by Amy Lamont
Of course, the first thing that floated through was the image of Deanna as she’d been this morning—laughing and joking and putting on a brave face. How had I missed the fact that she was so near death?
I knew how ill she was. Nobody spent months at a time in the hospital unless they had a major illness. I’d even given a shot at looking through her chart one day. My heart ached at the thought of all the procedures she’d endured in her short little life—needle biopsies, MRIs that had to be terrifying to her when she’d had her first at the age of three, countless rounds of chemotherapy and radiation. And for what?
Somewhere in those moments of quiet it came to me.
She’d been here as a gift to all of us. Her ability to smile and crack jokes while her small body was racked with pain got me through so many of my interminable, impossible shifts at the hospital. She brought joy.
A little crack in my heart healed just a bit at the thought. Deanna would love to know her life had that kind of meaning.
And as I thought of it, it occurred to me that Jared did the same kind of thing with his music. The lyrics he wrote, the songs his band played, gave people those small respites from their everyday lives. How many mornings had I woken up dreading the day in front of me, but after belting out one of his songs in the shower, found myself feeling better?
When I heard the bathroom door, I cracked an eye open. As if my thoughts had conjured him, Jared stepped inside, his arms full. As I watched, he moved, placing several fat pillar candles around the room. He took a couple of towels off a small bench in the corner of the bathroom and dropped them on the closed toilet bowl lid before dragging the bench over to the tub. He placed it close enough for me to reach and plopped another candle on it, along with an ice bucket with a green bottle peeping over the edge and two glasses.
At this point, both my eyes were wide open and I couldn’t fight a smile. He drifted through the room lighting the candles before moving to the wall switch and dimming the lights until the room was lit only by a soft, warm glow.
He popped the cork from the bottle of champagne and poured two glasses all the way to the rim. He handed me a glass and then moved to the middle of the room to begin stripping off his clothes.
I laid my arm along the side of the tub and rested my chin on top of it, my glass of champagne dangling from my fingers. I grinned when I realized how much he’d just done without saying so much as a word.
My gaze fastened on his hand as it reached behind his head to grab a fistful of his t-shirt and unceremoniously yank it over his head.
“Are you setting the scene for seduction? Because let me assure you, as much as I appreciate all this, you had me at the bubble bath.”
He shook his head at me as he tossed his shirt in the corner. He walked over to the tub and placed a long, lingering kiss on my lips. My eyes drifted closed, and the kiss was so sweet, I had trouble opening them again even after he pulled away.
“All of this is about pampering you, baby, taking care of you.” He pressed another soft kiss to my cheek before standing and reaching for the button on his jeans. “And if you’re seduced in the process, I guess I’ll just have to man up and take care of you that way, too.”
He finished his proclamation with a gusty sigh, as if “manning up” wasn’t his choice but he’d do it if he had to.
I flicked some bubbles at him with a laugh. “So you’re prepared to do your duty?”
My mouth went dry as he pulled his pants from his legs and made quick work of stripping out of his black boxer briefs.
He stepped into the tub, settling down behind me. “Well, it’s a tough job, but if it’s what you need, baby, I’ll just turn my head and think of England.”
And that’s how, on one of the very worst days of my life, I found myself settling back against a warm male chest in a sea of bubbles while dissolving into giggles.
When my laughter died down, I snuggled my head against his chest and then tilted my head to look up at him. “Thank you.”
He kissed the tip of my nose. “You’re welcome.”
“You know for a bad boy rock star, you’re awfully sweet.”
“Hmm, I don’t know if I can have you defaming me that way. You could do irreparable harm to my reputation.”
“Then I suggest you do something to convince me you’re not as sweet as you seem.” I took a long sip of my champagne before placing the glass on the bench.
He didn’t wait for me to goad him further. His hands traveled along my slick skin, over my arms, down to my hips, and without pausing he delved between my thighs.
I laid my head back on his shoulder as he plunged two fingers inside me.
“I like this, baby,” he whispered in my ear. “You’re all wet and slippery and ready for me.”
As he spoke, he used a thumb to strum over my clit and I arched my back, pushing my aching core harder onto his hand.
“My baby likes that.” He slid a hand up to cup one of my breasts, his thumb stroking over my nipple, mirroring the motions of his finger on my clit.
A long, loud moan escaped me. Every muscle in my body tightened in expectation. His fingers slid in and out of me, and never once did he let up on stroking my nipple and my clit. My hips bucked against his hand, my toes curling as he drove me closer and closer to the edge of an amazing orgasm.
“You’re gorgeous.” His voice came again as a whisper in my ear. “Do you know how hot it is to see you coming apart in my arms?”
The rigid length of him pressing against my back gave credence to his words. Every part of my body reveled in the sensations he elicited—his fingers thrusting in and out of my aching core, his thumbs playing my clit and nipples as expertly as he did his guitar, his voice and warm breath on my ear, his hard length against my slippery, soapy skin.
He sucked my earlobe into his mouth, laving it gently with his tongue before giving me a sharp nip with his teeth. That’s all it took to pull me under.
“Jared!” My body bowed as I cried out for him, my inner muscles clamping down on his fingers where they pressed deep inside me.
