jaylen, no." Zeriel's mood became stone cold serious as he grabbed Jaylen's arm and glared at him. "I will not be the angel of a deserter. You will go to Ilyan and you will go through physical training. Then you will go with Requiem Squad onto the battlefield and you will fight against those Wolfekin werewolves. You will do it all with honor. Is that clear? I don't often feel this strongly about your decisions, but Sola help you if you try to abandon your duties to this country. I won't let the military commanders execute you. No. I'll do it myself. You knew what you were signing up for when you decided to join the Holy Order. I don't care if you think that you're capable of military life or not. You will learn."
Jaylen pulled away from him, feeling hurt by his harsh words. The tears swelled up in his eyes. Then he went to the bed and collapsed on it in a fit of crying.
"Jay, you can't show weakness like this in front of your squad or your commanders."
"I don't care! I don't want to fight or die."
"Paladins aren't supposed to cry. They will take so much out on you. You'll be their favorite new little punching bag. You'll be humiliated and used as an example to the others. You don't want that, do you?"
"No!" Jaylen screamed.
"Then at least try to control your emotions. I know this is terrifying. No one likes war. But when you find yourself in this state of hopelessness, think about why you are going through this and what you will be fighting for. Think about the citizens, the innocent children who will be looking up to you, cheering you on as you defend them. They can't defend themselves."
"But you don't understand!"
Zeriel sat on the bed next to him and massaged his shoulders. "But I do understand, Jay. I do. When I first decided to be some strange paladin's angel, I was terrified. Think about it. I was basically giving myself as a slave to someone I had never met. They could make me do whatever they wanted and I wouldn't have any of the freedoms I had in Heaven. I could have stayed in my father's palace with all of my wealth and fancy wines and cheeses, but I didn't. I wanted to do something great with my life. I needed more than jewels and pearls and frivolous tea parties. I took a risk."
"And Doran hurt you. He hurt you so badly."
"That is true. However, if I hadn't taken that risk, I wouldn't have met you."
Jaylen dried his eyes on his sleeve. "Will you be there with me? I can't do this without you."
"Paladins are always allowed to have their angels with them at all stages of training and on the battlefield. Don't you remember? You and I are bound together. We are one unit. We don't get separated. If you get sent off to the front lines, I go with you. If you are taken as a prison of war, I am taken with you. A paladin and his angel are inseparable. We share a tent, we share food, and we share punishments."
"Will they accept you, being that you are Fallen?"
"Didn't you hear what I just said?" Zeriel asked. "You have been pardoned of your crimes against the clergy. What does that mean for me?"
"That you have been pardoned as well."
"Exactly. Things will work out. Don't you worry."
Chapter 3
Jaylen couldn't have been less excited. He wore his chainmail and a crisp pale yellow tunic with silver wings on the front, the kind he used to wear as a paladin before everything went so wrong. He used to feel pride when he wore the uniform. Today, he felt nothing but fear. Today, he wasn't wearing it as a member of the clergy. Today, he was a soldier.
As Zeriel flew low to the ground, unable to reach higher altitudes with his feathers still growing back after the brutal treatment at the hands of Stephan, he tried to calm Jaylen down. "Being this nervous isn't going to help anything."
"I know. But I can't help it. I'm not cut out for military life. I don't do well with order and structure."
"Says the boy who adheres to vows and prayers and even had his girlfriend give him lashings with a bullwhip because of tradition."
"This is different. They won't like me."
He held Jaylen closer to him. "Don't say that. You have no way of knowing that. Listen to me. I've done this before. Doran wasn't happy about going through training and having to live in the barracks before being sent to the front lines. But he made it. You are much stronger than your father was. Don't let him win this. You are much more of a paladin than he was and I know you will be much more of a soldier as well."
"But the Vilyron military is so strict. I heard rumors that they have awful punishments."
"Then don't do anything wrong and you won't have to be subjected to those punishments. You are a good kid. Don't let the discipline scare you."
"But it does scare me. Haven't I suffered enough?" Jaylen asked.
"They don't care what you've lived through. They care about honing you into a warrior, fit for fighting the bloody battle on the front lines. You will come out of this experience much stronger."
Jaylen only shook his head as he clung to his angel's chest. If he was going to have any chance of not having a nervous breakdown, he desperately needed to change the subject. "So, why couldn't I ride Pegasa?"
"You will be allowed to have a mount after physical training. Once we are released from training and sent out into the battlefield, we will have much more freedom than we do at the beginning. Don't worry."
"You continually telling me not to worry doesn't actually make me worry any less."
* * *
Jaylen slid out of Zeriel's arms as they landed in the mage-glow-lit fields surrounding the capital city of Ilyan where numerous tents stretched far to the horizon. Horses were being led through the area as paladins in red surcoats and black chainmail sparred with each other on the outskirts of the encampment. Some of them swung their swords into straw training dummies, some were busy sharpening their weapons, and others were carrying bags on their shoulders. On the opposite side of the camp, lines and lines of hundreds of rough-looking men in silver plate armor stood at attention under the waving dark blue banners of the Royal Military.
