'You aren't in a position to argue,' the voice insisted. 'Now listen to me closely, because I'm only going to say this once—I'm not about to make myself a gift to those nice policemen you have listening in on this call,' it mocked.
Hawk was barely aware of the demand for a million pounds in exchange for Holly's safe return, agreeing to everything that was asked of him, knowing that the police were taping the call. He was more concerned with the fact that Leonie was the one who was going to have to deliver the money, that they were going to have no choice but to agree to that very positive demand.
There were no guarantees that Leonie taking the money would give them back Holly, and there was every chance that Spencer would take delight in causing Leonie more suffering.
They had no choice but for Leonie to take the money Spencer demanded, but God, he couldn't stand it if he should lose Leonie too!
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Leonie listened to the tape of the conversation once more, knowing that neither she nor Hawk could help identify the caller, that the voice was too muffled and hollow for them to positively be able to do that. But they were nonetheless both still convinced that it had been Michael.
A million pounds. He wanted a million pounds. She was sure Hawk had that amount of money, but could he get it in time for tomorrow night, the time the caller had told them they could do the exchange at a busy underground station in the heart of London?
Hawk seemed to sense her worry. 'I've had my bank standing by since it happened,' he told her gruffly.
'Sir,' one of the policemen stood up, a fresh-faced young man who looked too young to be in the position of responsibility he obviously had. 'We don't advise that you—'
'I don't give a damn what you advise!' Hawk turned on him savagely, his eyes blazing. 'That's our daughter that maniac has!'
The young policeman glanced uncomfortably at Leonie. 'We understand that, Mr Sinclair, but you have no proof that—Well, it's going to be difficult to have Mrs Spencer watched in a place like—'
Leonie was no longer listening. What the young policeman hadn't finished saying was that they had no proof that Holly was still alive! Her hopes had been raised, only to be dashed again by the stark truth of that.
Hawk's furious face swam dizzily in front of her, the startled exclamations of the three men sounding distant to her as she fainted for the second time in two days.
She opened her eyes to find herself in her bedroom, the bedside lamp burning softly as Hawk sat grimly beside the bed waiting for her to wake up, having once again helped her into her nightgown. She smiled at him wanly. 'I'm sorry.'
He sat forward, clasping her hands in his. 'I can't let you be the one to go tomorrow, Leonie.' His eyes were shadowed with pain.
'I have to,' she reproved gently. 'You heard him—it's me he wants.'
'What does it matter who it is as long as he gets the money?' snapped Hawk.
She smiled sadly. 'We both know it isn't just the money he wants.'
'I'm not going to let him hurt you any more, damn it,' he said harshly. 'I promised you—'
She put a gentle hand against his rigidly clenched jaw. 'I love you, Hawk. I love you very much!'
He closed his eyes as if in pain, coming down on his knees beside the bed, his head resting against her breasts. 'God knows I love you more than life itself,' he choked. 'If anything happens to you—'
'It won't.' She lightly caressed the dark thickness of his hair. 'Hawk, make love to me,' she requested intently.
He raised his head to look down at her dazedly. 'It's too soon after—after—'
'No, it isn't,' she said quickly as both of them threatened to break down again at the painful memory of why it was too soon. 'Another week and Doctor Fulton will pass me medically fit for anything,' she continued in an over-shrill voice. 'Hawk, I need to be close to you, as close as we can get, I need to be a part of you!' she added intensely.
'I need you too,' he said raggedly, his face pressed against her breasts once more. 'But I'm afraid of hurting you,' he admitted gruffly.
'You're hurting me by denying me,' Leonie told him shakily, wondering if she would actually have to beg to get this sensitive man to make love to her, knowing she would if she had to.
The last thing Hawk felt like doing was making love, not knowing if he possessed the gentleness tonight that Leonie would need during her re-introduction to lovemaking.
But he needed her desperately too; he wanted to be buried inside her, to stay that way until she had to leave to get their daughter.