“I’ve got you, baby.”
I turned my head, tucking my face into his neck as electric jolts of pleasure flashed through my body.
When I settled down against him, just a few gentle aftershocks trembling through me, he slid his hands from my breast and my center, wrapping them around me. I nuzzled into his neck, his scent filling my head in a way that made me almost dizzy in the wake of the orgasm that just racked my body.
Weird how safe and comfortable I felt in his arms. Not a feeling I remember experiencing with anyone before.
But I didn’t want to dwell too much on that. I might be giving myself the fantasy of a week of wild adventure while on tour with a rock star, but I didn’t labor under the illusion that what was between Jared and I would ever be anything more than casual. In a week and a half, my carriage would turn back into a pumpkin. Jared would be busy recording and touring and partying like the rock star he was. And I’d be back in classes and working at the hospital and putting one foot in front of the other to try to get through each endless day.
I didn’t allow myself to think about how fucked up that was. Shouldn’t I be excited at the thought of finally living out the dream I’d worked at so long and so hard? I pushed the question down. Just like I did so many other times when it welled up in me.
I twisted in Jared’s arms. “Did you think I didn’t notice you haven’t gotten your happy yet?”
His lips curled into a smirk. “I don’t know if I’d say all that. Watching you come while riding my fingers gives me lots of happy.”
I turned and straddled him, bracing myself on his broad shoulders, and planted my center right over his rigid erection. I slid back and forth over him, and gasped at the feel of him rubbing against my already sensitized clit.
“I think we can do better at making you happy.” I offered him a wicked smile. “In fact, I think we can make me even happier wh
ile we make you happy.”
To prove my point, I rocked my hips back and forth. I didn’t take him inside me, but instead I rubbed my center against him, sliding his entire shaft along my core until his tip hit me in just the right spot on my clit and then back down again.
Jared groaned and his hands clenched on my hips, moving me faster along his length. I leaned down and nipped his earlobe.
“I want you inside me,” I whispered.
If possible, he grew harder against me. My head fell back and I couldn’t contain the soft moan that broke from my lips.
“Sorry, baby. We can’t.”
I kissed my way across his cheek while I continued the delicious friction of our bodies. “I think we can.”
“I’m afraid in all my preparations, I forgot one very important thing.” He pushed me down harder, holding me still against him. “But if you keep doing that, it won’t matter anyway.”
I pulled back to look at him, slipping my hands down to his chest to keep my balance. My eyelids felt heavy, weighted down by the combination of satisfaction from my release and the new desire building inside me.
I shook my head and damp tendrils of my dark auburn hair tumbled around us, sheltering us in a cocoon.
“Jared.” I all but whined his name, the aching need growing in me making me greedy and wanting.
“I didn’t bring a condom in with me. We need to get out. But if you keep doing what you were doing, I won’t make it that far.”
“Hmm, so I guess you’re not quite the Boy Scout, are you?” I brushed the tips of my breasts against his chest.
His fingers flexed on my hips. “Jesus, Paige…”
I laughed, a throaty sound full of amusement and the sense of power I got from being able to make this man, this strong, wild man, squirm beneath me. I leaned down to whisper in his ear. “If you were really a Boy Scout, I guess you would have come prepared.”
He ran his nose along my cheek.
“I’m definitely no Boy Scout,” he growled. “I’ll be happy to prove it to you the minute we get out of this tub.”
I ran my hands down his chest and rested them on his abs. Man, I loved his abs. I shifted my hips as much as I could manage with his tight hold on them.
“What’s the point of getting out of the tub if we’re just going to get messy again?” I raised an eyebrow at him.
“That sounds like a challenge.”
“Think you’re man enough to get me off again, Boy Scout?”
He grinned and then rocked forward, catching my nipple between his teeth. A sensation, one walking a tightrope between pleasure and pain, seared through me. He sucked it into his warm, wet mouth and used his tongue to tease the tip.
“Oh, God, Jared.” I jerked my hips against him and he loosened his hold on them. That’s all the encouragement I needed. I started the rocking motion of my hips again, slipping his cock along to just the spot I needed it.
He kissed his way across my chest, licking and scraping his teeth over every inch of skin he encountered. His beautiful blue eyes met mine with the intensity I’d come to crave. There was something about being the main focus of this amazing man.
“Baby, your sweet pussy grinding down on my cock is about the best thing I’ve ever felt.”
His raspy voice sent goose bumps dancing over my skin. I pressed down a little harder, dragging my pussy lips against him, moving my hips faster as the mounting pleasure spiraled through me and pushed me to seek more contact, more friction, more Jared.
Jared’s arms slipped behind me, cupping my shoulders, holding me to him, bringing me closer until my breasts pressed hard against his chest. “So good, baby. That’s so good.”
His gruff voice pushed me over the edge. I clamped down on him and rode him harder, keeping him pressed tightly to me as bright colors burst behind my eyes.
Wave after wave washed over me, but even as I found my release, I continued to move on him, frantic to bring him to the same place.
In seconds, Jared clamped down on my hips, holding me tightly to him, jerking his hips up to get closer to me.
