Meet Me in Bendigo

by Eva Scott

  ‘Then why didn’t he let you know he wasn’t coming?’ asked Mel.

  ‘I have no idea,’ she said wearily. ‘I need something for my headache.’ She rubbed her temples. Her scalp felt two sizes too small for her head.

  Nonna rifled in her handbag under the counter and produced a tablet wrapped in silver foil. ‘Here, take this. Joe, give her some coffee.’

  Joe dutifully poured a cup from his thermos and shuffled over to give it to her.

  ‘Thank you,’ she said, grateful for the thick, strong brew and the analgesic.

  ‘So what happens next?’ asked Nonna as she rubbed the spot between Annalisa’s shoulder blades with a practised maternal hand.

  Annalisa sighed, sinking into the feeling of being cared for and safe. ‘I don’t know.’

  ‘Maybe he had an accident.’ Mel shrugged.

  ‘And he’s in a coma,’ offered Joe.

  The door opened and Dave walked in, unwinding his footy scarf with a gnarled hand. ‘What did I miss?’

  ‘He stood her up,’ said Nonna.

  ‘Outrageous!’ Dave’s look of shock was nearly comical. ‘Hey, maybe he got deported back to Africa or wherever he’s from. Look at this.’ He pulled out a crumpled newspaper from his coat pocket and passed it to Annalisa.

  ‘Illegal immigration ring busted. A number of men, reported to be foreign nationals, were arrested in dawn raids this morning. The men are suspected of working illegally and are being held in a detention centre pending further charges,’ read Annalisa.

  ‘Oh my god!’ Mel grabbed the paper and read the article for herself.

  ‘So he was a scammer,’ said Nonna.

  ‘We’ve been through that.’ Annalisa would have given her right arm to lie down on the floor and sleep for a week. ‘The truth is that he probably came in, took one look at me and left. That’s what really happened. He didn’t like what he saw and I’ll never hear from him again.’

  Tears began to well before she was all the way through the last sentence and she gulped them back, desperate to keep what little dignity she’d managed to bring home.

  Her companions said nothing, letting the obvious truth settle around them. Nonna reached into her purse and pulled out a tissue. Annalisa took it silently and blew her nose.

  ‘So what,’ said Mel at last.

  ‘So what? Her heart has been broken again. That’s what,’ said Joe.

  ‘What I’m saying,’ said Mel, ‘is that this is the first time since Ben died that Annalisa has been interested in anyone. So what if it didn’t go according to plan? It shows her heart is open and healing. That’s a great thing, right?’

  ‘Right,’ said Dave, thumping the table with his fist. ‘We need to look on the positive side.’

  ‘Mel has a point,’ said Nonna. ‘What do they call that? A transition man?’

  ‘A rebound man?’ Mel said.

  ‘How about a bridging guy?’ said Joe.

  Annalisa laughed despite her misery. ‘You might be right.’

  ‘That’s my girl,’ said Nonna.

  ‘And that’s not the only man that Annalisa’s been interested in,’ said Dave as he refolded his paper, careful not to look at anyone in particular.

  ‘Yeah, he’s right!’ Joe crowed. ‘There’s that Ed guy. You know the one from the big hardware chain.’

  ‘I saw the sparks that day,’ Dave said to Joe.

  ‘Me too. She really liked him.’

  ‘Is that the guy you were telling me about? The guy who saved Luna’s cake?’ Mel perked up.

  ‘The devil you mean,’ said Nonna darkly. ‘He’s been sent to ruin us.’

  ‘I ran into Ed Carpenter at the café.’ She spoke quietly, just above a whisper, in the hope no one would hear her.

  ‘You what?’ Nonna heard her. She crossed herself as she did every time she heard Ed Carpenter’s name.

  ‘What was he doing there?’ Mel demanded.

  Annalisa shrugged. ‘He’s staying in Bendigo and stops at the café sometimes for lunch. He offered to buy me out.’

  ‘He what?’ Nonna shouted, gripping the countertop with her arthritic fingers as if she might fall over backwards.

  ‘I said no.’

  ‘You said what?’ chorused everyone together in blatant disbelief.

  She closed her eyes. ‘I said no because I’m going to fight for my family’s legacy. You don’t throw away a hundred and sixty years of hard work and dreams so easily.’

