by John Bowling
CHAPTER XXX.
PRINCE AND PARASITE.
"Eternal smiles his emptiness betray, As shallow streams run dimpling all the way."
Pope.
"I say, Alred!" exclaimed the Atheling to the Norman parasite who hadaccompanied him hither, as they sat drinking wine the same evening,"what sayest thou to the baiting thy Prince has had to-day? I have nostomach for more. Malediction on them!"
"Heyday, so say I! Scrambling over moor and bog hither was bad enough,but parleying with quarrelsome thanes and with vulgar braggart churlssuch as these, I would not endure with a kingdom thrown into thebargain. Your Majesty probably thinks different."
"Whew! Not I, Alred! These garlic-bred swine have no more regard for theperson of a prince than for a scurvy villein. A malediction on them!They would pick my bones within a week, were I to attempt to rule them.By the bye, that huge Danish boor stood by me. I wish he had been at thebottom of the sea, for all that, when he enticed me on this fool'serrand. What is the lout's name? Sigurd?"
"The same, my lord. But be advised, for at bottom he's as loutish and assnarling as the very worst of them, and I would not trust my head in hisjaws for a moment; for as we passed him but yesterday, in our courtlyattire, I heard him under his breath snorting and grumbling like a boarwith a spear between his ribs. The churl! Would he have his Prince dresslike a scurvy swineherd?"
"Beshrew me, Alred, I never could make pretence of ruling such unwashenclowns. And then, into the bargain, every snarling villein elects to beking over his own starveling crew, and there would be a king for everyrood of land in England. I'll no more of it, Alred! I thank Heaven myskin is whole to go back to Scotland with."
"A wise resolve, I swear. Make further oath of fealty to William, andtake his subsidies. Then heigho! for a jolly life at the court ofMalcolm! or, what is better still, to Rouen, where summer's sun tarrieslonger, and winter's frosts pinch not the daintiest fingers. Theredark-eyed beauties are kinder, and easier in the wooing. That is Alred'sphilosophy. Canst thou gainsay the wisdom of it, my Prince?"
"Alred, thou know'st well the joints of my armour; thou hast pierced avulnerable spot. I vow thou hast waked one pleasant memory, sweet Alred;and there is but one sunny spot in this dreary wilderness ofinsubordination and braggadocia."
"What is it, my Prince? Has some nymph awoke the tender passion of lovein thy breast?"
"Rightly guessed, Alred! Did'st thou mark the fair Saxon, whose fieryzeal for our cause has been so marked. I did not fail to notice shemarked me much and often, and I flatter myself her admiration extendsnot only to our cause, but also to our royal person. How sayest thou? Byour Lady, a prize like that would be some recompense for our sickeningand intolerable journey over the wretched moors atween us and Scotland."
"Thou hast the eye of an eagle, puissant Prince, or, to be more correct,the eye of a vulture. I had hoped this pretty bird would fall to my net.But alas! thy eye has seen this comely virgin, and I am undone, I trow.Why, I have already pranked myself before her with some success; but nowI shall lose my quarry."
"Come, come, my jackal! don't despise thine office. Why, man, I nevergrudge thy picking the bones, when our royal self hath fed."
"Small thanks is enow for what is left when your gorge rises atit,--with my humble submission."
"Enough, enough! Canst thou get speech of her? Thou canst bear a messagewhich should be gratefully received. Tell her her Prince would like totender her his special thanks for her great zeal and devotion to hiscause; and invite her hither."
"Have a care, my Prince, and bait your hook daintily. Think you you willcatch your fish with the bare hook? By all the saints, I tell you I sawforked lightning playing about her eyes when I incautiously gave play toa little premature pleasantry. Nothing but an imperturbable and brazencountenance prevented my being transfixed with a thunderbolt. It wouldbe better to make a great show of bravery, and talk of plans for therecovery of the kingdom; throwing in battles, sieges, and valoroushotch-potch of that sort, by the bushel. You will have to tie this fillywith a pretty long tether, or you are undone, for she's high-spiritedand mettlesome enough for anything."