I couldn't feel it, but the thought of him coming, spurting out against my skin hidden under the bubbles made me explode once again. I fell forward, dropping my head to his shoulder and biting down hard as every last bit of pleasure was wrung from me.
I don't know how much time passed, but by the time I became aware of my surroundings again, the water had started to cool.
Jared kissed the side of my head, holding me close against him. I continued to straddle him, hanging limply over him.
“We need to get out of here, Paige. I don't want you to freeze.”
“Mmmkay.”
He laughed and gave me a gentle shake. “Come on, baby.”
“Just five more minutes,” I murmured into his neck.
"In five more minutes this water is going to turn us both blue. Let's get dried off and let me feed you."
As if he had a direct line to it, my stomach growled in answer. I sat up with more energy than I would have thought I had just a second ago. “I could eat.”
He laughed again. “Why am I not surprised?”
Jared leveraged himself up to standing and stepped out of the tub. He held a hand out to me and helped me climb out next to him. Before I could move, he grabbed a towel from the stack he'd left on the closed toilet lid and shook it out. Turned out it was a big, fluffy white bath sheet. He stepped closer to me and wrapped it around my shoulders, tucking the edges into my hands and then running his hands briskly up and down my arms.
I held back a moan at the warmth that invaded me at his touch. He continued to move around me, making sure to sop up every droplet of water, seemingly oblivious to the fact that he was still naked and dripping.
He stopped only when he was satisfied I was completely dry and toasty warm. It was only then that he grabbed a towel and quickly and efficiently dried himself.
“Hang on,” he said when he finished.
He dropped his now sodden towel to the floor and strode out of the room. Once again I found myself admiring his retreating form.
In moments he was back with an oversized robe. He pulled the towel from my grip and wrapped me in the robe before herding me back into the suite's living room.
“What do you feel like eating?” he asked as he led me over to the couch.
I dropped onto the cushions and stared up at him.
When I didn't answer for several long seconds, he tilted his head to the side in a way that was so adorable I wanted to drag him back to the tub and have my way with him all over again.
I shook my head, unable to express all the emotions surging through me. “Thank you.”
The words seemed inadequate, but they were the best I could do. After my awful, awful day and looking into my crystal ball to see a future full of similar days, he'd managed to make me smile, make me laugh, make me explode with raw pleasure and feel things unlike anything I'd ever felt, in or out of bed.
And now, after all his care of me, I realized if someone had asked me a few hours ago what I was hungry for the answer would have been nothing. I would have said that I'd never be hungry again.
But here we were hours later. I was emotionally wrung out, but I felt more cared for than I could ever remember.
“For what, baby?”
“Everything.”
He shook his head and raised a finger to touch the tip of my nose. “I didn't do anything.”
“You're wrong. You did everything.” Emotion clogged my voice. And then me, Paige Jordan, the woman who didn't know the meaning of embarrassment, blushed. I could feel the heat in my cheeks moving up to the roots of my hair.
Jared grinned, leaned down, pressed a hard, sweet kiss to my temple and then stood and moved toward the bedroom. “Let me grab some clothes. Check out the take out menus. We can order whatever you feel like.”
And with that, my stomach rumbled again. This time with a lou
d growl that went on forever.
Jared glanced over his shoulder and laughed at me. “Guess at least one part of you hasn't been satisfied yet.”
I picked up one of the toss pillows from the couch and threw it at his head. He ducked into the bedroom before the pillow made contact. Instead, it hit the doorframe and fell harmlessly to the floor.
His laughter floated to me from the bedroom and I couldn't help but smile at the sound.
And then I got down to the very serious business of perusing takeout menus.
Chapter Five
“So are you seriously considering coming on the promo tour with us?” Jared pushed his empty plate away and slouched back onto the couch.
I stopped scarfing down my lasagna to raise an eyebrow at him. “Um, yeah. I wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it.”
And then a thought occurred to me, and my usual confidence, or overconfidence as my mom so often liked to remind me, fled. Maybe the reason he asked was because he hadn't really expected me to accept his invitation.
I mean, he and I had gotten together a dozen times since we met for the first time over Christmas. When he was traveling, or when my crazy schedule kept us from seeing each other, we always managed to stay in touch, texting and calling each other. Even the occasional sexting.
But maybe that's how he wanted to keep things—super casual. Maybe he didn't really want to introduce me to his band mates, or maybe I'd curb his usual partying on tour. He'd never really told me what he did when he wasn't with me.
But hell, he was in a band that had fans around the globe. His fans lined up to have him sign parts of their bodies, for heaven's sake. I'd be an idiot to think he'd been staying faithful to me since December. Maybe he was afraid I'd cramp his style.
“Hey, maybe you want to share whatever thoughts are going through that gorgeous head of yours. Because I'm thinking whatever put that look on your face can't be a good thing.” He leaned forward and clasped his hands together between his knees. “Are you regretting saying you'd go?”
“Is that what you're hoping?”
“Paige.” He stopped and shook his head, dropping it to study the floor before raising his eyes to mine again. “Are you kidding me? Are you actually afraid I don't want you to come?”