They were the true soldiers here, the ones who had been brought up in grit and strength from the time they turned five years old. All they knew was warfare and combat. Jaylen watched in awe as they dropped to the ground and began doing pushups in their full heavy armor. None of them wavered. None of them tried to stop. None of them complained.
"See those men over there?" Zeriel asked, nodding towards the soldiers. "They're the soldiers, not you. You're only here because King Talyn is afraid of the possibility that this war could get very bloody. Paladins are the reserves and you will be protected by those brave soldiers over there. They will be the first ones on the battlefield and the first ones to give their lives in combat."
"They a
re braver than I could ever think about being."
"Most of them come from military families. See the man with the feathered helmet giving them orders? That's your cousin."
"Which one?" Jaylen asked.
"The oldest. Prince Averin. It is customary for the first-born prince to be a military leader."
"Of course. I knew that. I just didn't know that he had actually been training."
"During your time here, you will have to address him as Prince Commander Corrifus. He is the highest ranking officer. Oh, and don't think that you will get any special treatment because you share his surname. Blood relation doesn't go very far when lives are on the line. Plus, the soldiers don't have the same respect for the paladins who they feel have it much easier than they do." Zeriel pushed Jaylen towards the tent at the front of the camp where tables were set up. "It's time to get you registered. It's getting late and we wouldn't want you to get in trouble on your first day here, would we?"
Jaylen rolled his eyes despite the fear that gnawed at him. He gingerly stepped up to the table where a man in black chainmail and a red sash tied around his waist was flipping through paperwork. What was he supposed to do?
The black-haired man with the white sun sigil on his left cheek glanced up from his papers. "State your rank and name."
"Paladin Jaylen Amalas Corrifus."
He glanced up and scoffed as he looked Jaylen over. "Is this some kind of joke? Where is the real Paladin Corrifus?"
"I am Paladin Corrifus, sir."
"Are you serious?" The man asked. "How old are you, boy?"
"Sixteen, sir."
"Sixteen? Sixteen! This is the military, son! Are you prepared to fight and die for your country? Are you prepared to watch your enemies die in front of you?"
"Stand down, Riz. This one has already proven himself." The blond man in the golden armor with the dark red surcoat held out his hand to Jaylen. "Welcome. You must be Tainted Jaylen Corrifus. I am Paladin Commander Tyrin. Riz?"
"Yes, sir?"
"You do know who this is, don't you?" Commander Tyrin asked. "King Talyn's little nephew."
"The Tainted one who was supposed to be sacrificed in The Cleansing?"
"The same. But he has been pardoned for his crimes. There are many reasons he has been assigned to Requiem Squad."
"The cursed squad. Good luck living more than a week." General Riz chuckled as he walked off then started yelling at some other paladins who were tossing around a statuette of Sola.
"Don't let General Riz get under your skin. He can be abrasive, but deep down, he cares for every soldier and paladin we have." Commander Tyrin turned to Zeriel and bowed. "Welcome to our ranks, Fallen Angel. I trust that you will be capable of keeping your paladin in line without General Riz's prodding."
"One hundred percent, sir."
"Correct me if I'm wrong. I don't know much about fallen angels. We don't have any other Fallen here. You have to eat and sleep, yes?"
"That is correct."
"We don't have beds for angels. Can you share a bunk with your paladin?" Commander Riz asked.
"Absolutely."
Commander Tyrin scribbled something on a note card then gave it Jaylen. "This is your bunk assignment and barracks number. Report there after you have bathed with the others. On your bunk, you will find a bag with your new uniform and essentials. Settle in then prepare for lights-out. We are about to finish up everything out here. Your training will begin in the morning."
* * *
Jaylen held the towel tightly around his waist as he watched the other paladins bathing in the icy stream and splashing water on each other. Some of them laughed while they touched one another or tackled the smaller men into the water. He thought he could do this, but then reality hit him like thirty naked strangers.
"They won't touch you." Zeriel nudged him forward. "Just get in, bathe, then get out. Don't look at anyone and ignore them if they look at you."
"I can't do this." He whispered to his angel. "They'll all see me . . . naked."
"I know you hate it, but you don't have another choice. Here." Zeriel unbuttoned his shirt and pants then removed them.
Jaylen looked away. "What are you doing?"
"Bathing with you. If it makes you feel better, I will do this with you."
"Oh, Sola help me. Now there's a naked angel."
"I'll have you know that all baby angels are naked in Heaven until they are ten years old."
"Remind me to never be reborn as an angel. What is wrong with you people?" Jaylen asked. "Does this not bother you?"
"We simply learn to deal with it. And in Heaven, there's nothing weird about nudity. That's probably because angels don't really have a set sexuality."
