by Eva Brandt
“Not really, no,” I replied. “I’m having some strange flashes. I think they’re from Mathias’s memories.”
Declan’s expression twisted into a grimace. “He expected this would happen, but he also said that you should be able to grow accustomed to it soon. Breathe. Don’t fight it. It will go away.”
I was barely listening to him. He was so close to me now that I could see the specks of gold in his green eyes. Unbidden, my gaze was drawn to his mouth. I knew how those lips felt like on my own. I’d kissed them before, many times. I’d felt his hands on my body. I’d had him inside me.
Why did this strange distance exist between us? At that moment, I couldn’t understand.
Throwing all caution to the wind, I grabbed the lapel of Declan’s jacket and crushed our mouths together. Declan let out a muffled sound of surprise, but he did not resist. In fact, in only a couple of seconds, he was kissing me back with just as much fervor. Without separating our lips even for a moment, he crawled on top of me, his tongue dueling with mine, his cock grinding against my rigid erection. I buried my fingers in his hair, desperate for more of the delicious friction, for more of him, of his passion and intensity.
And then, Declan reached for my shirt and jerked it down. The cotton ripped and his hands made contact with my bare chest for the first time.
A shock of electricity erupted over me. My magic flared, responding to his touch, craving him and our union. Unfortunately, the same phenomenon reminded me that I had no right to do this while inhabiting this form. Mathias might have agreed to trade places with me, but he’d only done it to save my life and it didn’t give me a free pass to do whatever I wanted with his body.
I tore my mouth away from Declan’s and shoved him back a little more roughly than I’d have liked. Once again, Declan didn’t resist, and I felt even more confused and wary about his behavior.
“I’m sorry,” I somehow managed to say, despite the fact that I was breathing so hard my heart threatened to burst out of my chest. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Maybe not,” Declan agreed, “but I’m not complaining. Did you hate it?”
“Of course I didn’t hate it,” I answered. “But we can’t do this while I’m not in my body. We’re all over the place already. We don’t need an added complication. I’m not even sure if this is my own desire or something I inherited from Mathias.”
Declan rubbed his thumb over my lower lip in an almost absent-minded gesture. “It’s true that you’re probably borrowing some of Mathias’s memories and responses, but I think that deep in your heart, you want this too. You’re far too strong to be completely overwhelmed by the remnants of Mathias’s psyche. When you’re ready to acknowledge that, be aware that I’m at your service. You are and have always been my prince, Your Highness. I would be happy to serve you.”
The words shocked me to the core. I wanted to believe him, but at the same time, a part of me couldn’t help but remember that a week back, our relationship had been very different. “Is that right?” I asked, unable to keep my skepticism from my tone. “Is it me you want to service or is it Mathias?”
“The body is just a shell,” Declan answered without missing a beat. “Granted, I won’t deny that I appreciate it when the shell is attractive, but in this case, it doesn’t make much difference. I would have happily knelt at your feet even if you would have been in your regular body.”
I should have said no. Our relationship wasn’t in the right place for this. I still needed to wrap my head around everything that had happened to me and I wasn’t completely sure he realized and understood what he was saying. Even as a guardian, he’d never been particularly submissive and while he’d obeyed Alarian law, it had always been his own heart that he’d followed, not our orders.
But for some reason, I couldn’t turn him away. His voice held an honesty so sharp it sliced into my very soul. The imagery his words created in my mind appealed to me more than I had expected. I was already rock hard and before I knew it, I found myself nodding.
Declan smirked in satisfaction. “I’m on it, Your Highness.”
After that, nothing more was said. Declan dropped to his knees in front of me and unzipped my slacks. He kept his motions unhurried as if giving me time to change my mind. I appreciated it, even if a part of me wanted to tell him to get on with it already. Maybe he wasn’t rushing into this either. Maybe he felt the same pull I did and had just decided to stop questioning it.
Was that the real reason for his change in temperament? Was it simply because now he felt truly free to follow his natural impulses?
