by Mallory Funk
“I hate that I couldn’t fucking save her. When she told me to leave her, I felt a piece of me break off and stay with her. I couldn’t leave her, and I wouldn’t have if she was still breathing when the fire caught that room. When the light left her eyes and her body became limp, I knew that I had to go or I would be gone too,” I say, not bothering to hide how broken this mess left me.
He nods his head. “I know, brother. You would never leave a man or woman behind. I know that. I know it’s killing you, but you’ve got to stop beating yourself up because she told you to leave; she wouldn’t want you out here hating yourself while you could be holding the love of your life. Every moment should be cherished.”
I nod my head with everything he says. Stacey wasn’t a selfish person.
“I just wanted you to know that. I haven’t been back to the house since the night I lost her. I walked in and saw that fucking box and it fucking broke me. I’m not ready to open it and I don’t know if I will ever be ready. Seeing it just makes me sick knowing that I either have to open it or toss it. Makes it fucking final, you know? Real,” he says.
Before either of us knows what’s happening, a blur of Sophie runs past me throwing her arms around Torch.
She’s practically sobbing into his chest. “I’m so sorry you lost her. I don’t want you to be broken. I’m so sorry, Torch!” she says.
He hugs her tight.
“I know your fucking sorry, darling. It’s not your fault, I’m not going to tell you again,” he says to her and holds her until his sobs subside.
“Listen, I’m not right and I’m not going to be right for a long time. I figured I would tell you while my head was still partly there. I don’t know if I want to dig myself out of this darkness.”
I nod my head, and Sophie moves back and into my arms.
We stand there and watch as Torch starts his bike and heads out of there.
I walk Sophie in the house and hold her as she cries herself to sleep.
We all grieve in our own ways.
I prefer to suffer in silence.
Sophie needs to let it all go until her body is exhausted from crying and she can’t stay awake anymore.
Torch is probably going to drink and lose himself until someone or something pulls him back from the darkness.
There is no one right way to grieve. There is no specified time when you will heal, or a designated time when it gets easier to breathe in the morning.
The whole club will deal with Stacey’s death in different ways.
As I fall asleep holding my woman, I just hope that our grief is something that will bring us together and not tear us apart.
Chapter Twenty Four
Sophie
Everything was set up for the charity event in Stacey’s name.
I couldn’t believe that we actually pulled it off in time for prom.
The response we got was amazing. There were a lot of locals, and people in surrounding towns and cities, who couldn’t afford to dress up for prom.
What was also amazing was the amount of people that volunteered their time or gave away old and new dresses. Today was the day our town was hosting prom, but we also had surrounding towns’ proms to work at in the following weeks.
These were girls and boys who wanted help. I didn’t want anyone to feel ashamed to take some help.
The fact that a lot of Snakes brothers were standing around making sure that no one was bullied was amazing. You could tell that the Snakes had the town’s support.
Ella was running around making sure that everything was perfect and everyone was having a good time.
“I’m so proud of you, baby,” Trigger says whispering into my ear.
I shrug. “I didn’t do anything. I just came up with the idea,” I say. I can’t take the credit for this. This is everyone’s doing, coming together and helping out in a way that reminds us of Stacey.
When everyone is ready to go, Prez stands in front of the building where we are hosting the event, and everyone waits for him to talk.
“I want to thank everyone for being here. This has been a very hard few weeks for the men and women of my club. Those of you know that we have lost one of our own. I can say that Stacey was like a daughter to me. She was an Old lady of the club, and my son’s girlfriend. It cut me and everyone in my club deeply when she was taken from us. There will be no one who can replace her; she held a special something that we all will long for and look for in other people. Stacey loved all aspects of her salon in addition to fashion. Being in foster care herself, she never had the opportunity to get a dress and go all out for prom, the money wasn’t there for it. Prom was something she felt like she had been denied growing up, and if I could do something to give back then I fully support the decision to hold this every year for the men and women who can’t afford to experience it for themselves. So, let’s take a few minutes and watch the slideshow some women put together of Stacey and her life because it if wasn’t for her, we wouldn’t have been able to put this together.”
I stand back with my man holding me and I watch as picture after picture is shown of Stacey.
Next is a video of her and Ella goofing around. I can’t help but smile when I see how happy she was with her best friend.
When everything is said and done, there are a few minutes where no one speaks. We are all absorbing everything that we have just watched.
Stacey was truly an amazing woman.
After everyone was sent off to prom, the rest of us go to the club.
The beers were brought out and everyone celebrated the life of Stacey.
These last few months showed me how this club comes together in times of need.
I’m glad to be a part of it. It’s amazing how close everyone is. There is no question that we would all lay down our own lives for one another.
I look at Trigger on the other side of the room talking to his brothers.
I can’t believe how much my life has changed.
I went from a woman who didn’t care what tomorrow brought because I was always lonely, to this.
A family.
That’s what the Vicious Snakes brought me.
Trigger is a man who naturally felt like mine from day one, and there isn’t anything I would do to change that.
My life brought me to where I am now and who I’ve become.
I look down at the tattoo on the front of my shoulder. I’m wearing a tank top, and I’m always going to want to wear a tank top, because I’m proud to show everyone who I belong to.
I’m with a man that made it natural to be his.
Epilogue
Sophie
A few months later
It’s the monthly BBQ at the clubhouse and everyone is just as rowdy as last month.