But what if he should hurt her, what if he should unleash the savagery he felt inside on this beautiful witchchild?
He daren't take the risk.
He was going to refuse her, Leonie could see it in his eyes. Not because he didn't want her, she was sure of that.
'Come and hold me.' She folded back the bedclothes invitingly. Hawk stood up, about to join her on the bed, when she stopped him. 'Not like that,' she said huskily, touching his denim-clad thigh. 'I want you to hold me in your arms like you did last night.'
Uncertainty flickered in his eyes, and she could clearly see the battle he fought within himself before reluctantly unbuttoning his shirt and then removing the rest of his clothes.
His body was warm, so very warm, and she snuggled against him, feeling his tension increase, casually draping one of her legs over his, knowing by his sharply indrawn breath that the contact had affected him as deeply as it had her.
He wanted her—she needed no further proof of that as she ran her fingertips lightly across the hard wall of his stomach down to the velvet shaft that pulsed at her softest touch.
She had never seduced a man before, never wanted to, but she knew that they could only live through the pain of uncertainty tonight by belonging to each other, completely and utterly.
Hawk's breath was sucked in in a gasp as she trailed kisses down his throat to his chest, suddenly gripped with curiosity to know if those flat brown nipples were as sensitive to her lips as hers were to his, flicking her tongue across the hardened nub, knowing by the way one of Hawk's hands clenched in her hair that he was just as aroused by the caress as she was.
Her hair trailed tantalisingly across his chest as she laved the other nipple with the hardened tip of her tongue, Hawk's breathing harsh above her as those kisses moved down his flat stomach, hovering at his full arousal, feeling his tension mounting, finally moving to encase his warm velvet, cupping him beneath that shaft as she heard him cry out his agony of desire.
He lay rigidly beneath her, fighting for control, moist against her lips as that control threatened to break.
His hand was rough in her hair as he dragged her head up and away from him, rising above her to become the aggressor, pinning her arms above her head as he captured first one breast between his lips and then the other in fevered torment, inciting a frenzy of desire that quickly had her writhing beneath him.
'I want you inside me,' she choked.
'Not yet.' His gaze was heated as it swept over her body. 'Oh God, not yet!'
His lips were hot against her, his tongue flicking and laving until an aching spasm of completion arched her hips high off the bed.
And still he held her beneath him, the ache becoming an agony that quickly rose up again, sobbing as the fiery completion claimed her once again, but knowing that Hawk still wasn't satisfied, bringing her to that point again and again until he pushed her legs wide apart and thrust into her with one smoothly fluid motion, her softness claiming all of him as he slowly sank that throbbing shaft full-length within her.
Some of the tortured desire left his eyes as he stared down at her heaving breasts, a fine sheen of perspiration dampening his body. 'Am I hurting you?' he groaned.
Leonie lifted her hips high off the bed, her softness moving against the long length of him before gently pulling away, repeating the action, moving up and down as he held himself above her, all the time her gaze holding his.
He gave a choked groan as
his mouth swooped down to claim hers, his movements matching hers now as he thrust heatedly within her, arching to kiss her breasts as she groaned her release once more, seconds later pumping his seed hot and fierce within her.
Leonie cradled his head against her breasts as he breathed raggedly, feeling his tears hot against her.
And then she began to talk. 'Sixteen years ago we lived in a small community on the outskirts of London.' She felt him stiffen in surprise, slowly raising his head to look at her, satisfied with what he saw as he once again rested against her. 'My mother liked to get out of London every chance she could—she loved to go down to the coast. At first it was okay, but by the time Laura and I got to ten we considered ourselves a bit old to go on to a beach and play with our buckets and spades.' She gave a sad smile at the memory of how grownup she and Laura had considered themselves to be.
'It was a Sunday,' she continued flatly. 'My parents wanted to go for a drive, which we knew would end up at the coast somewhere, but Laura had arranged to go skating with one of our cousins. I wasn't all that keen on skating,' she grimaced, 'so I said I would go with my parents. Mummy thought Laura should come with us, but Laura said she didn't want to, that she wanted to be with her friends.'