"Okay, but I do. And I don't like this."
"Don't make me carry you. Then you really will have everyone looking at you."
"I'm not doing this."
"Then I guess I'll have to do this." Zeriel picked him up and threw him over his shoulder as he went towards the water.
"No, no, no! Put me down, you! Don't do this, Zeriel. They're staring at me. Don't. Ah!" Jaylen screamed as he was thrown into the frigid water. He stood up and spit out water then giggled as he splashed Zeriel with water. "You're awful. I hate you."
"No you don't."
Someone whistled then called out to them. "Oh, Jaylen! I was just taking a stroll then stumbled upon this fascinating sight. You humans have the strangest conventions, don't you agree? Though, I can't say that I'm not intrigued."
Against his better judgment, Jaylen turned around to see Gavin the incubus lying in the grass drinking a glass of wine as he watched the paladins bathing. He had disguised some of his demonic features so he wouldn't scare anyone away. And he was still wearing his mask. What was wrong with that guy? Jaylen groaned as he sank down in the water. "Zeriel, make him go away."
Zeriel finished fluttering his wings in the water to wash the dust from his black feathers. "Ignore him."
"But-"
"He just wants attention. If you ignore him, he will start pouting then go away to someplace he can sulk."
Jaylen covered his chest with his arms. "But he'll see me."
"Jaylen, everyone here has seen you. And guess what? No one cares. They have what you have, you have what they have. Literally no one cares."
"Except Gavin."
"Yes, except Gavin. But like I said, just ignore him. I won't let him touch you. Let's bathe then get to bed. I don't want our dear incubus friend to get any ideas."
* * *
After unpacking everything from the duffle bag and finding his new black chainmail and blood red surcoat emblazoned with the image of white wings surrounded by silver grapevines, Jaylen had succumbed to his fading anxiety and fell asleep in Zeriel's arms in the top bunk they shared together. It was just roomy enough for both of them, but the truth was that Jaylen didn't mind. Having Zeriel so close to him was comforting and he had become used to sleeping in his angel's arms. He didn't make the same mistake as two nights ago. Jaylen had removed the sky blue amulet and had wrapped it tightly in his extra undershirt and tucked it away in the bag. The last thing he wanted was to wake up screaming where all of the other paladins in the barracks would hear him.
It was the middle of the night when Jaylen was awakened by some of the other paladins snickering and whispering jokingly near his bunk. He closed his eyes again and tried to ignore them. He knew that he had to get as much sleep as he could. Morning would come all too early and he had no idea what kind of strenuous activities physical training would involve. But he couldn't stop listening to their snide remarks.
"So Demon Snack gets to bunk with his angel?" A large bearded paladin asked.
Another paladin whispered to him. "I think they're lovers."
"Hey, Demon Snack!" The large man shook the bunk. "Wake up, lover boy."
Jaylen rubbed his eyes as he peered over the edge of the bunk. "What do you want?"
"Did you make love to that demon that ate you
just like you do with your angel?"
How crude. "How did you find out that I was eaten by a demon?"
"Everyone knows. That's how you got your name, Demon Snack. We wanna see you kiss your angel. Kiss him!"
The other three paladins joined in. "Kiss him! Kiss him!"
Jaylen cried out as the boys grabbed his legs. "No! Let me go. Zeriel!"
Zeriel jumped down from the bunk and spread his ebony wings high in the air. He held his hand towards the ceiling where his glowing shotgun appeared. He aimed it at the men. "No one touches my paladin. One more word out of any of you and I will report you to General Riz. But before that, I will fill each of you with so much lead that you will sink the next time you go in the river to bathe. Is that clear?"
The crowd of paladins separated as an effeminate angel in pink robes with heavy makeup on his face and large golden hoops hanging from his ears strutted up to them. Jaylen would never be able to forget who that was. Tarael.
Tarael flipped the ends of his wavy hair. "Well, well. Why am I not surprised to find that it's little Zeriel making a fuss in here? Haven't you had enough of being a trouble maker?"
Zeriel's eyes narrowed. "This is none of your business, Tarael."
"It is every bit my business. I can't stand you."
"I haven't done anything wrong, so I suggest that you turn around and leave. You aren't welcome here."
"So what?" Tarael asked. "You think you're special because you get to sleep with your paladin while the rest of us angels are working all night long? Being lazy won't get you anywhere, Zeriel."
"I'm not being lazy. I'm mortal now. I have to sleep. And what exactly do you and the others work on? Getting drunk? Yeah, I smell the alcohol on your breath. You're not doing anything worthwhile. Don't try to demonize me."
"I don't have to. You've already done that to yourself."
Zeriel was obviously starting to get frustrated. "I don't know what your problem is with me. I'm not here to fight or argue. I'm here for Jaylen. That's all."
"Will you still sing the same tune when he inevitably messes up and you have to share his punishment?"
Angel of Darkness Books 1-5 Page 40