My Uncle Bear is sitting with me outside talking my ear off about kids.
“Come on Soph, I need some kids to spoil. I think it’s about time that you and Trigger have a family?” he asks with his eyes pleading.
I shake my head at him. We have been over this time and time again.
Only this time, I had told Trigger that I was ready to start a family, but I don’t want to say anything in case it takes a long time for it to happen. It doesn’t happen fast for everyone.
“You will get kids when I’m good and ready. Then you can be a grandpop,” I say to him.
He looks at me in amazement. “I really get to be a grandpop one day?”
I can’t believe he honestly looks surprised.
“Of course you do. Just because you’re my uncle, doesn’t mean you won’t be the grandpop. I think my dad would have wanted it that way,” I say with a shrug.
When I’m pulled into a bone crushing hug, I can’t help but laugh. When Uncle Bear pulls away, he looks so happy. “Then you better get on it. Where’s Trigger… HEY TRIGGER come get your woman and get out of here,” he yells across the clubhouse and I can’t help but turn red from embarrassment.
“Uncle, there is no way that I’m going to l
eave to make babies right now,” I say in the most serious voice I can manage.
“Why, what’s the problem?” he asks, looking shocked that I’m not taking Trigger behind a tree.
“Because BEAR, she can’t go get jiggy knowing that you are expecting them to have sex. Talk about a lady boner killer right there,” Ella says.
I can’t help but laugh and nod my head. She gives me a high five when I hold my hand up.
She gets me, she’s my person.
“Quit bugging the girl about babies; they come when they come,” Prez says.
Everyone looks at him with slacked jaws.
He looks around at everyone confused. “What? It’s true!” he says with a serious face.
Ella bursts out in laughter. “Dad,” she says looking at him with a stern expression.
“What darling?” he says looking at her puzzled.
“You bugged me for Jacob Derek Knight for a long time. Now you want me to have another one like I’m some damn baby machine,” she says grumpily at her father.
“Well you’ve got to pop out a girl next is all I’m saying. You can’t just stop now. You’re on a roll,” he says, and I can’t help but laugh.
“Watch it Ella, he looks like he’s going to sabotage you and Damien if I get pregnant before you,” I say with laughter.
When my laughter subsides, I look at Ella who is looking in horror at her father. “You wouldn’t do that would you?” she asks placing a hand on her chest.
Prez looks away like he just heard something. “Hey Kid, what’s that you need? I’ll be right there!” he yells and runs away, Bear following behind him laughing.
“You really got him wrapped around your finger, don’t you?” I say with a smile.
She nods her head eagerly. “I do. It’s awesome.”
I laugh and throw an arm around her.
“Let’s hope that I can hide it better next time. The damn cravings always give me away,” she whispers.
That would be something I would like to see.
When I look at Trigger, he winks at me and walks away. I already have a feeling what he has planned tonight.
I shiver just thinking about it.
A smile breaks out over my face and I can’t wait until I can give my uncle the news that we are carrying. He sounds just as excited as Prez and it’s amazing to watch.
There’s nothing like family and I can’t wait to extend it.
Other Books by Mallory Funk:
The Hastings Brothers Series:
My Sweet Paige (Paige and Trevor’s story)
Without Claire (Claire and Sam’s story)
Crazy about Tara (Tara and Derek’s story)
Devoted to Courtney (Courtney and Cole’s Story)
Liam Hastings- Title T.B.A (Coming Late 2019)
The Davis Sisters series:
Loving a Davis (Ava and Mark’s story)
Falling for a Davis (Jessica and Tyler’s Story)
Davis Shorts (Baby with a Davis, Best Friend with a Davis, A father to a Davis)
Saving a Davis (Eliza and Carter Late 2019)
Carissa Davis (Coming 2019/2020)
Vicious Snakes MC:
Accidentally Yours (Ella & Damien)
Undeniably Yours (Olivia & Steal)
Naturally Yours (Sophie & Trigger)
Johnson Brother Series
Luke (T.B.A)
Author’s Notes:
First of all, I would like to say thanks to my husband and kids. The constant support that my husband gives me with every book, and the brainstorming sessions we do together to make this series what it is, is amazing. I feel so lucky to have someone like him at my back to watch me follow my dream.
Secondly, I want to thank my sisters and mother. I don’t know what I would do without them. They love reading every book and hearing my ideas. Sometimes I don’t make it easy on them!
Thirdly, I want to thank my beta readers. I love sharing my thoughts and getting your enthusiasm for my work. You all make me feel important, and the love that you have for my work is amazing and honestly makes me want to keep going to give you the words every day. You ladies have wonderful insights and great love for my work, and I always look forward to reading what you have to say.
Let’s not forget my readers! You guys are all amazing! I read every comment and review. I may not get to comment how wonderful you all are with every word and post, but your comments honestly make my day when I see each and every one of them. Thank you so much for the constant love and support.
Connect With Me:
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About the Author:
Mallory Funk has enjoyed writing since she was a child. Raised with three other siblings by a single mother, Mallory often places an importance on her characters having, or developing, strong familial bonds. Mallory has always wanted a big family and is now married with three children. Mallory has a strong sense of humour and loves making people laugh. Her teasing nature is always in good fun, and often shows up in her writing. Mallory can usually be seen at her home in Nipawin, Saskatchewan sitting with her laptop and laughing at her own jokes as she writes them into her newest book.