'She argued?' Hawk prompted softly.
Leonie gave a ragged sigh. 'Yes.'
He nodded. 'What happened?'
'My aunt said Laura could stay with them for the day, and so reluctantly my parents agreed. It began to rain almost as soon as we set out,' she frowned at the memory. 'Rusty was with us, and—'
'Your dog?' Hawk guessed correctly again.
'Yes,' she confirmed shakily.
'Leonie, you don't have to tell me this.' His hands cradled either side of her face as he gazed down at her intently.
She nodded. 'If we're to help Laura, I do.'
'And what about you?' he groaned. 'Is this going to help you?'
She met his gaze unflinchingly. 'I want to share all that I am with you, Hawk,' she said huskily. 'And to do that I have to share the past too.'
He rested his forehead briefly against hers, kissing her lightly before gently resting against her breasts once more.
'Rusty loved to go to the coast with us,' she began again. 'But he hated the rain, and he whined almost continually as it continued to pound on the car.' She swallowed hard. 'I don't know if that distracted Daddy or not, but suddenly the car gave a sharp lurch and we—we'd left the road. The car went over and over, finally—finally coming to a halt on its roof.'
Hawk's only reaction was the tightening of his arms about her.
Leonie drew in a harsh breath. 'I'd been screaming and screaming as it happened, and then suddenly there was silence, complete and utter silence, not even Rusty was barking any more,' she remembered clearly. 'And then I knew why.' Her voice broke emotionally. 'He lay lifeless on the crushed roof of the car, either his neck or his back broken, I'm not sure.' She shuddered at the memory, her nails digging into Hawk's back, although he gave no sign of complaint.
'And then—' She moistened her stiffly dry lips.
'And then the silence came to an end,' she choked. 'My parents were still alive, trapped by the crushed front of the car. My mother regained consciousness first, screaming in agony—'
'Don't go on,' Hawk groaned, his arms painful about her.
'I have to, Hawk,' she choked. 'I have to tell you all of it so that you understand.'
'All right,' he moaned, her pain his pain.
'Mummy's legs were trapped in the crushed and ragged metal, I could see she was bleeding, but the way the car was lying and the way the roof had been forced down almost to the level of the seats made it impossible for me to go to her. And then Daddy regained consciousness too. He must have been in just as much pain as Mummy, but he tried not to show it—he spoke soothingly to my mother until her screams faded to a painful rasp, comforting me in the only way he was able, by telling me over and over again how much he and Mummy loved both Laura and me.'
'Were you hurt?' Hawk grated.
'No more than a few scratches,' Leonie revealed heavily. 'You'll never know how much I wished Rusty's fate had been my own as the hours dragged on and on with my parents dying before my eyes!' Her eyes were fever-bright with the memory.
Hawk sat up to look at her sharply. 'No one rescued you?'
She swallowed hard. 'We always went by a country route, Mu—Mummy always enjoyed the country. It was a wet Sunday morning, a time when most people were still tucked up in bed. No one saw the car leave the road because there was no one else but us on the road!'
'Oh, dear God!' Hawk's pain increased.
Leonie nodded abruptly. 'My father talked to my mother and me for what seemed like hours—I learnt later it was probably three or four. He talked about everything he could think of to try and keep us calm, he was so wonderfully brave, until—until he realised Mummy was no longer listening,' she revealed in a choked voice. 'I don't know how long she'd been dead, maybe only minutes, but it could have been hours.' She began to shake, tears falling unchecked down her cheeks. 'She was only thirty-two, so—so beautiful and kind. And she was dead!' Leonie began to sob at the vividness of her memories.
'I don't want you to go on,' Hawk told her emotionally.
As she looked at him she knew all the tortures of hell were in her eyes. 'I have to, Hawk,' she groaned. 'Can't you see that?'
'Yes.' His expression was fierce. 'Yes, damn it, I can!' He closed his eyes as he crushed her to him with steely arms.