  No one said a word. She opened her eyes and looked at her friends and grandmother, all of whom were staring at her as if seeing her for the first time.

  ‘You have got to be kidding me.’ Joe shook his head.

  ‘What?’ She held her palms up.

  ‘Oh, mia cara,’ said Nonna mournfully. ‘That money would have set you up in a new life.’

  ‘But what about the store?’ Their response confused her. What had she done wrong? ‘Isn’t fighting for your family the right thing to do?’

  ‘Honey, they all had their time.’ Mel spoke softly, the way she’d heard her speak to Luna when she’d fallen over and scraped her knee.

  ‘What she means is they’re dead.’ Dave spoke with gruff finality.

  ‘That’s a little harsh,’ she said as she realised they didn’t support her decision, that maybe she’d made a mistake.

  ‘He’s right,’ said Nonna, reaching out and stroking Annalisa’s hair. ‘I’m sorry, cara, but all those people had their chance to live their dream. You need a chance to live yours.’

  ‘But what if this is my dream?’ She clenched her fists and pressed them into her thighs, not ready to let go.

  ‘Dave. Joe.’ Mel looked from Nonna to Annalisa. ‘I think this is our cue. Come on, we’re leaving.’

  ‘But I just got here,’ Dave complained.

  ‘Read the room, Dave,’ said Joe. ‘The ladies need to talk.’

  ‘I’ll call you tomorrow,’ said Mel as she ushered the old guys towards the door. ‘Which one of you reprobates needs a lift home?’

  ‘Call me later if you need to talk,’ whispered Joe to Nonna as he passed. To Annalisa’s surprise, Nonna blushed.

  She waited until everyone had left.

  ‘What’s up with you and Joe?’ She turned the tables on her grandmother before she could get a word in.

  ‘What do you mean? Nothing is going on between me and Joe.’ Nonna’s hand crept up to her throat and Annalisa knew she was hiding something.

  ‘Come on, Nonna. You and Joe have a thing going. Admit it.’ She was grateful to have a distraction, to not have to focus on herself.

  ‘We talk sometimes. It’s no big thing.’

  ‘Is that why you’re blushing like a virgin bride?’ Annalisa crossed her arms and grinned, feeling in control for the first time since she walked in through the door.

  ‘We’ve been friends for decades,’ said Nonna, straightening her cardigan and picking imaginary lint off the cuff.

  ‘You should go for it.’

  Nonna looked at her as if Annalisa had suggested she take up pole dancing on the side.

  ‘All I’m saying is that you deserve a little love and romance.’

  ‘So do you.’ Nonna turned the tables back again. ‘You deserve to go and be young and free. This place is not for you. It’s full of old men’s dreams. In fact, it’s full of old men. Period.’

  ‘Can’t argue with that,’ said Annalisa with a sigh. ‘What do I do? Just shut up the shop? How will I make an income?’

  Reality came racing towards her like a wave running up the beach, threatening to tow her back out to a sea of uncertainty. She’d been there once and had no intention of ever going back again.

  ‘You don’t make an income now,’ Nonna pointed out. ‘It’s an illusion. Money comes in and goes out again but none of it sticks around. You don’t notice so much because you have a roof over your head and no mortgage to pay.’

  ‘One good thing the last hundred and sixty years had to offer,’ said Annalisa, t
rying to see the silver lining.

  ‘So make your doll houses. Try. Maybe consider selling off the back paddocks. We don’t use them for anything and the only thing that grows there is wildflowers. Who knows, the neighbours might be happy to add to their landholding. You should ask.’

  Annalisa considered her grandmother’s idea. ‘I’d have enough money to keep me afloat for a bit while I got my business on my feet. Makes sense even though I’d hate to see the wildflowers go.’

  ‘There, see?’ Nonna clapped her hands. ‘You will figure it all out. You just need a little breathing space. Why don’t you go and pour yourself a glass of wine? Put your feet up. I’ve left a lasagne in the fridge. Get a good night’s sleep, flick through the book and everything will look better in the morning.’

  Annalisa laughed. ‘You’ve got me all sorted.’