"Good, my ambassador-in-chief; thy wisdom never fails. Would I had mykingdom, sweet Alred, if 'twere only that I might make thee lord highchancellor! To be forewarned is to be forearmed: the net shall be asilken one. But now not another word, for expectancy is on tiptoe. Dothine errand, and I will bestow on thee further tokens of my regard ifgood luck go with thee."
"Pardon me, sire! If I am qualified to be lord high chancellor, I amqualified to give a little further advice in this matter."
"What is it, Alred? Prithee, come to the point at once: none of thysermons. When I am king thou shalt be court preacher, if thou affectthat office; but spare me now, an' thou lovest me."
"Well, here it is. When fair maids of this quality have favours togrant, mark me, they will have it done daintily. Faugh! What do you takeher for? Don't trust to second-hand dealings too much. Vulgar eyeslooking on at it! Pshaw! What a stomach you credit her with! Listen.This must be a grand passion; you are entranced, bewitched, dying forvery love of the matchless queen of your heart! Mark me, pitch yournotes high if you would have this pretty bird come fluttering to yourbower. Why, canst thou not rhyme a maudlin verse or two? Come, cudgelthy brains, and I will help thee with a stave; here are writingmaterials."
"Ha, ha, ha! I like thy notions. Come, thou shalt draw us up a rhyme,such as the gallant knights of Normandy address to their lady-loves. Bymy soul, I am three parts Norman, and the other part is not Saxon. SoI'll superscribe no screeching Saxon verse. I declare 'tis a languagewhich is a cross between the screech of a witch and the grunt of a hog.Something elegant, or I'll none of it, mark me, Alred."
"Well, it shall be something lofty, I warrant, as becomes a prince. Sohere goes:--
"Fair maid of the flaxen hair, And eyes of the heavenly blue,"----
"Bravo! Ha, ha, ha! Go it, sweet Alred? 'Tis fine! I'll sing that at mylady's tent door. Get me thy guitar."
"Pray don't interrupt me, my King. The poetic fire is burning; don't letus miss the glow of it.
"Fair maid of the flaxen hair, And eyes of the heavenly blue, Whose graces bewitchingly rare Have sweetly enchanted my view.
"Oh! haste to thy Prince ever true, Whose adored one ever thou art. Thy presence shall sweetly renew The joy to my languishing heart."
"Bravo! By my soul, Alred, I swear 'tis fine! 'Twould fetch St.Elizabeth from her pedestal."
"Well, if it will do, draw us up your proposal atop of it, sire, andI'll try its effect upon this dainty bird of a Saxon."
"Nay, marry! not I, Alred. I'll not spoil thy elegant rhyme by addingto't my bungling prose. Finish up thy letter handsomely, as 'tis begun,and I'll affix my seal."
"By our Lady, I'll promise many things, then, which thou wilt notperform, I warrant. Here it is; listen to't,--
"'FAIR SAXON,--Thy Prince is entranced, bewitched, by thy incomparable loveliness. My throne, my kingdom, were nothing compared with thee. Come to me; I vow to make thee the proudest dame in England. Fly to the arms of your impatient, expectant lover,
"'EDGAR THE ATHELING.'
"Now affix your sign-manual, sire. I warrant this would make the heartsof half the damsels at the court of Malcolm frantic with delight. Markme, this falcon will strike his quarry quick; if not, I vow I will notfly another this side Martinmas. Wish me luck, and a share in the spoilanon, my Prince."
So saying, Alred buttoned up his doublet, buckled on his sword, and,with the rakish air of an unprincipled Norman gallant, he swaggered offto the tent of Ethel. There, after many foppish grimaces, and muchfoolish adulation, he delivered the missive into her hands; adding to itsuggestions and explanations which Ethel scarce comprehended, and wecannot chronicle.