The thought should have scared me, but instead, it sent a shiver of excitement down my spine. Yes, it was a bad idea for Accursed to follow their impulses. Declan and I were no exception. But I was tired of lying and pretending. Before Lucienne had come along, I’d lived an emotionless existence. The gift she had given me could have easily killed me, but since it hadn’t, I would embrace it.
Once I made that decision, it was easy to take what I wanted. “Is anything wrong, Declan?” I asked. “Why are you suddenly so hesitant?”
“My apologies, Your Highness,” he said, already sliding his hand into my underwear. “I was merely lost in the moment. I will do better.”
My erection hadn’t softened in the slightest throughout our brief exchange and the moment his fist engulfed my erect prick, I hissed in pleasure. “Come on. Suck it already. And no teeth, werewolf, or I’ll snap them off, one by one.”
Declan’s green eyes flared gold at my command. He didn’t need to be told twice. “Yes, Your Highness,” he replied simply.
When he took my dick into his mouth, the world blurred around the edges. I had to brace myself against Mathias’s desk so I wouldn’t fall over. The wet heat of Declan’s mouth melted any resistance I could have possibly put up. The magic I had borrowed from Mathias crashed over us again, zeroing in on Declan with the same ferocious focus Mathias had used in the battle against me.
Declan didn’t seem to mind. On the contrary, when the shocks of electricity made their way under his clothes, he groaned in obvious pleasure. He started sucking faster, bobbing his head up and down my shaft with a greed that made me think that he really did want to consume me.
In a way, I felt the same. Clutching his hair so hard I was undoubtedly hurting his scalp, I started fucking his mouth with abandon. It was a good thing that he was a werewolf because otherwise, he would have trouble speaking normally once I was done with him.
Despite our angle, I easily spotted the moment when Declan popped the buttons of his jeans and reached for his cock. I tightened my hold on his hair even further. “That’s mine. You don’t get to touch yourself, not until I say so.”
He couldn’t answer verbally, not with his mouth full of cock, but I read his submission and agreement in his stance and his now golden eyes. To keep his hands busy, he ended up gripping my hips. His fingernails had turned into claws and the sharp tips dug into my flesh, but I didn’t mind it any more than he had my rough treatment. The scent of my blood filled the air and I reveled in it, almost as if I was a vampire, not a plague. Or whatever the hell Mathias was.
It was another thing I should have questioned, but at this point, I couldn’t have cared less. If Declan wanted to bleed me, I had no intention of stopping him. Anything we did together would undoubtedly be very enjoyable for both of us.
My magic pulsed over our bodies, becoming brighter and fiercer with every second that passed. I snapped my eyes shut in an attempt to recover at least some degree of control, but it didn’t really work. Flickers of light flashed behind my eyelids, reaching into my mind, my body, and my soul.
Another memory drifted to the forefront of my consciousness. It belonged to me—the actual me, not Mathias—and it depicted Lucienne, as she had been the time we’d met on the beach, in my mindscape. She and I had never gotten the chance to do anything sexual, but it didn’t matter. The mere sight of her determined, dark eyes was enough to give me t
he final nudge I needed.
With an incoherent cry, I buried my cock one last time in Declan’s mouth and came harder than I ever had in my life. When I fell over the edge, it was my soulmate’s name I called out. “Gods, yes! Lucienne!”
An onslaught of pleasure swallowed me whole, so powerful and potent I lost control over my magic. It flared around us in an explosion that reminded me of a supernova, the release of the primal elemental energies absorbing everything around us, including the air we breathed. I tried to contain it, but it was a losing battle.
My consciousness was swept away into the flow of pleasure and in the end, I succumbed to it. More unfamiliar images flashed through my mind, this time incoherent and out of context. When the strange kaleidoscope stopped, it settled on a sensual scene, a memory of kisses exchanged in the dark, of a handsome man with bright green eyes whispering endearments I could not understand in my ear.
The language barrier soon fell and his words flowed over me like a physical caress. “Yes, just like that. Feels amazing. Show me how beautiful you are.”