  Nonna shrugged one shoulder. ‘Not yet but we’re getting there.’ She retrieved her handbag, sliding the strap up onto her shoulder.

  ‘I want you to think about what I said. I spent far too many years in the service of other people’s dreams. I don’t want you to end up the same way. Live for yourself for a change.’ She tucked a stray curl behind Annalisa’s ear and patted her cheek affectionately. ‘Sleep well, mia cara.’

  She locked the door behind her grandmother and turned off the lights. The sun had begun to slide towards the horizon, dragging all the warmth from the day with it. The cold seeping into her bones didn’t come from outside, it came from her own heart.

  She’d been stood up.

  The peculiar sensation of loneliness that came from abandonment stung, like having salt rubbed into an open wound. Not only was she once more alone, but unwanted also—a sensation Annalisa was not accustomed to.

  Before GardenerGuy94, her loneliness had been all about missing Ben. He hadn’t walked out on her for someone else or because he needed to find himself. He’d died. She had an appreciation now of how the two things were very different.

  Annalisa pulled her phone out of her bag and checked it. Nothing.

  GardenerGuy94 wasn’t in an immigration detention centre. He wasn’t in a coma or in custody. Those things were excuses masking the truth.

  While she didn’t know anything for sure, she couldn’t help but imagine all the scenarios he might be in: he was at dinner with an elegant blonde; he was laughing about her with his mates; he was spending the afternoon in bed with his girlfriend. Or his wife. Maybe he was playing with his three kids in the backyard.

  One thing she knew he was doing for sure: he was ghosting her.

  She sprawled on the couch and lost herself in the wormhole that was the internet, distracting her mind from chewing on the fact she’d been soundly rejected.

  Running out of places to hide her attention, Annalisa googled Ed Carpenter on a whim. She saw a handful of press items about him joining the family firm and his past as a landscape designer of some talent. Google also kindly shared a post on a protest against the opening of Carpenter’s Geelong warehouse a couple of years back.

  Annalisa straightened up and avidly read the piece three times, invigorated by the idea of doing something similar. She wasn’t alone. There were others out there who felt the same way she did, and while they hadn’t achieved their goals, their voices had been heard. As someone who’d been stood up, ignored, and generally disagreed with lately, Annalisa had begun to feel as if she might have something she wanted to say too.

  Ripley’s doggy eyebrows waggled in a frown as if he’d failed to find a missing bone or his favourite ball had deflated. His paw on Ed’s knee, he inched closer towards his face. If he didn’t know better he could interpret Ripley’s behaviour as concern.

  But he knew better. Ripley could smell the roast chicken Ed had picked up for dinner on his way home.

  ‘Darling, do reconsider,’ said his mother, Virginia, as she poured him a martini from the cocktail shaker she’d brought down from the main house. ‘I’m not sure sitting alone here brooding in the dark is a good idea. Come up and have dinner with me.’

  ‘I’m not alone. I’ve got Ripley.’ He accepted the martini gratefully. It had been a trying day. Annalisa had bruised him. No matter how many times he told himself he didn’t care, her words played over and over in his head. You’re nothing but a phoney.

  ‘Yes, but confess, you are brooding.’ Virginia arranged herself in an armchair, one leg folded elegantly over the other, her ice-blonde hair cropped into a bob so straight-edged you could cut yourself on it.

  He shrugged. ‘Tough trip.’ No point pretending.

  ‘Mmm, why do I feel there is more to the story?’ She raised her eyebrows, as if inviting him to tell his secrets.

  Ed rubbed his eyes with one hand. ‘Had a few home truths served hot to me. Not super pleasant.’

  He didn’t want to explain Annalisa to his mother. She belonged to the secret part of his life, the bridge that connected him to his past self.

  That version of Ed would not be so duplicitous. He wouldn’t be working for Rosie and Oliver in the first place, let alone trying to talk a woman out of her family business. He wouldn’t be hiding behind a persona, afraid that if the girl of his dreams knew who he was she would reject him out of hand.

  Turns out he’d been right about that bit. She had rejected him as Ed Carpenter despite the undeniable chemistry they shared. Yet he knew that if she’d give him a chance, got to know him, she’d feel differently. They had an emotional connection online and a physical connection in real life. All he had to do was find a way to bring the two sides together.