Leonie clung to him. 'Once Daddy realised— realised Mummy was dead he seemed to lose what little strength he had. He'd lost so much blood, and we'd been trapped down there for so long, I think he just lost hope. I tried to talk to him, to make him see that he had to live for Laura and me, but—They said later that they didn't know how he managed to survive as long as he had with the way his legs were—were injured.'
'How long were you alone in the car with them?' Hawk prompted softly.
'About another three hours, I think.' Leonie moved restlessly at the memory. 'The windows were completely crushed down, the doors wouldn't open, and by the time my aunt had raised the alarm because we hadn't called them as we'd promised to do it had been over eight hours since the accident happened. I was in deep shock—'
'I'm surprised you survived at all!' said Hawk with feeling.
She nodded. 'You can imagine what it all did to Laura, why she—'
'I understand completely about Laura,' he assured her. 'And we'll explain to Hal so that he understands too. But it's you who concerns me.'
'I was all right, in time,' Leonie dismissed abruptly.
'How could you be after all that you suffered?' Hawk said scathingly.
She shrugged. 'They sent me to an excellent psychiatrist—'
'Who did?' he demanded.
'My aunt and uncle.'
He frowned. 'The ones you and Laura went to live with?'
She swallowed hard, moistening her lips. 'Actually—there were two aunts and two uncles.'
Hawk's frown deepened. 'You mean you were moved about between your relatives?'
'No.' She avoided his probing gaze. 'Laura went to live with one uncle and aunt and I—went to live with another,' she revealed in a rush.
'They split you up?' he thundered.
'Try to understand, Hawk—'
'But I don't,' he exclaimed furiously. 'You and Laura had just gone through the worst trauma of your lives, you had actually lived through that trauma for eight hours, and Laura had been left with such a guilt complex that she's never got over it—and they separated the two of you!'
Leonie sighed. 'They didn't have any choice unless they actually put us into care. And none of them wanted to do that. Hawk, both aunts had children of their own, they couldn't cope with two emotionally disturbed ten-year-olds!' she reasoned sharply.
'So they coped with one each!' he said disgustedly. 'And what did that do to you and Laura? Hell, don't answer that,' he dismissed harshly. 'I've
seen what it did to you! How long did that go on?'
She shrugged. 'Until we were old enough to move out and get a place of our own together.'
'Too damned long,' he rasped. 'And this was why you wanted to fall in love with Spencer!'
Leonie gave him a puzzled frown, remembering her conversation with Laura before her sister's wedding. 'You heard that?'
He nodded abruptly. 'Not intentionally,' he defended. 'And I certainly didn't want to give you the opportunity to tell Laura how you felt about me!'
She gave a gentle smile. 'If you had you would have heard me tell her I love you very much. I think I always have. I was certainly filled with an uncharacteristic lust that first night we met!'
His eyes flickered with uncertainty. 'But you said—'
'I know what I said,' she acknowledged softly. 'But I'd been hurt so many times in the past that I was afraid to trust what I did feel. Especially when a certain man woke me the next morning hurling all sorts of insulting accusations at me,' she recalled heavily.
God, he had, hadn't he, had destroyed the gentle bud of their love before it had even had a chance to bloom.
He recognised that it had been difficult for Leonie to care for anyone again after what she had gone through, first with her parents, the separation from her twin, then her marriage to Spencer and the loss of her son. He felt emotionally moved that he should be the man lucky enough to receive the precious gift of her love. He was also sure that she had never entrusted anyone with the tragedy of her past before.
He wanted to make sure she never knew another moment's pain, wished he could make that possible for her. They had to get Holly back before they could even think about being completely happy.
It was achieving that that still worried him. He ached at the thought of Leonie being the one to confront Spencer, more concerned than ever now that he knew of all the pain Leonie had suffered in the past, pain that could have totally destroyed a less strong woman.
He had no idea what would happen to that strength if they didn't get Holly back!
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