A renewed wave of pleasure erupted over me as the phantom touch of the man in the memory flowed over my body. It felt precious in a way very few things in my life had ever been. It reminded me so much of the time I’d spent with Lucienne, and yet, it was so very different.
I had no right to these memories, to this private exchange between Mathias and someone who must’ve undoubtedly been important to him at one point in his long life. Even so, I couldn’t help but cling to it, cling to the green-eyed man.
Something inside me strained and protested at my actions. In the vision, the stranger smiled at me. His unfamiliar features suddenly twisted into Declan’s face and the image cracked, shattering into a million pieces like a broken mirror. I fell back, once again aware of my surroundings, shivering through the aftermath of an orgasm I had partially experienced while in someone else’s memories.
The concept would have probably disturbed me more had I not realized I had bigger problems. Mathias’s office was an utter ruin. It literally looked like a hurricane had swept through the room, crushing furniture, scattering files, destroying everything in its path. Declan was on the floor in front of me, breathing hard and clutching his chest.
I knelt next to him, my mind working a million miles an hour as I tried to figure out what I’d done. “Are you all right? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” If I had, I’d never forgive myself.
Declan let out a low, husky laugh. “Not at all. Honestly, since moving here, I’ve gained a new appreciation for breath play. Believe me, I’ve had much worse.”
“You do realize that doesn’t reassure me at all, don’t you?” If anything, it was the complete opposite. Had Declan really gotten involved with Mathias because he’d wanted to, or was something more insidious at work?
“Darius, I’m fine,” he answered. “I enjoyed what we did very much. And I enjoyed it even more when you called out to our soulmate.”
He probably meant the words as a teasing comment, but I still wince when I acknowledged my mistake. I was no virgin. I’d slept with plenty of people in my life, most of them Alarian. Never had I made such a humongous gaffe when I’d been in bed with a lover. Granted, that might have had something to do with the fact that Alarians didn’t lose control over their senses as easily as other Accursed—or even humans—but that didn’t matter. I’d still insulted Declan.
On the other hand, it did seem that I hadn’t accidentally hurt Declan through my loss of control, which was a good thing. The jumble of emotions that swept over me at that moment was not one I was familiar with, and I struggled to find a way to tell Declan how I felt. “I’m so sorry, Declan,” I said. “I didn’t mean...”
I trailed off, not sure how to finish that sentence. I didn’t have it in me to ever apologize about the natural attraction I felt toward Lucienne. Up to a point, it felt wrong to deem my earlier words a mistake. Maybe the true mistake had been the fact that I’d allowed myself to fall into bed with Declan. I couldn’t apologize for that either since even now, I didn’t really regret it. I still should have been stronger, should have prevented Mathias’s powers from running amok. In that respect, I’d made a significant error and the fact that Declan was unharmed didn’t erase it.
Declan didn’t seem to have an issue with anything I’d done. “Darius, I was only teasing you,” he replied, confirming my previous guess. “Believe me, I get it. Lucienne is never far from my thoughts either. I understand how you feel and I’d never blame you for it. And for the millionth time, I’m fine. You didn’t hurt me with your magic, so there’s no reason to beat yourself up over it.”
I didn’t agree, but arguing about it wouldn’t help us. I decided on a different approach.”Let me give you a hand. I did say your erection belonged to me. I should probably—”
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, Your Highness,” Declan cut me off. “I came when you did. A natural response to your magic. I’m good.”
I let out a frustrated groan and made a mental note to return the favor some other time. I’d also have to look into the potential of breath play a little further. If it was truly something Declan enjoyed, I needed to educate myself on it properly.
I’d have asked Declan about it right then and there, but having an orgasm seemed to have cleared my head. Once the embarrassment and concern dissipated somewhat, an unrelated idea popped into my mind. “I’m not sure I believe everything you just said, Declan,” I told the former guardian as I got up, “but I think I might have had an epiphany.”
Declan stood as well and arched a brow at me, intrigued. His eyes were so green, just like those of the man in my strange vision/hallucination. “Oh? Do tell me more.”