  He closed his eyes. God, he was exhausted—from walking the tightrope between his gut and his head, from toeing the family line at the expense of his heart.

  Annalisa wasn’t the only thing he yearned for; he wanted to thrust his hands in dark soil again and take joy from creating beautiful settings with living plants. He wanted to work in the sunshine and the rain, to close the door on his office and never return.

  Ed wanted his landscaping business back.

  ‘I don’t think I can do this much longer.’ He opened his eyes to find his mother looking at him, a thoughtful expression on her face.

  ‘I’ve been wondering how long it would take for you to work that out. All this time I’ve been watching you struggle like a champion swimmer forced to run track.’

  He blew out a breath, letting the tension flow from his body. ‘I’ve tried. I have. What Rosie and Oliver want from me hurts to give. I’m not like them. I keep thinking I’ll stay just one more month, then I’ll have enough money to start over but one month turns into two turns into three.’ He shook his head at his own weakness. ‘Why can’t I get it together?’

  ‘You’ve lost a lot, Ed. Processing the loss takes time.’

  ‘Yeah, but I didn’t get sick or suffer like other people during the pandemic.’

  ‘Not physically, although I’ll challenge you on suffering emotionally. I can see your pain on your face. You lost a cherished team member, a friend. You were quarantined. You lost business. You had to let go of your dream, albeit temporarily. The pandemic cost us all something, one way or the other.’ Virginia put her glass down on the coffee table. She leaned forward. ‘You can take your dream back, Ed. It’s waiting for you.’

  ‘I don’t have enough money to start again right now, and I don’t think I’ve got the strength.’ He leaned his head back against the armchair, defeated.

  ‘Well, that’s certainly true if you stay on at Carpenter’s. That place is sucking the soul out of you. Money isn’t everything, you know.’

  He looked at her, one eyebrow raised. ‘Seriously?’

  ‘Yes, I know it’s easy for me to say.’ She waved her hand eloquently in the air, taking in the Brighton mansion with its manicured gardens and all its trappings. ‘But the point still stands. Cash in your shares. Leave the family business. You hate it anyway, so why stay? Life is short. Go and do what you want to do and stop torturing yourself. Find a girl. Fall in love.’

/>   ‘If I cash in my shares, then a part of the business leaves the family. I promised Dad that would never happen, not to mention there’s a legal issue with that move.’

  He remembered the day his father had told him that he’d inherit one third of the shares of Carpenter’s Warehouse, on two provisos. The first, that he could accept the fact Rosie would be CEO and the second, that he would never sell his shares to strangers. Ed had agreed, taking the solemn promise to heart.

  ‘You don’t have to sell to some random person. You can sell to me.’ Virginia couldn’t disguise her eagerness.

  ‘To you?’ Ed tried to process what his mother was telling him.

  ‘Oh, Ed. I’m so bored I could scream. I have no purpose. I used to organise all your father’s business entertainments and events and that kept me nicely busy. I thought I’d like retirement after he passed but the truth is I feel useless, like I’ve been put out to pasture ten years too soon. Going into the office every day and annoying my stepchildren would give me a great deal of joy.’ She laughed with the pleasure of the idea.

  ‘But you always said being in the business would prematurely age you.’

  ‘Age is inevitable. I shall do it gracefully and with aplomb.’ She raised her glass in salute of the wrinkles to come.

  He smiled, imagining her getting under Rosie’s skin and driving Oliver to distraction.

  ‘Do consider my proposal, darling.’ She reached over, holding out her hand to him. ‘You’d be doing both me and yourself a favour.’

  Ed closed his fingers around her slim, cool hand. She had a point. If he sold his shares to her, his promise to his father would be kept. He’d also have enough money to do whatever he liked. More than enough. He wouldn’t be Corporate Ed Carpenter anymore. Maybe he could find his way back to himself. And to Annalisa.

  ‘Can I sleep on it?’

  ‘Of course you can.’ Virginia stood and deposited a kiss on his forehead. ‘Sleep tight, darling, and dream of your future.’

  She left him sitting with Ripley in the gathering twilight, hope fluttering in his chest. Maybe there was a way he could reclaim the future he’d thought lost forever.