From up close, the sight of his swollen-lips was even more alluring and sinful than before. I brushed my fingers over the edge of his mouth, where a drop of my cum lingered, and smirked. “Mathias used the life force of the mortals to track down Lucienne’s father, didn’t he? Well, we’ll go a different route. We will use the traces of the dead.”
* * *
Bjorn
In the kerfuffle and general confusion that followed Prince Darius’s miraculous recovery, I soon found myself unable to contact Lucienne. Someone always accompanied her or shadowed her steps. When it wasn’t Mathias, it was a member of the queen’s entourage or a noble who wanted to ingratiate himself in the new princess’s favor.
They were still going through with it. Despite the fact that Darius had supposedly broken the Alarian Vow, the Alarians were still going through with the wedding. They seemed to believe it was only a matter of time until the enchantment reemerged and needed to make the most of what little time they had at their disposal.
All that was well and good, but the Alarians didn’t know a very important fact. The man they were fussing over was not their prince. Yes, Lucienne was getting married, but not to Darius. She was getting married to the same man who’d almost killed us all, who had shot Declan and had stabbed Darius.
Malachai and I finally managed to slip into Lucienne’s quarters two days before the wedding was supposed to take place. It took a hefty dose of subterfuge, a distraction provided by Cardinal Vaughn and a combination of our respective skills, but we made do. We couldn’t go in through the front door, so we went around and climbed through the balcony. It was warded, and neither Malachai nor I had the type of magic necessary to undo the enchantment. That didn’t really matter, because all we had to do was knock at the door and Lucienne let us in.
“I’m glad you came to see me. I was getting worried that you were angry with me because of what’s been going on.”
“We’re not angry with you, Lucienne,” Malachai replied. “We’re angry at the situation. This isn’t right, you have to see that.”
“You have to reconsider,” I added. “You can’t marry Mathias Vandale of all people.”
“It’s not exactly what I intended to do when I came here,” Lucienne admitted, “but I don’t have much choice. Ever
ything is just a means to an end, Bjorn. If this will help keep you and everyone I care about alive, I have to marry him.”
She sighed and plopped down on her couch, looking utterly exhausted. I hated to admit it, but upon seeing her this way, I was reminded of my own plan, of the fact that I’d pushed Lucienne into something she hadn’t wanted. Lucienne hadn’t shown any discomfort over the moments of sexual intimacy we’d shared, but the fact remained that if I hadn’t needed to absorb her powers, she likely would have never agreed to grant me such liberties.
I was a complete and utter hypocrite.
Lucienne didn’t point this out. Instead, she shot me and Malachai an almost pleading look. “Look. I know this is weird. We just haven’t had the time to sit down and have a proper conversation about how our relationship is going, where it’s supposed to take us. And I’ve been doing things all wrong.
“But Malachai, Bjorn... Everything has a solution except death. I believe that. If this marriage can anchor me, we’ll automatically be headed in the right direction. I’ll be able to help you, in turn.”
“Yes, Lucienne, but can you really trust him to not take advantage of you?” Malachai argued.
“If we’re trusting him with Darius’s body and soul, my hand in marriage is literally not an issue,” Lucienne shot back, her tone becoming sharper, a little defensive.
“Lucienne, you’re missing the point,” I said. “I can’t deny that I’m jealous, but I’m not so petty as to ask you to call the marriage off just because of that. I agree that...” Gods, I couldn’t believe I was saying this, but it needed to be said. “I agree that you should marry him if his magic and presence anchor you. But that’s just it. We only have his word on that. There’s no guarantee that he does intend to protect you, or even that Darius and Declan are all right like he claims. For all we know, that might be a lie and the whole reason why Darius succumbed to the curse was because of Mathias.”
Lucienne grimaced but didn’t outright reject the possibility. “I know. But even so, in my heart, I feel like he’s telling the truth. I know it sounds strange and unreliable, but I believe him. And really, what other choice do we have but to trust him? Do you have any other ideas? I didn’t manage to come up with anything before the trial and now, it’s even less likely that I will, considering how closely they’re watching me. Malachai can’t do much either after that whole stunt with the pendant.”